Read A Real Cowboy Never Walks Away (Wyoming Rebels Book 4) Online
Authors: Stephanie Rowe
Lissa took a deep breath and lifted her chin. "We couldn't wait for you anymore, Rand. We had to build a life."
"I see that now." Rand leaned back in the chair, and looked at her. "You're not the girl I left."
When he said it, Lissa suddenly realized it was true. At some point over the last nine years, she'd changed. She'd become strong. Independent. She'd raised a kid. She'd saved up enough money to buy the café from the retiring and generous original owner, who'd given her a waitress job when she'd first moved to town. She'd fallen in love...with Travis. Back then, she'd been desperate for Rand's love, so unable to love herself that she was willing to take whatever she could get from a man.
But now, she didn't need a man to love her or rebuild her self-worth.
Now, she loved not out of desperation, but out of strength.
But she loved a man who couldn't commit emotionally. He travelled a lot for his job. Was she strong enough to handle that? To watch him walk away and believe he would come back? And that was assuming he even decided to try. Maybe he wouldn't. Maybe he'd just walk away, like Rand had, and never look back. Then what?
Rand looked at her. "Do you love Travis? Is Bridgette correct?"
It would probably be best if she didn't. God, she was in love with another man who was going to leave, who'd made it clear that he couldn't be in that kind of a relationship? Really? But she was. Any love she had for Rand was gone, faded over the years, until it was simply a faint memory. Unlike Travis. Not faint. Not at all. She lifted her chin, thinking of what Chase had said, that she'd have to fight for Travis. Was he right? Would it work? Was that what she wanted in a man?
"Lis? Do you love him?" Rand leaned forward, searching her face.
She sighed, and nodded. "Yes. I do." The words sent a chill down her spine, but at the same time, warmth seemed to flood her. A bright, sunshiny warmth that seemed to pour into the depths of her being, cradling her from all the cold that had held her in its grips for so long. She loved Travis.
She loved him.
She really and truly loved him.
A muscle in Rand's cheek ticked. "Does he love you?"
She thought of how Travis had sent his brothers to help her. Of how he'd sat in his car for hours, tormented by his need to be with her. She thought of how he'd bonded with Bridgette...and what Chase had said about him. She realized she knew the answer. "Yes," she said softly. "He does." He didn't need to say the words. Maybe he never could. But he did.
Rand sighed. "I knew it that night I stopped in." He looked at her, and for the first time, she didn't see the face of the man who'd broken her heart. She saw the face of the man who'd given her an amazing daughter, and who'd forced her to become the woman she was meant to be. "If you ever change your mind about him, let me know."
She smiled. "What we had was long ago, Rand. Neither of us are the same person anymore. We can't go backward."
Rand sighed. "I know." He stood up and walked over to her, tracing his finger down her jaw. "Sorry I wasn't the man you deserved, but I swear I'll try to do right by Bridgette."
She nodded. "I can tell. Thank you. You can stop by whenever you're in town." It felt so good to say those words, to face the fear that had been dogging her for so many years, fear that Rand would someday show up and try to take Bridgette from her. All that was gone now, and she knew things were going to be okay with Rand, however they worked out. It would take time, and she knew things would get more complicated for Bridgette as she got older, but the first step had been taken, and it was in the right direction.
"I appreciate that." He hesitated, then pulled out a folded piece of paper. "Here."
She took it, frowning as she opened it. It was a check, for a sum of money that made her breath catch. "What is this?"
"Child support for the last eight years." He met her stunned gaze. "You've done amazing alone, Lissa, but it's my job to back you up. I've been a shitty dad in every way, but I don't want to be that guy anymore. This is the start. You'll get money every month for her."
Her fingers tightened on the check. With that money, she'd be able to do so much. Guitar lessons for Bridgette. Cowboy boots. She'd finally get to start a college fund, so Bridgette could get the college education she'd never had. "Thank you."
"No, thank you, for giving me the chance to get to know my kid, when I did everything possible not to deserve it." He held out his arms.
She smiled and hugged him, a hug that seemed to chase away years of pain, loneliness, and trauma. She took a deep breath, and leaned into him, a man she no longer wanted, hated, or feared.
