A Little Light Magic (26 page)

“What are you doing here, Leigh?”

“I work here, remember?”

“Oh, no,” Nick said. “Don’t even
try
to go there. You do not work here. Not anymore.”

“You can’t tell me what to do!”

“I certainly can. If I have to lock you in your room to make you obey me, I will.”

“That is so wrong! You just can’t—”

“Leigh,” Tori said quietly. She moved to the girl’s side and laid a hand on her arm.

Leigh looked at her, probably for the first time since entering the store.

“Do what your father says.”

She gave a disbelieving gasp. “You agree with this fascist?”

“No. Not completely. But he’s your father. You have to do what he says.”

“So you’re firing me? Because he
told
you to?”

Tori glanced at Nick. His grim expression and rigid stance told her he wouldn’t budge an inch on this. And things would only be worse for Leigh if she tried to defy him.

She sighed. “Yes, I suppose I am.”

Leigh drew a ragged breath. “Fine. Just fine.”

She whirled around and stomped out the door.

Silence ensued. It continued for the longest time, stretching and settling all around like a thick, putrid fog. Tori eyed Nick. He’d gone unnaturally still, his eyes flat. It was as if he’d drawn so far into himself that he didn’t even see her anymore.

“We should talk,” she ventured.

He dragged a hand down the side of his face and looked at her. He blinked and gave a small shake of his head, as if coming out of a dream. Or a nightmare.

“Talk? What the hell about?”

“Leigh. I think…Don’t get me wrong; I know you want to protect her. I know you love her so much you’d lay down your life for her. But did you ever stop to consider that you might be coming down on her a little too hard?”

“And you’re qualified to tell me that because…?”

“Because I care about her. And you.” She took a deep breath. “I love you, Nick.”

He stared at her. “You love me. That’s a joke. How could you love me? You don’t even know me.”

“I think I do.”

“No. If you did, the last thing you’d do is give my daughter condoms behind my back. Why didn’t you come to me with this? Tell me what Leigh was planning?”

She bristled. “And betray her confidence? I couldn’t do that.”

“No, you just encouraged her. Tucked condoms into her purse, for chrissakes.” His head snapped up, eyes widening. “Shit. Don’t tell me they were the condoms I bought for us!”

She flushed crimson. “I only wanted to protect her, Nick.”

“Damn it, Tori, that’s my job. And I’ll do it the way I see fit. I don’t need your interference.”

“You’re overreacting. I know Leigh almost died as a baby, and you’re scared to death something will happen to her, but—”

He paled. “Who told you that?”

“Johnny.”

He was silent for a long moment. Then, “The two of you discussed me?”

Tori bit her lip. “He told me some things, yes.”

His jaw worked. “He had no right to.”

She put out her hand, but he was so distant, so out of reach. “Nick, Leigh’s not a fragile little girl anymore. She’s a young woman. She needs some space to figure things out on her own.”

“So what are you suggesting? That I turn my back and let her screw her boyfriend in her bedroom?”

“No. Of course not. I—”

“Tori, Leigh has been the most important part of my life for almost eighteen years. I’m her
father
. Do you have any idea what that means?” He gave a short laugh. “But what am I thinking? How could you know? You think fatherhood’s a five-minute job.”

“Nick, I—”

But he was already moving toward the door.

What ever you do, try not to get married for the wrong reasons.

Tori didn’t see Nick for a while after that sorry scene. She didn’t see Leigh, either, or any of the Santangelos. Johnny called twice from New York, but both times there had been a party going on in the background, and they didn’t talk long. He told her he was meeting with his agent and prepping for his screen test with some of his actor friends. Tori wished him luck and kept her problems to herself.

It was the height of the summer season. The sun was hot, the beach crowded, and Destiny’s Gate was making money hand over fist.

And Tori was miserable. She was out of candle magic kits, too, and none of the tarot readings she tried provided any insight. She was just going to have to get through this without magic.

