A Brilliant Ride (14 page)

“Madam, I assure you. I’ve been honored with Top Salesman three years in a row now. I’m quite proud of that.” He puffed out his small chest and stood at attention.

“Ha! Very funny,” I laughed in his face. “Oh, no, I’m not getting pulled into this again. Now get back to flying around, or whatever it is you do in your spare time, and let me shop in peace.”

“Well, I have never been so insulted,” he said and stormed off adjusting his little grey hairpiece.

I realized, after a moment, I was mistaken and felt my stomach drop to the floor. “This angel thing has really got me nutty,” I whimpered.

Suddenly there was a
commotion. Glancing over to my left, I saw about twenty women in a circle laughing and sort of swooning back and forth. I quickly ran over to see what the excitement was and pushed and elbowed my way to the center of the growing crowd. To my amazement, in the middle of the huddle stood a fabulously dressed gentleman twirling shoes in the air like a circus performer. He sat Claudia down and presented her with a pair of pumps as if she were Cinderella. I came in closer and caught the gentleman by his elbow.

“Hello there,” he said turning to face me. “May I fit you as well, my dear? Do sit down and let me assist you. I exist to assist you know.” He winked slowly.

“You again! I knew you were here.” I felt faint and collapsed in the chair next to Claudia. She took one look at me and put her wrist up to my nose.

“Here, inhale slowly…”

“Oh, not that again,” I wailed. “That only works for you. Honestly, Claudia, please get your hand out of my face.”

I felt nauseous and wondered if I remembered to put my inhaler in my handbag. “Brilliant, please leave this store imme
diately,” I demanded, pulling on the collar of my blouse. “I need air…”

Claudia looked at me like I had two heads and laughed. “Pen, what
are you going on about? What’s brilliant?”

“Er, um; don’t let this guy fool you, Claudia. He says he’s an angel.” I whispered in her
, clutching my chest. “I’ve come across him before.
He has this way about him
…”

“He certainly does,” she purred. “He’s an angel, alright. My, my, my, he’s
divine
!” She gazed at him with starry eyes and offered a toothy smile.

The rest of the women were actually stroking him and swaying back and forth like they were in some sort of trance.

I searched Brilliant with pleading eyes.

“Don’t be so stiff, Penelope; loosen up a little,” he said, blinding me with his smile.

“Loosen up? Are you kidding me? What are you doing here? And why do these women look like they’re in some sort of altered state?”

“Oh, that?
It’s love
!” he beamed. “Come on and feel the love,” he sang. “Love, love, love…it can do wondrous things, my dear one.” He danced a little jig. “They feel the love emanating from me, and it’s intoxicating. It’s the great love I carry, you see. Feel the love, love, love,” he sang out even louder.

I looked at Claudia, she was swooning, and I knew she was lost, rendered powerless against the hypnotic pull of the mighty angel.

Feeling the pull, my body started to sway as well. I pinched myself and fought hard to resist. “I have to keep it together,” I cried and straightened my blazer.

In a panic, I
searched the Designer Shoe Department, desperate to find someone, anyone, who wasn’t under the angel’s spell. It was a lost cause. Everyone was intoxicated with love. Their voices sang out like a million ringing bells, “Feel the love…love….love…feel the love.”

I looked for the manager, but it was useless. He, too, was swaying back and forth, gazing at a pair of sling backs singing, “Love, love, love…feel the love.”

I tried hard not to succumb to the hypnotic chant and hurried over to the next department.

I steadied myself at the Ladies Gloves’ counter and took a deep breath.

It wasn’t working; the gloves in the casement lifted, clapping to the tune…“Love, love, love…feel the love.”

I bolted over to Casual Sportswear, but they too were frolicking as Brilliant’s voice boomed over the PA system, “Love…love…love….feel the love!”

Over in Designer Suits, Brilliant was leading a parade of sharply dressed women. Lined up one behind the other, holding on to each other’s shoulders and weaving in and out of racks and mannequins, they formed a giant conga line. “Love…love…love…feel the love.”

