Read A Fine Cauldron Of Fish Online
Authors: Cornelia Amiri
Tags: #celtic romance paranormal romantic comedy novella vampire funny fantasy
“
God Mannan beg mac y Leir,
if it means he will still live, then do it. I don’t want him harmed
just because he wants me free.”
The god chuckled and let go of his
cloak so the hem hit the floor.
Andrew quivered. Mannan beg mac y Leir
seemed so cruel, to actually laugh at them. If only he didn’t harm
Margaid, then Andrew could live with whatever the god dished out to
him.
"Let’s run through this
again. Andrew, you want Margaid to be free, not a slave to you and
not a
lhiannan shee
to me. A free, human woman. And you are willing to die to ask
the favor for her.” Then the god turned to Margaid. “You want
Andrew to be kept safe and unharmed and you are willing to let me
turn you into a
cabyll-ushtey
, which is in truth your
greatest fear.”
Andrew gazed into Margaid’s eyes and
they both answered yes.
The god’s brow furrowed. “So you would
sacrifice yourselves for each other.”
Andrew placed his hand gently on
Margaid’s shoulder and leaned down to her. “You shouldn’t do that.
I couldn’t stand it if anything happened to you.”
“
Nor I you. The worst he
will do to me is turn me into a water horse. I would rather have
that than for you to be killed or harmed.”
Mannon bellowed, “Why would
you do this? Why sacrifice yourselves?” He turned to Andrew. “She’s
a
lhiannan shee
,
who tried to drain your blood.” He glared at Margaid. “He’s an
American tourist, who tried to commit you to a mental
hospital.”
“
She couldn’t help
it.”
“
He didn’t mean
to.”
“
You are both daft.” The
god shook his head.
“
I love him.”
“
I love her.”
“
Oh love. You love each
other,” the sea god said with disdain.
“
Don’t hurt her.” Andrew
pulled Margaid behind him to protect her.
But she jumped out in front of him.
“No, do whatever you want with me. You can change me into a water
horse, you can change me into a barnacle, but let Andrew
go.”
Silence descended as Mannan lifted his
spear. Just as fast as he raised his weapon, he dropped it to his
side in a stance of peace and he burst out in a deep, warm chuckle.
“Why would I harm either of you? I have nothing against love. I
just wanted to see if it was true. Honestly, I have never seen a
worse case of true love.”
Mannan grasped the hilt of the magic
sword hanging from his belt and withdrew the long, gleaming blade.
He held it high and chanted. “Without delay, for love’s sake, I,
the god of the sea, transform this fey to a mortal woman. In
darkness and light, now and forever, so it shall be.”
A ray of golden light burst
into the air surrounding the long sword like a halo. “By the
righteousness of my blade, Fragarach, you are free from the fey
bonds and life of the
lhiannan
shee
. You’re human, Margaid.”
*****
Heat filled her body from her heart to
her belly and radiated outward to her skin. A rapt joy bubbled in
the core of her being. From the tips of her toes and fingers the
sensation of transformation deepened until she could barely stand.
Margaid reached out her hand to steady herself as she staggered.
She started to fall.
Andrew caught her with both hands on
her waist. A mystifying tremor coursed through her body. Then it
all stopped. Her heart fluttered. She slowed her huffing and caught
her breath. This was it, the most profound moment of her long life.
“I am human.”
Gazing at her patron god,
warm joy bubbled in her. “God of the sea, I give thanks to you for
granting my wish. Blessings upon you great god, Mannan beg mac y
Leir.” But how can I repay him. Is he not the most wonderful god?
“I am sorry I failed you as a
lhiannan
shee
.”
“
You didn’t. I wait for
my
lhiannan shee
to
come out of their caves under the sea and find a man to seduce.
When they do, they fall in love.” Joy shined in his eyes and the
warmth of his smile echoed in his rich, deep, yet melodic voice.
