A Love Least Expected (2 page)

Cade’s BMW waited at the curb in front of the exit. Dawn chose the front and I gratefully climbed into the back sliding over the chilled leather seats between Kylie and Avery. Even in the dim light of the car’s interior I could sense him watching me, checking the rear view mirror more than necessary, trying to catch my gaze.

There was no way I was prepared to do this tonight. Kylie’s apartment was always the first drop as she lived the furthest. Half an hour later he pulled the car to stop right in front of her building.

“Thanks, Cade talk to you soon.” Kylie chimed as she shimmied out of the car.

As I waited for her to clear the door, Cade’s eyes met mine in the mirror. There was no mistaking the expression of displeasure on his face. This was obviously not the plan he’d had for the rest of our evening. He held my gaze for a minute and then looked away as I slipped out of the car.

“Thanks for tonight guys, you’re great,” I called from the sidewalk before closing the car door and following Kylie inside. They all waved back as they pulled away from the curb.

I caught up with Kylie, the snow crunching loudly beneath my feet. The extreme cold making the snow sound brittle. Giant puffs of smoke rose with each breath as we marched towards the entrance.

“What’s up with you tonight Pay? You’re not still upset about Danny are you? Cause honestly, I didn’t think you were that into him.”

Leave it to Kylie to notice every detail even while inebriated. “No, I am not upset about Danny. He wasn’t the guy for me and I should have done it a while ago. It’s the being alone that’s bothering me.”

“Ahh, damn it Pay. You’re not alone, we love you. You want to get together again, all of us, in a couple of weeks?”

“Stop. Kylie, I’ve decided being alone is okay. I don’t have to succumb to the pressure of finding Mr. Right by a particular date on the calendar. And I don’t want any of you playing match maker.”

She pulled the heavy door to her lobby open and we stepped inside, stomping our feet to remove the snow. Her apartment was on the first floor, so without looking at her I started for the stairs. The last thing I wanted to do now, was talk about my feelings. I was already confused.

Her keys jingled in the empty stairwell as we came to her landing, I stood off to the side and waited for her to open the door, then followed her inside. I pulled my hat from my head and began undoing my coat in the darkened apartment.

“I’m wiped. You know where the spare pillows and blankets are. Are you bunking on the sofa or Jessie’s bed, you know she wouldn’t care.”

“The sofa’s fine, Ky. Thanks again.”

“Don’t mention it, I’ll see you in the AM Pay.” She waved behind her as she continued down the hall and into her room, closing the door behind her.

Alone at last, I shucked the rest of my winter wear and tossed them on the empty chair. I opened the storage bench in the corner and pulled out the pillows and blankets stashed there for just such emergencies and stretched myself out on the sofa. My silent phone poked me, reminding me of its presence, so I reached underneath and pulled it out.

In spite of knowing that I would sleep better not knowing, I powered the phone back on and watched as the screen came back to life. I had three new text messages. Surprise, surprise, I pressed the icon for my texts, and they were all from Cade.

So is that a no for breakfast?

Are you ignoring me?

Pay you know we need to talk!

Yup, I definitely would have slept better without reading those. I leaned over and placed my phone on the coffee table and stared into the darkness. The same question spinning in my thoughts. What happened tonight?

Cade, I’d known now for four years. I’d done everything with him, camping, studying, he’d crashed at each of our houses since we moved out of the dorms. Smiling, I remembered the one time we’d snuck him into our dorm. He was one of my best friends, why all of a sudden was I thinking of him as more.

In a futile attempt to avoid the heart of the subject I closed my eyes and tried to will myself to sleep, but my mind had plans of its own. The searing kiss from the hallway presented itself as proof that this new development could not be avoided. My body heated from just the memory of his hold on me. How his hands twisted in my hair. His lips against mine, his tongue in my mouth while he pressed me back against the wall.

The alcohol must still be clouding my mind I concluded, as I flipped on my back to escape the delusions. Staring at the ceiling, a new question surfaced. Would he have continued saying no if he had driven me home?

Now the problem with considering potential outcomes of what might have happened is you will never get a satisfactory answer. So while my brain came up with several plausible ends to my evening, some pleasurable, others not so much, I knew the chance to find out was gone.

I closed my eyes and took deep breaths willing sweet slumber to relieve me. Just as I felt the first pulls of unconsciousness I realized I still had no idea what to do about Cade.