She was thankful she had Chelsea and Mags. They tried hard to talk her out of her funk.

“There are plenty of other fish in the sea,” Mags said. “And anyway, you said yourself you and Nick were too different to last.”

“She doesn’t need to hear that right now,” Chelsea said, frowning at her partner. “God, you can be so insensitive sometimes.”

Mags shrugged. “I’m just stating the obvious.”

Tori let Lily pull on her necklace. Her arms tightened around the little girl’s wiggling body. She was so sweet, so innocent. Tori’s throat clogged.

“Now see what you’ve done,” Chelsea muttered to Mags. “You’ve made Tori cry.”

Tori shook her head, but succeeded only in dislodging a few tears from her eyes. She nuzzled Lily’s hair, trying to hide them.

“I’m not crying,” she said. But it was a lie. For the last few days she’d been sobbing nonstop. Probably PMS. She was expecting her period any day now.

Except days passed, then a week, and it didn’t come.

It didn’t come, and she dared to hope.

Nick showed up a few days later. It was late afternoon, and Tori was closing early. South Jersey was suffering from a wicked heat wave, and the shop was unbearable, even with three fans blowing.

The first thing Nick said when he stepped through the door was, “You need air-conditioning.”

Her heart lurched. He looked so good, so impossibly handsome, so heart-stoppingly sexy. He must have been spending some time outside lately, because his face was sunburned.

“And you need sunscreen,” she replied.

“I know, I know.” He rubbed the back of his neck, then winced. “I keep forgetting. We just broke ground on a new job, and I’ve been out on the site a lot.”

They stood there a few seconds longer, just looking at each other. She noticed the tired lines around his eyes, and the unfamiliar way his shoulders hunched.

“Why are you here? Is something wrong? Is Leigh—”

“Leigh’s fine.” He advanced farther into the shop. He was too big for the place; his elbow knocked into a wind chime. The tingling bells faded before he spoke again.

“I came to see how you were.”

“I’m fine.” Tori’s fingers gripped the sharp edge of the counter. Suddenly, she knew why he’d come. And it didn’t have anything to do with her.

His gaze dropped to her stomach. “Are you…”

“It’s a few days too early to tell.”

He met her gaze. “You’ll call me if you are, won’t you?”

She didn’t answer.

He paced nearer, closing the distance between them until only the glass sales counter separated them. “If you’re carrying my child, Tori, I want to be part of his life.”

“Even if you didn’t want him in the first place?”

“Yes.” He hesitated. “And…I’ve done some thinking. If you’re pregnant, I’ll marry you. If that’s what you want, I mean.”

Her heart nearly left her body.
I’ll marry you.
She’d longed for those words, but not like this. Never like this.

“You’re proposing?” She felt very far away, as if she weren’t there at all.

Nick shoved his fists into his pockets. “If you’re pregnant, we should do the right thing. A child should have parents who’re married.” He rocked backward on his heels. “When he’s first born, at the very least.”

“So.” The syllable echoed oddly over the rushing sound in her ears. “Let me get this straight. You want to marry me so your child won’t be…what? Illegitimate?”

“That’s right.”

“And then we can divorce afterward?”

“I didn’t say that. I…care about you, Tori. I think we could make a go of it.” He grimaced. “I’d like to try, anyway.”

“But only if I’m pregnant.”

He swore under his breath. “I’m making a mess of this.”

“Yes, you are.” The rushing noise mounted to a roar as rage kicked in. “What makes you think a proposal from you is such a great deal for me? What makes you think I’ll say yes? This is the twenty-first century, Nick. There is no way I’m going to marry a man just because he forgot to wear a condom.”

“Tori, look, I—”

“If you’re smart, you’ll leave. Now. Without saying another word.”

She flung her anger at him; it became almost a visible barrier between them. She wanted him to knock it down. She wanted him to reach past her hurt and her rage and drag her into his arms. She wanted him to kiss her, to tell her his proposal wasn’t just about the baby. She wanted him to say that he loved her, that he couldn’t live without her, that he would die if she didn’t say yes.

