A Tender Touch: A Donnelley Brother's Novel (Logan Point Book 4) (9 page)

BOOK: A Tender Touch: A Donnelley Brother's Novel (Logan Point Book 4)
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I vaguely remembered Luke telling me he was going to take a shower, and I hadn’t seen him since, so I assumed he was doing just that. Slowly, I spun around in his kitchen, for the first time since I had entered his house, I was seeing it.

I had been expecting it to resemble the house Kami had described to me when she’d announced every nook and cranny that Kyle’s house had - but it didn’t. Actually, it was entirely different.

Luke’s house was big, but it wasn’t so big that it lost its cozy-cabin-feel comfort. The walls weren’t exposed log like Kyle’s house. Instead, the walls had been finished and painted a lovely, light cream. The floors were a dark cherry wood that matched the exposed rafters and cabinetry. The granite countertops were thick with a cream base speckled with splotches of red and black and - gold?

I ran my hand across the countertop, stunned that I hadn’t taken in its beauty before this moment. I mean, I’d worked on it for over a half hour and I hadn’t even noticed the shimmer?

Lifting my eyes, I felt my body moving from the kitchen, into the open concept living area. There was a large dark brown leather couch that just reminded me of a couch a man would own. There was nothing cut and clean about the couch - instead, it was built entirely for comfort. Beside the long couch, turned in to face the massive stone fireplace, was a matching chair. Over the fireplace, a large television had been mounted to the stone wall. There was an artful looking coffee table sitting directly in front of the couch, and I imagined Luke lifting his feet to rest against it’s polished wood as he settled in to watch TV.

The house was truly stunning. I’d walked past a set of stairs that had been positioned to stand between the kitchen and dining area. A small arch was between the two rooms, beneath the stairs. It was an artful way to split the dining area from the kitchen without making it so closed off that it felt too formal for use.

As I glanced once more into the large kitchen, I tried to recall the way his house had looked on the outside. I couldn’t. I hadn’t taken a moment to look at the details surrounding me. I had been too busy focusing on slowing the unsteady racing of my heart. I’d been too busy focusing on the dinner I would busy my hands to make.

“What do you think, pretty girl?”

I startled at the sound of Luke’s voice, jumping a little where I stood between the living area and the kitchen. When I looked up, I saw him descending the stairs with his eyes fastened raptly on me. He wore a pair of black swim shorts and a black muscle shirt. He looked - good.

The thought sent a vicious swirl of heat to pulse through my entity and I felt my cheeks turn pink. Desperate to cool them, I pulled in a deep breath.

“Um...” I stuttered, turning once again to the kitchen on now fumbling feet. “I was just looking - around.”

Luke’s hand caught my upper arm in his grasp as I turned to flee into the safe zone that was the kitchen. “Hey?” He tugged me gently to face him. When I didn’t look up voluntarily, he slipped his finger beneath my chin to force my eyes to meet his. My heart lurched and I swallowed a small gasp at the intensity in those dark orbs. “What are you running from, Ember?”

“What?” I whisper-gasped. Suddenly, the air that had, only a moment ago, felt stiflingly hot, was cold. Ice travelled through my veins, stabbing sharp needled thorns into my spine - but I couldn’t shiver. I couldn’t do anything but stand there, and wait for his reply.

“You’re always running. You run from me - all the time. Why?”

“I...”

“Talk to me, pretty girl.” He cooed.

I shook my head determinedly. “I’m not running. I - I don’t run.”

“Ember, you run. If you can see that, you’re blind.”

“Maybe you’re just chasing something that can never be.” My throat felt tight over the words - as though the muscles were trying to squeeze the words into dormant submission. “Maybe you should just stop chasing - and then I won’t feel like I have to run.”

I realized I had admitted, indirectly, that I was, in fact, running - but I didn’t care. This was the moment of importance. There were few of these moments - these life changing - future altering moments. But this was one. Right here, this second, Luke’s actions would determine the outcome of my future here at this Ranch, and with him. Although I didn’t realize the significance of this moment, at this second, it would be the turning point of the girl I had always been and the life I had always led. This moment was the moment that changed everything.

