A Burn To Bear (Fire Bear Shifters Book 3) (3 page)

One thing River knew with certainty, though—she wouldn’t buy whatever excuse Luke came up with for breaking their date and then ignoring her calls and texts. Her brief lapse of judgment had ended, and she was not going to give Luke a second chance at a date. As she pulled into the parking lot of her apartment complex and put her Jeep in park, she pulled out her phone. She would send him a text right now letting him know how she felt. She didn’t want to give herself another chance to fall prey to his charms.

Luke, since you aren’t interested in answering my calls or texts, or in explaining what kind of ‘emergency’ you had to deal with last night, I’m not interested in giving you a raincheck for our date. Go find someone else to play your games with.

River felt a pang of regret as soon as she hit send on the text. Maybe she should have listened to Colleen and given Luke a chance to explain. But it was too late now, and River set her jaw in a stubborn line as she climbed out of her Jeep and headed up to her third floor apartment. Whatever Luke’s reason for missing their date, it didn’t matter anymore. She had better things to do than worry about a man who was all wrong for her.

Just over seventy-two hours after leaving the pub to respond to his alpha’s emergency call, Luke finally arrived back at Base with the rest of his crew. The Burning Claws Smokejumpers lived in a large airplane hangar with a large bunkhouse and shower house attached. The bunkhouse had been built to house a crew of twenty-five people, so the six member smokejumper crew had more than enough space. Even with Hunter’s lifemate, Riley, living on base now, everyone had room to stretch out and be comfortable.

And after picking up his cell phone from his bunk, Luke definitely wanted some space.

The messages had started off casual enough. River hoped everything was okay, and asked him to call her when he got a chance. There was a gap overnight where she didn’t call or text, but early the next morning she had texted again, worried that she still hadn’t heard from him. There were two more texts that each had a slightly more aggressive tone, and then a long stretch of silence before a final, angry text. As Luke had feared, River didn’t understand why he had suddenly disappeared with no response.

Luke stepped into one of the shower stalls to wash off the sweat and grime of three days in a smoky forest. As he rubbed a bar of soap across his dirty skin, he tried to figure out the best way to respond to River. The cynical part of him said to just let the whole thing go and forget about River. He’d had enough trouble with women to last him a lifetime, and the way things had played out with River the last few days, it looked like trying to date her was just asking for more trouble.

But something deep within Luke stirred every time he thought of River. He knew she was different. He knew his bear wanted her. He had to find a way to convince her to listen to his apology. Luke turned his back to the showerhead, and let the warm stream of water run down his body. He tried to come up with a romantic way to show her that he did care about her and that the last thing he had wanted to do was disappear right before their date. But romantic creativity wasn’t exactly Luke’s strong suit. He had brought a dozen red roses to the bar the other night, which he knew had screamed “cliché,” but it had been the only thing he could think of to do. Now, he worried that he would only mess up any attempt at romance, and make things worse than they already were.

Luke washed away the final traces of soap residue, and decided that the best option available to him would be to simply call River and explain things. Surely, if he just explained to her what had happened, she would understand. He should have tried to explain better from the beginning, but he couldn’t change that now. He would try to reschedule their date and get things back on the right foot.

Luke stepped out of the shower and toweled off, wincing a bit as his sore muscles protested against the vigorous movement. After several slow weeks with no fires, the last three days of chopping down trees and hauling heavy gear had really taken it out of him. He gingerly pulled a gray t-shirt over his head, and then threw on some loose black sweatpants. He went back to his bunk to grab his cell phone, not bothering to put on any shoes before he went outside and sat on top of the picnic table behind the hangar, using the table’s benches as a footrest.

He glanced at the time on his phone, and debated whether to make the call now. It was already 9:45 p.m., which, in polite society, was too late to call. But Luke didn’t want to wait another twelve hours to call River. He knew she would still be awake, and he had to talk to her now. He had to hear her voice and let her know that his leaving the bar early a few days ago had nothing to do with her or how he felt about her.

Luke took a deep breath and dialed back the number River had been using to call and text him. It rang several times, and just when Luke thought the call was going to go to voicemail, River picked up.

“Hello?” she said. Her voice made it clear that she did not feel like talking to him.

“River, hey, it’s Luke.”

