A Gentle Rain (48 page)

Karen's knees buckled. I picked her up. I toted her outside the arena for some fresh air, with Estrela following us like a happy pup. Estrela didn't try to bite me. Wonders of wonders, she even nuzzled my shoulder.

My woman was in my arms and her mare wasn't biting me. About then, the fireworks went off at Disney World, lighting the horizon like they were just for us. We three stood looking up at the sky, watching the fancy starbursts of New Florida flash among the grandeur of Old Florida stars. Sometimes, the old merges with the new in a fine way, and sheer heart and soul beat the system.

It don't get no better than that.

Chapter 29

Kara

After a good night's sleep with my head on Lily's lap in the waiting room ofthe CCU, I was gifted with a shower, pain pills, and a complimentary set of green operating room scrubs by the CCU nurses. Lily, Mac and I tiptoed into Joey's cubicle while Ben and Miriam went to breakfast. Mac carried a tall surprise hidden inside a large, plastic garbage bag.

"We have a gift for you," I told Joey.

His eyes gleamed. "It's almost as big as me!"

Mac set the bulky present on Joey's tray table. I nodded to Lily. She untied the drawstring. "Ta dah!" she said, and pulled the plastic down-i.

The ornate trophy gleamed under the cubicle's fluorescent lights. Atop it, a golden cowgirl circled a golden barrel on a golden horse. I pointed to a blank placard area at the bottom.

"They're going to put the names right here. It will say, `Presented to the Thocco Ranch.' And below that will be the names of everyone who loves Estrela. Mac and Lily, and Roy and Dale, and Miriam and Lula, and Bigfoot and Cheech and Possum. And Ben," I smiled at him. "And you."

Joey's eyes widened. "My name will be there in gold? Forever?"

"Forever."

"Forever." He rolled the word on his tongue. His smile faded. He began to frownn. "I don't think I'll be here ... forever."

The alarms on his monitors began to shriek.

I put my cell phone away as Ben stepped into the waiting room. "How is he?"

"They had to shock his heart to settle it down this time. He's doped up but restin' quiet. For now "

"I'm so sorry. We shouldn't have brought the trophy here. It was too much excitement for him, on top of everything else."

"Sssh. There ain't no rhyme or reason for what's happenin' to him." Ben's voice broke. "What you've done for him ... you've made him happy. He's ... peaceful."

"You don't have to fight his battles alone. Come on. Sit do,411. Miriam and Lula have taken everyone downstairs for lunch. You and I need to talk."

I led him to a couch by a window. Orlando's busy streets and tourist enclaves bustled below us. Ben sat down wearily, his tanned arms on bluejeaned lulees, his shoulders slumped, his head bowed. "Don't tell me no fairytales or say it'll be all right. It won't be."

"I'd never tell you there are miracles. But I'll tell you there's good reason not to give up hope."

"Baby, I been living on hope since I was a kid. I ain't never given up on it. But it's give up on me plenty of times."

"Ben, I need to tell you-"

"Ben Thocco?" a man said behind us.

Ben and I turned. A casually suited executive stood there. Sedge had underestimated the arrival times. Ben and I stood. He frowned. "Yeah, I'm Ben Thocco. What can I do for you, friend?"

"It's what I might be able to do for your brother, Mr. Thocco." The man advanced, hand out. He introduced himself and they shook. "I'm with a cardiac research group based at Emory University, up in Atlanta. We're involved in new, experimental surgical techniques. There are no guarantees, Mr. Thocco, but Joey appears to be a good candidate for our program."

"Are you saying you might be able to save his life?"

"Possibly. It will require risky surgery, and as I said, there are no guarantees. But if you're interested in hearing more, I'll tell you all about it."

"I'm interested," Ben said.

Ben

The second me and Karen were alone again I grabbed her in a hug. "Joey's at least got a chance, now."

She smiled. "Yes. It's wonderful."

I cupped her face in my hands. "You're a good-luck rabbit's foot."

"It's time I told you some details about myself. My good luck streak has a ... story behind it. Let's go sit down somewhere very private, and I'll try to-"

"Mr. Thocco," a new voice said.

We turned. Karen sidled behind me. With her face swollen up, I figure the hiding for a natural reaction. Another stranger in a tailored suit smiled at me. "I'm here to organize your brother's transfer to Atlanta-"

His eyes went to Karen, behind me. "Kara? Oh, my God." He headed toward us with both hands out.

Karen groaned against my back, then sighed and stepped out. "Yes?" she said.

The man nearly bowed to her. "Kara, I was so sorry to hear about your parents. Charles and Elizabeth were so generous in their contributions. And Senator Whittenbrook's influence has been so helpful in obtaining grants. I just want you to know that the Whittenbrook family's support means a great deal to our research. I'm glad we could do something for you, personally, in return."

I looked at Karen real slow. "Your name's Kara, not Karen?"

"Yes," she said. The more she studied my face, the sadder her eyes got.

"And just for the record, what's your last name?"

She took a deep breath. "Whittenbrook," she said.

"I'm a big boy, so don't worry about me," I told Karen. We stood in the hospital parking lot. She'd been crying. I sure felt like it. "I just wish you hadn't made a big deal of tellin' me, awhile back, that I'd earned your trust."

"It's not about trust. That's not why I didn't tell you who I am."

"Then what's it about? A secret little game? Lemme make sure I understand. You took care of my barn mortgage with Sun Farm?"

