A Hope Remembered (18 page)

The plane leveled in the air, and Nora felt her insides return to their normal places. Any nervousness she might have felt before taking off had disappeared as quickly as the scenery they passed over. She trusted Colin and his skill as a pilot.

The world below reflected every shade of green, and the sky stretched sapphire blue above them. The plane flew over another lake and Nora craned to see their reflection in it. The scarf Colin had lent her streamed out behind her, a splash of white against the azure-colored water.

She twisted in her seat to look back at Colin. His mouth was curved in a youthful grin. Even his leather hat and thick goggles did nothing to detract from his good looks. Nora faced forward again, her stomach twisting afresh with flurries of anticipation. This handsome, charming baronet-to-be desired
her
company.

His expression while flying matched the openness and joy she’d seen on his face last week when he’d sheared the sheep. Here was the real Colin Ashby, doing something he loved.

What do I love as much as Colin loves flying?

The lack of a ready answer punctured some of Nora’s excitement. Did she love sheep farming? It was a question she’d asked herself numerous times since finding the rock through her window. She loved working hard and seeing the fruit of her labors, so raising sheep seemed as good a profession as any. Music was another source of great enjoyment—listening to it, singing to it. But was that enough to make a full life? Sheep farming and music? Her own silent reply came quick and piercing: “No.”

Nora shut her eyes.
What more would you have me discover here, God?
Was she meant to find greater love? Of life, of another man?

Not so many years ago, she’d lived life with zest. It had been one of the qualities Tom loved about her. But where were those enthusiastic feelings now? After losing Tom, then her parents six months later, she had bottled up all that passion for life and locked it away. Feeling too much, even happiness, meant opening herself up to more pain and heartache. Better to rely on God and live alone than experience the sharp grief of loss all over again.

But is it relying on God to lock away my feelings, my dreams, my passions?

The question pummeled Nora’s mind as hard as the wind slapping against her face. She’d been so certain she’d turned all her difficulties over to the Lord—being on her own, moving across the world, learning to be a sheep farmer. And yet she’d failed to give up her greatest burden, the lock on her heart.

“Forgive me.” She whispered the words aloud, knowing Colin wouldn’t hear her over the rushing air and the noise of the plane. “I want to live life fully, not cautiously anymore.”

Her eyes still closed, she let the sounds around her fade into the background. In her mind, Nora pictured the faces of Tom and her parents. Next she reached inward and pulled out all her grief, her fears, her hurt over their deaths from the darkest places of her heart. She lifted her arms outward, the wind tugging hard on her hands and zipping wildly through her fingers. She imagined releasing her pain into the air, letting it fall away from her and the plane.

Several tears slid down past her goggles and froze against her cheeks, but they were more a product of relief than regret. With her arms still outstretched, she felt as if she were flying without the aid of the plane. Emotions she’d long since buried blossomed inside her once again—elation, freedom, hope, peace. No wonder Colin treasured his time flying. Nora had never felt so alive.

She felt the plane banking to the right. Opening her eyes, Nora peered down and caught glimpses of a large castle, crumbling stone walls rising high, and green fields falling away to a river. The pictorial view from high in the air stole her breath.

She wanted to fly forever, but Colin lowered the plane and began circling around the castle. “I thought we’d walk through it,” he shouted.

Nora nodded. There was still the flight back to Larksbeck, and the closer they drew to the castle, the more she became excited at the prospect of an exploration. When was the last time she’d gone exploring, not merely walking, for the pure delight of doing so? She couldn’t remember.

As the plane dipped down and bumped onto the grass near the castle, Nora felt droplets of water smack her chin. Where had the clear blue sky gone?

By the time they’d glided to a full stop, the rain was falling faster. Colin climbed out of the plane first and helped her to the ground.

“So much for the good weather.” He shook his head, though he didn’t appear too upset.

Nora removed her cap and goggles and turned her face toward the sky. She’d never enjoyed an hour as much as she had this last one, and a little rain couldn’t dampen her spirits.

She shot Colin a full smile and returned to letting the rain wash over her unbound hair. “It’s absolutely perfect.”

