A Nightingale Christmas Wish (44 page)

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Authors: Donna Douglas

BOOK: A Nightingale Christmas Wish

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‘My sister only just gave it to me,’ Effie said, still transfixed by the sight of his uniform. ‘You’re really going then?’

‘I don’t have much choice. I registered as a conscientious objector, but the tribunal threw it out. Now I have to do six months’ military training and I don’t want to go.’

Effie stared at his sullen face and thought about all the porters and medical students at the hospital, going off with cheerful stoicism to do their duty.

‘I don’t suppose anyone wants to go,’ she said.

‘I daresay you’re right.’ Adam looked abashed. ‘Thank you for coming to see me, anyway. It means such a lot to me.’

Effie glanced away so she didn’t have to look into his green eyes. ‘Adeline isn’t here then?’

‘I told you in my letter, didn’t I? She’s gone.’

‘Did you really send her away?’

He nodded. ‘I knew you were right, that Adeline was only using me, but I didn’t want to admit it. My stupid pride, I suppose.’ His mouth twisted. ‘At any rate, as soon as you left I realised my mistake. I should never have let you walk out. Can you forgive me?’

‘Yes, of course. That’s why I’m here.’

‘Really?’ His face lit up. ‘Oh, Effie, I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear you say that—’

He took a step towards her, arms outstretched, but Effie sidestepped his embrace. ‘I’ve been learning poetry,’ she said.

‘Oh, yes?’ He frowned, half amused.

‘I wanted to impress you, you see. I wanted you to think I was as cultured as you and Adeline.’

‘You didn’t have to do that.’

‘I felt I did.’ She paused. ‘I learned a new poem last night, as a matter of fact. ‘The Bargain’, by Sir Philip Sidney. Do you know it at all?
My true love hath my heart, and I have his
. . .’ she quoted the first line.

He nodded. ‘It’s one of my favourites.’

‘Mine too,’ she agreed. ‘You really feel the love in those lines, don’t you?
He loves my heart, for once it was his own. I cherish his because in me it bides.
’ She sighed at the sentiment.

‘Yes, it’s beautiful.’

‘They love each other so deeply, it’s as if they have each other’s hearts beating in their chests. They feel each other’s pain. Can you imagine loving someone like that?’

He paused a fraction too long. ‘I do,’ he answered. ‘That’s how I feel about you.’

He reached for her hands, but she pulled them away. ‘No, you don’t. You want to be in love with me, just like you wanted to be in love with Adeline. You’re desperate to love someone. But you can’t love me because you don’t know me, not really.’ She wrapped her arms around herself, suddenly cold in spite of the warmth of the day. ‘I tried so hard to be the person I thought you wanted me to be,’ she said. ‘But then I realised, if I had to change that much you couldn’t really love me.’

‘I do love you, and you don’t have to change,’ Adam insisted. ‘I love you just the way you are.’

‘No, you don’t.’

‘Then
I’ll
change. I’ll try to be the kind of man you want me to be.’

She shook her head. ‘Don’t you see, Adam? Neither of us should have to change. We should love each other just the way we are.’

His broad shoulders slumped in defeat. ‘What do you want me to do, then?’

‘Find someone who makes you truly happy. Someone whose pain means more to you than your own.’

‘That’s what I want, more than anything. That’s what I’ve always wanted.’

For the first time she allowed herself to meet his gaze. He looked so wretched, she thought with pity. Poor Adam, constantly searching for someone to love. She had thought she was the hopeless romantic, but now she could see she wasn’t the only one.

But then his petulant side reasserted itself. ‘I’m surprised you came at all, if this is all you have to say,’ he grunted.

‘I came because I wanted to say goodbye and to wish you well,’ Effie said. ‘As a friend.’

‘A friend?’ His mouth curled around the word.

She leaned forward and planted a light kiss on his cheek. For the first time he didn’t flinch, but it was too little and far too late.

‘Stay safe, Adam,’ she said.

As she turned to walk away, he called after her, ‘Wait! May I write to you?’

She shook her head. ‘Better not,’ she said.