She sagged. "Yes."

"That old man I met at the arena. Sedge. He runs things for you."

c"Yes."

"And the mermaid theater, that Spielberg deal? That was your doin'?"

"Yes."

"And ... Tom D. Dooley's property?"

c'Yes ."

"Did I even win the damned poker game? Or was that a set-up, too?"

"Of course you won it. I had nothing to do with that. I swear to you.

"Thanks for small favors."

"Please, don't look at me that way."

"You never had nothing to risk here. Nothing. You played me. What a joke all of this drama musta been, to you. All of the worryin' about money. The kind of money that's just pocket change to somebody like you."

She put a shaky hand on her gold locket. "I risked losing my parents' ashes at a pawn shop. It was no joke to me."

"You knew you could sneak back and buy that necklace, if you had to. There was never any real worry on your part. Not about the necklace, not about anything. I don't have a problem with you bein' rich, Karen. Kara. Whatever your name is. It's that you pretended to worry instead of just admittin', `Hey, I'm rich. Want some money?"'

"You wouldn't have taken it."

"That's not the point."

"Ben, everything I've ever said to you about respecting you, about respecting what you've accomplished at the ranch, is all true. And everything I've said about wanting to help preserve the ranch. True. I love the ranch. I love everything about it." Her voice broke. "I love everyone there. If you'll let me, I'll help you take care of them. I'll be your partner."

"How can we be partners? It takes equal parts to be partners."

"No, it takes equal trust."

"I agree. We don't have that."

She went real still. She shut her eyes the way people do when they're kicking themselves inside. Yeah, I'd made my point. Good for me. When she opened her eyes, there was no fight in `em. Just apology. "I am so sorry. I'm begging you to forgive me. I made a huge mistake by not telling you who I am a long time ago. I've been so proud of myself for taking risks, but I backed away from the one that had the power to hurt me most."

"Look, what I can't forgive is not how you lied to me, but how you lied to the others. You came to my ranch under false pretenses-I figured that from the start, yeah, but still, I let everybody fall in love with Karen Johnson. You encouraged `em to love you, and to depend on you.

"I warned you to take their feel n's seriously. I was worried all along that they'd be hurt when you moved on. But I got caught up in depending on you, too. I got caught up in a fantasy that maybe I could convince you to stay at the end of the summer.

"But now I see that you never really trusted me, not even after you said you did, not even after the Keys. And there was never any way in hell you intended to stay, was there? Were you afraid I'd go after your money?"

"No. Ben, please-"

"And another thing. Why does Kara Whittenbrook care so much about Mac and Lily? Give me one good, honest reason why you didn't want them to know who you are."

She looked up at me for a long time. I could see a lot of emotions churning inside her. Finally she said in a real quiet voice, "I wasn't certain I wanted them, or anyone else, to know that I'm their daughter."

Whoa.

I needed a minute.

I stepped back.

I searched her face. When you love somebody, you get to know their face as good as your own. You see past the flaws; you see the inside-out.

I had to see her a whole new way before what she said could really sink in.

"Mr. Thocco," a woman called from a hospital doorway. "There are papers you need to sign, regarding your brother's transfer to Emory for surgery." When neither me nor Karen broke our trance to answer, the woman called again. "Mr. Thocco? This is urgent."

"Be right there." I heard my voice like an echo down a long hall.

My God, it was true. I stepped closer again, looking at everything I could see now. "You look like Lily. And when you stuttered that day at the horse show in Fountain Springs, you sounded just like Mac. My God."

She nodded. Tears slid down her face. "I'm sorry I didn't confess to you sooner. I didn't know about them until after my adoptive parents died. I'm still not sure what to tell them. Especially if they won't admit they had a baby."

I scrubbed a hand over my hair. A dull thought shut me down. "You're still not sure you want people to know your real parents are retards."

It was the meanest thing I coulda said to her. She backed away from me. It was like I'd hit her. "I love them," she said, her voice breaking. "I didn't expect to love them, I admit that. But I do. And I was ashamed when I first learned about them. I admit that, too. But now I'm ashamed that I ever thought of them as an embarrassment. And I don't deserve what you just said to me."

She left me there to swallow the sour taste of my pride, alone.

Kara

The next morning, everyone from the ranch gathered around Joey's bed. The World Sports Network executives held up an oversized check for one million dollars. It was made out to everyone at the ranch, by name, including mine. Karen Johnson.

Karen Johnson still existed, if only on paper and in the trusting minds of Mac, Lily, Joey, and the others. I tried to avoid looking at Ben. Tears burned the backs of my eyes.

Photographs were made. Hands were shaken. The quick ceremony was for Joey's benefit. He and Ben would leave for Atlanta that afternoon. I would help Miriam and Lula shepherd everyone else back to the ranch.

And then we would wait.

Everyone gazed at the check. "I can't even imagine how much money that is," Lily whispered.

Miriam chortled. "Even after taxes eat up nearly half of it, we'll all get about fifty grand apiece." They had agreed to split the winnings evenly. I would get my share.

"Fifty grand," Roy said. "What's fifty times a grand?"

Lula laughed and hugged him. "That's enough to buy you and Miss Dale all the fancy shirts and hats you could ever want."

"With plenty left over to give to Jesus," Dale said.

Bigfoot whistled. "I'll get all-new mouse toys for my cats."

"For me? A new camera to take pictures of rocks," Cheech said.