He picked up the beat, and the conga turned into a frenzy of synchronized dancing. Hips swayed and limbs popped out in every direction. “Yeah, come on, that’s the way…one, two thr
ee, turn…one, two, three, step…love, love, love!”

I sat down with my head in my hands. He was everywhere, singing and frolicking with total abandon. “This an
gel is out of control.”

Brilliant’s voice boomed louder, “Yahoo! Feel the joy! You, humans, need to enjoy the freedom of your beautiful bodies! Whooohooo! Jump and shout; feel your muscles move about.”

My mouth hung open as he leaped through the air. Sailing through the Hat Department, a long silk scarf wrapped around his head, he looked like a flying gypsy. “Come on, Penelope, dive right in,” his voice sounded out like a trumpet.

Holding my heart, I let out a moan
, as the lights in the vast department store flashed on and off, and the chandeliers spun around like giant disco balls. “Oh, please God, please make it stop.” I closed my eyes tightly, praying for it to end.

With that, in a flash of light, it stopped and everyone went about their business.

The Shoe Department was back to normal, Ladies Gloves had all gloves back in place, Ladies Suits right on track, and Claudia was chatting with a couple of women who looked both disheveled and bewildered as they untied long scarves from around their heads.

“Claudia,” I screamed, “let’s pay for these shoes and get out of here!”

“Okay, okay…geesh, what’s the rush? I feel like we just got here.” She looked at her watch. “Wow, is that the right time? That’s odd; time really flies when you’re shopping for shoes. Whooohoooo, I feel great,” she said, stretching. “I think I’ll get these little black numbers,” she purred. “
What a find
, totally off the hook! They kill my feet, but they’re
gorgeous.
Oh well, the thrill of victory, the agony of the feet,” she sang. “What about you, Pen? Did you find anything?”

“Er…not what I expected…”

“Huh?”

“Are you alright Pen? You look a little pale.”

“Oh, nothing that a few hundred years of
psychoanalysis
won’t fix,” I said, wiping my brow.

“What?”

I stared at the shoes in my hand, grabbed Claudia’s arm and cried, “Let’s get out of here.”

The weather had changed, and the wind was whipping. A blast of cold hit us as we made our way back to the car. Claudia grabbed my arm, “Look, there’s Jackie.” She was stepping out of her fire engine red Ferrari.

“Jackie,” I called out, and we hurried over to her.

We were shocked to see a large bandage wrapped around her head. It was enormous and looked like a gauzy turban. Jackie, being Jackie, had a very large brooch pinned on it - in the center - just over what Phyllis taught me was the “third eye.”

“Wow, Jackie, what happened?” Claudia asked in shock, her eyes transfixed on the ornate brooch.

She looked at us with sad eyes and said, “Um, I fell.”

“How horrible; how did it happen?” She stared at me, and I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up. She seemed really shaken.

“Are you ok? We’ve been worried about you? We haven’t heard from you in a few days, and we were wondering what was going on. You haven’t returned any of our calls.” Claudia patted her bob, which was disheveled from the wind. “Darling, you missed our fabulous
Instant Face-Lift Party
; Paul was counting on you...”

I grabbed Jackie’s hand and notice it was bruised. I assumed it was from the fall. “Oh, I’m okay,” she said forcing a smile. “I slipped in the studio. I spilled something and forgot about the floor being wet; I went flying, right on my head. Sorry I haven’t called. I’ve just been up to my eyeballs. I’ve decided to leave Teddy,” she said in a bright tone.

“Are you sure?” I said softly. “Maybe you two can work it out.”

“No, it’s useless. We never were good together. I think I’m better off single. Free, to do what I want, you know? I don’t know why I ever…marriage isn’t my bag. Anyway, I’m looking at a fabulous duplex on 69th street.” She gave us both a kiss on the cheek. “Let’s get together for drinks,” she said and wrapped her fabulous sable around herself.

