A Time to Move On (9 page)

A car behind her beeped their horn.
Laura looked up and saw the green light. She started to drive and after a few
breaths, the tears subsided. As Laura worked her way back to her apartment, she
started to think of what to do next. The whole real estate thing was fun, but maybe
it was time to find something she could just enjoy without having to think too
much. She could go back to being a waitress. Just like she had been doing when
she met Jon. When that spark changed their lives forever. Jeff’s brother owned
a fancy Italian eatery and would hire Laura in a minute. It was comforting to
know that she had that to fall back on whenever she needed.

When she got to her apartment, she went
right to her laptop and started to search for Fallen Tuesday videos online. She
couldn’t help herself. She couldn’t stop watching Mack playing drums. Seeing
him in sleeveless shirts, sweating, and playing was really hot.

A short while later, Laura’s cell
rang and it was Steph.

“Hey sister,” Laura said.

“Hey to you. You sound happy.”

“I do?”

“Yeah.”

“Do I never sound happy?”

“I don’t know. You just seem…
whatever. What are you up to?”

“Oh, you know, working hard over
here.”

Steph sighed. “Not very funny.”

“Sorry. I’ve had a weird day.”

“How so?”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told
you.”

In the background, Hannah let out a
cry. Hearing it tugged at Laura’s heart.

“She okay?” Laura asked.

“Teething,” Steph said. “It’s bad
right now. Poor thing had me up all night. Jeff had a big meeting at work so I
made him sleep in the basement.”

“Nice,” Laura said.

“Not really,” Steph said. “I had to
rock Hannah all night. But I did get to watch some old reruns and infomercials.”

“You didn’t spend any money, did
you?”

“Nope,” Steph laughed. “I was good.
I didn't want to disturb Hannah by reaching for my wallet.”

Laura smiled. She used to love
rocking Ella any chance she could. Jon would always tell Laura to stop spoiling
her. But now it's those times that Laura is grateful to have had.
My sweet
baby Ella…

“What are you…” Laura tried to find
a question. Anything. Something. “What are you making for dinner tonight?”

“Dinner? Really?”

“I don’t know.”

“That’s actually kind of why I’m
calling.”

“Okay…”

“Jeff sent me a text,” Steph said.
“He wants me to go out tonight and take the night off.”

“That’s sweet of him.”

“Yeah. He’s going to go in to work late
tomorrow. So I’m kind of free tonight.”

“And you called me?”

“I can’t call my friends. They’re
too
m
ommyish
for me.”

Steph laughed. Laura felt a sting
of pain in her chest, but she forced herself to laugh though. The last thing
she needed was Steph to feel like crap for saying something that should have
been nothing more than a passing joke.

“Okay then,” Laura said. “You have
the night free and you call me. I’m not that exciting. You know that, right?”

“More exciting than me,” Steph
said. “But there is something I want to do...”

“Which is?”

“I want to see a concert. Tonight.”

“A concert?”

“There’s a band playing I want to
go see. And as funny as it is, they’re about to go on tour with your savior.”

“My what?”

Steph snickered. “The band is
called Gone By Autumn. Ever hear of them?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Damn, I’ve done you wrong in
life,” Steph said. “How can you be my little sister and not be into music like
I am?”

Laura opened her mouth but held
back. She wanted to know why her sister was able to get married, have kids, and
have a perfect small town life while still having hobbies and interests like
music. And all the while Laura seemingly floated around directionless.

“I like music,” Laura said. “I’ll
go tonight.”

“Good. Because I think this is their
last show or one of the last before they go on tour with Fallen Tuesday, and
your savior, Mack.”

Mack.

Just hearing his name made Laura
smile and her cheeks turn the brightest shade of red.

“Oh, cool,” Laura said.

“So? Are we good for tonight?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll pick you up.”

“In a minivan?”

“What’s wrong with a minivan?”

“Going to a concert to party in a
minivan. You are such a
mom
.”

“Yeah… well…”

The line went instantly silent.

Laura knew what should have
happened but didn’t. Steph was going to make a comment about Laura being a mom.
According the last couple therapists, Laura was still a mom, and always would
be. But when she looked around her apartment that bared no reflection of a
child, it was hard to imagine that she was ever a mother.

I’m not a mother… not anymore…
baby Ella is gone.

“I need to get out tonight,” Steph
said.

“So do I,” Laura said.

“Just so you know, I have about a
million questions I’m holding back.”

“I know you do,” Laura said. “And I
love you for holding back. What time are you coming to get me?”

Steph laughed and told her to be
ready by seven.

The conversation ended and Laura was
surprised at how excited she was for a random night out with her sister. Maybe
quitting her job wasn't such a bad thing after all. She had already met a
famous rockstar, went on a lunch maybe-date with the same rockstar, and was now
getting a night out with her sister at a rock concert. Either the fates were
finally realizing that she was owed an apology, or she was heading for more
heartache... either way, she was tired of being afraid. It was time to be
brave. For Ella.

(9)

When Mack showed up to the studio,
the rest of the band was already there with Frank. Frank had papers all over a
table, along with a laptop and cell phone. He had ditched his tie, tossing it
over the back of a chair. All at once, five sets of eyes were on Mack.

After a few seconds, Mack showed
his hands and said, “I’m good. Move along. What are we talking about?”

“The tour,” Luke said. “Come look
at these dates, man. It’s crazy.”

“This might last for two years,”
Jake said.

