A Jar of Hearts (13 page)

“Julia was worried about you,” he started. “When she said she would pay me, she only meant the extent she would go to just see you happy again. I would
never
take money to date you or any other woman. But there is no other woman, Anne. Not since I laid eyes on you. It’s only ever been you.”

“I don’t believe you,” she almost whispered.

“What will it take to convince you?”

She was silent, contemplating his question for a while. “Say it to me again,” she muttered at last. “I… love you.”

He released her hands and stretched out over her. She stayed rigid and still, her breasts rising and falling quickly as he bridged the gap between them. She had to want him, he thought, his eyes resting on her lips. His thumb brushed the corners of her mouth, his cock pressing achingly hard against her stomach.

“I love you,” he whispered, his raspy voice grazing her face.

Her fingers spread over his wide, muscled shoulders, feeling him as if she was testing the credibility of his declaration. Did she believe him?

She raked up her hands to his face so slowly that he thought he would die from the hardness she was rousing inside him. And when she speared his fingers into his hair and sucked in a deep breath, he swore under his hoarse breath. There was only so much a man could take!

He crushed his lips against hers, stabbing his tongue hungrily into her mouth. She moaned and her sounds only starved him more for her. He was in no mood for sweet loving after all the beating she gave him. He wanted to hurt her too, one that she would also love.

His hand moved hastily under her dress, tugging her panties roughly off her. His fingers dove eagerly into her pussy, slipping easily through her juices and plundering her heat. His eyes sought her face, partly to ensure she was okay with what he was doing to her.  She arched off the bed as she pushed her pelvis further onto his hand. Her grinding had him almost gasping for air and he was caught between breathing and losing his sanity. He chose the latter, burying himself between her thighs, tasting her core.

She bucked off the mattress as his tongue thrust in and out of her. Finally, her thighs clenched, her fingers knotting his hair and pulling his head further into him so he could taste her orgasms on his tongue.

She stilled, taking deep panting breaths and he lifted his head off her to glance up at her. Her skirt was ridden up to her breasts, gathered messily at her neck. She was all bare to him except for her twisted garments that were clumped between them. She was certainly a sight. Her panties were torn and dangling to one hip and her flimsy bra hadn’t protected her breasts from his hands, weaving chaotically into her skirt.

Her disheveled state revealed his madness to possess her and yet here he was, hard again and wanting more.

He snaked up her and kissed her brow. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No.” She touched his torso with her fingertips as if he was fragile.

He pulled in a sharp breath of air. If she continued, she
would
probably break him.

“It was different,” she whispered. “I’ve never made love like that before. I didn’t know… there would be so much pleasure in such pain.”

It was true. He had always been so delicate with her and he knew it should shame him a little at least for being brutal with her, but the truth was he had been thrilled by their rough sex. And now to know she had felt the same…

He buried his head into her shoulder, wrought with the torment to have her again. “Does it make me a sadist to want to do it all over again? Right now?”

She gathered his head in her hands and kissed him tenderly. He speared his tongue into her mouth, tasting her all over again. He clasped her nape, holding her captive under him as he kissed her deeply, releasing her only when she broke away to gasp for air.

His hand ran down her spine to cup her buttocks, his mouth capturing her nipples. She let out a whimper as he suckled onto them. He lifted up her arms and pulled her clothes off her. He took her hands and helped her wrap her fingers around the bars of the headboard.

“Don’t let go until I say so,” he rasped into her ear.

He removed the rest of his clothing and then straddled her. He looked down on her naked body. She was perfect in every way, he thought as he admired her. His cock rested on her sex, quivering to enter her. He thumbed her clit and she arched her back with pleasure.

He burrowed his head back into her juncture, wrapping his lips around her clit.

“James,” she moaned, releasing her hold from the bars to feather his hair. But he clasped her hands and returned them to the bars.

“You want me inside you?” he whispered.

She nodded, unable to blurt out the words.

He smiled. “Then don’t let go.”  He kissed her breasts. “That’s gonna have to cost you. I forbid you to cum.”

She closed her eyes, pulling in a sharp breath. He pushed his fingers between her slick folds and watched her writhe with passion. Her scent rose to his nose and he couldn’t help but return his tongue to her clit. Her erratic breathing filled the air as he laved her nub, flicking it with his tongue.

“James, I need you,” she groaned.

“Beg me.”

“Please.”

He thrust his fingers in and out of her like a piston. “Properly.”

Her hands grew white from her tight hold on the bars, her voice almost breathless. “Mercy.”

It was all he needed. He wanted release just as much as she did. He sat on his knees, spreading her legs apart.

“I won’t be gentle, Anne,” he said hoarsely.

“I know.”

He unwound her hold on the bars and threw her on her stomach. He tugged her buttocks up into the air and then began to mount her.

“Are you sure?” he asked again.

“Yes,” she uttered.

He entered her slowly and she let out a little cry as he broke her seal.  He thrust into her softly and as she became accustomed to him, he increased pace. He yanked her up against him, continuing to pound into her roughly until their bodies clenched together from the orgasms racing their hearts.

