A Dirty Death (14 page)

Carefully he wrapped up the bundle, mucky side in, as he’d first found it. ‘Come on, you trouble-maker,’ he said to Roxanne. ‘The first thing you’ve found in your life, and it has to be Exhibit A in a murder mystery!’

Cappy’s reaction to the find surprised Jonathan. ‘Throw them away,’ she said, her voice high and strained. ‘Bury them somewhere. You’ll do no good by going to the police. Leave it, Jon. Have some sense.’

‘But why? What’s the matter with you? Whose do you think they are?’

‘Isn’t it obvious? That poor man, bullied almost out of his wits, mocked and humiliated. You must have seen it. He doesn’t deserve to go to prison. He’s a countryman, used to open spaces. It’d kill him.’

‘But
murder
, Cap. It’s not as if he’s been driving over the speed limit or poaching salmon. You can’t just get away with killing someone.’

‘Oh,’ she moaned with an impatient despair. ‘You soft Europeans, all fine words and no spirit. Sometimes killing’s the right thing to do. Death isn’t the worst that can happen, despite what you people might think. Guy was sick, with his anger and guilt. He had violent death written all over him.’

‘Lilah loved him. He can’t have been so bad.’

‘Lilah was his little princess. She had no cause to hate him, even though they had some rocky times ahead. Do you realise that girl has never had a serious boyfriend? Her precious Daddy wouldn’t have allowed it.’

‘Well, maybe – although I thought she was
pretty thick with that boy when she was at school.’ Jonathan was shocked at her insights; she had never said anything like this to him before. What was she quietly thinking about other people in the village? he wondered. But she hadn’t changed his mind – not altogether, anyway.

‘I’m going to show these to Lilah, for a start,’ he decided. ‘See if she can identify them. If she begs me to get rid of them, I’ll consider it, I suppose.’

Cappy shook her head. ‘You’ll get hurt over this, my sweet, if you’re not very careful. You’re as daft as your dog, you know that?’ She took him in a hug and pressed herself to him, in her favourite gesture. Her head came to his chin, and their two bodies fitted like jigsaw pieces. He stood there, feeling her warmth and rejoicing in her. When it came down to it, being married to Cappy was the only really important thing in his life. Everything else was just an amusing game.

‘I won’t get hurt,’ he assured her. ‘I’m
bomb-proof
, you know that.’

By morning Lilah’s dream was still not entirely forgotten, leaving a jangled sense of something disturbed, something irrevocably wrong. She was irritable with everyone, even the postman when he drove into the yard just as she was walking back to the house and handed a bundle of letters to her.

‘Save my legs, eh,’ he said brightly. She just grunted at him, not even bothering to flick through the envelopes to see if there was anything for her. What would be the point?

They were all for Miranda, who opened them absently; letters from strangers had become a daily occurrence following her husband’s demise. Guy had been a man of many parts, member of a
number of societies, several of which seemed to have learnt by some kind of telepathy that he was dead. One was in a pale green envelope, addressed in plain handwriting, a second-class stamp in the corner. Having opened it, Miranda had to read it three times before the significance was fully clear to her.

It was handwritten on both sides of lined A4 paper in a spiky style, with a rather spiky black nib.

The address was in Nottinghamshire and meant nothing to Miranda. Her first reaction was curiosity about the ‘mutual acquaintance’ who had passed on the news of Guy’s death. Curiosity – and a sharp pang of fear. There had been people spying on her. From one moment to the next her whole view of the village changed. This Barbara sounded seductively interesting. What had she done with her life? She had had twenty-five years as a single woman, with very little childcare responsibility, by the sound of it.

The references to money and legacies was worrying. Did this woman indeed have ‘rights’ of some kind? Had Miranda been wrong in not 
seeking her out and keeping everything open and legal?

‘Lilah!’ she called, glimpsing her daughter going into the barn, ‘Lilah, come here and have a look at this.’

Lilah looked up, irritation plain on her face. ‘What do you want?’ she shouted. ‘I’m busy.’

‘This letter. You should read it.’

Lilah made a show of clumping crossly across the yard, where Miranda waited at the kitchen door. She snatched the letter, and glanced impatiently at it. Miranda watched her face register incomprehension, dismissal, then a sudden profound interest. The girl read it right through twice. ‘Oh!’ she said.