“I know,” River said flatly.

Luke took a deep breath. Just explain things calmly, he told himself. “Look, I feel awful about missing out on our date. I know you’re angry, and you have a right to be. I should have explained better what happened, but I was in a rush and sort of panicked.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me. It’s obvious I made a mistake in agreeing to go get a drink with you in the first place. I’m sure you have your reasons for disappearing, and then not returning my phone calls right away. But I don’t really care what they are. This situation made me realize that I have very specific things I want in a relationship, and I shouldn’t settle for a man who doesn’t meet those things. And I definitely shouldn’t settle for a one night stand.”

“Is that what you think this was about? A one night stand?” Luke asked, his voice incredulous. He hadn’t intended to give River that impression at all. His romance skills must be even worse than he thought.

“Oh come on,” River said. “Don’t act like you weren’t after getting me in bed.”

“I’m not gonna lie, River. I think you’re beautiful, and I’m very attracted to you. But I want a chance to get to know you as a person. All of you. It’s been a long time since I’ve opened my heart up to someone, but you seemed like you were worth taking a chance on.”

“I’m sorry,” River said. “I just don’t think we have that much in common, and being out of contact with you for three days with no idea what was going on made me realize that I need to be more careful about agreeing to dates. I’m not the kind of person who appreciates someone disappearing for three days with no contact. I mean, how big of an emergency could it have been that you didn’t have time to at least drop me a text?”

“It was a pretty big emergency. I’m a firefighter. The kind of firefighter who parachutes into wildfires that are too remote to reach by car or foot. We don’t take our phones with us on jumps, since we’re already loaded down with gear, and there usually isn’t much of a cell signal out in the wilderness, anyway.”

River was silent for several long moments, and Luke held his breath, hoping that she was reconsidering her decision to not give him another chance. But, when she finally spoke, her voice still sounded disapproving. “I’m sorry, Luke. I guess I can see that a wildfire is a big, days-long emergency. But the time with no contact still made me realize that we’re not right for each other.”

Luke’s heart dropped. “How can you say that? You barely know anything about me. You haven’t even given me a chance.”

“I’m sorry,” River said. “You just don’t seem like my type. No hard feelings, okay?”

Then the line went dead. Luke threw his phone across the grass, not even caring whether the screen cracked. That’s what he got for opening his heart up again. He should have never let himself care about someone, especially someone as beautiful and smart as River. He let out a growl as he felt his bear stirring within him. His bear wanted River, but the odds of that happening looked pretty low at the moment. Luke felt his eyes welling up with emotion. He had started to let himself care deeply for River, and now he was paying for his mistake.

“Luke?” a soft voice called from behind him. He turned around and saw Riley, Hunter’s lifemate, walking toward him cautiously.

“Hey, Riley,” Luke said, trying to casually blink away the tears that had been forming in his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Riley asked.

“Nothing,” Luke said, avoiding Riley’s gaze. He saw Riley out of the corner of his eyes, crossing her arms.

“Really? Because you were almost yelling into your phone, and then you threw it across the lawn. That didn’t look like ‘nothing’. Is this about River?”

“Why would it be about River?”

“Hunter told me you were worried she wasn’t going to understand that you had to suddenly leave for a wildfire emergency.”

“Well, my worries weren’t for nothing. She’s refusing to go out with me again, and said the whole thing made her realize how we’re not right for each other. Which seems ridiculous to me, because she doesn’t even know me that well. I did tell her when I first met her that I’m not much into reading, and she seems to have really latched onto that statement. Apparently, since I’m not a total book lover like her, we have nothing in common.”

Riley laughed, and hopped up onto the picnic table to sit next to Luke. “I’ve been getting to know River pretty well over the last few weeks. She comes into the pie shop a lot to get stuff for her book clubs. She’s a really sweet person, but she has a lot of rules when it comes to men. I get the feeling that she was hurt before and is overly cautious now.”

“Well, I’m glad you find it amusing,” Luke said bitterly.

“I’m not trying to make light of the situation,” Riley said. “I only told you that to say that I wouldn’t give up hope on River yet. She thinks most men are assholes. I won’t comment on whether I agree with her or not, but if you really want her to take a gamble on you, then you’ll have to find a way to convince her that you’re not one of the bad apples.”

