A Hidden Truth (10 page)

“No need to worry. I'll be working at this end of the Küche. The rest is yours.” I knew they would seize every opportunity to watch my techniques. Of course, we all knew I had none. “And don't mention this to anyone. It is to be a surprise.”

Mary nodded. “I'm sure it will be.” She remained at her table but eyed me as I gathered my ingredients. “What kind of candy are you making, Sister Karlina?”

“
Marzipankartoffeln
. Have you made them before?”

Both girls nodded their heads. “Ja. Making the marzipan potatoes is easy. But I hope you have already shelled the almonds. Shelling and chopping the almonds will take more time than you have this morning.”

My mother had already warned me about shelling the almonds, and I went to the general store after she gave me permission to make the candy. I used some of my time in the barn to shell the nuts. After telling Anton of my surprise for Dovie, he helped with the project, and when we had finished, I helped him clean the barn. I was certain he had come out ahead on that exchange.

I didn't tell anyone, but I had used the coffee grinder to chop the nuts. I'd been careful to wipe away any remnants from the device when I finished last night. One of the men told Mother that the coffee had tasted extra good this morning. I held my breath and waited. But when she merely thanked him, I was certain she hadn't noticed anything was amiss.

“Do you think I have enough?” I held out the bag of chopped nuts. I'd begun with a large bag, but once they were chopped, it didn't seem like much.

Both girls stepped closer and looked into the sack. Antje shook her head. “You won't make much candy with that.”

Mary agreed and pointed to a wood bowl and pestle. “You need to make the nuts finer. They are chopped, but for the marzipan, they need to be ground like flour.” She grinned at me. “You should be thankful you have nothing to cook, or you would never finish.”

I could see they were taking great delight in my lack of ability, but I was determined to make the best candy possible. Besides, I didn't need much. This was a gift for Dovie, not the entire village. My hand and arm ached by the time Antje and Mary declared the nuts fine enough for mixing with the sugar, flavoring, and egg white.

“Be careful you don't add too much liquid at once, Karlina. You don't have enough almonds to thicken the paste.”

As the time passed, the girls took pity on me and I was thankful for their help. Both of them checked the mixture and declared it a good consistency to form the Marzipan into the shape of small potatoes. While I rolled them, Mary drew near and gave a nod of approval. “They look gut. You have the cocoa and cinnamon mixed so you can coat them?”

“Nein. I will do that once I've finished rolling them.”

She reached for the metal container of cocoa. “I will mix it for you. The candy needs a little time to dry before everyone returns to the kitchen.”

I thanked her, and while I finished rolling the mixture into oblong potato shapes, she pushed them around in the cocoa mixture until they were covered. “You need to dust some of the cocoa off so they look like real potatoes.”

Once I had finished rolling the shapes, I followed Mary's example, and when I was done, my candy looked as good as any I'd ever eaten. I admired them with more than a little pride and then looked at the two girls. “They are gut, ja?”

“To taste tells the real truth,” Mary said. She eyed the candy and then traced her finger above each one as she counted.

“We wouldn't want Dovie to get sick from eating too many,” Antje said, drawing closer. “I think we should taste them and see if they are gut enough to give as a present.”

A nod of my head was all they needed before each one bit into a piece. “It is perfect,” Mary declared.

“It is.” The surprise in Antje's voice affirmed that they were telling the truth.

A warmth of satisfaction washed over me. Soon I'd be ready for Christmas.

CHAPTER 10

Christmas Eve
Dovie

When supper had been eaten, the dishes washed, and all of the women departed for the day, Cousin Louise and Cousin George instructed Karlina, Anton, and me to go to our rooms.

“I'll tell you when you may come out,” Cousin Louise said. “And no peeking, Karlina.”

While Karlina and I went into our bedroom, Anton went off by himself. “I do feel sorry for him. It doesn't seem right that he can't be with his family for Christmas.” I knew my opinion didn't matter to anyone. I was an outsider and didn't understand many of the decisions made by the elders. But I did know that even being surrounded by another family wasn't the same as being with one's own, and Anton and I had that in common this Christmas. I swallowed hard as memories of past Christmases pushed to the forefront of my mind.

Karlina sat down on the edge of her bed. “I feel sad for Anton, as well. I asked my Vater why he couldn't go home for at least a couple days, but he told me I should not question the decision of the elders. They believe he will do better if he remains away from his own village for a longer time.”

Taking a position on the edge of my own bed, I met Karlina's gaze. “What has he done that is so bad?”

Karlina shrugged. “He says he has a bad temper and the elders had warned him that he would need to leave his village if he did not learn self-control. He didn't tell me what he did; he just said that he didn't heed their warning.” She clasped her hands together. “And it is true that he has difficulty controlling his temper.”

