A Promised Fate (6 page)

Rory shrugged and headed towards Julia’s chair.

“Rory Cal Alexander! I’ll cut your balls clean off
and feed them to the seagulls!” The look on her face was serious
and he quickly stopped his pursuit.

“I was only joking. I would never do that,” he said,
but he would so definitely do that.

Lauren walked out of the house with perfect hair and
prefect makeup, cute heels and a brand new outfit given to her by
Ava. I held up a crisp fifty-dollar bill. Luke pushed from his
seat, pressed a kiss to my sister’s cheek, causing her to have a
face-splitting grin, and then he tossed her in the water before she
could say a single word to anyone.
Pissed
only begins to
describe the look on her face as she came out of the water looking
like a drowned rat.

For fifty bucks, Luke made my entire night and ruined
Lauren’s. He may have also ruined his own evening because Lauren
laid into him something fierce and gave him hell just as any other
Greek woman would have done.

“Ari, so help me God, if you ever do something like
that to me…”

“Baby,” I shook my head at Ava, “I would never in a
million years dream of doing something like to you.”

She smiled.

“I can’t go without sex for long, are you kidding me?
You’d hold out on me for ages.”

Her elbow flew into my gut.

Max slipped out of the house with my dad and he eased
up on Ava’s lap. We shifted to a much more appropriate
conversation.

“Rory’s middle name is Cal, too?” Ava asked and
fiddled with Max’s hands, cupping his small palm and filling it
with soft kisses. She kissed, he giggled, she kissed some more and
he laughed louder.

“Family name,” I nodded. “You didn’t know that?”

Her forehead crinkled and a cute line that was
intended to be a firm scowl set in between her eyes.

“No, I didn’t know that, Ari. Where does the name
come from? What does it mean?”

“Uh, let’s see … Cal means ‘
most beautiful
. ’
The name is Greek, obviously. Cal was my grandfather’s name on my
father’s side. Cal Alexander.”

“So
who
was he, then?” She asked with a timid
voice, careful not to upset me and I felt a sting of guilt.

“A descendant from Adonis.”

“So you are named after both of your grandfathers,
Aristotle and Cal?”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm … I like Cal.” She mused and tasted the name on
her tongue.

More kisses pressed into Max’s palm and then into his
messy hair.

“I like Cal, too. Cal is nice. The name has worked
fine for me all these years.”

Ava smiled as she looked down at her belly. My hand
was resting there. Whenever she is near me, I can’t help but touch
her, feel her. Feeling our baby move and kick is like experiencing
a divine miracle. It brings me great joy and I relish each and
every moment that I am blessed with.

“Are we agreeing on a boy name?” Ava asked
excitedly.

“We are!”

“Cal and Max,” she squeezed Max in a warm hug.

“They sound like a great, mischievous duo.”

Ava giggled merrily and happy tingles spread from my
fingers down to my toes.

The sky grew darker and darker and eventually we
moved out to the beach right in front of the water for an awesome
view of the city’s yearly show. Waves rolled in and excitement
hummed in the air. Max and a few other children his age ran along
the beach, flashlights in hand, chasing the sand crabs.

When the first bang from the fireworks rang out,
people quit talking and everyone looked out towards the sky above
the sea at the magnificent bursts of color. Max hurried to our side
and I threw him up on my shoulders. I wrapped my arms around Ava
and held her tightly. She leaned back into my chest with a
contented breath.

Everyone found peace and comfort in their loved one’s
arms. People were sneaking kisses from one another under the
beautifully lit sky. The night was perfect.

Near the edge of the grouping of our closest friends
and family, Rory and Julia stood in profound closeness. His back to
the show, he whispered in her ear in between the explosive bangs
and whatever he said to her, brought on a rush of tears and
powerful emotion.

A great big colorful finale lit up miles of skyline
and shortly after, the vibrant bursts were replaced with milky
white firework smoke and the smell of sulfur hung heavily in the
air. Max let out a giant yawn and wiggled his way down into my
arms. He rested his head on my shoulder and placed his small hand
against my cheek. The crowd of people slowly dispersed towards
their homes with lawn chairs, coolers and sleepy kids tucked under
their arms.

Thunder crashed and lightening lit up the dark night
sky. The noise was startling and Ava jumped awake with a
scream.