The front door jangled, and she turned her head, looking past his shoulder as she opened her mouth to tell the customer that the café was closed until three, but her words died in her throat.
Travis was standing in the doorway, watching her and Rand embrace.
T
he sight
of Lissa hugging Rand made Travis stop dead. He was thrust back into his past, into the memories of the betrayal that had devastated him such a short time ago, of the woman who'd claimed to love him when she'd really loved another.
Lissa's face was stricken with shock, and she froze in Rand's embrace.
Rand turned around to see who was there, and his face darkened when he saw Travis.
Son of a bitch. He'd lost her. He was too late.
Travis's fists clenched, and for a long moment, he just stood there, fighting against his instinct to shut down, spin around, and walk away, to leave her with the man she'd said she didn't love.
It would be so easy to leave. To not care. To just fucking walk away.
Except he did care. He cared with every fiber of his stained heart. His heart was thundering, sweat was beading on his forehead, and his hands were shaking. Darkness swirled around him, the darkness that had been at bay since he'd come back to Rogue Valley and met her.
Her hands were on Rand's shoulders, and Rand's arms were around her waist. Intimate. Private.
Jesus.
Travis had thought that he'd felt pain before. He really did. But nothing hurt like it did right now. The pain seemed to thunder from deep inside him, pouring through him like a violent storm, lightning searing every cell as it passed through.
"Travis?" Her hands fell away from Rand's shoulders, but her face was still pale. "What are you doing here?"
Her question hung in the air. He heard the hesitation in her voice, the fear...fear of being caught in the arms of another man? But there was something else in her voice. Another tone. Another emotion. One he couldn't quite identify.
He searched her face, those brown eyes that he'd lost himself in so many times. "Say it again," he said. "Ask me again."
Her eyebrows knit together in that adorable way that made his gut tighten. "Why are you here?"
He heard it this time. Hope. That's what was in her voice.
Hope.
Hope that he'd come back? Hope that he was standing in her café, when he'd promised never to return? Hope that he was there to give her money? Hope that he was there because she couldn't live without him, regardless of the size of his bank account? Jesus. How could he trust her? All he'd learned was not to give anyone the chance to hurt him. That was all he knew.
Lissa pulled away from Rand, saying something quietly to him, something that only Rand could hear. Secrets between lovers? Between ex-lovers? Between enemies? What? God help him,
what
?
Lissa walked across the café toward Travis, her sneakers almost silent on the old floor. She stopped in front of him, not touching him, but gazing at him intently, not looking away. "Travis," she said softly. "Talk to me."
"My mom." The words came out unintentionally. He hadn't come here to talk about her.
"Your mom? What about her?" Lissa frowned, her brows furrowed.
"She found me. I hadn't seen her since I was six. She asked me for money." Why was he talking about his mother? Why the fuck was that woman on his mind, when he was standing in front of the only woman who'd ever made him feel good? He couldn't seem to make himself say what he'd come to say. It was too much. Too terrifying. Too important.
Lissa's face softened with such understanding that his throat tightened. "Oh, Travis. I'm so sorry. She—"
"No." He interrupted. "I don't want to talk about her. I didn't come here to talk about her." God, he felt like he could barely even articulate the words. Like he could barely speak. "I love you." The words were thick and heavy, tangling over each other like a newborn foal's gangly, knobby legs.
A smile touched Lissa's face, the kind of beautiful, riveting smile that seemed to blossom from deep inside. "Really?"
Behind her, Rand cleared his throat, but suddenly, Travis didn't care. Maybe she shared a kid with Rand. Maybe she'd loved him. Maybe she still did. But dammit, he didn't want to lose her, not to Rand, not to his own fear, not to anything.
Travis took her hands, surprised that his were no longer trembling. He pulled them to his chest, holding them against his heart. "I've lived in darkness and fear since the day I was born. I've been sprinting every second of every day, trying to stay ahead of it so it doesn't consume me. The night I walked into your café, I thought I'd lost the battle. Until you smiled at me. Until you showed me your weariness. Until you showed me your heart, your truth, and your courage."
