“You seem to be having a hard time keeping your mind on the job at hand,” Pop said, nudging Wayne’s arm. “Are you bored with working on animal skins?”
Wayne shook his head. “Not really. I thought I’d hate it at first, but after working here awhile, I realize it’s not so bad.”
Pop’s face broke into a wide smile. “I’m real happy to hear that. Someday, when I’m too old to do this anymore, maybe you can take over the business.”
Wayne shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know about that. I’ve been thinking I might want to do something else.”
Pop’s eyebrows furrowed. “Are you still wishing you could farm? Because if you are, and you think you’re up to it, I can let you have a few acres of land and see how it goes.”
Wayne shook his head. “I’m thinking I might want to move to Arthur, Illinois, and stay with Uncle Ezra and Aunt Evelyn awhile. Maybe Uncle Ezra would be willing to teach me something about the woodworking trade.”
Pop’s mouth formed an O. “I had no idea you were thinking of leaving home. I thought you were happy here.”
Wayne gripped the piece of deer hide in his hands so hard his fingers began to ache. “Happy? Pop, I haven’t been happy since I lost my leg!”
“You need to give it more time, son. Healing, emotionally and physically—that’s gonna take some time.”
“That’s why I want to move away and leave all the memories behind.”
“What about your leg? Don’t you think you need to stay close to your doctors until it’s sufficiently healed?”
“I’m sure there are plenty of good doctors in Illinois who can take over my case.”
Pop dropped the piece of deer hide he’d been working on onto the workbench and massaged the bridge of his nose. “You can’t run from your past, son. It won’t solve a thing.”
“I wouldn’t be running. I just need a fresh start.”
“What about Loraine and your plans to be married? Have you spoken to her about the idea of moving to Illinois?”
Wayne shook his head. “I’ve told you this before, Pop—Loraine and I will not be getting married. She’s moving on with her life. In fact, she’ll be going out to supper with Jake this evening.”
Pop continued to rub his nose. “So that’s the reason you want to go away. You’re still in love with Loraine and can’t stand the thought of her seeing someone else.”
Wayne offered no reply.
“If you’re in love with her, then you shouldn’t let her go.” Pop made a sweeping gesture of the room. “If you keep working here with me, you can make enough money to support a wife. There’s no reason you and Loraine can’t be married like you’d planned.”
“Even if I could provide a decent living for a wife and family, I’ll always be handicapped, and I don’t want to be a burden.”
“I’m sure Loraine wouldn’t see being married to you as a burden. For goodness’ sake, Wayne, there are folks with worse handicaps than yours, and many have gotten married and lived a normal life.”
“There’s nothing
normal
about losing a leg.” Wayne couldn’t keep the bitterness from his tone. “Besides, Loraine doesn’t love me anymore. She used to love Jake before he went to Montana, and I’ve seen the way the two of them look at each other.” He slowly shook his head. “I won’t stand in the way of their happiness, and I won’t hold Loraine to her promise to marry me just because she feels sorry for me now. I’ve made up my mind to leave, and I plan to contact Uncle Ezra next week.”
Pop clasped both of Wayne’s shoulders and turned him so they were eye to eye. “I can’t keep you from going to Illinois, but I think it would be best if you waited until your mamm gets her cast off and is able to take over the cooking and household chores again.”
“Loraine and some of the others in our community are helping out. Mom doesn’t need me here for that.”
“That’s true, but your mamm’s been an emotional wreck ever since your accident, and breaking her leg has only added to her frustrations.” Pop blew out his breath as he whacked the edge of his workbench with his knuckles. “I think it would put her over the edge if you took off for Illinois right now.”
Wayne stared at the workbench, contemplating his father’s words. As much as he needed to get away, he didn’t want Mom to feel any worse than she already did. Pop was right; she hadn’t been the same since the accident. No one had, really.
“All right then, I’ll wait until Mom gets her cast off and is getting around well enough on her own, but then I’ll be heading for Illinois.”