“How am I supposed to do that when she doesn’t even want to talk to me?” Luke asked.

Riley gave Luke’s shoulder a squeeze. “If you want a chance with her badly enough, you’ll find a way. And, for the record, I think you two would be great together, if you could just get past the fear you both have of being hurt.”

“How do you know I’m afraid of being hurt?” Luke said.

“Hunter told me about your ex, Sara. All I have to say about that is that it would be a shame if you let Sara continue to hold you back from love and happiness, years after she left your life. Don’t lose out on what’s right in front of you because you’re still so upset about what you left behind.”

Riley gave Luke’s shoulder one more friendly squeeze, and then hopped off the picnic table and headed back to the hangar. Luke stared up at the hazy night sky, and tried to figure out what to do.

He had let fear of being hurt keep him unhappy for too long. He needed to figure out a way to reach past the walls around River’s heart. But how? What would prove to her that he was worth the risk?

River’s observation that they didn’t know much about each other was correct. But Luke at least knew that she loved reading. Maybe if he found a way to show her that he didn’t hate books, River would see that he was serious about her and give him second shot.

He had to at least try.

October gave way to November, and River still hadn’t heard anything from Luke. She didn’t know why she was so disappointed, when she had made it so clear to him that she wasn’t interested. But some small part of her had hoped that he wouldn’t give up so easily. That he would have fought to prove to her that he meant it when he said he wanted more than just a one night stand.

But as the hours and then days ticked by, River finally accepted that Luke wasn’t going to come riding in on a white horse, declaring his love for her and begging her to see that his heart was just as gorgeous as his face. River fell back into her normal routine, working her shifts at the library and managing her book clubs. The afternoon before her romance book club was set to meet again, she went to pick up her usual assortment of pies from The Sweet Crust.

She wasn’t sure if she was relieved or disappointed when she walked into the pie shop and the only person there was Riley. River had no idea what she would say to Luke if she saw him, but she couldn’t manage to completely push his face from her mind.

“Hey, River,” Riley greeted her. “Give me just a second, and I’ll go grab your pies for you. Feel free to grab some coffee while you wait. You know where the cups are.”

River usually didn’t take Riley up on her offer of coffee, but there was a chill in the air today. A warm beverage might be a nice way to take the edge off. Besides, she wouldn’t mind an excuse to hang around and chat with Riley for a minute. River knew that Riley and Luke were friends, and she wondered if he had mentioned anything about her. As River filled a paper cup with coffee from the large thermos at the coffee bar, she tried to come up with a casual way to ask Riley about Luke.

“Here’s the first three,” Riley said, setting down three boxes of pies on the counter. “I’ll be right back with the rest.”

River stirred creamer into her coffee and glanced sadly at the three boxes. The fact that Luke wasn’t there to help her carry them out struck an unexpected chord of sadness with her. She took a deep breath and blew on her coffee to cool it down, telling herself to get a grip.

“What’s wrong?” Riley asked, as she returned with the last two boxes.

“Nothing,” River said, staring down at her coffee, pretending to be very interested in blowing cool air onto the hot liquid.

Riley narrowed her eyes. “Your expression looks pretty unhappy. Are you sure nothing’s wrong?”

River shrugged. “I’m okay. I just have a lot on my mind.”

“Sit down,” Riley said, gesturing to one of the small tables near the coffee bar. “Spill.”

“I don’t want to keep you from your work,” River protested.

“What work? It’s slow as molasses in here today. Sit down and tell me what’s bothering you.”

River reluctantly sat down, trying to decide how much to tell Riley.

“So, you’re friends with that guy Luke that comes in here sometimes, right?”

Riley chuckled. “Yes, I’m very good friends with him, actually. His best friend Hunter is essentially my fiancé.”

“Oh, wow. I had no idea.”

“Yeah, Luke’s always in here trying to get the ‘best friend’ discount on pie,” Riley said with a grin.

“Maybe I shouldn’t say anything, then, if you’re good friends with Luke.”

“I’m good friends with you, too,” Riley said gently. “You’re in here all the time, and we’ve had a lot of fun conversations. If you want to talk about Luke, I’m happy to keep whatever you want to say between you and me. Pinky promise!”

Riley held out her pinky, and River half heartedly linked her own pinky with Riley’s.