Tears filled her eyes. "Travis—"
"No, I need to say this. I need to finish." He cleared his throat, still searching her face, desperate to see his love mirrored in her eyes. "I didn't know how to love, not even my own brothers. But you changed that. You showed me how to find that part of me that had never been able to breathe before." He dropped to his knees, thudding to the wood floor as he looked up at her, still holding her hands to his heart. "It's not just that I love you, Lissa. You're my sunshine, my strength, my softness, and my music. You make me want to sing again, to smile, to laugh, to love. When I'm away from you, I can't even think."
A tear trickled down her cheek, and his heart leapt. Tears of joy? Tears of love?
He was almost finished. "It wouldn't be easy, putting up with me. I have a lot to learn, and many ghosts that still haunt me. I have to finish out this tour, because kids have already bought tickets, and I owe them, but when it's over, I want to be with you and Bridgette. I want to work together with the three of us to find a way to keep my music alive in a way that keeps me in town." He tightened his grip on her hands. "I need you, Lissa. I need you, my brothers, my music, and that brilliant daughter of yours who gave me back my music. I..." Shit. What else? "And I'm sorry for pushing you away. I just—"
"No." She put her fingers over his lips, silencing him. "Just stop."
Stop? His heart seemed to freeze in his chest.
Just stop?
He stopped, stunned, devastated.
Until she knelt in front of him, so she was eye level with him. "No apologies, Travis. It's all part of the journey. It's okay."
He searched her face. "It is? Okay?" He knew he was so broken, so screwed up, but...that was okay with her? She understood? "I love you."
She smiled, this time a smile so bright he felt it break the ice that had frozen around his heart. She linked her arms behind his neck. "You have to make me a promise."
"Anything. Shit, anything." Was he really getting a chance? Was she really going to forgive him?
"You can't ever walk away from me again. You can't ever choose to shut me out when you get upset. You have to talk to me about it. If I give you my heart, you have to take care of it. It's really strong, but it's also super fragile, and you could break it into a thousand pieces with a single word."
He framed her face, letting her see into his heart. "I'm in, Lissa. Forever. I give you my absolute promise that I will protect your heart every minute of every day for the rest of our lives."
"And Bridgette's?"
"Hell, yeah, of course, Bridgette's."
Her face lit up, her face radiating with so much love that he knew the words even before she said them. "I love you, Travis."
He grinned, suddenly wanting to sweep her off her feet and dance her around the room, singing songs just for the two of them. "I thought I'd blown it."
"Never. I was going to hunt you down. Chase said you'd never fight for me, so I decided I was going to do the fighting for both of us." She beamed at him. "Turns out, he was wrong."
"Dead wrong." Then he bent his head and kissed her, the kind of kiss that people wrote songs about. A kiss that was a forever kind of kiss. A kiss that was a forever kind of love. A kiss that was laughter, joy, and trust.
The kind of kiss he'd never wanted...until he'd walked into the Wildflower Café and met the woman who was going to save him.
T
ravis was early
.
Two days early.
But he felt like it was a decade late.
He hit the gas, driving a little too fast as he sped along the snowy road toward Martha and Gary Keller's house, where the Stockton clan would be bunking down for Sunday night dinner. It was almost nine o'clock, and he knew they'd be over with dinner, and feasting on the dessert that Lissa would have brought...some sort of amazing pie, probably apple.
The same apple pie that had hit number one on all the charts after he'd released the song, which Bridgette had titled "Pie Heaven." He was pretty sure that Bridgette's voice on the song was what had driven it to the top, not his own. That had been the best day ever, recording it with her in the studio he'd already had built in town, the studio that was already working with the youth from the picnic, Nick, and his band on their songs, helping them refine their sound.
He turned the truck into the long driveway, grinning when he saw that all the vehicles were still in the driveway, tucked up against the massive snowdrifts. Chase, and his family. Steen and Erin. Zane, Taylor, and their kids. And Lissa. Her old pickup truck was parked right next to the front door, in the spot of honor…but she had new tires, badass snow tires that he'd bought for her when winter had arrived. She hadn't let him buy her a new truck, but she'd accepted the tires when she'd realized how damn worried he was about the idea of her tackling the Wyoming winter on crappy tires.