“You won’t say anything about these plans to her now, I hope. It would really upset her, you know.”
Wayne shook his head. “For the time being, I’m not going to mention it to anyone else.”
Loraine peeked out the kitchen window, watching for Jake’s buggy to come into the yard. She could hardly believe she’d agreed to go out with him this evening. Would it be like old times, or would she feel stiff and uncomfortable eating supper with him at Tiffany’s? They used to go there a lot when they were dating—sometimes with other couples, sometimes just the two of them. Their times together had always been relaxed yet exciting. Back then, Loraine had believed that she and Jake would eventually marry. Now she wasn’t sure what she wanted or how she felt about much of anything.
Is going out with Jake tonight what I really want to do?
she asked herself.
Or am I only going out with him because Wayne wants me to? Why does Wayne want me to go out with Jake, anyway? Could he really have stopped loving me, or is he just feeling sorry for himself and thinking this is the best thing for me?
“Are you watching for Jake?” Mom asked, stepping up to Loraine.
“Jah, and I’m feeling a bit
naerfich
about going out with him this evening.”
Mom gave Loraine’s arm a gentle squeeze. “Don’t be nervous. Jake’s so pleasant and easygoing; I’m glad you’re seeing him again.”
“He is easy to be with, but I can’t forget the promise I made to Wayne.”
“He broke up with you, Loraine. That means you’re no longer bound by your promise.”
Loraine blinked against the tears that threatened to spill over. “Can we please change the subject? I’d rather not talk about this anymore.”
“Jah, sure. I need to get supper started for me and your daed anyway.” Mom went to the refrigerator.
“I think I’ll wait out on the porch for Jake,” Loraine said.
“Oh, okay. Have a good time, and tell him I said hello and to come by again soon for more pie and coffee.”
Loraine nodded, grabbed her jacket and bonnet, then scurried out the door. She’d no more than taken a seat on the porch swing when a horse and buggy rolled into the yard. Only it wasn’t Jake who climbed down from the buggy—it was Ella.
“I went over to the Lambrights’, thinking you’d be there,” Ella said when she stepped onto the porch. “I found Aunt Leah there, fixing supper for them instead.” She scowled at Loraine. “I was shocked when Ada said you weren’t there because you were having supper with Jake this evening.”
Loraine nodded. “That’s right. He’s taking me to Tiffany’s, and he should be here any minute.”
Ella grunted as she plopped down beside Loraine. “After the way Jake hurt you before, I don’t understand how you could even consider going out with him now.”
Loraine gripped the armrest of the swing, hoping to gain control of her emotions. It seemed that every time she spoke to Ella these days, they ended up in an argument over Jake.
Ella bumped Loraine’s arm. “Can you explain why you’ve ignored my advice and accepted a date with Jake?”
“I enjoy being with him. And he’s apologized for what he did.”
“Puh!” Ella’s nose crinkled as though some foul odor had permeated the air. “I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it once more, that fellow’s not to be trusted. How do you know he won’t run off again?”
“I don’t know that. There are no guarantees in this life.”
“What about Wayne? Does he know you’re going out with Jake?”
“Jah, he knows, and he seems to be perfectly fine with the idea.” Loraine blew out her breath. “In fact, he actually said I should go.”
“What?” Ella’s eyes widened. “You’ve got to be kidding!”
“No. Not only has Wayne said several times that it’s over between us, but the other day, he came right out and said he thought Jake and I should get back together.”
Ella sat several seconds, rubbing her chin and tapping her sneaker against the weathered porch floor. “I can’t believe it. It doesn’t make sense that Wayne would want you and Jake to get back together.”
“It makes sense if Wayne doesn’t love me anymore.” Loraine swallowed hard, hoping she wouldn’t break down in tears. “And he obviously doesn’t, or he wouldn’t be trying to push me and Jake together, now would he?”