“Margaid, I am known as the trickster god and rightly so for I do
love a good joke. And my
lhiannan
shee
are a good joke on me. None of them
have the spirit for seducing men or shedding blood. Take your
rightful form as a mortal, as it fits your spirit best and be off
with your true love.”
“
Oh, I’m so happy.“ She
wrapped her arms around Andrew. “Now I can truly be your lover. As
a free woman, I choose to stay with you forever.” People can see me
and talk to me. I don’t have to fill a red cauldron with blood. I
can throw the cauldron out.
“
By the way, I’ll need my
red cauldron back.” Mannon folded his arms across his
chest.
Andrew’s gleaming eyes widened.
“Margaid, you’re human.” His smile broadened. “And you want to stay
with me.”
“
Forever,” she whispered.
Then she let out a squeal of happiness. “I am human and you are
human and we are together, whoop, whoop, dee doo.”
She breathed in his musky outdoor
scent and enjoyed the feel of his muscular shoulders beneath her
hands.
She leaned her face to his and pressed
her lips against his firm chin, all over booth sculptured cheeks,
and across his smooth forehead in feathery light pecks. Everywhere
but his lips. She flicked her tongue out, and with the tip only,
she traced the outline of his lips. Her hunger to cover his mouth
with hers intensified until she almost wanted to scream. Still she
held back. She puckered her lips and pushed them against his in a
fast smooch. She then scraped her teeth against his lower lip and
drew away, leaning her head back. He grabbed her hair and yanked
her head to his. Crushing her lips with his. He twisted his mouth
over hers, his hot wet lips massaging hers. He forced her lips open
with a thrust of his tongue. Margaid moaned and shivered with
desire as he stroked her mouth with his pliable tongue. She met his
fervor as her tongue curled, danced and twined together with
his.
Margaid heard someone enter the room
but she wasn’t about to let anyone or anything interrupt this
kiss.
“
Hello,” somebody
called.
A lady cleared her throat as loudly as
possible until Andrew withdrew his mouth from Margaid’s and turned
his head to see who’d come in.
“
Hello, you’re the nurse
from the hospital.” Andrew’s brow crinkled and his eyebrows
arched.
What is she doing here? Margaid glared
at the nurse.
“
She's more than a nurse.”
Mannan flashed a wry grin.
The nurse gave a slight shrug. “I’m a
druidess as well.”
“
High priestess to Mannan
beg mac y Leir,” the god announced.
“
Mannan didn’t have
another
lhiannan shee
drain my blood. It worked. Margaid’s human now,” Andrew told
her, then turned his gaze back to Margaid and made love to her with
his eyes.
“
I knew it would.” The
nurse walked to them. “Mannan beg mac y Leir is a trickster, his
rage can be as wild as a storm, but love doesn’t anger him, except
when someone steals his lover away.”
Mannan held his palms up. “Don't bring
up Fand.”
“
Well, though your wife
left you once, she came back and that says a lot.” The
nurse-druidess smiled sweetly at her patron god.
While the god and the druidess talked
to each other, Margaid leaned up on her tiptoes and pressed her
lips, still swollen from the previous kiss, against Andrew’s. Their
lips molded together. His lips were incredible, hot and moist. Her
mouth tingled as her lips moved with his.
As he suckled her lips, his hand slid
down her dress to the bulge of her breasts and he squeezed a
cloth-covered mound. Her knees trembled. Even with the barrier of
the fabric, she felt the sultry heat of his palm. Her breasts
throbbed and she felt her nipples tighten until they were erect.
She felt on fire. Heightening the kiss, he tugged gently on her
lower lip with his teeth, nibbling until she moaned.
Andrew pulled Margaid to him, crushing
her against his rock-hard body. Slipping between her parted lips,
he thrust his soft, warm tongue hard into her mouth. His tongue
made sweeping motions and whisked her mouth as she dug her nails
into his shoulders. Then his tongue found hers and they tangled
together. Margaid felt like melted wax pooled into liquid heat at
the base of a long, thick, flaming candle that never burned
out.
The nurse-druid begged for their
attention by clearing her throat as loudly as possible.