He slammed on the brakes, ditched his truck behind Chase's, then sprinted across the snowy driveway, barely even noticing the frigid air as it sliced across his face. He vaulted up the front steps and opened the door, not bothering to knock, or wait, or be polite.
Loud conversation was coming from the dining room, but he saw Bridgette, Luke, and Toby in the family room, apparently playing some sort of game with foam balls and the couch. A fire was roaring in the fireplace, filling the room with the rich, warm scent of crackling wood. "Hey," he whispered, ducking in, holding his finger to his lips to tell them to stay quiet.
Bridgette whirled around. Her face lit up, and she shrieked, barreling across the room to throw herself into his arms. He laughed, sweeping her up in a giant hug. "How's my girl?"
He high-fived the boys, who were grinning goofily at him, still a little star struck. He was going to have to work on that, he decided. Maybe bring them into the studio for a tour and see if they wanted to make music.
"Awesome!" Bridgette wrapped her arms around his neck. "Mom said you were coming home Tuesday! But it's Sunday!"
"I wanted to surprise her," he whispered, pulling a small velvet box out of his pocket. "Check out the birthday present I'm giving her." He set it in her hand, grinning as she gave him a wide-eyed look of awe.
She gave a little shriek and opened it, her mouth dropping open when she saw the glittering diamond ring inside. She looked up quickly. "You're going to ask her to marry you?"
"Yeah. You think she'll say yes?" He knew that Lissa understood his commitment to her, but he'd wanted to wait to officially ask her until he was finished with his tour. He'd wanted to give her time to change her mind, to decide he was too much to deal with, but she'd never wavered in her support or her love, and he knew it was time to put himself out there.
Bridgette giggled. "She better, right?"
"Right." He hugged her and set her down, taking it back from her. He held it to the boys. "What do you think?"
They peered at it, and Toby looked at him. "You're really going to ask her to marry you?"
"Yeah. I am." He paused. "You think that's a good idea?"
Both boys grinned. "Oh, yeah," Luke said. "She's really nice."
Travis grinned, well aware how wary the boys were about trusting anyone. It didn't surprise him that Lissa had won them over. He straightened his hat. "Okay, I'm going in. Don't tell her, okay?"
"You bet!" Bridgette took off toward the dining room, and the boys hurried after her, leaving Travis alone.
He took a deep breath. This was it. The moment when it would become official. The moment when he let the entire world know that his heart was in Rogue Valley, with the woman he loved.
He snapped the box shut, then turned and walked toward the dining room.
* * *
L
issa propped
her chin on her hands, grinning as she listened to Chase's story about how he, Zane, and Steen had nearly been arrested at the high school's homecoming football game. Dane Wilson, the current sheriff, and a regular fixture at the Sunday dinners, was lamenting the sheriff's decision not to throw them in jail, but she could tell that he didn't mean it.
Dane was as much a Stockton as if he had the same last name, and she loved getting to know him. She loved getting to know all of them. Dating Travis hadn't just given her the man she loved. It had given her his family, a loyal, intense, completely screwed up family that she loved more every day.
Martha leaned over and elbowed her. "You nervous?"
Lissa glanced at her. "About what?"
"Travis coming home. Two days, right? His tour is over?"
Excitement bubbled up inside her. "Yes. He gets in around dinner time."
"How do you feel about that?" Martha eyed her.
Lissa laughed. "Oh, come on, Martha. I'm not going to break his heart. I want him to come home. I'm excited to see him." But even as she said it, she couldn't hide the wave of nervousness. What if it was different when he was back for good? They'd seen each other a lot, and he'd doubled up some shows so he could fly back for a day here and there. He'd made her feel special and amazing, even when he'd been away. She loved him a thousand times more than when he'd left, and she knew he felt the same way, but still...how would it be to see him, knowing she wasn't going to have to say good-bye this time?
Awkward? Exciting?
"Mom!" Bridgette came bounding in from the family room, her face glowing. "How ya doin'?"
Lissa raised her brows. "Great. How are you?"
"Quite spectacular." Bridgette kept standing there, grinning at her. Waiting.
For what? "Everything okay?"