“I don’t know. I mean—”
A horse whinnied, and Loraine turned to look toward the driveway. A buggy rolled in. The door on the driver’s side was open, and she could see Jake sitting inside with one foot hanging out the opening. He had always liked to ride in his buggy like that, even in colder weather.
She watched as he pulled alongside the barn, but instead of getting out and tying his horse to the rail, he just sat there.
“Jake’s here now, so I’d better go,” Loraine said, rising to her feet.
Ella jumped up from the swing. “Look at him—he’s just sitting there like a bump on a log. Isn’t he coming up to the house to get you?”
“Maybe he thinks there’s no need since I’m out here waiting for him.”
“That’s baremlich! If he wants to take you on a date, then the least he can do is come up to the house and get you.”
Loraine started off the porch, but Ella grabbed her arm. “Don’t you dare go out there!”
“Why not?”
“You’ll look overanxious, and it won’t teach Jake anything about proper manners.” Ella’s nose wrinkled. “That fellow is so into himself, which I just don’t understand, since it’s not the way he was raised!”
Irritation welled in Loraine’s soul as she looked Ella in the face. “I am not Jake’s mamm, and it’s not my place to teach him good manners. Besides, I think you’re wrong about Jake. He’s kind and helpful and not at all into himself.”
Ella’s eyes squinted into tiny slits. “If you go out there, I’ll never speak to you again!”
Loraine sighed. “Don’t be
lecherich.
When we were little girls and you didn’t get your way, you used to threaten not to speak to me. Don’t you think it’s time for you to grow up and stop trying to control every situation?”
Ella’s face flamed. “I’m not being ridiculous or trying to control every situation. I just care about you too much to stand by and watch you get hurt by the likes of him.” She stared across the yard, where Jake still sat in his buggy. “But if you want to ruin your life, then go ahead; don’t let me stop you.”
Loraine took a step forward, but halted. She didn’t want Ella to be mad at her, but at the same time she didn’t want to keep Jake waiting. Maybe if she didn’t rush out to his buggy, he would take the hint and come up to the house to get her. On the other hand, if she did go out to him, she’d never hear the end of it from Ella, even if she had threatened not to speak to her again.
Jake shifted on the buggy seat, trying to decide what to do. He wanted to go up to the house and see if Loraine was ready for their date, but with Ella standing there, it might be best to let Loraine come to him. The last time he’d talked to Ella, they’d ended up in an argument. He didn’t want to risk that again. At the same time, he didn’t want to offend Loraine. He’d worked too hard at gaining her trust to ruin things now.
Gathering up his courage, Jake hopped down from the buggy and started for the house.
When he stepped onto the porch, he smiled at Loraine and said, “Are you ready to head to Topeka?”
She smiled. “I’m more than ready.”
Jake glanced over at Ella and forced a smile. “Wie geht’s?” he asked.
“I’m doing fine. I was at the Lambrights’ and decided to stop by here and see Loraine for a few minutes before I went home.” She turned to Loraine and gave her arm a little squeeze. “Think about what I said, okay?”
Loraine gave a quick nod, stepped off the porch, and hurried toward Jake’s buggy. It made him wonder if she was as anxious to get away from Ella as he was. At least this time Ella hadn’t said anything mean to him.
He helped Loraine into his buggy and went around to untie the horse. When he climbed into the driver’s seat, he noticed Loraine looking over her shoulder with a worried expression.
“Is everything all right?” he asked.
She nodded. “I’m just worried about Ella. She’s been trying to be everything to everyone ever since her bruder died, but sometimes she’s just too pushy.”
“You won’t get any argument from me there.” Jake snapped the reins and directed his horse onto the main road. “Now, can we forget about Ella and concentrate on the two of us having a good time this evening?”
Loraine smiled. “That’s exactly what I plan to do.”
“The fried chicken here at Tiffany’s is sure good,” Loraine said, then took another bite and savored the delicious taste.
Jake smiled. “Jah, but not nearly as good as yours.”
Loraine’s cheeks warmed. “Danki.”