He didn’t say any of those things. He just clenched his jaw so tight she thought it would snap. And then he walked out the door. Again.

She got her period the next day.

Life can get lonely, with or without a family.

Nick shook hands with the Atlantic City building inspector. Thank God almighty, Bayview was a wrap. He wouldn’t miss this job—hell, he’d be thrilled just to break even when the accounting was done. Excusing himself, he stepped into the job trailer to check his voice mail.

There was a message from Tori.

His gut clenched. It had been two days since he’d seen her. She must know by now whether or not she was carrying his child.

His child.

A baby he didn’t want. He was sure of that, but despite his certainty, images blossomed in his mind, and they weren’t all horrific. In one, Tori cradled a newborn, the child suckling at her breast. Breast-feeding had been something Cindy’d flatly refused to do, no matter how much Nonna and Rita had coaxed her. But Nick was sure Tori would want to nurse their baby.

In another flash he saw himself on the beach, building an enormous sand castle. Leigh used to love that. He covered tiny toddler legs with wet sand, heard the giggles, felt a sloppy kiss on his cheek. He’d worked so much when Leigh was a baby that memories like those were scarce. If Tori were pregnant, things would be different. Despite the fiasco this Bayview job had turned out to be, his business was a lot more stable now. He could make time. He could make sure he and his new son or daughter had more of those moments.

“Yo, Nick,” a voice said.

He started, coming back to his surroundings, phone still cradled in his hand. He looked up at his job super.

“Yeah, Joe?”

“Southerland’s here. He wants to go over the punch list. Says there are a couple of things we gotta take care of.”

“Tell him I’ll be there in five.”

“Will do.”

The trailer door banged closed. Nick punched in the code for his voice mail, his heart pounding as he waited for Tori’s message to come over the line.

“Nick? This is Tori. I, um…” A pause. “I just wanted you to know—there’s not a baby. I got my period yesterday.” Another pause. “Don’t, um…don’t bother calling back, okay?”

He snapped the phone shut, but couldn’t seem to stop staring at it. Tori wasn’t pregnant.
Hallelujah.

He waited for relief to flood through him.

It didn’t come.

Instead, he was awash with regrets.

Tori cried enough tears to fill one of Nick’s five-gallon spackle buckets. She closed the shop and spent three days in bed, sweating in the awful heat, nearly bent double from the cramps. She wasn’t pregnant with Nick’s child.

Every time she thought about it, she started crying again.

Finally, on day four, she pulled herself together and got out of bed. She had to accept the fact that her time with Nick had just been a small detour on her life road. She needed to get back on track. But how?

She’d soured on the whole sperm donor idea. It was a great choice for some people, she supposed. Like Chelsea and Mags, or hetero couples who needed help conceiving. But for her, it just didn’t feel right anymore. So she stiffened her spine and went back to Dr. Janssen.

They had a serious talk. The thought of surgery made Tori feel light-headed and queasy, but she was determined to go through with it. It was her best option for preserving her fertility for the future. Someday, if she met the right man to be a real father for her child, she would think again about becoming a mother. But for now, she had to put her energy into getting over Nick.

The heat wave broke that night, a black storm blowing in from the north. The nor’easter poured buckets, and the next day was windy and unseasonably cool for August. Another storm threatened. Beachgoers headed inland, to the malls and movie theaters, leaving Tori pacing an empty shop.

Finally, at quarter to six, she gave up and turned the sign in the window from
OPEN TO CLOSED
.

She walked down to the beach. The wind was brisk and steady. It whipped stinging sand like pepper shot across her calves. Tufts of yellow sea foam formed a jagged line along the shore. She walked into the wind, picking her way through the detritus coughed up by the sea. A frayed plastic rope, a piece of splintered driftwood. A tangled fishing line.

