A Beautiful Melody (21 page)

The next day we’re due to fly back to Sydney to do our final two shows of the tour.
Theo has already been on the phone, trying to find someone who can drum for us. Although, I think given our time constraints, it might be best for us to agree to have a drummer found for us. We need someone professional enough to be able to do what Theo does. Drumming isn’t just about hitting out the rhythm. Theo manages to set the mood of a song with his beat. Each movement, each tap, each thump and clash are precise – deliberate. We can’t have just anyone.

“Any luck?” I ask as he disconnects from his last call.

“Maybe,” he says. “There’s a couple of possibles. I’ll meet them as soon as we get back. You might want to check them out too, see what you think?” he suggests.

“Yeah. I’d like that,” I smile
, sliding my arms around his waist as he pushes my hair away from my face and kisses me.

“I have to go. They’re expecting me at the venue,” he sighs, wrapping me in his arms and holding me tight, like he never wants to let me go.

I know it seems crazy that I agreed to marry him after only being together for a short while, and I suppose in a way it really is. But you have to understand that I’ve known Theo for a lot longer than the last few months. It’s not like we’re entering this relationship with sex and then learning about each other. We already know each other – sex was just the final step in a connection that we made years ago. Even when I didn’t know that Theo was Aramis, I still felt this great pull toward him, there was always something about him that drew me in. I see it as us finally giving in. Finally admitting that we’re soul mates.

Reluctantly, he leaves me at the hotel, taking Lachlan and Jack with him to help oversee the transport of our equipment. I can’t believe that this tour is almost over, so much has happened in such a little time that it feels strange that we’re about to go back home.

At the thought of home, I pull my phone out of my pocket and check the time. It’s been on silent, but I have about twenty missed calls and a few text messages. They’re mainly from Stephanie and my parents. I feel guilty for not talking to them sooner and I’m about to call my parents when the screen lights up and displays Stephanie’s smiling face.

“Hey,”
I greet her as we connect.

“Oh my god Nomes. Are you ok? I’ve been dying to talk to you. You’ve been all over the news,” she tells me.

“What? Why?”

“Marcus. That stunt he pulled on stage – it’s everywhere. You made the news headlines.”

“Bullshit,” I breathe, powering on the hotel’s TV. I flip through the channels, eventually landing on a news break and see myself, standing on stage, clinging to Theo as Marcus launches his guitar into the crowd again. Shortly after that, a short clip comes on where reporters are trying to get a statement from Dan Stolle. He simply says that the tour will go on as scheduled, and refuses to comment any further.

“Crap,” I say to Stephanie down the line.

“Yeah. So… I guess you chose Goth boy then?”

“Yeah
,” I smile. “I did.”

“What’s going to happen now? I mean with Marcus gone and all.”

I fill her in on the deal that was made after the disaster of a concert we had last night.

“Oh, and Steph – I’m engaged.”

“Fucking what?!” she shouts down the line.

I start laughing and fill her in on that too, and in the end, she’s congratulating me
and making me promise that we’ll all have dinner together soon.

When we hang up, I power the television off. The newsbreak has started to play again, and I don’t need to see it again – I was there, I lived it. I don’t need the reminder. Besides, I need to focus on making sure everything is ready to go to the airport.

I’ve finished with my room, and I know that Lachlan and Jack were all packed before they left with Theo. So all that’s left is Marcus’s stuff. Taking a deep breath, I move into his and Theo’s room. Theo’s bag is packed and sitting on the end of his bed. He was planning on leaving Marcus’s things behind, but I can’t bring myself to do that – despite his recent behaviour. I guess it’s because when you get to the essence of it, this all happened because Theo and I hurt him.

Opening the wardrobe,
I take out his duffel bag, noticing that he didn’t fully unpack. There’s only the few things he used while he’s been here to put inside. Hefting his bag on the bed, I place a few articles of clothing inside that I’ve found lying about the room before heading into the bathroom to collect his toiletries.

