A Scone To Die For (Oxford Tearoom Mysteries ~ Book 1) (24 page)

I jerked back from her. A man next to me hesitated, then leaned over and gently rolled her onto her back. We all saw the truth before he spoke, his voice hoarse with horror.

“She’s dead.”

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Biscuit
– small, hard, baked product, either savoury or sweet
(American: cookies. What is called a “biscuit” in the U.S. is more similar to the English scone)

Blimey –
an expression of astonishment

Bloody –
very common adjective used as an intensifier for both positive and negative qualities (e.g. “bloody awful” and “bloody wonderful”), often used to express shock or disbelief (“Bloody Hell!”)

Bollocking
– a strong reprimand, a telling-off.

Bugger! –
an exclamation of annoyance

Bum
– the behind
(America: butt)

Cheers
– a casual greeting used for both thanks and farewell

Cock-up
– a terrible mistake, to make a mess of a situation

Dishy –
handsome, attractive (used for men)

Fib
– to tell a lie (usually small, white lies), also used as a noun

Full on –
intent, relentless (usually in the context of “very busy”)

Git
– someone despicable who has taken advantage of you

Knackered
- exhausted

Lie-in
– to sleep /stay in bed later than your usual waking time

Loo
– toilet

Mug
– face

Mugging
– an assault and robbery in a public place

Packed lunch
– home-made lunch packed into a bag or lunchbox to take to school or work.

Peaky
– tired, pale,

Pillock
– an idiot, a stupid person

Plonker
– an annoying idiot

Poxy
– riddled with pox, third-rate

Prat
– idiot, often a superior, condescending one

Punter
- colloquial term for a paying guest or customer, particularly in a pub

Rotter
- someone to be regarded with contempt

Run-in
– a confrontation

Scrounge
– to try and obtain something (typically food or money) at the expense of others or by stealth

Shag
– (v) to have sexual intercourse with or (n) the act

Smarmy
– behaving with a superior attitude

Shandy –
beer mixed in equal parts with a soft drink, usually lemonade, ginger beer, apple juice

Sod
–
a term used to describe someone foolish, idiotic or unfortunate. Can be used in both a contemptuous manner (“He’s a lazy old sod!”) or in an affectionate or pitying way (“Poor sod—he never saw it coming.”)

Swine –
(pig)
someone to be regarded with contempt

Telly
– television

Tosser
– a despicable person

Willy
– penis

Wind someone up
– to tease somebody and get them agitated on purpose

Yob
– rude, uncouth, thuggish person, often used by snobs to describe the lower classes (It was coined in 18
th
century England as part of the fad amongst upperclasses to speak backwards. Formed by spelling 'boy' backwards)

Yonks
– a long time, “ages”

***

Special terms used in Oxford University:

College -
one of thirty or so institutions that make up the University; all students and academic staff have to be affiliated with a college and most of your life revolves around your own college: studying, dining, socialising. You are, in effect, a member of a College much more than a member of the University. College loyalties can be fierce and there is often friendly rivalry between nearby colleges. The colleges also compete with each other in various University sporting events.

Don / Fellow –
a member of the academic staff / governing body of a college
(equivalent to “faculty member” in the U.S.)
– basically refers to a college’s tutors. “Don” comes from the Latin,
dominus
—meaning lord, master.

D.Phil –
Doctor of Philosophy, the equivalent degree to a Ph.D at other universities.
** at Oxford, one “reads” a subject, one doesn’t take it—for example, someone might ask what subject you took and you would say, “I read History at Magdalen.”

Formal Hall –
three-course
formal evening meal in the college dining hall, with a dress code: gowns must be worn, together with jacket and tie for men, smart outfit for women. The meal is preceded by the banging of the gravel and the reading of college grace in Latin. Some colleges have Formal Hall every evening whereas others only have it on certain nights of the week.

Fresher –
a new student who has just started his first term of study; usually referring to First Year undergraduates but can also be used for graduate students.

Gown –
formal black academic robe worn by students and staff, particularly during Formal Hall, Examinations and during Matriculation and Graduation. There are various types of gowns: the simplest is the short, sleeveless Commoner gown which all Freshers start with; if you have shown outstanding achievement in your first year, you then receive a University scholarship and can change to the longer, bat-winged Scholar’s gown.

K.A. –
the King’s Arms, one of the most popular student pubs in Oxford

High Table –
refers to both the table and the actual dinner for the dons of a college and their guests. Often situated at one end of the dining hall.

Matriculation
– the ceremony at the Sheldonian Theatre when a student is officially conferred membership of the University of Oxford. Usually takes place in the student’s first term, at the end of the first week in Michaelmas Term—however there are additional ceremonies at the end of Michaelmas and also Hilary and Trinity Term. You must matriculate within two terms of starting your course, otherwise you will be unable to take a University examination.

