A Complicated Love (Complicated Love #1) (9 page)

I’m woken by my phone buzzing on my bedside table. It’s a text from Joshua.

Hey beautiful, even though I love being with you all day in the office, I’m giving you today off. Have a nice relaxing day and be ready for our date tonight. I’m really looking forward to it. See you at 7pm. xx

I stare at the screen with my mouth agape. He put two kisses at the end of his message. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I relax in bed, thinking about Joshua and how fast we are moving forward. I fall back asleep with a little grin gracing my lips.

I haven’t really seen Tracy much lately. Every time I’m at the apartment, she’s out and she never gets in until late. So when I eventually wake up after a wonderful lie in, I find Tracy is camped out in front of the television. I knew she was going to be living it up in London until she leaves. She got a week off work, so she’s been hitting the clubs hard. Tracy is leaving in two days and we’ve agreed to go to lunch together today, since I have so much time on my hands thanks to Joshua.

We pick a little café down the road that we absolutely love. We walk in and sit in a booth near the window. A young, pimpled, blond haired waiter comes over to take our order. Tracy orders a tuna pasta bake with a black coffee and I order a chicken salad wrap served with crisps and a glass of water. I’m trying to eat a bit healthier now with being pregnant. The waiter takes our menus and goes to check in our order.

“Black coffee, huh? Hangover I think,” I giggle while Tracy groans.

“Okay, okay, don’t start. My head is banging,” she groans and hangs her head.

“I’m not surprised with the amount of times you have been out in the past week.”

“Yea well, I’m getting it in before I have to start work in Los Angeles. I’m going to be really busy for a while. Thanks Mum for the scolding.” She giggles and looks over at me with a smirk on her face.

“So… going to tell me what’s going on with you and lover boy?”

“I actually have something to tell you.” I smile and suddenly Tracy gasps.

“Oh my God, you are so doing him. I knew it! I may have not been around, but when he rocked up at our apartment, I felt the chemistry. Never thought you had it in you, doing the boss.” She throws her head back and laughs.

“Tracy stop, saying… ” I pause what I’m saying as I see the blond waiter walking toward me. He places our drinks and lunch on the table and then leaves.

“Doing the boss,” I whisper. “It’s not like that, and I’m not doing him as you so elegantly put it. I do have something to tell you though.”

Tracy eyes me suspiciously. “Okay… spill it.” She takes a gulp of her coffee.

“I’m pregnant.”

Tracy spews coffee all over the table and floor. Her mouth is agape as she looks at me in shock. “Pregnant? As in having a baby? Pregnant?”

I laugh. Yep, she’s definitely shocked.

“Yes, and Joshua is the father.”

“Joshua, as in Joshua Lynn. Your boss?” She takes another gulp of her coffee as she digests what I’ve just told her. I grab some tissues to clean up the spilt coffee. I nod my head as I tuck into my chicken salad wrap.
It’s bloody delicious
. She’s silent for a while as she eats her tuna pasta bake. After she’s eaten half, she looks at me and smiles.

“I can’t believe it… you… pregnant! You’re going to have a baby. When did this
‘thing’
happen with you and Joshua?”

“It was the night we saw him at that new nightclub’s opening. He walked me back to our apartment and it just happened.”

“Is there a… you and Joshua?”

I knew she was going to ask and to be honest I don’t know what to say.

“Truthfully, I would like there to be, but I hardly know him. I don’t know how he feels. I think he wants something though, he did ask me out tonight. We are going on our first date together.”

“How exciting, I’m happy for you Annabelle. I wish I was staying. I’m giving you more things to worry about with the apartment,” she says looking guilty.

“Hey, it’s not your fault. You’re following your dreams. I will be fine, don’t worry. I’ll work something out.” I scoot round the booth to sit beside Tracy.

“I’m going to miss you, so much.” I chew on my lip to stop myself from crying.

“I will miss you too. I’m only a phone call away, don’t forget that.” She gives me a bone crushing hug, then she pulls back and wipes her eyes that have filled with tears.

“This is stupid, let’s go out tomorrow night. Just you and me as a sort of leaving do?” She bounces in her seat, looking at me with pleading eyes.

“Fine.” I smile. “I have my ultrasound tomorrow afternoon, but then I’m all yours in the evening.”

“Yay! Right, I better go and get some packing done. I haven’t done anything yet.” She slips out of the booth and gathers her stuff.