“Whatever it is you’re trying to outrun, Ember, I want you to understand that I’ll outrun you. I won’t let you scare me away - because I know there’s something your afraid of. I don’t know what that something is, but I’ll be damned if I let you face it alone. So until you can stop running and let me catch you, I’ll be right here beside you, running with you, until you stop. And when you’re too tired to run another step, I’ll be there to hold you up. When you’re too exhausted to keep fighting, I’ll fight for you.” His voice shook and the emotion that pulsed from within the man I had come to care so deeply for surrounded me - intoxicated me. “You can keep running for as long as you feel like you need to run, but understand that I’m here. I might be running, but I’m only trying to keep pace with you. When you’re ready to slow down, I want to be the man you slow down with. Until then...” he took in a rattled breath. “Until then, I’d really like to try whatever it is that’s making my house smell so damn good.”

***

The minutes that passed between Luke’s very heart-wooing words and the end of our dinner were fuzzy. Even now, as I stared at the man across the candlelit table, who’d somehow teased my heart into believing - or hoping - that I could be the kind of girl who had love - real love - I couldn’t actually allow myself to let down my guards. And I didn’t just have a guard. I had the Great Wall of China guarded by the ancient Samurai Warriors protected by the National Guard. My heart was practically untouchable - and yet...

Again, I blinked. For the life of me, my mind could not process the events that had transpired from when Luke had vowed to catch me when I could no longer run and this moment. Glancing down into my plate, I saw that I’d eaten all my food. But I couldn’t remember tasting any of it. All I could remember were Luke’s words. They kept replaying time and time again, in my mind. It was like a really catchy radio commercial - one of those jingles you just can’t forget or ignore.

“What’s on your mind, pretty girl?”

His voice sounded in the deep recesses of my brain, and it took my over-stimulated mind a moment to play catch-up. When I processed his words, I replied with a simple, “Nothing.”

Luke sat back in his chair. “The look on your face isn’t nothing.”

“Oh.” I had no idea what look I was wearing - but I believed him when he said it wasn’t nothing.

I knew it wasn’t
nothing
.

I knew I was full of shit - but I also knew I couldn’t even begin to explain the thoughts that were running through my mind. I just couldn’t. I was confused - and I felt as though Luke had found a way to push past the National Guard I’d placed around my heart. Somehow, he’d weakened my first line of defense. If I didn’t find a way to strengthen my resolve against him - I’d be ruined.

It didn’t take a genius to know that I would fall for Luke Donnelley beyond the realm of which I could heal myself if he decided to walk away. If he loved me now, only to decide that I was never worth it later, I would die. It was that knowledge that cemented my determination to keep my relationship with Luke platonic. Sometimes, the safer way was the better way.

Right now, the safe way was to keep Luke at arms length. If he were always an arms length away, he would never swing hard enough to knock me down.

When I looked back up at Luke, he was watching me with an intensity that made me feel, for a moment, naked. I wondered, when he looked at me like that, could he see everything I meant to keep secret?

Standing from the table, I picked up my plate before scooping Luke’s from in front of him. I didn’t bother explaining what I was doing as I moved to the sink.

At the feel of a large warm hand on the small of my back, with only the thin material of my maxi dress separating skin-to-skin contact, I jumped.

Luke chuckled. “Easy, pretty girl.”

“I’m not a horse.” I snapped at his cooing tone. I’d heard him talk like that to the spooked horses he was trying to calm and I didn’t take kindly to being treated like an agitated animal - even though I kind of felt like one.

“You’re not a horse, Ember.” He chuckled again. “But you spook like one.”

“Luke!”

He raised his hands as though in surrender. “If the shoe fits?”

“Luke!” I tried to fight the smile I felt tugging at the corners of my mouth.

“If it looks like a dog, smells like a dog, it’s probably a dog.”

“Luke!” This time, I couldn’t help my smile. Plus, detaining it felt wrong. “Will you stop with the animal references when you’re talking about me? I’m going to get a complex if you keep it up!”

Tossing his head back, he roared. When he was done, his eyes were glossy from the intensity of his laughter. Seeing that - was beautiful. “Shit, you crack me up, you know that?”

“I’m beginning to connect the dots.” I turned on the tap, but before I could grab a dish, Luke caught my hand in his. I gasped.

“You cooked.” He shook his head. “The cook doesn’t clean.”