She should’ve walked in the other direction. Or better yet, stayed off the beach entirely. But she couldn’t seem to help herself. The footprints she made in the sand led directly to the beach in front of Nick’s house.

She blinked as she saw Leigh and Sophie at the water’s edge. Leigh was staring out to sea, hands slung into the pockets of a red-and-white Beach Patrol windbreaker that was much too large for her. Jason’s, Tori thought. Sophie, a red plastic bucket in hand, scrambled back and forth near the water, head bent as she searched among the scattered shells for treasure.

“Hey,” Leigh said when she saw Tori. Jason’s jacket nearly swallowed her whole.

“Leigh. How’ve you been?”

“Okay, I guess.”

“Tori!” Sophie sped toward her, brown curls flying in the wind, her pink Lucy-the-elephant sweatshirt a blur. “Tori, guess what? I get to sleep at Leigh’s house tonight!”

Tori smiled down at her. “That’s great, sweetie.”

Sophie grinned, then turned and scampered back to the ocean. Tori turned to Leigh. “Have you been working at your dad’s office?”

“No. I haven’t seen much of him at all since—” She cut herself off and sighed. “Since that last day at your shop. He practically lives at the office now.”

“I guess he’s busy with work.”

“Yeah. He always is.”

Sophie ran back to them. “Look, Tori! I found a starfish.”

Leigh peered into the plastic bucket. “Hey, you did.”

Tori crouched down beside her. “It’s beautiful.”

“I named him Starrie,” Sophie said. “Can I keep him?”

“No,” Leigh told her. “He’s still alive. You have to throw him back.”

Sophie’s bottom lip bulged. “But I wanna keep Starrie. He can be my pet.”

“He won’t like that,” Tori said. “He belongs in the ocean. He’ll only die if you try to keep him.” She laid a hand on Sophie’s skinny shoulder. “Think how sad you’d be then.”

Sophie pouted. “But if I throw Starrie back, I’ll be sad
now
.”

Leigh and Tori exchanged glances.

Leigh hunkered down beside Tori and Sophie. “But what about Starrie’s family? His mom and dad are probably looking for him.”

Sophie’s brown eyes widened. “You think so?”

“Yes,” Tori put in. “His brothers and sisters are probably looking for him, too.”

“And his Nonna?”

“Yep,” Leigh said. “You wouldn’t want to make Starrie’s whole family sad, would you?”

Sophie tilted her head, her forehead creased in a frown. “I guess not,” she said with a sigh. She headed back toward the ocean, her feet dragging now, her bucket slapping her leg. She paused before she reached the water, though, captivated by some new treasure.

“Thanks,” Leigh said as they both stood. “She would’ve been screaming after I pitched Starrie back in.”

Tori’s gaze lingered on Sophie’s tangled curls. “I miss her.”

“She’s been asking about you, too.”

The wind gusted, raising goose bumps on her bare arms. She shivered, hugging herself. She should’ve worn a wind-breaker, like Leigh.

“I miss you, too,” Leigh said softly. “Let me come back to work for you.”

“I don’t think your father would go for that.”

She hunched against the wind. “I don’t care.”

“That’s not true. You love him.”

“So do you, Tori. And…I know he cares about you. I ruined it for you.”

“Oh, Leigh.” She saw tears on the girl’s face and she knew they weren’t from the wind. “What happened between your father and me wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes, it was. He wouldn’t have been so angry with you if I hadn’t lied to him.”

“Lied? About what?”

Leigh looked at her toes. “I told him Jason and I had…you know, done it. With one of the condoms you’d given me. But it wasn’t true. We were going to, but at the last minute I remembered what you told me.”

Tori’s face must have been a complete blank. What had she told Leigh? She couldn’t remember, exactly.

Leigh took a gulp of air and forged on. “You know, about the pink satin sheets and champagne?”

Tori blinked. “And you remembered that?”

“Yeah. I did. And you know what, Tori? I decided I want that, too. That’s why I told Jason I wanted to wait. He was disappointed at first, but now we’re okay.”