Excitement rippled through her. Despite knowing and wondering about her father’s first family, she had never expected them to take the first step in making contact. It had always been as if they lived in Australia; or even that they were dead. They had never mattered, never seemed real. To receive a letter from them was very strange indeed, as if a famous personality had called round uninvited for a cup of tea. It was something unreal that you could never have predicted. She looked up at her mother warily.

‘She sounds a bit peculiar,’ she remarked.

‘She didn’t have much of an education, apparently. She married Guy when she was only 
nineteen. He always said that was why it went wrong.’

‘How old is she now?’

‘Oh, I don’t know. Much older than me. Mid-fifties, I think. Not much younger than Guy. What a terrible cheek she’s got, writing like that.’

‘“Mutual acquaintance”. Who’s that, then?’

‘I’ve no idea. That’s the bit I didn’t like. Somebody’s been spying on us and sending news of us to this … Barbara. It makes my skin crawl.’

‘Scary,’ agreed Lilah. ‘She wants money, presumably. Has she got any claim, do you think?’

‘I bloody well hope not. They were divorced ages ago. I saw the papers – I had that much sense. I made Guy prove it wasn’t bigamy before I married him. He cut off all contact. We assumed she’d married again.’

‘This is so weird, Mum. Ghosts from the past.’

‘It’s always the same when someone dies. All their secrets come crawling out. It was like this with my Grandad. He had another woman, that nobody knew about. She turned up at his funeral, bold as you like. I shall never forget my poor Gran’s face. And my mum. I had to take her outside, before she could scratch the woman’s eyes out.’

‘How did anyone know who she was? She might have just been a friend?’ Lilah had never heard this story before. She couldn’t imagine her 
mother’s frail parent wanting to savage anyone.

‘It was obvious. She was crying. And she was wearing one of his old jumpers. Totally wrong for a funeral, but you could see she wanted it for comfort. Something of his to hold against her skin. I felt sorry for her. She was a nice woman, really. Surprisingly young. Grandad was nearly eighty when he died, and she was still in her forties.’ Miranda was focusing on the memory, forgetting her daughter and the letter.

Lilah felt ensnared in the tangled family mysteries. All her life, she had felt like she belonged to any normal nuclear family. Both parents lived with the children, slept in the same bed, and more or less got on together. It was more than many of her peers could claim. Now one of those parents had died in bizarre and suspicious circumstances, and half-brothers were materialising as if by magic.

Miranda squared her shoulders. ‘Give me the letter. I’ll have to write back to her. What do you think I should say?’

‘It’s entirely up to you. I suppose it would be best to meet her. If you could stand it.’

‘Why? What do you think might happen?’

‘Nothing, Mum. What do I know about it?’

But Miranda was intent on the letter yet again. Lilah could see that there was some attraction in this voice from the past. Perhaps, she thought, 
there would be a kind of consolation in discussing your dead husband with a woman who had also been his wife. Lilah herself had wished since Guy’s death that she’d had a sister, so that she could share with another daughter the precise nature of her loss. Watching her mother, she felt no resentment or criticism. But always, there was the pressure of the work, and she gave herself a brief shake.

‘You might be able to go and see her when things quieten down a bit. When Roddy’s exams are over, and the hay’s all in. Though I’d say Sam deserves a break more than you do.’

‘Since when did Sam ever want time off? He wouldn’t know what to do with it.’

‘You shouldn’t assume that. It isn’t fair.’

‘Don’t talk to me about
fair
,’ Miranda suddenly shouted. ‘That’s the last word you should be using to me these days.’

‘Okay.’ Lilah turned an offended shoulder to her mother and strode back to the barn, full of resentment and confusion. Every time she got into some kind of routine or rhythm, another distraction happened. Some new turn to the nightmare sent her spinning all over again.

Take yesterday
, she thought, as she threw straw bales about, trying to make space for a batch of new calves expected in the coming week. Cappy’s story of Guy and a stranger arguing in the street; 
Jonathan hinting that he knew more than he would say; Sam so silent and watchful; disgusting
goings-on
in the Redstone fields. At least, it hadn’t really been disgusting – that was her dream, making it in retrospect so violent and horrible. The dream had stayed with her ever since. What was there in her own mind that could transform a simple sex act into something so gruesome? The vicar and Sylvia, for heaven’s sake! There could be no sane reason for that conjunction. The only thing connecting them was the fact that they lived next door to each other, Sylvia’s smallholding running alongside the vicar’s extensive garden. Neither had found Guy especially congenial … but that could be said of almost everyone who knew him.