“In what world?” I asked shakily, trying to regain the easy humor we’d had between us before he’d gone and grabbed my hand.

“In my world.” Luke replied seriously as he dropped my hand to my side. “Go get in your bathing suit. By the time you’re changed, I’ll be finished cleaning and we’ll have ice cream in the hot tub like I promised.”

I thought about arguing - but I really wanted that soak in the hot tub. So even though there were a thousand excuses floating through my mind with reasons for why he should just take me home, I said, “Okay.”

Luke grinned. “Okay.”

***

“This is amazing.” I leaned my head back against the lip of the tub to look up at the stars glimmering above us. The small silver speckles twinkling against the ebony were universal. When you looked up at the night sky halfway across the world, you saw the same moon and the same silver stars - this was a fact I had always known to be truer than true. But yet, whenever I visited this Ranch and looked up at the silver wishes embedded in the sea of ebony, I couldn’t help but think this was the most beautiful sky on earth. It was nonsensical, but to me it made sense.

The night May air wasn’t cold, but it definitely wasn’t warm. The contrast from the hot water and the cool air was lovely - positively exquisite. It was like a burst of flavor for the skin - a drug for the senses - and I was hooked.

“I can’t imagine living life any way, but in the country.” Luke sounded so relaxed, and when I glanced sideway at him, I was surprised to find him already gazing at me.

“It really is a nice, peaceful way of living.” I admitted. “But I’ve always lived in the city.”

Luke nodded. “Are you missing home at all?”

“No.” I shook my head. “I’m not missing it one bit.”

He chuckled before turning serious again. “Why did you decide to spend six months out here?”

I considered waving off his question, but then I remembered that I wanted, desperately, to remain being friends. Friends talked to their friends about their lives. Taking in a deep breath, I formed my reply. “I got stuck, I suppose.”

He straightened in the water, turning his body slightly toward me. “How do you mean?”

“I spent four years in University. Ever since I first visited this Ranch, I’ve wanted my life to revolve around horses.” I looked down into the bubbling water. “The only job I could think of doing that involved horses and would allow me to make a healthy enough living to never have to rely on a man was to become an Equine Veterinarian.”

When I paused, Luke waited silently for me to continue.

“I wanted to do that - with my life.” I looked up to meet his eyes. “I did, but I have another four years at a Equine College and then if I want to be completely certified, I’ll have one more year after that. That’s a minimum eight years of schooling, probably nine, because knowing me, I’ll take the extra year too.”

“Are you reconsidering what you wanted to do with your life?” He asked slowly, cautiously.

I nodded, feeling tears burn in the back of my eyes. “Not because I don’t want to work with horses, but because I don’t want to waste nine years of my life in school. I suppose I didn’t realize how short life is until I’d worked through four years of it without enjoying it at all.”

For a moment, he was silent. And then he spoke. “Do you like what you do here?”

I sighed. “I love what I do here, Luke. But this isn’t a practical job.”

“How isn’t it?”

I straightened, feeling suddenly irate. I felt hopeful and hopeless - and that was a debilitating kind of confusing. “Because it isn’t!”

“I’m telling you it is.” He replied sternly. “The job is yours for as long as you want it.” His eyes pinned onto mine. “I know you won’t make buckets of money, but you’ll make a decent living. You’ll be able to pay your school loans over time and you’ll be able to support yourself.”

I whispered. “Without a man?” I held his eyes. “Will I be able to support myself without a man?”

He tensed. “If that’s what you want from your life, then yeah, you’ll be able to support yourself without help from a man, or anyone else. But Ember, that isn’t living. Caging yourself away from possibility isn’t living.” He sat back once again and I watched his eyes lift to look up at the heavens. “I’ll do everything I can to help you find what you want from life and I won’t ask for anything in return. But I’m telling you that I’m hoping one day, you’ll trust me enough to let me in.”

The tears I felt burning the backs of my eyes surfaced to roll down my cheeks. In the silence, I cried. I didn’t make a sound, because I didn’t want him to see me this way - so weak. When he lifted his head and opened his eyes to find my glistening tears, his breath caught and he moved across the tub so quick to gather me into his arms, that I didn’t have a hope in Hell - or Heaven of stopping him.

BOOK: A Tender Touch: A Donnelley Brother's Novel (Logan Point Book 4)
6.28Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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