They lay in bed, her head tucked into his shoulders, cherishing the warmth their naked bodies gave each other. He caressed her arm and she let out a sigh.

“I used to hate you,” she started.

“Why? Did I do something to make you feel that?”

“No,” she said softly. “On the contrary, you did everything right. Too right.”

She lifted up her head and he kissed her lightly on her brow.

“You know you can tell me anything,” he said.

She thumbed his jaw tenderly. “You were too much like Eric. You spoke like him and I bet you look like him too. I’ve touched you. I know.” She wrapped her arms around his waist tightly. “I couldn’t think I could love someone who was so much like him. I hated you for it. I hated that you were like him and yet… not him.”

He closed his eyes.
I am Eric, Anne. I’m still here.

“Are you saying you love me now?” he asked aloud.

“I’m… attracted to you. I know you said you loved me, and I’m sorry I can’t say the same back to you. At least, not yet.”

“Shhh,” he whispered, turning on his side to hug her closely. “I didn’t say it so you could say it back. I told you how I was feeling and that was all to it.” He kissed her cheek. “Besides, attraction is always a good place to start.”

He threaded his fingers into her hair as she tucked her face under his chin. But who was he kidding? He was splitting in two in the inside. He was glad she was loyal to Eric, but he didn’t understand why it hurt that she didn’t love James.
I am both, damn it. It doesn’t matter either way. She loves Eric and she is with James.

He closed his eyes, sinking into his dreams. Tomorrow he would wake up and everything would be fine. He would be Eric and she would love him like she always did.

She opened her eyes with a smile and turned into the warm body beside her.
Eric.
She had always loved his smell. She pressed her nose against his neck to sniff him. He moaned in his dreams and she almost laughed out aloud.

She kissed him lightly on his chin, loving the feel of his day old stubbles. He wound his arms around her, hugging her tightly so her breasts pressed against his hard torso. It was then she remembered that she was still naked. They had made love for most of the night and right now she was in a serious need of a shower.

Love? She paled, growing stiff as she registered where she was. This wasn’t Eric.

She shifted out of his embrace and felt her way towards the bathroom. How could she have mistaken him for Eric? She turned the faucet on, standing under the heavy spray of the water. It felt soothing on her tired and spent body. She could try lying to herself but she did enjoy his lovemaking. In that regard, he was nothing like Eric, who on the other hand, had always been gentle when they had sex.

She grabbed a towel and wiped herself dry.
I love you
, she remembered his words. A chill ran up her.  She had denied loving him last night, but the truth was she was beginning to feel for him. Other than the sex, he was every bit her Eric. Perhaps, fate was giving her a second chance.

She rummaged in his closet and found a shirt she could don temporarily. She couldn’t go traipsing in his kitchen naked. What if the windows were open? Her stomach rumbled and she headed down to fix herself something to eat.

Something knotted inside her as a feeling of déjà vu surfaced over her. This felt too familiar. She brushed her hair aside with the back of her hand and focused on what she needed to do. She loved berry yoghurt or pancakes, but she would have to check the fridge for any of those. He preferred orange juice and a toast.

She bit her lower lip. She was muddling up her fantasies with her reality again. No, it was Eric who liked orange juice and toast for breakfast. She had no idea what James liked.

“You’re up,” he said, startling her.

“I didn’t hear you come down.”

“Were you trying to run away again?” he asked as he gathered her in his arms. “I don’t think I’d be able to let you go this time.”

He nuzzled her neck and she chuckled. His naked legs brushed against hers, tingling her, enjoying the feel of his skin.

She stood on his bare feet, tippy toeing up to kiss him on his lips. “I was just trying to get some breakfast.”

“Yeah?” he said between his kisses. “Come back to bed.”

“It’s past eight in the morning. I really should be going home.”

He groaned. “You’re a big girl. Julia will understand.” He cupped her breasts, kissing her cleavage. “Let’s go back to bed, please.”

She caressed his hair, running it through her fingers. “Let me fix something up for myself and I’ll think about it.”

“Okay,” he grumbled.

“Okay.” She smiled, kissing his brow. “What will you have?”

“You.”

“I’m being serious.” She laughed.

“So am I.” He sulked.

“Oh come on, I promised you. After breakfast. Now, what do I get you?”

“You know, orange juice and toast. And there’s berries and yoghurt in the fridge,” he said, ambling lazily back towards the stairs. “I’ll get a shower while you’re at it.”

She stilled.
You know?
How could she? And how did he know what she liked to eat for breakfast?

She clenched her palm. There were too much uncanny resemblances between James and Eric. Was he… could James be Eric?

The door bell rang before he could climb back up the stairs and he looked warily at the door. Who could it be at such an hour?

“Jamie! Jamie! Open this damned door or I’ll shoot my way in,” Avanna screamed angrily.

He gave a quick glance towards Anne who was standing frozen in the middle of his kitchen.

“James?” she asked.

“Stay there, Anne. I’ll sort it out.” His voice was stern, but with Avanna hammering on his door, he couldn’t help sounding strict and protective.

“Who is it?”