I open and close all of the cupboards and drawers, checking to make sure there’s nothing left behind, feeling glad for my thoroughness when I find that Marcus’s side drawer has his
iPod inside, as well as what looks like a music pad – you know those ones were you can write notes or lyrics on one side of the page and the musical notes on the other page? They’re like a journal for a musician, and I really shouldn’t be looking at it…

Curiosity
gets the better of me, and I sit down on the bed and start to leaf through it. I see the lyrics to a couple of his songs and smile, running my fingers over the page, feeling the indentations of the pencil marks with my fingertips.  Most of his lyrics are quite light hearted, and they reflect Marcus’s personality perfectly – he doesn’t seem to run very deep.

I continue to flick through, seeing lots of songs I haven’t
heard before, and songs we sometimes play. But it’s the last entry that catches my eye, because it has my name on it. The title says
Only One (for Naomi)

My mouth opens a little as my heart starts to thud in
my chest. Suddenly, this is the same as reading someone’s diary, but I can’t seem to look away. My eyes read on to the lyrics,

I think about you, caring more every day,

Losing track of time as my body yearns to be close to yours,

I’ve known you for so long, I don’t know why I’m holding back

Because you’re the only girl I want

The only girl I’ll ever want.

I know in my heart, you’re the one for me,

I try to be worthy of your love

Deserving of your touch

Please give me the chance to prove to you

That I’ll love you forever

You’re the only one for me

“I was trying to find a way to tell you how I felt,” Marcus says from across the room, causing me to drop the book as I gasp in surprise.

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have been reading that,” I stammer, my mouth feeling like it’s flapping about in my embarrassment.

He shrugs, and s
tuffs his hands in his pockets. He looks a total wreck, with two days’ worth of stubble growing on his usually clean shaven face, deep dark circles under his eyes and hair that looks limp and lifeless compared to its usual healthy shine.

“It makes no difference now. You’ve made your choice,” he says,
his voice emotionless as he moves toward me, pointing at his bag laying open on the bed. “I just came to get my things.”

“Marcus –” I start, although I don’t know what else is meant to follow. I’ve hurt him and he’s hurt me
. There just doesn’t seem to be any words fitting for this situation right now.

“Don’t bother
Naomi. I lost. You chose Theo. We all knew something like this was going to happen – we’ve been fighting over you since fucking high school. I just… you know, it never crossed my mind that you wouldn’t choose me. I was… I was sure we had something. Goes to show what I fucking know.”

He reaches out and grabs a hold of his bag, holding his hand out for his
iPod and notepad. “Last night Marcus…” I start again, but he cuts me off.

“Save it Naomi
. I don’t need your apologies. It’s all just words,” he says, taking the items from my hands and zipping up his bag.

“Excuse me?!” I hiss,
my eyes wide as my brow furrows. I can’t quite believe my ears right now. “I wasn’t going to apologise. I was going to ask you why you did that. Why would you humiliate me like that? You could have singlehandedly destroyed the careers of five people. You took the chance that was given to us and for your own childish reasons you made a public mess of something that was supposed to be private! How could you? This song claims that you love me and that I’m the only one for you. Is that how you treat the people you love Marcus?” I stand up from where I was sitting, my voice rising as I start to give voice to all of the things that have stopped me from being in a relationship with Marcus.

“You are selfish, you are conceited and you think that everyone on this earth owes you some sort of a favour, just because you choose to grace them with your presence. You use women like they’re pieces of gum – chewing them up and spitting them out like they’re a disposable commodity. You treat your brother, who works his arse off for this band, like he’s some maniacal control freak
. It’s not fair Marcus. You can’t behave like that! People have feelings.

“As for me, I have been stupid enough to carry a torch for you. All through high
school, I doted on you. I wanted you to choose me, but I knew Marcus, I knew that the first time I gave into you that you’d toss me out, just like all the rest. And you did Marcus, whether you screwed me or not that night, you still gave me the friend speech the next morning, you didn’t give me one bit of caring, one bit of kindness – nothing! You are a user Marcus, and until you grow up a little and take a good long look at yourself you are always going to be alone!”

By the time I’m finished, I’m screaming and I’m crying, all the hurt and humilia
tion I’ve felt at his hands has just come crashing down around me. He’s just stands there listening to me, his jaw clenched tightly as he glares at me, the only hint that he has any feelings about this at all is the glassiness that can be seen in his eyes.

“Are you finished
?” he asks quietly.