“It’s kind of complicated,” River said, unsure of where to start.

“Love usually is.”

“Hey, easy. No one said anything about love,”

Riley shrugged. “Call it whatever you want. But you two both obviously have some sort of feelings for each other. I know about the whole thing where he missed your drink date, by the way.”

“He told you about that?”

“Yup. He was pretty upset that it happened.”

“So, was it true, then? That he got called for an emergency.”

Riley nodded. “I think he could have handled it better, and given you a better explanation before just disappearing for three days like that. But he did get called to a wildfire pretty unexpectedly. The fire season is nearly over, so the crew doesn’t get many calls. In the middle of the summer, they were almost constantly gone. Now it’s once every other week or so. Hunter says pretty soon they’ll be done until next fire season. But I guarantee you that Luke didn’t expect an emergency call that night. And it’s true what he told you about not taking his phone on the job. None of the guys take their cell phones with them.”

River took a long, slow sip from her coffee. “Maybe I overreacted a little bit. I’m just so used to being treated horribly by guys like Luke.”

“What do you mean, ‘guys like Luke’?” Riley asked.

“You know, guys who look amazing and can get any girl they want. They’re usually assholes who are only after one thing, and don’t bother to give you the time of day after they get it.”

Riley shook her head. “Luke’s not like that. He’s definitely good-looking, but he’s not an asshole. He’s actually really sweet once you get to know him.”

“So you think I should give him another chance? Do you think he’s still interested in me now, anyway?”

Riley tilted her head sideways. “I can’t tell you what to do, and I can’t speak for Luke. But I’m willing to bet that if you two can find a way to give each other a chance, you have a good shot at finding happiness together.”

River stared down at her coffee without speaking. She felt more foolish than ever about treating Luke so harshly. Maybe she needed to consider getting rid of her strict rules and admit that every handsome guy she met wasn’t, in fact, an asshole.

Riley seemed to sense that River needed time to process everything. “Just think about it, River. Don’t put pressure on yourself to do something you don’t want to do, but don’t give up a shot at happiness because you’re scared of being hurt. There
are
some good guys out there.”

River nodded, then sighed wearily as she stood. “Okay. I’ll think about it. Right now I’ve got to get going to get everything set up for book club, though.”

“Is tonight romance or fantasy fiction?” Riley asked, standing up as well.

“Romance,” River said, then gave Riley a rueful smile. “I’m not sure I want to sit through a long discussion of a romantic hero at the moment, but duty calls.”

Riley smiled back at River. “You’ll be fine. Treat yourself to an extra slice of pie tonight. Here, I’ll help you carry them out, since your knight in shining armor isn’t around today.”

Riley grabbed a few of the boxes and followed River out to the Jeep. After giving Riley a quick hug and thanking her, River headed for the library. She eyed the sky suspiciously as she unloaded the first few boxes of pies and took them inside. Dark, angry storm clouds were gathering, threatening to let loose a torrent of rain. River quickly ran back to get the second round of pies, and got inside just as the skies opened. Thunder, lightning, and violent winds joined with a huge downpour of rain to create one of the worst thunderstorms that River had seen in a long time.

She thought that a storm of that intensity wouldn’t last long, but it continued for over an hour. As the clock ticked closer to the time that the book club was scheduled to start, River’s phone started lighting up with texts. One by one, the members of the book club all said they weren’t going to make it that night, due to the weather. River sat in the library alone, feeling dejected and staring at five boxes of pies. What in the world was she going to do with so much pie?

The rain continued, but finally slowed from a violent storm into a soft, steady shower. River opened the box of key lime pie and cut herself a generous slice. She slowly munched on the sweet, tart confection as she watched the rain sliding down the large front windows of the library. She could have just gone home, but something about being in the library alone in the middle of a rainstorm felt cozy and safe. She inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of the hundreds of books that lined the shelves behind her. The moment felt peaceful, and for the first time in several weeks, she felt truly happy. Even if her life wasn’t a shining example of having all your shit together, at least she had a decent job and a few good friends. What more could you ask for, really?

As River shoved another bite of pie into her mouth, she saw blurry headlights pulling into the parking lot. She frowned and walked to the window, trying to make out whose car had just arrived. Everyone in the book club had said they weren’t coming, and it was now thirty minutes past the start time. It would be weird for anyone to show up at this point. And the library was clearly closed. All of the lights were out.