Light filtered through the windows of Kylie’s apartment. The sunshine reflected off the snow blinding me as I opened my eyes. I so should have slept in Jessie’s room, she had blinds. I turned over and buried my face in the sofa cushions and tried to find sleep again. Too late, once I was awake, I was awake.

With a groan, I reached for my phone to see the time and was surprised to find I’d made it to ten o’clock. Stiff from having slept on the sofa and a little sore from having kept my jeans on, I stretched before standing up and padding over to Kylie’s small kitchen. I spun the coffee disc holder searching for plain old coffee and popped it into the coffee maker. One of the little luxuries we afforded ourselves, we each had one cup coffee makers.

I folded my arms over my chest and waited as the hum and whir promised me caffeine in the near future. The future… I’d dodged the bullet last night, but what would happen today. Maybe he was upset that I ignored him and would let it go. I added cream and more sugar than I should have to my coffee and inhaled deeply before sipping the sweetened liquid into my mouth and sighing in satisfaction. I loved coffee.

Yes, Cade was probably pissed I’d ignored him and would not be speaking to me for the next few days. I carried my mug back to the sofa and eased back under the covers. Although I didn’t like the idea he was mad, it solved one problem at least temporarily. I would worry about Cade later.

Kylie and I had shared a dorm room for years, and as I looked around her apartment I recognized many of the trinkets she’d collected during her time with me. When I finished University and I had to move out, I couldn’t bear the thought of anymore roommates, I needed my own space. So when the time came I found a small loft style apartment I could afford and made the leap. No walls except for the bathroom made for a large open space and this morning I missed being surrounded by my things.

I set my mug down on the table, and standing I began folding up the blankets. I stuffed the pillows and blankets into the trunk and drained the rest of my coffee on the way to the kitchen before rinsing out my cup. It was time to go home, I grabbed my phone from the table content to see the rest of the night had been quiet and typed a quick text to Kylie telling her I went home. Next I called a cab and began burying myself in the layers of winter wear to avoid hypothermia.

As I headed for the door, I reminded myself why I’d chosen to hide out at my friend’s house in the first place and laughed. Sounded good last night accompanied by tequila shooters, this morning not so much. Cade would not have forced anything last night if I hadn’t wanted to. The problem was would I have wanted to?

I opened the front door then pulled it closed behind me and skipped down the few steps to the front door and waited for the cab. Today I would just relax. Stay home, get caught up on some of the shows saved in my PVR, maybe read a little of the latest romance novel I downloaded last week. I would definitely take a bath. Sunday sounded like a great day as I pushed out into the sunshine and bitter cold, hurrying towards the idling cab.

Fifteen minutes later we were turning off the main road onto the side streets that lead to my building. From inside the warmth of the car, the sunshine was nice. February was known for being the greyest and most depressing month of the year. I closed my eyes and soaked up all the vitamin D I could from the back seat of the car.

The car slowed then stopped, and when I peeked we were in front of my place. I passed the driver my debit card, paid the fare and jumped out of the cab rushing towards the heat of my apartment. I was not a winter activity kind of girl.

As I reached the entrance to the building, I heard footsteps on the path behind me and I held the door open for whichever of my neighbors had braved the elements this morning. Only it wasn’t one of my neighbors.

Cade stood inches from me, smelling fresh and clean and cold. I stepped further into the building leaving him space to let the door close behind him.

“Cade what are you doing here?”

“Waiting for you.”

“Why?”

“Pay, please don’t pretend nothing happened last night. Let’s just go inside and talk, or if you’d feel better we can go to breakfast like I planned.”

I looked down at the crumpled mess I was, there was no way I was going anywhere. Cade and I were both adults after all. We could have a mature conversation about the direction of our relationship. Of course, we could.

“Okay, Cade come in, but I need to shower.”

“Nothing new Pay, I’ll cook.”

He followed me silently up the stairs, but the weight of his stare on me was massive. My stomach fluttered, I was too warm inside my jacket, and my heart was beating too fast. My mind might have made its decision last night but apparently had forgotten to send the memo to my body. These reactions were not how one greeted a friend.

I fiddled with my keys to find the right one, nerves making me slower than usual, and let us into my apartment. I stripped off my outer layers and hung them on the hook near the door at the same time as Cade. His cologne wafted towards me catching me off guard. The fresh, clean musky scent tripped new sensory reactions. As he passed me his coat, I fought the urge to bury my face in the fabric and inhale. I was worse than a love sick teenager. Last night I blamed the alcohol but this morning what was my excuse?