“I’m glad you were honest with him.”

“Yeah.”

“Are you still sneaking out to see him?” Tori asked. “Or has your dad eased up on the two of you?”

She bit her lip. “Dad will never ease up. Not after I told him I’d slept with Jason. I don’t even know why I said that—I just got so mad when he assumed we were doing it. Now he won’t even listen to me when I try to tell him the truth.”

She swiped a hand across her eyes. “So you see? It’s all my fault you two split up.”

Tori gave her a hug. “It’s not. Nick and I have plenty of differences that have nothing to do with you. Please don’t blame yourself.”

She drew back, but Leigh didn’t’ meet her eyes. She looked toward the ocean instead.

And cried out, “Oh, my God. Sophie!”

Tori’s eyes snapped to the sea. Sophie, still clutching her red bucket, stood chest-deep in the rough surf.

Leigh took off at a sprint. “Sophie! Get back here!”

The little girl turned and waved. “I’m sending Starrie home!”

Leigh shouted as a large swell rose behind Sophie; Tori sprang into motion, running toward the water. Leigh plunged in. Tori was right behind her. The leading edge of the swell became a line of writhing foam, poised to break over Sophie’s head.

“Sophie!” Leigh screamed. “Behind you. Watch out! Hold your breath!”

Sophie turned and shrieked. The breaker crashed, consuming her in froth. The red bucket shot to the surface, bounced once, and disappeared.

“Oh, God.” Leigh dove into the spot where Sophie had been.

Tori stood waist-high in the water, her skirt wrapped around her legs like seaweed. Frantically, she tracked the churning sea.

Nothing.

“Sophie!” she yelled.

Leigh surfaced, sputtering. “God, there’s a wicked undertow. Do you see her?”

“No.”

The single word was all Tori could manage. Panic clogged her throat. The ocean was a dark, dirty maelstrom. “I—Wait.” She spotted Sophie’s head, bobbing a good twenty yards out to sea.

“There!” she shouted, pointing.

“I’ll go after her.” Leigh gasped. “You go for help.”

“No.” Tori clawed at her skirt, ripping it off. “I’m a strong swimmer. I’ll go.”

The ocean swelled, blocking Sophie from sight.

“But—” Leigh began.

“Go!” Sucking a lungful of air, Tori flung herself in Sophie’s direction.

She caught sight of Sophie’s head bobbing on a wave. Her little arms thrashed. Tori stroked hard, praying Leigh would bring help in time. Her arms were burning with exhaustion by the time she reached Sophie. She grabbed the girl’s waterlogged sweatshirt.

“Sophie! Hold on to me.”

She heaved Sophie upward, dunking herself in the process. Before she could break the surface, Sophie had climbed up her body, wrapping her in a choke hold.

Tori slipped under, taking Sophie with her.

She struggled to pry the girl’s thin arms from her neck as she kicked upward. She broke the surface, gasping. Immediately, Sophie locked her arms around Tori’s neck.

“No! Don’t let me go!”

Tori managed to cough up a mouthful of water before the ocean heaved again. Sophie screamed, battling to climb up on her shoulders.

“Sophie! Stay still! I can’t hold you if you’re moving.”

Another wave sloshed, driving them both under. By the time Tori got them to the surface again, Sophie was choking.

She thrust the child skyward. “Breathe, Sophie.
Breathe.
”

Sophie coughed and drew a whooshing breath.

“That’s it, sweetie. Now just…relax and let me carry you. I promise I won’t let go.”

Tori looked toward shore. It seemed impossibly far away. While she’d been struggling with Sophie, the rip current had sucked them farther out to sea. Already, she was exhausted. She’d never be able to swim all the way back to the shore. She only hoped she’d be able to keep them both afloat until help arrived.

Then a wave lifted them, and Tori realized she had a more pressing problem.

The current was driving them toward the rock jetty.