She spoke with an authority that allowed fear to enter my mind. I leaned forward and grasped her hands. “Has he lost his temper with you?”

“He has spoken in anger, and I have seen evidence that he lacks control, but I know he is working hard to conquer his shortcomings. I do think he is doing better, but it is likely the elders have judged him correctly.” She straightened and withdrew her hands. “Please don't think harshly of him. We all have faults, and he is working to correct his. But he has been sent to work in a place that isn't familiar or to his liking.”

“I would think the elders would have chosen to send him to work where he could most easily adjust. Even to me it is obvious he doesn't like working with the sheep.”

“There is much he can learn from working with the sheep. When they finally begin to trust and follow him, the elders will likely send him home.”

I chuckled. “So the sheep can judge good character?”

“Ja!” Karlina bobbed her head. “Much better than most humans, I think.”

We could hear noises in the parlor, and even though this wouldn't be the same as Christmas Eve in my own home, my anticipation increased along with Karlina's. I hoped that she would like my gift. In that moment I realized I had nothing to give Anton.

“Karlina, I have no gift for Anton. What can I do?”

“A gift is not necessary. He will not expect anything from you.” She grinned. “I doubt he has thought of gifts for us.”

“But you have a gift for him, don't you?” I hoped she would say no, but she nodded her head, and my heart plummeted. “What will I do?”

She clapped her hands together. “I know! He wants to learn English.” She jumped up and went to the desk and pulled out a piece of paper. “Write down that you will give him English lessons so long as he is a gut student and doesn't become angry when corrected.”

“The English lessons are a wonderful idea, but I am not going to say he has to study and remain calm.”

“You may be sorry if you don't.”

I laughed and nodded. “Then I will tell him at our first lesson.”

“Agreed. Now hurry or we will be called to the parlor before you finish.”

I composed the note, slipped it into an envelope, and carefully penned Anton's name on the outside. I was blotting the ink as Cousin Louise called to us.

When we stepped into the hall, I noticed she'd closed the door to the parlor. “First, we must go downstairs to the kitchen and have our cookies and coffee; then we will come upstairs to the parlor.”

I tucked the envelope into my pocket and hoped I could place it with the other gifts once we returned upstairs. While Karlina and I arranged cookies on one of the large china platters, Cousin Louise lifted the coffeepot from the back of the stove and filled cups with the steaming dark liquid. We had gathered around a small table in the kitchen to eat our cookies when the door burst open and Pelznickel tromped into the room, carrying his burlap bag and leaning on a long walking stick.

Karlina had told me that each year Brother Herman dressed as grizzled old Pelznickel and came to the houses in East. Once he arrived, he decided if we had been bad or good throughout the year. The gift he retrieved from his bag revealed his decision. I'd never had a visit from Pelznickel, but I'd heard some of my friends in Cincinnati talk about such visits. Standing in front of Anton, he reached into his bag and withdrew a small sack. After pondering his decision for a minute or two, he handed it to Anton along with a similar one to both Karlina and me.

Ringing a brass sleigh bell that had been fastened to the leather belt that surrounded his worn fur coat, he bellowed a laugh. “No switches or coal for anyone this year.” He reached down and helped himself to several cookies, waved them in the air, and tromped to the door. “Merry Christmas!”

We returned his Christmas greeting while Anton opened the small paper sack. His mouth gaped open when he looked inside the bag. “An orange and some pieces of hard candy. The first time I haven't received switches in many years.”

Brother George grinned. “Then this indeed is a gut Christmas for you. Maybe Pelznickel knows that you have been studying the Scriptures and have learned that ‘A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife.'”

Anton closed the paper sack. “I learned that Scripture many years ago, Brother George.”

“Ja, but now you are putting it into practice. That is the key. To learn the Scriptures is one thing, but to practice them in our daily life is another. That is what we all must try to do.” He stood and squeezed Anton's shoulder. “Even Pelznickel understands that you are trying to do better. Come, let's go up to the parlor and see if there are any gifts to be opened.”

When Cousin Louise opened the parlor door, it wasn't the gifts that captured my attention, but the lone stocking that hung above the fireplace. From the bright smile on Karlina's lips, I knew she was responsible. Tears threatened as I recalled telling her of the tradition my parents had begun when I was a small child. I never imagined that she would hang a stocking for me. While Cousin George lit the candles on the pyramid, she removed the oddly shaped stocking from the mantel and handed it to me.

“Merry Christmas, Dovie.” Karlina placed her hand on the stocking. “As you can see, I do not knit very well, and I must admit that I made this stocking when I was only thirteen years old. Mutter declared it unusable. It has been tucked away in my drawer ever since. But after hearing of your tradition, I think I found a good use for it.”