“It’s just a storm,” I said, calming her quickly and
quietly in between kisses pressed to the top of her head. “It’s
just a storm, calm down.
Shh
.”

She let out an unsteady breath. We were knotted
together -- our arms and legs entwined like a tied shoelace. Her
head was pillowed in the dip of my chest and her skin was hot. We
were both sweaty.

Ava let out another deep, shaky breath in an effort
to calm herself. “I was having a nightmare. Oh, God.” Another deep
breath and then, “Oh, God. It was just a nightmare.” Her speech
came rushed and panicky.

“I’m here.” I held her tighter, enveloping her in my
arms and she breathed me in, sucking the air away from my skin.
“I’m here. What was it? What were you dreaming?”

“It was so real, Ari. Promise me, promise me you’ll
never stop loving me. Not ever.”

“Whoa...,” I said and adjusted my body to look into
her face. “Not ever. Is that what you were dreaming? Me not loving
you?”

Ava’s head bobbed in a sad nod and she wiped her eyes
and nose with the back of her hand.

“Of course, I promise, Ava. I’ve built my universe
around you. Without you, my world crumbles. I won't stop loving
you. I can't. Not ever.” I lifted her chin to look into her eyes.
“Tell me your dream. Talk me through it and you’ll see just how
silly a bit of imagination it was ... an absurd and irrational
fabrication.”

Her face pinched. “I don’t think I want to talk about
it.”

“You sure? It helps to talk -- you know it
helps.”

“I can’t.”

“Ava, please. Don’t shut me out.”

“I’m not, Ari. I just don’t want to think about that
dream anymore. I want it out of my head. I can’t bear the
thought…”

“Ok, ok. Shh. All that matters is that I am here and
I love you. My finger tapped on her chest just above her heart.
“You hold my heart in here, Ava. How could I live without it?”

Her lips pressed into mine and I tasted the flavor of
her salty tears on my tongue. Her hands searched my body and our
heartbeats blended and pounded in time with one another.

“Ari, I…” She pressed herself back against my chest
to look at me.

“What, Baby? Tell me.”

“I…” Her eyes were wet with unshed tears.

“Mama!” Max screamed loudly from his bedroom and the
sound echoed through the monitor.

Ava pushed off me, untangled her body from my limbs
and the blankets, then was up and out of our room and into Max’s in
a flash.

“Shh, sweet boy, I’m here.” She shushed and hushed
him and then calmed Max down by reading his favorite story.

“Llama Llama…” she started, and I leaned back against
a pile of pillows with the new tiny and soft baby blanket draped
over me. I listened to the story being told in her gentle voice
through the baby monitor. Thunder continued to crash outside and
our house shook with the vibration. Eventually, Ava’s words drifted
away and I knew the two of them had fallen back asleep
together.

I stayed awake, my eyes focusing in and out on the
ceiling above me. I sometimes cannot sleep without her. For months
after I met Ava but before we were intimate, I struggled with
insomnia. I saw her and I loved her with an intensity that was hard
to fathom. Now that I belong to her, every part of me needs every
part of her. I need her like I need air. I’m restless without her
near me. Her presence calms my soul and stops the near-constant
noises in my head, nagging noises reminding me constantly of the
filth in my blood. Without Ava the walls close in around me. The
mere idea of no longer having her to love makes my stomach heave
with nausea. I pushed out of bed to go for her and bring her back
to me.

The wind howled and rain pounded on our rooftop,
smacking against the glass. Palm trees danced wickedly with each
gust and cast elongated ghostlike figures on the walls. The nearby
white-capped waves crashed angrily and pummeled the shore with
rage; sprays of seawater hissed and thunder reverberated, shaking
our windows and causing our picture frames to vibrate against the
walls.

Through the chaos in the dead of night came the near
silent
swoosh
of our glass door sliding open. My scalp
prickled and tiny hairs on my arms and the back of my neck stood up
on high alert. Someone was entering our home uninvited. Standing in
our upstairs corridor, my hand gripped the stairwell banister in a
tight, white-knuckled squeeze. My gaze, struggling with the dark,
picked out and followed a tall, slender figure gliding in through
the door and into our kitchen.

A small bit of relief came to me as the visitor slid
out of wet shoes at the door mat. This was someone we knew, someone
who knew us well enough to know and follow Ava’s exacting house
rules.