“I mean it, Loraine, you’re really a good cook. That bread you baked for Ada the other day was real tasty.”
“I think Ada must have liked it, too, because she ate most of one loaf.” Loraine’s eyebrows squeezed together. “Of course, she’d never say it was good or give me a compliment for anything. I’ve come to accept the fact that she’s probably never going to like me.”
“That’s too bad. I guess she doesn’t know when she’s met a good person.”
Loraine shrugged and forked some mashed potatoes into her mouth.
As they continued to eat their meal, Loraine listened with interest while Jake told her more about the horse ranch in Montana where he’d worked and how he’d purchased a couple of thoroughbred horses the other day and hoped to breed them.
“I’ve worked with horses ever since I was a buwe, and I’ve had the dream of owning my own business since I turned sixteen.” Jake leaned forward, his elbows resting on the table and a serious expression on his face. “That’s the reason I went to Montana—so I could make more money.”
“Money isn’t everything,” she said with a catch in her voice. “Being with family and friends—that’s what’s important.”
“I agree, but a fellow can’t provide for a wife and family if he doesn’t have enough money.”
“Weren’t you making a decent living working for your daed?”
Jake shook his head. “Not enough to save up much money. Besides, I don’t want to shoe horses for the rest of my life. It’s hard on the back and not nearly as much fun as training them.”
Loraine took another bite of chicken and washed it down with a swallow of water. “Your daed must enjoy shoeing horses. He’s been doing it for quite a few years.”
Jake nodded and swiped his napkin across his chin where some juice from the chicken had dribbled. “That doesn’t mean I want to follow in his footsteps.”
“Who’s going to take over the business when your daed retires?” “Maybe my younger brother Elmer. He’s only twelve, but he’s already taken an interest in helping Dad.” Jake reached for his glass of water and took a drink. “I just know it won’t be me takin’ over my daed’s business.”
“I guess if you don’t like it that well, then it’s not something you should do for the rest of your life.”
“How about you?” he asked. “Do you enjoy your job at the hardware store in Shipshewana?”
“I like it well enough, but it’s not something I’d want to do forever,” she replied.
Jake jiggled his eyebrows. “Nothing’s forever. Nothing here on earth, at least.”
“That’s true. We won’t know eternity until we get to heaven.”
Jake’s gaze shifted to the other side of the room. “Say, isn’t that Fern Bontrager sitting over there? I haven’t seen her in a good long while.”
“I don’t think so. Fern and her folks moved to Ohio a few months after you left for Montana, and they’ve not been back since.”
Jake continued to stare. “Sure does look like her. Same mousy blond hair and turned-up nose. Jah, that’s gotta be Fern.”
Loraine’s head snapped to the right, and her breath caught in her throat when she saw the young woman Jake was referring to.
“It’s her, isn’t it?”
Loraine nodded slowly. “I wonder what she’s doing here, and who’s that young man sitting with her?”
“Maybe she’s gotten married since she moved to Ohio.”
“Or maybe he’s a friend or a relative.”
“There’s only one way to find out. Let’s go over there and ask.” Before Loraine could respond, Jake pushed his chair away from the table and started across the room.
With a sigh of resignation, Loraine rose from her seat. The idea of talking to Wayne’s ex-girlfriend held no appeal, but it wouldn’t be right to remain at the table while Jake went over to say hello. Besides, Loraine was curious as to what had brought Fern back to Indiana.
By the time Loraine reached the table, Jake had already pulled out a chair and taken a seat next to the young man with a thick crop of sandy brown hair.
“Hello, Fern,” Loraine said, forcing a smile. “I’m surprised to see you here. I thought you were living in Ohio.”
“We have been, and my folks are still there, but I’ve been asked to teach the older grades at the schoolhouse where your cousin Jolene used to teach, so I’m moving back here.”
Loraine’s heart started to pound. “Y–you’re going to be teaching here now?”