He ignored the question, turning the door knob to open it.
Just a woman I fucked to try and get over you.
He swiped a palm over his face. He was so screwed.

Avanna pushed open the door, barging past him. “I was told you were on a date with a bitch last night. Is she here now?”

“Avanna, stop.”

“Who was she, Jamie?”

“You need to leave now, Avanna.” He moved to grab her arm but she dodged him, heading down the hallway.

Her high stiletto heels clicked rapidly against his floor as she strode into his house in her skin tight pants and black leather jacket. “I want to know if she is here.”

“That’s none of your business,” he said quickly, following her.  “We’re over, Avanna, so you had better get out of my house.”

“And I told you we’re not done until I say so.” She turned, staring directly at Anne. “Is that her?”

“Avanna…”

“She’s wearing your shirt! You fucked her, you fucking bastard!”

“James, what’s… going on?” Anne asked nervously.

“You fucked my boyfriend, you bitch! That’s what’s going on!” Avanna shouted angrily.

“Boyfriend? I… I didn’t know…,” Anne mumbled confusedly.

“Yeah? Well, how about I beat your tiny little white ass and then you’ll know what it is like shoving up your cunt into my boyfriend’s face.”

She moved threateningly towards her but James raced between them.

“That’s enough, Avanna!” he growled, pushing her away lightly.

Avanna fumed. “You pushed me? You’re actually protecting that little cunt? She’s dead, Jamie! She’s fucking dead!”

“I had better go,” Anne mumbled awkwardly.

“No,” James ordered, pointing his finger at her. “You’re staying.  Avanna, get out. Now.”

She gawked at him, her mouth agape with disbelief. “You actually love the bitch.” She threw her hands into the air. “I don’t believe you. I waited for you all this time so you could fall in love with a shit like her? She’s nothing compared to me. Just a fucking skinny blonde bimbo with a pathetic cunt to match. Come on Jamie, men want me. And I’m offering myself to you. Why would you want
that
over this?!”

James ignored her ranting and turned towards Anne to ensure she was fine. He hated to hear her being degraded like that, and although he wanted to manhandle Avanna and throw her outside his house so he could protect Anne, he had learned long ago to never lay a hand on a woman.

Anne was standing resilient and firm, seemingly unaffected by Avanna’s tirade, but that little twitch at her fingers told him it was all pretence. He bit down on his lips. He had to get Avanna out of his house and his life- somehow, someway.

“Jamie, look at me!” the woman shouted again, grabbing a glass jug and hurling it angrily before them. “Look at me, damnit!”

James stepped back in time before it could hit him. The jug shattered into a multitude of jagged pieces. He felt its water wetting his toes and instinctively stepped further away.

“Are you okay, Anne?” he asked, registering the widening in her eyes at once. Clearly, she was shocked. He wanted to take her in his arms but he would have to step over broken glass to get to her.

“What… what was that?” she stammered.

“Just a jug. Don’t move. There are shards of glass everywhere.” He braced his neck with his hands. He had let this go on too far. He carefully maneuvered his way around the shattered fragments and headed towards his closet for a pair of shoes.

Avanna peered at Anne with puzzlement and then let out a loud mocking laugh. “She’s blind? She is fucking blind!” She stomped her foot on the floor. “Fuck man, Jamie, you’re fallen for a blind cunt.”

“You’re right, I have,” he said, grabbing her arm. “But she’s no cunt.” He pulled her towards the front door.”

“Let go of me!” she cried, punching at his tight grasp. “I’ll kill her! Do you know how easily I can do that now?”

He opened the door and pushed her out. “I’m going to say this one more time, Avanna. There was nothing between us. And anyone who touches Anne answers to me.” She stood seething on the pavement and his heart softened. “Listen, Avanna, be reasonable. You’ve got to move on.”

“You’ll regret this, Jamie. I will make you come back to me. I promise!” She gave him one last glare before stomping off towards her car.

“No, don’t move,” he ordered. He marched up to her and scooped her into his arms. Glass crushed under his feet as he carried her a safe distance away and to a couch. “Sit here while I clean that mess up. You didn’t get any on your feet, right?” He picked up her feet, running his hand over the underside and scrutinizing for any wounds.

“I’m fine, James,” she insisted. “I really am.”

“I should get you some shoes.” He frowned, turning to the mess in his kitchen.

“Who was she?”

“Just a friend,” he mumbled, hoping she wouldn’t run off without him explaining the sordid situation. Perhaps, he should let the shoes be for the moment. Just in case. He picked up the dustpan and began brushing the broken glass fragments into it.

“Well, she assumed she was more than just a friend,” she continued. “Is there any reason she would believe that?”

“I gave her no cause or reason, Anne. She misunderstood and that was all.” He emptied the dust pan into the trash, its contents clattering as they fell. Those were the last pieces of broken glass and he hoped this would also be the last instance Avanna would barge into his house.

“Right,” she mumbled, rising out of her chair. “I should get dressed and start heading home.”

“Anne… please, I’d really like it if you stayed a little longer,” he said, ambling over to her side. “I really need you right now.”

“Yeah? Well then, perhaps you should start with the truth,” she replied flatly.