Suddenly, River went from feeling cozy to feeling creeped out at being alone in a dark building filled with nothing but books. Maybe someone was just returning books to the book drop, but the middle of a rainstorm seemed like an odd time to do that. She pressed her face up against the window, trying to see what kind of vehicle had driven into the parking lot. It looked like some sort of large SUV.

The SUV parked right next to River’s Jeep, and the lights turned off a moment later. In the dim light of the streetlights, River saw a tall figure get out in the middle of the pouring rain. Even though the light was awful, River knew right away that it was Luke. Something deep inside of her reacted to the sight of him. Like a magnet, she felt her heart drawn to him. Without stopping to think, she ran to the front door of the library and out into the rain, where Luke was standing and staring at the library, probably trying to figure out if anyone was actually in there.

“Luke!” River shouted, as the cold November rain hit her skin. He turned his intense gaze to look at her, and River started running toward him. Her hair which she had pulled back into a messy bun, turned frizzy almost instantly. Loose tendrils curled up into ringlets around her face. Her thick, red sweater and black leggings soaked through to her skin as she jumped into Luke’s arms. He was more soaked then she was. His hair was spiking out in a hundred different directions, and his light blue button down shirt was plastered to his skin.

“River,” Luke said, taking her cheeks in his hands as she ran up to him. River felt warmth shooting out of Luke’s hands and flooding her body. She had always thought people were exaggerating when they said they had that kind of chemistry with someone, but Luke affected her in a way no one ever had before.

“I’m so sorry,” River said. “I acted like such an idiot. I should have been more understanding. There you are, working so hard and risking your life to protect the beautiful forests around here, and I’m mad because you had to cancel a silly date for a drink.”

Luke blinked away the small streams of water that were running down his face. River had never seen eyes that looked so warm and inviting. What had she been thinking, labeling him an asshole? Riley was right—underneath Luke’s gorgeous exterior was a sweet, sensitive man.

“River, I’m the one who’s sorry. I should have explained things better. I’m such a blundering idiot when it comes to this kind of stuff. I didn’t mean to hurt you, or make you think that I didn’t care enough about you to get back to you.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” River said. “You were right. I judged you and decided we didn’t have anything in common before I even knew you.”

Luke blinked rapidly again. River couldn’t be sure, but it looked almost like he was blinking away tears in addition to rainwater.

“I made you something,” he said. “I came here to beg you again to forgive me, and to give me a chance to show you that we are compatible. Or, at least, that we have a chance at being compatible. I wanted to put some time and effort into proving that to you, so I made you something. Come here.” Luke reached out and grabbed River’s hand pulling her toward the rear of the SUV. His hand was rough, but strong and warm. River tried to memorize the way it felt against her palm.

When they got to the back of the vehicle, Luke fumbled with the lift gate until he managed to open it.

“Sorry,” he said as he pushed the gate upward. “This isn’t my car, actually. I borrowed it from my buddy, Trevor, because I needed the space to transport your gift.”

Curious, River looked into the back of the SUV. The middle seats were folded flat to make more room, and a large, wooden mass that appeared to be a bookshelf filled the interior space.

“A bookshelf?” River asked, running her finger gingerly across the smooth wood of the bottom shelf.

“Yes. I made it. I don’t think you can see from here, but I carved a river scene into the panel at the top.”

“You made this?” River’s voice sounded incredulous. She could only see a small portion of the shelf from her current vantage point, but she could already tell that the piece was beautiful. This obviously was not Luke’s first attempt at woodworking. His cheeks reddened in the dim streetlights, and he looked slightly embarrassed as he nodded.

“Yeah, I made it. I wanted to show you that you matter to me as a person. I might not be an avid reader like you, but I think it’s really cool that you love books. It’s important to have something that you’re passionate about. I thought about buying you a special book, but I don’t know what kind of stuff you like to read, or what you already have. And since I’m not much of a bookworm myself, trying to figure out which books were good enough to be special wasn’t an easy task. I decided to stick with something I know I’m good at, and put my woodworking skills to good use. I’m sure you already have many books that are special to you. Now you have somewhere special to store them.”