“Hello?” I called out.

A gasp echoed quietly in the night, barely audible
from the storm that raged on outside.

“I know you’re there, Jules. What are you doing here
so late?” I called out from the top floor. She turned around and
searched the dark house for me. The sound of my footsteps as I came
down the stairs gave my location away and her eyes caught my
movement in the dark moonlight. Her gaze followed me as I
approached her.

“What do you need, Julia? It’s late. Rory is probably
in an agony of worry. Let me drive you home…”

Lightning struck the ocean with a magnificent crackle
and the blackened house flashed with a brilliant, bright light,
giving me my first real glimpse of her. Her skin was ashen despite
the weekend spent in the California sun. Her hair was wet and her
clothing was too. She had on a dark, hooded, unzipped sweatshirt
with a pair of Rory’s boxers and a tank top of his that was
entirely too loose on her thin frame. She was cold and tears
streamed down her cheeks and clouded her eyes.

“Julie Baby, what’s wrong?”

She fell against me, throwing her arms around my
body. She let go of whatever strength she had been holding on to
and sobbed savagely into my chest.

“You haven’t called me that in a long time,” she
said, sniffling and nudging herself closer to me, tightening her
cold, wet arms around my bare body. “You’re so warm.” She held me
even tighter still. “You are always so warm.”

“Are you alright?”

“I am now.” She breathed me in just as Ava does,
sucking the air away from my skin with need.

I pulled back from Julia’s grip on me and held her
shoulders an arm’s length away. I studied her.

“You’re freezing. Why are you here so late? Does Rory
know you left the condo? He’ll be worried, Jules. This storm is too
dangerous to be caught out in. Let me call him and then I can drive
you home.”

She let out shiver and her teeth chattered. “No!
Don’t tell him anything.”

A heavy sigh left my lungs and my mouth pulled into a
deep frown. “Stay put for a second.”

Down the hall, on the other side of the kitchen, was
our laundry room, which had become a sort of adjunct closet for
Ava. It housed a bunch of stuff that didn't fit her new
baby-carrying shape along with some other odds and ends that had
taken up semi-permanent residence. I found a pair of her running
shorts and an old DPI tee-shirt. On top of the dryer was a folded
stack of beach towels and in the dryer was a forgotten-about load
of wrinkly whites. Yanking out an undershirt, I pulled it on over
my head, and took the shorts, tee-shirt and towel to Julia.

“Put these on and give me your wet clothes.”

Standing before me, Julia removed the sweatshirt and
then crossed her arms at her waist and pulled at the hem of her wet
tank, removing her shirt in one swift move. I shifted uncomfortably
and looked everywhere but at her. She flopped the wet tank in my
open palm and exchanged it for Ava’s dry tee-shirt. She did the
same with the shorts while I fidgeted.

“Done?” I asked when Rory’s wet boxers joined the
tank top in my hand.

“Done. At ease, Ari, I don’t have anything that you
haven’t seen before.” Julia grabbed the towel and ran it vigorously
through her sopping wet hair.

She followed me into the kitchen and I dumped her wet
things into the sink, then turned to look at her, crossing my arms
over my chest.

“What are you doing here at three in morning?”

She climbed onto a stool and fidgeted with Max’s
sticky toy dinosaur.

“I’ve … It’s just,” and she started to cry again in a
choking sob. Scrambling for a tissue, I had to settle for a roll of
toilet paper from the guest bath down the hall.

“I had no idea this was going to happen. Ari, I am so
sorry.”

“Ok, what is happening? And why are you sorry?”
Chills crept up my spine.

“You would do anything for me right, Ari?”

I didn’t answer her.

“
I
would … I would do anything for
you
.
You and I have been through a lot together. I … you mean so much to
me. We have a bond that no one else has. When my parents died, you
were the only one I would talk to -- remember? It was just you and
me. I was so scared of everything, so scared that those men were
coming back to kill me. I was so terrified in the dark at night
that I would hide under my bed, but you always found me, and you
would crawl under there with me with a flashlight and sometimes you
would…” she sniffled and wiped tears away from her cheeks. “You
would read to me. Remember? You probably read me
The Lord of the
Flies
more than fifty times.” She laughed in spite of her
tears.