C
olin couldn’t agree more—the day was turning out to be perfect. He took off his cap and goggles to get a better look at Nora. She completely entranced him with her raptured expression and the way her red hair fell loose below her shoulders. Did she know how pretty she was, especially with her face upturned to the rain like that?

She did look as if she was enjoying herself. He decided to follow suit and lifted his chin to the moisture. The rain ran over his jaw and into the collar of his flying jacket. But he felt too happy to care about getting wet today. He’d seen the way Nora had stretched out her arms to the wind. She appeared to love flying as much as he did. To share the sanctuary of the skies with her had been the right thing to do.

They stood side by side a few minutes longer, until the mild downpour became a torrent of water. “We can wait it out in the castle,” Colin said, grasping Nora’s hand. He led her at a run across the grass and beneath the covered archway of the castle’s tunnel.

Water dripped off them both, creating puddles on the stones beneath their feet. Nora wiped some from her eyes and laughed. With her hand still captured in his, Colin reached out and brushed strands of dampened hair off her forehead. She gazed up at him, her large blue-green eyes full of sincerity and…longing? Her slightly parted lips seized his attention, and he tugged her closer. Could she hear the rapid thudding of his heart over the sound of the rain?

Yesterday they’d been interrupted before he could kiss her, but today, in this moment at least, they were alone. The castle was their own private world.

Colin leaned toward her. When her eyes fell shut, he needed no further prodding—he narrowed the hairsbreadth distance between them. He skimmed his lower lip against hers, the feel of it soft and smooth beneath his touch. The whispered kiss stoked fire within him and was all the proof he needed to know her lips were more delectable than he’d imagined. He wound his fingers through the damp hair at the nape of her neck and kissed her fully on the mouth.

It was as if he were soaring in his plane again. The euphoria and vibrancy of kissing Nora was the same as flying. Colin wanted it to last forever, to give in to the passion stirring between them, but he reminded himself he was still a gentleman.

Exerting great willpower, he stepped back. Nora opened her eyes and blinked as if startled from a dream. Colin bit back a smile—she’d enjoyed the kiss as much as he had.

“Come on,” he said, pulling her gently after him. “I’ll show you the castle.”

He guided her to the other end of the tunnel and motioned to a nearby crumbling wall. “That wall outlined the courtyard and over there you can see there used to be another tower.”

“Who did the castle belong to?”

Colin lifted her hand and satisfied himself with kissing her knuckles. “It actually belonged to a woman.”

“Really?” Nora gave him a playful smile. “A sheep heiress like me?”

“Well…no.” He laughed and she joined him. “A woman named Lady Anne Clifford eventually came into possession of this place, though it wasn’t hers at first. She was meant to inherit all the Clifford properties upon her father’s death, which was quite unheard of, even in the seventeenth century.”

“What happened?”

Colin rested his back against the cool stones of the tunnel. “Apparently the properties went to an uncle instead, so Lady Anne Clifford spent a good portion of her life regaining them. She restored Brougham Castle here, and this is where she died. In the room where her father had been born.”

Nora leaned into his chest, and he was only too happy to place his arms around her. “I like that story.”

“I thought you might.” He placed his chin on top of her hair, relishing the chance to hold her. Together they watched the rain from the dryness of the tunnel.

If only they could stay like this, Colin mused, without having to return to Larksbeck and all of the expectations and demands required of them both.

When the rain lessened, he straightened from the tunnel wall. “Do you want to see the view from the top?”

“Very much. Can we get up there?”

Nodding, he led her back the way they’d come to a winding staircase that would take them to the top of the ruins. The stairs were slick from the rain, so Colin kept a firm hold on Nora’s hand and navigated them slowly to be sure she could easily follow.

When they reached the third floor, Colin guided her a few feet from the stairs before stopping. The view from here was one of his favorites, with the fields and trees spreading out like a carpet before him and the River Eamont lolling along a stone’s throw away. Overlooking such beauty, his arms around Nora, Colin felt like a king himself, with his queen at his side.