She walked away, making sure not to look back until she reached the corner. When she did, he was still standing at the top of the stone steps, watching her, a forlorn figure in his khaki uniform.

For a moment, it was all she could do not to run back to him. But she knew it would be better for both of them if she kept walking.

My true love hath my heart, and I have his . . .
The words echoed in her mind. It hurt her so much to say goodbye. But Jess was right, she thought. She and Adam both deserved better than that.

‘You know, Mrs Durrant, I don’t think I’ve ever met a child who uses fruit as imaginatively as your son,’ David McKay said, wielding his forceps.

The woman looked offended. ‘You were the one who told me to send him to Saturday morning pictures with an apple instead of an orange,’ she accused.

‘Yes, but I didn’t expect him to stuff the core up his nose, did I?’

As he tried to extract the offending object, he was aware of Mrs Durrant’s head casting a shadow over her son’s face.

‘What if some of the pips travel right up there, Doctor?’ she asked anxiously. ‘Will they grow in his brain, do you think?’

David paused for a moment, composing himself.

‘I don’t think they’d find very fertile ground, Mrs Durrant,’ he said. ‘Or indeed any—’

He froze, forceps poised, as the door opened and Helen Dawson stood there, a calm, beautiful vision in her stiff grey dress and goffered white bonnet.

At first he thought he was seeing things, and it was all he could do not to throw down his instruments and rush over to check if she was real.

But then she smiled and said, ‘Sorry I’m late, Doctor. But I’m ready now.’

‘I don’t understand. Ready for . . .’ He stopped speaking. The glowing warmth in her dark eyes told him everything he needed to know. She was ready to take a chance, to hand him her heart and trust that he would care for it as she would his.

He cleared his throat. ‘Are you quite sure, Sister?’ he asked.

‘Very sure, sir.’

He smiled. ‘We’d better get on with it then,’ he said, picking up his forceps. ‘We’ve got a lot of lost time to make up.’

The station platform in Colchester was crowded. Soldiers, their families, wives, sweethearts, all clamouring to say goodbye. No one wanted to be the first to tear themself away.

Frannie desperately searched the crowded platform but there was no sign of John. Why had she left it so late? She didn’t even know for sure if he’d be here. For all she knew he might have already gone, could be on the shores of France by now . . .

She felt nausea rise in her throat and steadied herself. Don’t give in, she told herself. Don’t let the fear take a grip on you, not this time.

And then the crowd parted and she saw him. Standing apart from everyone else as usual, tall, handsome and strapping in his officer’s uniform, surveying the scene with narrowed, watchful eyes.

His gaze skimmed over her, then snagged on her and pulled back until they were staring directly at each other. He stood for a moment, frozen. Only his lips moved, saying her name.

The next moment Frannie was running towards him. She didn’t stop running until she was in his arms and kissing him fiercely.

The harsh blast of the whistle parted them. ‘All aboard!’ The train guard started down the platform, his flag poised.

John looked down at her. ‘I don’t know what to say,’ he murmured.

‘Me neither.’ There was so much she wanted to say, so much she wanted him to know, it would take a lifetime to say it. And with any luck, a lifetime was what they would have.

‘I brought this for you.’ She reached into her pocket, pulled out her lucky pebble and pressed it into his hand. ‘It brought you luck before, so I’m hoping it will bring you luck again.’

His fingers closed around it, holding it tight. ‘I won’t need luck,’ he said. ‘Not if I know I’ve got you waiting for me.’

The train guard gave another harsh blast on his whistle.

‘You’d better go.’

As he walked away from her, he turned and called back, ‘I will come home – I promise.’

Frannie smiled. ‘I don’t want you to come home a hero,’ she whispered. ‘Just come home safe.’

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Epub ISBN: 9781448165032

Version 1.0

www.randomhouse.co.uk

Published by Arrow Books 2014

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Donna Douglas has asserted her right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.

This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance between these fictional characters and actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

First published in Great Britain in 2014 by

Arrow Books

Random House, 20 Vauxhall Bridge Road,

London SW1V 2SA

A Penguin Random House Company