Bridgette's smile widened. "Oh, yes. Quite." Her gaze flicked behind Lissa, and her face lit up.
At that moment, Martha also looked past Lissa, and she smiled. Then Chase turned his head, and then Zane, and then their wives, and Dane, all of them looking behind her.
Her heart suddenly started to pound, and Lissa spun around in her chair.
Standing in the doorway was Travis.
Her heart leapt, and before she knew it, she was on her feet, racing across the room. He caught her as she threw herself into his arms, his deep laughter rolling through her. His arms were tight around her, his body muscular and hard. He kissed her, hard and deep, a long, slow kiss that made butterflies leap through her belly.
By the time he broke the kiss, she was completely lost to him, this amazing man. She smiled up at him, drinking in the sight of his familiar eyes, his familiar scent, and the heat of his body. She realized all her nervousness had been silly. This was her man, her foundation, her home.
He grinned at her, his face rough with whiskers. "Hi."
She smiled. "Hi."
"Happy Birthday."
Her smile widened. "It's not until tomorrow."
"I know, but some things can't wait." He set her back, his smile fading. "Now that I'm back for good, things need to be different."
Behind her, Bridgette giggled. Lissa raised her eyebrows. "What kind of things?"
"Important things. Like your fashion sense."
"My...fashion sense?" She looked down at her jeans, cowboy boots, and Wildflower Café sweatshirt. "I thought you think I look adorable."
"You do, but it's too...plain."
She narrowed her eyes at him, trying to figure out what he was getting at. "You don't seriously want me to dress up like one of those women who asks you to sign her breasts, do you?"
He grimaced. "Hell, no. I just think you need to be a little more...sparkly."
Bridgette giggled again, and suddenly, Lissa's heart began to pound. "Sparkly?" she echoed, her voice squeaking.
"Yeah. Sparkly." He set her back, and then went down on one knee, the same way he had so many times since she'd known him. But this time, instead of reeling with angst, he was grinning, his eyes dancing. "I gave you time to decide if I was too much to deal with, but you're still here."
A thick lump formed in her throat. "I'm not going to leave you, Travis."
"I know." He held up a velvet box. "And I'm not going to leave you. Will you marry me, Lissa McIntyre?"
Tears welled in her eyes, and suddenly, she couldn't talk. She just nodded and threw her arms around him. He laughed, holding her tightly as the room erupted with cheers. He kissed her again, and then Bridgette tackled them, shrieking and laughing. Travis pulled Bridgette into the hug, and held them both tight, a solid rock that would never let them go, never fail them.
"Show her the ring," Bridgette said, her eyes dancing. "Mom, put on the ring!"
Lissa disentangled herself from her daughter, still laughing, as Travis held up the box. "I don't think she wants the ring, Bridge. Maybe you should have it."
"Hey!" Lissa laughed and snatched it out of his hand. "Don't be giving away my ring before I even get a chance to—" She opened the box, and then forgot to speak, stunned into silence.
"You don't like it?" Travis sounded worried. "We can pick out something else."
"No," she whispered. "It's beautiful." Carefully, almost afraid to touch something so exquisite, she pulled it out of the box. Diamonds lined the band, and the center cut solitaire was framed by smaller diamonds cut to look like petals of a flower. Her ring was the blossom of a wildflower. She looked at up at him. "You had this made for me?"
"Of course. We met at the café, so I wanted the flowers to be a part of it." He still looked worried. "What's wrong?"
"It's just..." She stared at the ring. "I think that diamond is as big as one of my apple pies."
He laughed then, and Bridgette giggled. "You're marrying a country music superstar, sweetheart. That's one of the perks of putting up with me." He took the ring and slid it over her finger. "Perfect."
She looked down at her hand in his, with the diamond sparkling like a star that had come down to rest on her hand. How far she'd come from the homeless, pregnant seventeen-year-old reviled by her town. She looked up, into the smiling faces of the two people she loved more than anything else in the world, and she knew that everything she'd ever endured had been perfect, because it had brought her here, to this moment, anchored in love, acceptance, and family.
She'd found her home, in the arms of the man who needed her as much as she needed him. And…more importantly, he loved her as much as she loved him.
* * *