“Yes,” I whisper. “Yes I’m finished.”

“Good,” he says, hitching his bag up on his shoulder and heading for the door. As he rests his hand on the door knob he pauses as if considering something and then turns back to face me. “I heard you,” he states.

“What?” I ask, shaking my head in confusion at his words.

“I heard the two of you fucking - that’s how I found out about you and Theo. Weren’t you wondering how I knew? It’s not like you did me the courtesy of telling me before you both started sneaking around behind my back, moaning and yelling at the top of your voice. How long was it going on for? Was that whole ‘leave me alone’ speech just a cover, to keep me away? You could have told me you know. I’m a big boy – I could have taken it.

“But no, you decide to sneak around behind my back, while I’m trying to give you the space you asked for. Trying to be a better man in the hopes that one day you would change your mind. I thought that w
hen you saw how I’d changed you’d realise I wasn’t interested in groupies anymore – that I’d do anything it took to be with you. I respected your decision Naomi – I respected you enough not to pursue you while on tour – like you asked! And my fucking brother? Again?! What the hell is it with you and him? What does he have that I don’t have?!” he roars.

“He has my love,” I state, tears streaming down my face. His expression changes, and I immediately feel guilt
y for throwing that in his face. He looks as though his just been slapped.

“
I loved you first!” he bellows, glaring at me. I just stare at him with my mouth open as my tears flow freely. I have no idea what to say. No idea how to fix this. No idea! “You know what?” he says, grabbing for the door again. “You two obviously deserve each other. Have a fucking happy life. You won’t be seeing me again.” Turning on his heel, he opens the door to the hotel room, slamming it behind him as he walks out of my life.

I drop back down on the bed and bury my face in my hands, crying until my tears just won’t run any
more. What a mess we’ve all made of this. I should have known letting Marcus back into my life was never going to be a good thing.

***

“Hurry up,” I insist, as I press the down button for the elevator repeatedly.
I’ve got what I came here for and I just want to get out of here and as far away from her as I possibly can. One thing Theo was right about – we never should have let her in the band. I was an idiot to think this could work.

I hit the button a few more times, wishing the lift would just hurry the fuck
up. My mind can’t stop running through the argument I just had with her. I can’t believe she’s with Theo! I felt so sure that if I cleaned my act up and showed her that I could stop sleeping around that she’d choose me. I was positive. Goes to show what I know…

“Finally,”
I grumble, as the LED display becomes a downward pointing arrow and the elevator doors open. Much to my despair, inside are Theo, Jack and Lachlan, and not one of them look happy to see me.

“You’ve got a hide showing your face here mate,”
Lachlan bites out, his head shaking from side to side as he looks at me like I’m something you’d scrape off your shoe.

“I’m leaving
ok? I just came to get my stuff,” I reply steadily, refusing to show any sort of weakness to these three. I know they’re angry with me for what I did last night. But I can’t deal with their shit right now. Not after what just happened with Naomi.

“
Good, and don’t come back. We don’t need your crap Marcus. You could have ruined us last night,” Jack adds in, his arms folded over his chest as the three of them block my entry into the lift.

My brother is strangely silent. I would have thought that he, out of all of them, would be the first one to start yelling at me for breaking up the band on stage last night.

“Don’t you have some sort of smart arse comment too?” I demand from Theo. He just glares at me. I can feel the rage rolling off him, it’s mixing with my own, daring one or the other to pounce.

“No?” I say
, stepping a little closer to him. “Nothing? You’ve got nothing to say to your only brother? The one you just stabbed in the back!”

“I think you’re the only one who’s done any stabbing, Marcus,”
Jack accuses.

“None of us would ever do that to you. You don’t know the shit we had to go through after you left. I think you’re lucky that Theo isn’t ripping your throat out,” adds Lachlan.

“You have nothing?” I yell, ignoring the others, furious at him for not reacting.

“Just go Marcus,” he says coolly, stepping to the side to let me pass.

“What’s wrong? Are you so whipped already that you can’t fight your battles anymore?
She
was happy to let rip at me before. Does she have your balls Theo? You’re not even going to do your usual, and punch me?” I bellow, rage seeping out of me as my vision narrows and all I can see is red.