I stood and kissed her cheek. “Merry Christmas to you, Karlina. It is a very special stocking that I shall treasure.”

Anton choked back a laugh. “I think Karlina handles wool better when it is still on the sheep.”

Even Karlina laughed at his joke, but then she said, “Reach inside and find what I made for you.”

I sat down, placed the misshapen object on my lap, withdrew several small packets, and unwrapped one. “You made candy, Karlina?” I looked to Cousin Louise for affirmation.

“Ja, she did it on Sunday while we were at meeting.”

Anton leaned toward me and held out his hand. “Maybe you should let me taste it to make sure it is fit to eat.”

“And maybe you should keep your hands to yourself. That is Dovie's gift.” Karlina lifted a package from the mantel and handed it to him. She smiled. “But this one is for you.”

Anton unwrapped his candy and popped a piece into his mouth. “Umm. It is not very gut, Dovie. I think you should give yours to me. I will eat it for you and save you the misery.”

Laughter filled the room, and the sound created an uneasy mixture of joy and sadness deep within. It seemed wrong to enjoy myself this first Christmas after my mother's death. I wondered if my father had someone to laugh with on this cold winter evening. Forcing the thought from my mind, I handed out my gifts to each of them and watched with anticipation as the three of them unrolled the scrolls of paper and Anton opened his envelope.

“This is beautiful, Dovie.” Karlina's eyebrows rose in surprise. “Is this what you were hiding at the desk when I came up to the bedroom?”

I nodded. “I was afraid you had seen it.”

From the surprised look on her face, I knew that Karlina hadn't discovered what I'd been creating. I'd chosen a different verse of Scripture for each family member, and using the calligraphy skills I'd been taught in school, I had painstakingly penned the verse onto thick linen paper. I'd written the verses in German, of course, and had even sketched a small sheep on the one I made for Karlina.

“Nein, but I did think you were keeping a secret from me.”

“Only a Christmas secret. And I will put them in frames for you, but there wasn't time enough to do that earlier.”

Cousin Louise clucked her tongue. “You do not need to do more, Dovie. This is quite beautiful, and George can make us frames for them, can't you, husband?”

He nodded his head. “Ja, and I will be pleased to have something useful to do when my bones are aching and I'm unable to tend the sheep.”

Anton waved his envelope toward me. “I cannot read this. It is not written in German.”

I smiled and gave a nod. “It says that if you would like, I will teach you some English while I am here. Karlina said you are interested in learning.”

“To speak, ja, but even if you remained for the rest of your life, I do not think you would have enough time to teach me to read and write another language.”

“Then I will spend some time each day teaching you to speak English, and we shall not worry with reading or writing.”

Anton tucked the piece of paper back into the envelope. “Thank you, Dovie. This pleases me very much.”

I exchanged a secret smile with Karlina. Her suggestion had been perfect. In truth, he appeared much more pleased with the promise of English lessons than with the shepherd's crook Brother George and Cousin Louise had given him.

We had nearly finished opening our gifts when Cousin Louise lifted a package from beside her chair. “This is from your Vater, Dovie. It arrived the other day, but I saved it for Christmas.”

My heart tightened at the sight of my father's handwriting. He hadn't forgotten. All of them watched as I opened the box. A smaller box lay nestled inside the larger one, and an envelope rested below. I'd been eager for news from my father, but the sight of his letter brought both joy and uneasiness. What if he sent for me before I learned more about my mother?

Karlina drew closer. “Do you have any idea what it might be?”

Hoping to temper my unsettling thoughts, I forced a smile. “No, but soon we shall all know.” I untied the string, peeled away the brown paper, and opened the box. Inside lay a gold locket engraved with my initials. I lifted it from the bed of black velvet and clicked the latch. My breath caught when it flipped open and revealed a tiny picture of my mother. I traced my finger over the likeness, longing to once more feel the softness of her skin or hear the sweetness of her voice.

“It's beautiful,” Karlina whispered. “Is that an early picture of your Mutter?”

I swallowed back my tears. “Yes. The picture was taken on their wedding day.” I handed the locket to Cousin Louise and watched as she examined the picture.

A tear formed in her eye as she handed it back to me. “I loved your Mutter deeply. She was like a sister to me, and I know you miss her.” She clasped my hand. “After our twins died I spent many hours on my knees asking God to fill the empty spot in my heart with His love. I hope you have been doing the same, Dovie.” She cleared her throat and pointed to the letter. “Maybe you would like to go and read your letter while George and Karlina show Anton the best way to use his new shepherd's
crook.”