“It’s breathtaking,” Nora murmured, her head turning from one side to the other to take in the scenery. “I thought Larksbeck was gorgeous, but this is almost…”

“Unreal,” he supplied.

She nodded in agreement.

Much like you
, he wanted to say.

How had he ever enjoyed life before Nora came along? How would he survive if he was successful in convincing her to leave? His father’s pleas and Christian’s entreaty to save Elmthwaite echoed in his head, but Colin fought them back. Why must he choose? His family’s three-hundred-year-old estate for the woman he was beginning to love. Wasn’t there a way to have them both?

Nora leaned her head back against his shoulder and released a sigh that resonated with pure contentment. “Thank you, Colin. Not just for taking me flying, but for bringing me here. I’ve not had such a wonderful day…” Her voice broke. She cleared her throat to finish, “In a very long time.”

The urge to kiss her once more filled him to distraction. He freed one arm and gently twisted her to face him. Tipping her chin upward, he pressed his lips to hers. The kiss lasted only a few moments, but it was long enough for Colin to decide he would fight to keep Nora here. Somehow, someway, he would figure out how to save the estate by the end of the month and still keep the affection of this woman he admired more than anyone in the world.

Humming to herself, Nora strolled down the road from Elmthwaite Hall to her cottage. She held the ends of the white scarf draped around her neck, which Colin had told her she could keep. She wanted to fly again, see the beautiful castle again.

Kiss Colin again.

Her cheeks flushed at the memory, but she couldn’t help the broad smile that lifted the same lips he’d explored earlier. How many times had she contemplated kissing him? Yet even her imaginings had paled in comparison to the real thing, to how cherished she felt in his arms.

Her elation did come at a price, though. Almost at once, after that first kiss, she’d been assailed by dragons of doubt and guilt over kissing another man—and a wealthy, titled one at that. But Nora had refused to give in to the fear. Things would work out somehow.

If she ignored the incident last week with the rock, she could honestly say her life here in England was every bit as fulfilling and happy as the one she’d left behind in Iowa. Even more so, she had to admit, as she recalled standing on the castle tower, wrapped in Colin’s strong embrace.

The past was the past, including the isolated threat against her. Perhaps it had simply been a mean joke. From someone jealous of her acceptance into the community or her success on the sheep farm.

She calculated the amount of money she’d received from the shearing and what she thought she could get when she sold her male lambs. While the total sum wouldn’t put her anywhere near the Ashbys’ social ranking, she figured she’d have enough to do some updating inside the cottage and put away a little in savings. Not bad for her first few months as a sheep farmer.

Nora switched from humming to singing as she walked up the lane to the cottage. She’d tied Phoebe out front today. The puppy began tugging on her rope the moment she caught sight of Nora.

“How was your morning, Phoebe?” She untied the dog and sat down to allow Phoebe to shower her with affectionate licks. “And my morning, you ask? It was absolutely wonderful. I flew in an aeroplane and…” she whispered into the puppy’s ear, “kissed Colin. Twice.”

The dog jumped from her lap and proceeded to wrestle with one of her shoes. Nora laughed and shook the puppy off. “Yes, we’ll play in a bit. But first I need to see about those nasty weeds in the garden.”

She climbed to her feet and headed to the back of the cottage, Phoebe running beside her. Thoughts of the garden brought back the memory of Colin covered in dirt from their fight. She chuckled softly. How she prized his friendship, his company, his attention. Could they make something more work between them, him as a baronet-to-be and her a lowly sheep farmer?

Eleanor hadn’t been able to. Nora had read the night before how things had been forced to an end between Eleanor and E. When he’d returned after four months in London, E was different. While Eleanor still sensed he loved her, something in their relationship had changed. A few weeks later, he came to see her and confessed his father had learned of their secret two-year courtship. The man refused to condone a marriage between E and Eleanor.

Unwilling to go against his father’s wishes, E bade Eleanor good-bye. Occasionally they saw each other at village functions, but they never acknowledged each other publicly or met alone on the fell again. A year later, Eleanor learned he’d married a wealthy young lady from Manchester.