I hung his jacket on the hook next to mine as he brushed past me, and an electric tingle followed where our bodies touched. Without a word he moved into the kitchen area and opened the fridge examining its contents, allowing me the perfect opportunity to ogle my best friend from behind.

Dark jeans hugged his well-defined ass and thighs.
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He’d chosen a white tight fitting V-necked t-shirt that clung to his broad shoulders and torso, showing off the detailed ridges beneath and his developed biceps. Did he choose this outfit to torment me on purpose? I tried to replace my friend filter, but there was no way to not see Cade as the virile example of a man that he was. Whatever blinders I had used up until last night, were no longer working.

Before I said or did anything I was going to regret, I called out to him. “I’m heading to the shower, I won’t be long.”

“What do you want to eat?”

“Anything,” I answered, but my mind offered
you
as an alternative.

Yup, this morning’s shower would need to be cold
. I stepped into my bathroom knowing full well that the cold shower idea was just that, an idea. I couldn’t stand anything but scalding hot showers, but I could hope that the water might clear my thoughts. Cranking the water to the maximum, I peeled off my jeans and blouse and tossed them in the hamper followed by my bra, panties, and socks. I brushed my teeth while waiting for the water to heat up.

The first jets of water soothed me as I stepped under the cascade and slid the shower door closed. With my head tilted back I, let the water cascade down around me and wrap me in its embrace. Nothing else mattered when I was here, Cade could wait, because I needed this.

My favorite shampoo sat on the shelf built into the shower wall; I grabbed the bottle and popped the flip top. The fragrance of aragon and coconut wafted from the bottle as I poured out a generous amount and massaged it through my hair. Rinsing out the suds, I repeated my actions with the conditioner and reached for my shea butter and vanilla body wash and my pouf. The creamy soap slid over me, refreshing me as I methodically traced my body with the sweet lather. The trails of water rinsed the bubbles away leaving only the hint of aroma. I replaced everything and tipped my head back submerging my face this time as well.
Better, much better.

Already I felt more capable of dealing with the problem waiting for me outside the door. I turned off the water and slid back the glass enclosure grabbing a towel from the rack when a new problem surfaced. All of my clothes were out there…Next to where Cade was. The only thing, I had in here, was a knee length silk robe. Not exactly the ideal when you are trying to be non-sexual. The only other option was to ask Cade to bring me something. Yesterday maybe I would have. Today, his searching in my panty drawer had a whole new meaning. Nope, the robe would just have to do.

The soft cotton of the towel absorbed all of the water on my skin before I wrapped it around my hair and reached for the tiny black silk robe that hung behind the door. The next purchase would be one of those fluffy unattractive terry cloth robes that made me look fat, I promised myself as I wiped the steam from the mirror to access my appearance. The thin material did very little to conceal anything really. The tips of my nipples showed through the thin fabric as did all of my curves and the slight raise where hair covered my mound.

Nope. I towel dried my hair more vigorously than required and decided I would make a mad dash to my dresser while keeping my back to him. Rush back in here get dressed,
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and then join him. With that plan in mind, I reached for the door knob and stopped in my tracks.

Cade with his tantalizing thin white t-shirt,
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sat on my sofa directly in front of my dresser with a coffee mug propped on his knee. There was no easy way to do this. It was obvious he was taunting me. Well then, we could both play this game.

I took one last deep breath as I hung the damp towel back on the rack and finger combed my hair. I stepped into his line of sight and watched his reaction. A flare heated his gaze before he was able to school his expression back to neutral. At least I wasn’t the only one suffering this morning.

“Feeling better?”

I smiled as I answered, “You have no idea. What’s for breakfast?”

As I turned and made my way across to the island, he did indeed have breakfast all laid out. My shower must have taken longer than I realized because he’d found the time to make French toast, slice apples and oranges from the fridge and lay the table. The aroma of the food made my stomach grumble reminding me it had already been several hours since I’d last eaten anything.

Cade came up behind me and pulled out one of the stools that surrounded the island and offered me the seat, then sat himself next to me.

“I must say Pay, you smell delicious.”

His fingers reached for my damp hair, and he ran them through my lengths, ending at the middle of my back. Tingles chased the trail his fingers left raising goose bumps on my skin. The air crackled with electricity... Supercharged.

“Can we talk?”

His voice was much deeper than I’d ever heard it. Both of us were under the strain of the pull between us. As I turned to face him and nodded, there was no doubt in my mind that all of my well-thought out arguments as to why I should not test my friendship with Cade were useless. Before this day ended, I knew I would be much more intimately acquainted with Cade.