“That’s right.” Fern motioned to the young man sitting across from her. “My brother Freeman came along to see about opening a bicycle shop here similar to our Uncle John’s bike shop, where he’s worked for the past several years.” She smiled at her brother. “Freeman misses Indiana and wants to get settled in here. Since our Grandma Sara is widowed and has plenty of room, we’ll be staying with her, at least for now.”
Jake thumped Freeman on the back. “Wow, you’ve sure grown up since I last saw you. I didn’t even realize it was you.”
“I’m almost twenty-two years old now,” Freeman said with a grin.
Fern motioned to the empty chair beside her. “Would you like to have a seat, Loraine?”
Loraine shifted uneasily, wishing Jake would say they ought to return to their table. He made no move to get up, however, because he was deeply engaged in conversation with Freeman.
Reluctantly, Loraine pulled out the chair and sat down. Other than the fact that she and Fern had both dated Wayne, they really had nothing in common. She didn’t have a clue what to talk about, either.
Fern seemed equally uncomfortable, as she fiddled with the fork beside her plate. “I ... uh ... heard about the accident you, Wayne, and the others were in. It must have been horrible for him, losing a leg like that.”
“Jah, it was quite a shock.”
“How’s Wayne getting along now?”
“As well as can be expected.” Loraine saw no need to tell Fern how depressed Wayne had been or that he’d called off their wedding. Since Fern was moving here, she would probably hear all about that soon enough anyway—especially if she talked to Ada.
I wonder how things will be once Ada finds out Fern’s moving back?
Loraine wondered.
It would be just like Ada to try and get Wayne and Fern together again. But then,
she reasoned,
if Wayne thinks he’s not capable of taking care of a wife and family, it’s not likely that he’d start going out with Fern—especially since he was the one to break up with her.
“I’ll try to get over and see Wayne sometime this week,” Fern said, scattering Loraine’s thoughts. “I’d like to see how he’s doing and offer a few encouraging words.”
“I’m sure he’d appreciate that.” Loraine looked over at Jake again, silently begging him to say that they needed to return to their table. If he didn’t say something soon, maybe she’d say it herself.
After what seemed like an eternity, Jake rose to his feet. “I guess Loraine and I should get back to our table before our food gets cold.” He smiled at Fern and her brother. “It’s been nice seeing you both. If you ever have a horse in need of some shoes, just give me or my daed a call.”
Jake glanced at Loraine out of the corner of his eye. She hadn’t said more than two words since they’d left Topeka. In fact, ever since their brief visit with Fern and her brother, Loraine had been quiet.
“It was sure strange seeing Fern again, wasn’t it?” he said, hoping to break the silence between them.
Loraine nodded.
“Her brother’s sure changed. I wouldn’t have recognized him if Fern hadn’t said his name.”
“Uh-huh.”
“While Freeman and I were gabbing, what’d you and Fern talk about?”
“Not much. Just said a few things about the accident.”
“It’s good that the school board’s found someone to take your cousin’s place, don’t you think?”
“I suppose, although the older scholars are doing okay with their temporary teacher, and I know from what I’ve heard that they really do miss Jolene.” Loraine sighed. “She was a good teacher, and it’s a shame she won’t be able to teach school again because of losing her hearing.”
“Maybe she’ll find something else to do—something that doesn’t require her to hear.”
“Jah, maybe so.”
“Getting back to Fern,” Jake said, “as I recall, she always had an easygoing way about her. Hopefully, she’ll get along well with her students.”
“Time will tell, I guess.”
“I overheard her say something to you about visiting Wayne. Are you bothered by that?”
Loraine shook her head. “Why should I be?”
“I just thought since he and Fern used to date that you might—”
“Wayne and I aren’t engaged anymore, so he can see whomever he pleases.”
Jake decided to drop the subject. From the responses Loraine had given, he figured she wasn’t too excited about Fern moving back, and he had a hunch she hadn’t gotten over Wayne yet, either. Could she be jealous of Wayne’s old girlfriend? Or could Loraine’s coolness toward Fern have something to do with the fact that she’d be taking over Jolene’s teaching position?