Nora sighed as she came around the cottage and approached the garden. Poor Eleanor. Her heart had been broken. Nora certainly hoped to escape the same fate.

Now to the weeds. She went to the garden but stopped short of kneeling beside the plot. A horrified gasp escaped her throat at the sight before her. Nora covered her mouth with her hand. The garden had been completely destroyed, weeds and all. Not a single plant stuck proudly out of the soil anymore. Everything had been trampled or ripped up and tossed haphazardly aside.

Phoebe sniffed at the mess and barked. Nora sank to her knees in the grass. Had the rain and mud been the culprits? But she knew better. There in the dirt in front of her, still fresh, she saw the imprint of a boot sole. Someone had deliberately wreaked havoc here, just as he or she had done the week before with the window.

The rock and note hadn’t been the end of it. If it was a mean prank, it wasn’t over yet. Nora wrapped her arms around her middle as the breeze buffeted her. The day no longer felt inviting and cheerful, but cold and dark. Someone still wanted her gone.

The murmur of voices outside his window woke Colin the next morning. The clock on the mantel read ten minutes to seven o’clock. He climbed out of bed and went to pull aside the curtains. On the drive below, Sir Edward, already dressed for the day, was conversing with several farmers. Two of them held a ladder and a third had a tool box in either hand. As Colin watched, his father directed the men around the house and out of sight. Apparently the stable project began today.

Colin returned to his bed and shut his eyes, but sleep had already fled. Sitting up, he let his gaze wander over the lavish furnishings of his room. They reminded him of the old château in France where he, Christian, Lyle, and some of the other RFC pilots had lived. Unlike his life now, though, his days during the war had been filled with purpose and work.

Another glance at the clock confirmed it was still too early to go see Nora, as much as he wanted to after yesterday’s shared flight to the castle. Colin propped his hands behind his head and grinned at the recollection of kissing her. What to do until he could go visit Nora? He thought of the sheep he’d sheared last week and the feeling of satisfaction the task had given him. They didn’t own many sheep anymore, but what about the stables? He could help with the renovation project, especially if he slipped in after his father had finished giving the men their instructions.

Throwing off the blankets a second time, he went to the wardrobe, though he decided not to ring for Gibson. His valet would likely turn up his nose at the clothes Colin planned to wear today. He sifted through the wardrobe’s contents until he found the well-used trousers and shirt he used to wear when he went hunting with Christian. Though the pant legs were an inch or two shorter now, Colin figured they’d do. He pulled on his flying boots and slipped downstairs. After snagging an apple from the dining room, he headed to the stables, eating as he walked.

The long, two-story building behind the house had been capable of handling up to fifty horses at once. Over time, though, the family’s equestrian stock had dwindled to half a dozen and these were now housed in the barn. For years, the stables had sat empty.

Today all the doors had been thrown open. As Colin approached, he could see the farmers inside. He recognized Jack Tuttle, and a self-satisfied smile spread across his face. Maybe it was time to give Jack a taste of his own medicine. The young man might be the wrestling and shearing champion of Larksbeck, but Colin was no weakling when it came to hard work. He might not be as agile and strong as he’d been at the height of the war, but most mornings he still performed the same exercise regimen he’d done every day in France.

“Morning, gentlemen,” he called out as he entered the stables. He took a final bite of his apple and tossed it into a nearby rubbish barrel.

All three glanced in surprise at Colin, though Jack’s expression soon became a scowl.

“Mr. Ashby,” the oldest of the three, a Mr. Sodry, said with a tug on his cap. Colin remembered seeing him and the other fellow, Mr. Cripe, at the shearing at Nora’s and at church.

“What are you tearing down first?” He eyed the rows of horse stalls. “I’m here to help, if you’ll have me,” he added as they continued to gawk at him.

“We don’t need any help from the likes of—” Mr. Sodry held up a hand to stop Jack’s protest.

The older man fixed Colin with a respectful gaze. “If you’ve a mind to help, we’d be glad for the extra hands. Though I can’t say we’re partial to splittin’ our wages with you.” He winked at Colin.