“I’ll walk with you. I have to start getting ready for my date.” I collect my things, pay the cashier before linking arms with Tracy.

“I wonder where he’s taking you? I bet it’s romantic. He seems the romantic type,” she says in a dreamlike state.

“I have no idea what he has planned, but I can’t wait to find out.” I giggle while we walk back to our apartment trying to guess what Joshua has planned for the evening.

I’m really nervous about this date.

Why?
It’s Joshua.

I want more with him definitely, but I keep having a nagging feeling in the back of my mind. I keep thinking that maybe he’s only here because of the baby. I can’t help feeling that maybe he doesn’t really want me.
How can I ever fully know?
It’s stupid to think this, but I can’t seem to help it. Sometimes it feels like everything is moving too fast. I finish putting my earrings in and look at myself in the mirror. I’m not usually a dress girl, but I found one that I wore once and shoved to the back of my wardrobe. It’s a purple, satin dress which ends just above the knee. It has a halter neck top, decorated with little diamantes. The back of the dress is open and the dress begins just above my bottom. I wasn’t sure if it was too flashy, but he hasn’t told me where we’re going. I put on a pair of black strappy heels that I can only barely walk in, because I think flats won’t complete the look. A white gold bracelet and matching earrings complement my outfit. Don’t forget my black and white diamante clutch bag. I’ve piled my hair into a bun with a few wavy strands hanging down the sides of my face and put a little bit of makeup on.

I have to admit, I look hot and I hope Joshua likes. I put my phone, lippy and purse into my bag and head to the living room. Tracy isn’t here again tonight. She said she was going to start her packing, but didn’t make it too far. There’s a knock on the door. I rush back to my bedroom and check myself in the mirror before walking back to open the door. Joshua is looking gorgeous. He’s wearing tan coloured jeans with a white shirt tucked into his jeans.
He seems to love white shirts.
He’s wearing a pair of black shoes and his gorgeous black hair is gelled and slicked back. He looks
hot!
No one has spoken since the door was opened, but we’ve both been ogling one another.

“
Wow
… Annabelle, you look… beautiful.” He’s making me nervous under his scrutiny. He’s studying every inch of me from head to toe while smiling a wide grin, then he offers me his hand. “Shall we?” I nod and take his outstretched hand. I can’t seem to find my voice.

We park up at the Embankment Pier and I see some sort of long boat docked. I’ve read about these dinner cruises down the river Thames and always wanted to try it. We walk to the boat and I spot the name Harmony on the side. It’s a large boat with glass windows all the way around. Joshua helps me onboard and we are greeted by a woman who is impeccably dressed in a grey suit with a white blouse peeking out of the suit jacket.

“Good evening sir and madam, may I take your last name, please?” She’s very polite.

“Yes certainly, the booking’s under Lynn.” Joshua glances at me and winks. My heart starts fluttering and I suddenly feel rather hot. The things he does to me with one simple look or touch is explosive.

“Please follow me.” Joshua takes my hand and follows the woman to a private table overlooking the river. Then again they all do. I giggle to myself as Joshua pulls my seat out for me to sit. We settle in our seats and a young male waiter heads over to our table with two wine glasses. He presents a bottle of sparkling Kir to Joshua, which Joshua accepts. He pours himself a glass and addresses the waiter.

“Could I have a sparkling water for my beautiful girl, please?” I grin widely.

He called me his girl!
I’m doing happy dances inside.

“Yes sir.” The waiter comes back minutes later with my sparkling water.

The boat sets off and we glide down the river Thames. It’s growing dark outside and it looks really pretty with all the lights from the buildings and the London Eye is sparkling high in the sky. The waiter appears and takes our orders.

For starters, we both have cured Scottish salmon, apple ‘three ways’ and horseradish dressing. It sounds really weird, but I don’t let on to Joshua. For mains, I have the breast of Sussex chicken with potato and celeriac dauphinoise served with curly kale, crispy skin and rosemary jus. Joshua ordered the fillet of Scottish hake with crab and mascarpone ravioli served with braised pak choi, caper and lemon sauce. We both have triple chocolate parfait with a lime curd heart and pickled figs. The meal was beautiful and, after all that food, I’m totally full. I didn’t know what half of it was, but it was all delicious. A jazz band played throughout the meal and it was beautiful. This is the most romantic date I’ve ever been on. We didn’t speak much while eating our meal, but there was a lot of casual glances and smiles shared between us.