“Are you warm enough?” Jake asked. “Because if you’re not, there’s a buggy robe under the seat.”
“It is a little chilly.” She reached under the seat but came up empty-handed. “There’s no buggy robe there, Jake.”
He scratched the side of his head. “Maybe my mamm washed it and forgot to put it back. She said something about washing all the buggy robes the other day.” He patted the empty space beside him. “You could move closer to me if you’re cold. There’s nothing like a little body warmth to chase away the chill.”
Loraine didn’t make a move at first, but then to Jake’s surprise, she scooted a little closer. So close, in fact, that their shoulders touched.
Jake smiled. The warmth of her arm against his brought back memories of their courting days. They’d been so happy and carefree. It felt good to be out with her again—almost like old times. He wished the evening never had to end. He wished they could get back to where they’d once been. Well, given some time, maybe they could.
“Look at that starry sky.” Loraine pointed out the front window. “It almost seems as if the stars are hung on invisible threads.”
Jake nudged her arm gently. “Listen to you now. All those flowery words make you sound like a poet.”
She nudged him back. “For your information, I have written a few poems.”
“Oh, really? Why don’t you let me hear one of them?”
“Are you sure? I mean, some people aren’t interested in poetry.”
“Well, I’m not
some
people. I’m interested in any poem that was written by you.” Throwing caution to the wind, Jake reached for her hand and was pleased when she didn’t pull it away.
“All right then...” Loraine cleared her throat. “My poem goes like this:
Jake gently squeezed Loraine’s fingers. “That was really good. I think you have a talent for making up poems.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “Maybe you ought to quit your job at the hardware store and become a poet.”
She snickered. “Jah, right.”
“No, I mean it, Loraine. You ought to at least try to get some of your poems published.”
She shook her head. “I’m not interested in that. I only write poems when the mood hits, and I doubt that anything I’ve written would be considered good enough to publish.”
“You’ll never know unless you try. Want me to check at the library and see if there’s any information available about where you could send your poems?”
She shook her head. “I appreciate the offer, but I think not.”
He shrugged. “If you change your mind let me know.”
They rode in silence the rest of the way home, but Jake found that words weren’t needed when he was with Loraine. It felt so natural and pleasant, sitting here beside her like they were meant to be together.
“I wish I’d thought to bring my harmonica along,” he said, breaking the silence. “It would have been fun to play it on the drive home.”
“You’ll have to bring it next time,” she said.
He nodded.
Next time. Why did that sound so good?
“I had a nice time tonight. Danki for inviting me to have supper with you, Jake.” Tenderness laced Loraine’s words like a soft blanket against rough, calloused skin.
“You’re welcome; I had a good time, too.”
Jake smiled to himself. If Loraine’s response on this drive home was any indication of how she felt toward him, then he was confident that they were making some headway toward getting back together. The expression he’d seen on her face during supper and the way she’d listened so intently to his description of Montana and life on the horse ranch had made him think she still cared for him, too. She’d seemed happy and relaxed while they were eating—at least until they’d talked to Fern and her brother.
Jake guided his horse and buggy up the driveway leading to her place and stopped it on the side of the barn, facing the pasture, where he knew they couldn’t be seen from the house.
His stomach lurched with nervous anticipation as he slid his hand under Loraine’s chin. Should he tell her about Roxanne, and how they’d almost become engaged? Was there any reason she needed to know? Pushing the thought aside, he slowly lowered his head and captured Loraine’s lips with a kiss that stole his breath away.
She leaned closer and placed both hands around his neck.
Caught up in the moment, he moaned and deepened the kiss.
With a sudden gasp, she pulled away, trembling like a blade of grass shaken by the wind. “I’d better go.” Without waiting for Jake’s reply, she hopped out of the buggy and made a beeline for the house.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have done it,” Jake mumbled. “I hope that kiss won’t keep Loraine from going out with me again.”