Michaelmas Term
– the first term in the academic year (autumn), followed by Hilary Term (spring) and Trinity Term (summer).

Noughth Week
– Oxford terms are shorter than at other universities and can be very intense; they are divided into eight weeks with a Week 0 or “Noughth Week” coming just before the start of Full Term (when official teaching begins). During Noughth Week, students usually arrive, settle into their rooms, organise things like their gowns and
sub fusc
, their bicycles, and other things for student life, and there may be some social events, especially for the Freshers.

Porter’s Lodge –
a room next to the college gates which holds the porters’ offices and also the “pigeon holes”—cubby holes where the internal University mail is placed and notes for students can be left by their friends.

Quad –
short for quadrangle: a square or rectangular courtyard inside a college; walking on the grass is usually not allowed.

S.C.R. –
the Senior Common Room, for the Fellows

Sent Down
– to be forcibly expelled by the University or College authorities. At Oxford University, you always “come up” at the start of term and “go down” at the end of term, regardless of the actual geography of your home town in relation to Oxford.

Sub-fusc
–
full academic dress worn during all formal University ceremonies, including Examinations, Matriculation and Graduation; consists of your gown, mortar board and for men, a dark suit with a white collared shirt, bow tie and black shoes, for women, a dark skirt with white collared shirt, black ribbon and black shoes and stockings. 

***

Scones have a long history, originating in Scotland in the 16th Century, and are said to have taken their name from the Stone of Destiny where Scottish kings were once crowned. They are a “quick bread”, a bit similar to Southern “biscuits” in the United States. The original version was triangular-shaped, made with oats and griddle-baked rather than baked in the oven. They have since become one of the highlights of British baking—no traditional English afternoon tea would be complete with warm scones with jam and clotted cream!

A great debate rages in the United Kingdom over the correct way to pronounce “scone”—those in the North say it should rhyme with “cone” whilst those in the South insist that it should rhyme with “gone”. Meanwhile, people have come to blows over whether you should put the cream on first and then jam… or the jam on first and then the cream!

There is now a huge variety of scones, both sweet and savoury, made with dried fruit, nuts, vegetables, cheese, chocolate chips—and even a recipe with lemonade! This is a recipe for a traditional English plain scone, but it can be modified with the addition of your favourite treats.

INGREDIENTS:

•              500g of plain flour
(U.S.: 4 cups)

•              4 teaspoons of
double-acting
baking powder
*

•              ½ cup of caster sugar

•              125g of butter, at room temperature
(U.S.: 1 stick)

•              150ml of full fat milk
(U.S.: 2/3 cup - may need slightly more if dough is too dry)

•              2 eggs beaten lightly

•              egg & milk for the “egg wash” to glaze the scones

*
“double-acting” baking powder contains both cream of tartar and baking soda and causes the dough to rise only
after
heat is applied. If you use single-acting baking powder (which rises immediately), then you must not leave the dough to “rest” but must cut the scones and bake them immediately.

INSTRUCTIONS:

1)              Pre-heat the oven to 205C / 400F.

2)              Sieve the flour and baking powder into a large mixing bowl (this is important to add more “air” to the mixture).

3)              Rub the butter into the flour mixture with your fingers – it is important to coat the flour with butter as much as possible. Keep doing this until the mixture has a consistency of fine breadcrumbs.

4)              Add the sugar to the mixture and mix well with your fingers.

(This is the stage when you can add in extra ingredients such as raisins and currants, if you wish.)

5)              Add the egg and some of the milk—do not add all the milk at once; go slow and check that the dough does not become too wet otherwise the scones will “drop”.

6)              Mix well with your fingers until the dough forms a ball.

7)              Tip the dough out onto a floured board, scatter some more flour on top, and then knead lightly. Very important not to over-work the dough otherwise the scones will become very hard.

8)              When the dough looks smooth, gently pat it out (or use a rolling pin) into a thick slab, about 1 – 1.5 inches thick. This is one of the secrets to great scones—not rolling the dough out too thinly.

(The dough should now be rested for at least 30 minutes—unless you are using a single-acting baking powder. Some chefs say that resting the dough for hours, even overnight, is the secret to getting really light, fluffy scones.)

9)              Using a cutter of your choice, stamp out the scones from the dough. Be careful not to twist the cutter as you are pressing it down—only twist it gently at the very bottom to free it. Roll up the leftover dough and spread it out again—keep cutting out scones until you have used up all the mixture.

10)              Place the cut rounds onto the greased baking tray or baking paper.

11)              Brush the tops with the egg & milk wash—this will give them a lovely golden glaze.

12)              Bake in the hot oven for about 12 – 15 minutes.

13)              Cool the scones on a wire rack.

14)              Serve warm with some jam and butter or clotted cream!

Enjoy!

***