“Aren’t you going to the costume ball?” I asked. “Please don’t tell me you’re going to miss that, too.”

“We always have such a blast,” Claudia pleaded. “Come on, Jackie, it won’t be the same without you.”

She stood motionless, the wind blowing hard against her. Suddenly, she looked very vulnerable and small. I wanted to put my arms around her.

She stared at me, her green eyes intense, and I couldn’t read her thoughts. It made me uncomfortable. A chill ran through me and I shivered.

“Yes, I’ll be there,” she said with a forced smile. “I’ll see you there. Kiss, kiss, gotta run. I have a few things to pick up…bye, bye.” She was off in a flash, the heels of her high boots clicking against the pavement as she hurried into the doorway of Leighton’s.

Claudia looked at me and shrugged her shoulders. “Jackie’s a strange bird. I mean, I love her, don’t get me wrong…but she can be kind of mysterious.”

“Yes,” I agreed. But, there was more to it than that. Jackie seemed different, really rattled.

Blossom and the
girls were still out, and the house was quiet. I threw my keys on the sideboard and looked through the mail. I noted Sam’s briefcase on the kitchen table and called out, “Hi, anyone home?” I looked around the corner and opened the hall closet. Sam’s tennis racquet was missing. “He must be at the club.” I rubbed my throbbing head. I’m wrecked. That scene at Leighton’s was absurd. I can’t take much more of these
angelic encounters
.

I decided to put my feet up and headed upstairs to the master bedroom. The moment I entered, I could feel a change in the atmosphere. “Oh,
not again…I know you’re in here…”

“Fabulous!” Brilliant’s voice thundered. “You’re learning my child. I told you, with time you’d learn to feel me.” I turned and saw him sitting at my vanity surveying my toiletries. “Hmm, you know there really is no need for all of this,” he said pointing to my array of lotions and creams. “What you need is a supernatural face lift. Yes, when you move in the supernatural, the wrinkled face of worry disappears, like that!” He snapped his fingers.

“Um, sounds intriguing, but no thanks.”

“Penelope, I’m quite confused about your behavior earlier,” he said plainly.

“Please, not again. I need a break. I’m absolutely exhausted,” I said and threw myself on the bed. “I need to relax. I feel a migraine coming on.”

“Well, it’s no wonder. You’re so tense.” He walked over and positioned his palms over my body. Without touching me, he slid them up and down the length of me. “Aha! Just as I suspected!”

“What?” I jumped.

“You need to be balanced. It’s simple; your energy isn’t flowing properly.”

“Oh, is that all.” My face fell.

“Here, le
t me wire you and balance your chakras.”

“Huh?”

He did some swirling movements with his hands and sang a song in a language I’d never heard before. I was reminded of Saffron - that nut job - from the Up and Coming Goddess.

“Are you speaking in tongues?”

“My dear, you need to release a lot of pain. You have a lot of pent up emotion…it’s because you hold on to uncomfortable memories. This is very dangerous for the psyche and most detrimental to the human body. I want you to try an exercise for me. Would you please?”

“What the heck; it can’t be any worse than the fiasco at Leighton’s.” I rubbed my head.

“Bravo!” he replied and kicked up his heels. “Okay, this is what I’d like you to do. Are you ready?” he sang.

“Yes, I’m ready,” I sang back.

“Okay, now, I want you to close your eyes and bring up any painful memories or negative thoughts you might be holding on to - hurt, guilt, anxiety, that type of thing. Got it?”

“Yes”

“Now, I want you to visualize a box, Penelope. Open the box, and place all of your negative emotions directly into it.”

“Okay; I’ve got it.”

“Very good, now imagine you’re holding a lit match,” he instructed. “Throw the match into the imaginary box and close the lid. As all of your negative emotions burn, affirm the following: I release all negative emotions - pain, anger, depression, anxiety, guilt, and sadness - with the faith that, once released, they can never return, in any shape or form.”

I followed his instructions precisely, and to my astonishment, I felt wonderful.