Margaid wanted to hit her. Why is she
here? Doesn’t she have better things to do?
Andrew eased his mouth away from
Margaid’s and they both turned toward the obnoxious
noise.
“
Go back to the hospital,”
Margaid told her.
The nurse-druidess’ laugher rippled
through the air. “So it all worked out and you are going to get
married now.” Her mouth curved into a friendly smile.
“
Why not?” Andrew gulped.
He bent down on one knee. “I don’t have a ring for you yet, but
I’ll get you one. For now though all I can do is ask. Margaid, will
you marry me?”
Flooded with joy, ready to burst free
of earth and float to the sky, her throat tightened and her eyes
welled up until she couldn’t speak. This time at least, she knew it
wasn’t because of Mannan‘s enchantment.
After taking a slow, deep breath, she
squeaked out, “Yes, I will.” Tears slid down her cheeks.
“
I can perform the
ceremony.” Mannan beg mac y Leir beamed even brighter.
“
Now?” Margaid gazed into
Andrew’s eyes. “You want to marry me now? But I don’t have a cake
or flowers or a silk and satin gown.” What am I saying? I should
have stopped at yes.
“
Yes, now.” Andrew’s face
beamed like the summer sun. “Why not?”
Margaid shrugged. “There’s no reason
not to. We’ll get a cake later.” She wanted to scream and yell with
joy.
“
I'll change things
around.” Mannan conjured up enough white roses to fill the
room.
The nurse-druidess pulled two
gold-speckled, white robes out of the closet and handed one each to
Margaid and Andrew.
“
I forgot, the father of
the bride’s supposed to pay for the wedding and Mannan beg mac y
Leir, you owe me for all you put me through, so where is my
cake?”
“
Margaid, you’ll get fat.”
Mannan winked.
“
Cake now,” Margaid
commanded the god.
“
Chocolate?” he meekly
asked.
“
Of course.” She
nodded.
An eight-layer tier cake, taller than
Margaid, suddenly appeared.
Andrew looked scared. “I can’t eat all
that.”
“
I can,” Margaid smugly
announced as she licked her lips. “It is Belgian?” She glanced
sideways at the god.
“
Of course, Margaid.” He
sounded hurt. “I would never proffer a faithful servant less than
the best. Made just this morn by descendants of the ancient Belgae
tribe, worshipers of mine. They created the delectable masterpiece
as an offering to me and trust me, you don’t even want to know the
blessing they are asking for.”
“
Don’t tell us.” Andrew
rolled his eyes. “I really don’t want to know. I just want to marry
Margaid.” With a quick smack, he planted a warm, wet kiss on her
plump lips.
“
Let’s get on with the
wedding.”
As he stood in his robe,
waiting for the nurse-druid to finish braiding white roses in
Margaid's hair to go with her milk-toned, gold speckled robe, he
asked the god, “Why are the
lhiannan
shee
different than other vampires, they
don’t drink blood, just drain it into red cauldrons?”
Mannan laughed. “My
lhiannan shee
love
chocolate. They can’t stand the taste of blood. So I have them keep
it in a red cauldron. Pretty funny, don’t you think? And even so,
they never take any blood. It’s just not their way. Their cauldrons
are always empty.”
“
So they’re vampires who
don’t drain or drink blood.” Andrew scratched his head.
“
Hilarious, don’t you
think?”
“
Yes.” Andrew
chuckled.
“
I love a good joke.”
Mannan grinned.
The nurse-druid brought a box of
crystals in from the storeroom and laid them in a large circle on
the floor. She tossed white rose petals inside the
circle.
Andrew clasped Margaid’s hand so their
wrists touched in promenade fashion. “You’re so
beautiful.”
He led her around the crystal ring,
then they strolled into it, together.
Mannan stepped inside the center of
the circle along with the nurse-druid. He gazed at Margaid and
Andrew. “In the world of humans and the land of the fey, nothing
can stand between a man and a woman meant for each
other.”