“The meal was delicious and this cruise is amazing.” I can’t help the excitement.

He chuckles. “I’m glad you like it. I wanted to do something for you and show you that even though we haven’t known each other for long, I care about you and want you and our baby in my life.” He places his hand on top of mine on the table.

“I want to get to know you, and I want to give us a go. A proper go, as a couple.” He smiles and keeps his eyes locked on me. I blush.

“I would like that too, Joshua, so much.” I entwine our fingers on the table and play with his fingers. Joshua can’t help but rub his thumb on mine.

Joshua and I talk for ages, sharing with each other our pasts. He tells me about his dad and his accident. It’s hard hearing it from Joshua. I tell him about my parents and how much I miss them. He looks at me with concern throughout my story. I always hate telling anyone, but I plough through because I want to know as much as I can about him as well. I smile when I tell him about Aunt Sylvia and Tracy, and Joshua does the same when he tells me about his mum and his little sister Danielle. He wants me to meet them, but I don’t think I’m quite up for that yet. I mention to him about Tracy leaving in a couple of days and about my apartment.

“So, I’m going to have to look for something else.” I take a sip of my water while Joshua looks deep in thought.

“What about if I pay Tracy’s rent until you find something else?”

“That’s very kind of you, but Tracy said she will do that while I sort something out. I’m sure I can find something a bit smaller that I’ll be able to afford.” I fiddle with my glass.

“Well, let me know if there’s anything I can do.” He smiles and pushes his chair back. I noticed that the band has livened up a bit and people are dancing. Joshua stands by my chair and offers me his hand.

“Would you like to dance?” I take his hand and he guides me out onto the dance floor where I wrap my arms around his neck. He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me flush up against his body. We dance in perfect rhythm together. He really knows how to move. He smells so good tonight, a mixture of citrus fruit subtly flows around me. He guides me around the dance floor perfectly. I feel his breath on my neck as he buries his head in the crease of my shoulder.

This has been the perfect day with the perfect man. I never thought my life would end up like this. He glides sweet kisses from my collarbone and along my jaw. He places two little kisses, one on both sides of my mouth before brushing my lips. The kiss is gentle and full of promises. Before long Joshua pulls back and gives me a quick peck on the lips. He takes my hand and walks me out onto the back deck. It’s a bit chilly out, so Joshua drapes his jacket over my shoulders. I walk up to the railing and gaze out over the river Thames. It really is beautiful out here. A pair of strong, muscular arms wrap around me and pull me back against a solid, hard chest. Joshua chuckles when I gasp. We stand like that for ages, watching The Millennium Bridge, London Bridge and The Tower of London go by. I don’t want this night to end. It really has been amazing.

Joshua pulls up outside my apartment after a fantastic night. He helps me out of the car and walks me to my door. I have butterflies that have taken flight in my stomach, thinking of how this night will end. He takes my face in his hands and gives me an intense, firm kiss. I glide my arms up his chest and wrap them around his neck. His tongue probes my lips to open, and I can’t help but comply. He massages his tongue with mine as the kiss becomes heavier and more frenzied. Before long Joshua breaks the kiss. I look into his eyes and all I see is desire.

“Do you want to come in?” I stroke his chest while gazing into his eyes. I’m trying to be seductive, but I’m not sure I’m pulling it off.

He sighs and runs his hands down his face.

“Annabelle, I want to. Believe me I do, but I can’t.” I frown at his admission. “I want to take this slow. I don’t want to rush this between us.” He scratches his neck, looking uncomfortable before jumping in his car and driving away. I unlock my door and walk into an empty apartment again. I kick my heels off and head straight to the freezer to find my comfort. My ‘
Ben and Jerry’s.
’

I don’t understand what happened?

Everything was going great until I invited him in. I know he wants to take it slow and I get that, but I can’t help sulking. My phone buzzes from inside my bag, so I grab it before plonking myself down on the sofa. It’s a text from Joshua.

I’m sorry for leaving so quickly beautiful. If I’d stayed too much longer, I would have swept you up into my arms, taken you to your bedroom and made love to you slowly, just like I’ve pictured doing so many times tonight. I meant what I said, I want to be with you, but I want to go slowly with you and appreciate you. You are going to take tomorrow off as well and I will pick you up for the ultrasound around 10am tomorrow morning. Sleep well, beautiful x

He is truly unbelievable sometimes. He said,
‘made love.’
He actually said it, and I’m in shock right now.