Sam was greasing machinery, in a smaller shed next to the barn. She could hear him clanking about; for a mad moment she imagined it was her father. But Guy would have been muttering or singing to himself as he worked; Sam was completely silent. The grass was ready for cutting, for the hay; that meant the mower’s blades had to be checked and probably sharpened, the hayturner dusted down, the baler set up with twine. Fortunately Sam knew the minutiae of these preparatory jobs; she certainly didn’t.

Having finished her rearrangement of the barn, she strolled round to see exactly what Sam was doing. They hadn’t talked seriously for 
days, except to share the farmwork and puzzle over which cows to dry off. Now, looking at him, she was shocked to see tears on his cheeks. He could only be crying for Guy, and she felt oddly reproached by this evidence of grief. Sam had known her father for longer than she had; he owed everything to the farmer, had been as close as a brother or son. Nobody had properly acknowledged this, and she felt painfully ashamed of herself, all the more so as she recalled her conversation with her mother the previous evening. Miranda seemed almost sure that Sam had killed Guy. Looking at him now, this seemed unthinkable to Lilah.

‘Are you all right?’ she asked him gently.

‘You can’t forget about it, can you?’ he mumbled. ‘I keep seeing it all, inside my head. Muck everywhere. I can smell it as well, and feel him, all weighted down with it. I can smell it on myself, now and then. Look – there’s still a bit in my fingernails, and I’ve scrubbed them raw trying to get it off. I threw my moleskins away, you know, stuffed them in the dustbin. Couldn’t abide having that smell on them.’

She looked, as invited, at his fingernail. ‘That isn’t muck, Sam. It’s a little scar. You’ve got a Lady Macbeth complex.’ Too late, she realised what she’d said. ‘Not that I mean—’ He didn’t seem to have grasped any sinister implications, though 
he snatched his hand away, and turned back to greasing the blades of the mower.

Lilah pressed on, wanting to get some things straight, things she should have talked over with him days ago. ‘Den said we ought to have left it all, for their investigation.’

‘What – left him in there?’

‘Perhaps not that – but not cleaned up, at any rate. They might have been able to work out exactly what happened, if you hadn’t hosed down the edge of the pit.’

Sam shrugged. ‘I thought it was best.’ He fell silent for a moment, scratching his thick, greying hair. At forty, he looked much older. Although healthy enough, the outdoor life had not treated him well. Broken veins and rough hands, a slight limp from the time Guy had let an implement fall on his foot, and above all a permanently downcast glance: it all made him appear less than Lilah knew him to be. She noticed that he was wearing one of Guy’s wax jackets and it seemed to her rather endearing that he should have taken on the boss’s mantle like this. He was, in effect, the farmer now.

‘There was muck everywhere, you see. I thought, well – I thought your Dad might feel a bit embarrassed, his yard in such a mess. With officials all over the place. Daft, I suppose. I didn’t think.’ 

‘I know what you mean.’ She spoke the plain truth. Guy’s first response to any kind of bureaucratic visit was to get Sam to hose down the yard, which did tend to accumulate manure and mud at a surprising rate from the brief twice-daily crossing made by the cows.

‘It doesn’t matter now, anyway.’ They looked at each other, sharing the moment of despair and acceptance. Lilah had spoken for both of them, and he nodded slowly in agreement. Miranda had been right, Lilah realised: Guy was dead, killed by someone who had reason to commit murder. A dirty death, for a man who’d carelessly hurt a lot of people. It didn’t matter, not in any serious way, whether or not that person was arrested, prosecuted, imprisoned. The facts would remain unchanged.

Sam squared his shoulders. ‘I meant to tell you – I’ve taken Boss’s gun, to keep with me. Thought it might be a good idea.’

She looked perplexed. ‘What made you think of doing that?’

‘The police said something about being careful. That gave me the idea.’

‘Did you tell them about the gun?’ He shook his head again. ‘Show me where you keep it,’ she said firmly.