“With breaks,” Frank said. “I
cannot stress that enough. You’ll have days and a week here and there. I
promise. The last thing we need is for anyone to get burned out.”

“Or for any of you lovebirds to get
lonely out there,” Mack said.

He growled when Laura's face popped
into his head.

Everyone stared at him.

“You sure you’re okay?” Gray asked.
He stood and stretched his back, then leaned against the mixing board.

“I’m good,” Mack said. “All good.
Can I see the dates?”

“Check it out,” Frank said.

He turned the laptop and Mack sat
where Gray had been. The laptop had a spreadsheet open with dates upon dates.
There was so much information, it was almost overwhelming. Cities. Venues.
Capacity. Projected sales date. Confirmation. Flights. Travel time.

Mack scanned the screen quick and
when he scrolled down, he began to comprehend just how big the tour would be.
It was so hard to imagine that Fallen Tuesday would be on stage that often.
They would be on their massive new tour bus. And they would have access to
private jets to accommodate their needs.

“This is…”

Mack lost his words. His eyes
stopped scanning when he looked at a date in the next year. It was the date of
Kelly’s death. Three-hundred-sixty-four days from now. He couldn't perform on
that day. How the hell would he be expected to focus and not be able to visit
the spot?

“What’s wrong?” Jake asked.

Mack slammed the laptop shut and
stood up. He looked around at his brothers and at Frank. They weren't supposed
to be worried about that date, but it bothered him that they didn't even think
about it. He clenched his fists and stormed out into the hallway.

“Hey, bro,” a voice said calmly.

It was Gray. He pulled the door
shut to the sound room behind him. Mack saw the consoling look in Gray's eyes; the
same look Gray probably gave his addict brother.

“Don’t give me any bullshit,” Mack
said.

“I’m not,” Gray said. “You slammed
the laptop and ran out. What’s up?”

“Nothing. Just… the tour…”

The door opened again. Frank came
out next, laptop tucked under his arm. He showed his cell and nodded. “I have
to take a call. The Gone By Autumn's manager called me. I’m going to take off.
I’ll catch up with you all later.”

“Yeah,” Mack said.

“You know, Mack…”

“Shove it, Frank,” Mack said.
“Just… just shove it.”

Frank nodded and left the studio.

“Harsh, man,” Jake said, stepping
into the hall.

Mack turned and walked into the
large room with all the instruments. It smelled clean and was really bright.
Like a slice of heaven.

“You have to talk to us,” Luke
said. “Whatever that was…”

“The fucking date, man,” Mack
snapped. He kept his back to the band. “The date. Did you see it?”

“Which one?” Trent asked.

Mack looked back. “
Her
date.
We’re going to be somewhere else next year when that date comes around.”

“Christ,” Gray whispered. He sat on
a piano bench.

“We’ll change the date,” Luke said.
“We'll make sure that’s one of our days off.”

“No,” Mack said. “Don't bother. I
don't need the pity.”

Jake approached Mack with caution.
“Look Mack, that date means a lot to you. And to all of us, Mack. We were
there… not the same as you… but we were there. Kelly was a part of our group…”

The room got silent.

“We have access to everything we
could ever imagine,” Trent said. “We have a private jet, dude.”

“No,” Mack said again. He shook his
head. “The date’s on the sheet. It’s booked. People are going to buy tickets
for the show. It’s what we’ve always wanted. It’s what
she
wanted for
me, and us. I can’t change that.”

“Okay,” Luke said. “Then we don't
change it.”

“That means I let her go then.”

“No, you don’t let her go,” Jake
said. He put a hand to Mack’s shoulder and pulled at him. “You never let her
go. You just move on. That’s what happens.”

“If I don’t let her go,” Mack said,
“how can there ever be someone else?”

It was the most honest question
Mack had asked in a long time.

Gray spun around and faced the
piano. He hit a few random notes. Mack came forward closer to Jake. Luke put a
hand on Mack's back.

“Is there someone else?” Luke
asked.

“No,” Mack said. A ping of regret
hit him. “Just some circumstances that have me thinking.”

“And have you playing new songs,
too, huh?” Luke asked.

Trent grabbed a guitar and started
to strum. Gray continued on the piano.

“Don’t worry about that song,” Mack
said.

“Oh, I am. I can’t stop thinking
about it. Because it’s good. Really good.”

“I second that,” Trent called out.

“Now you guys are pissing me off,”
Mack said. He waved his arms and chased Jake and Luke away. "Leave me
alone with the music stuff. I shouldn’t have even strummed a chord with you all
around.”

“You’re going to play that song for
us,” Gray said. “Trust me.”

“That’s what you think,” Mack said.

“Back to being serious for a
second,” Luke said. “Whatever you need to do, Mack, with that date, do it.
There’s no loss for the band.”

“Maybe it’s time to move on,” Mack
said.

“That’s your call,” Jake said.
“We’re just here to support you.”

“Like a good jockstrap,” Trent said
and laughed.

“What the hell is wrong with you?”
Gray asked.

“I don’t want to be anywhere near
Mack’s… stuff…,” Luke said.

Behind them, someone cleared their
throat.

“Sorry to bother you,” Frank said
from the doorway. “But the crisis Gone By Autumn's manager called about… their
drummer, Blake, isn’t feeling well."

“Can he tour?” Luke asked.

“Yeah,” Frank said. “But they have
a show tonight. Gone By Autumn needs a drummer.”

“Me?” Luke asked.

“Wasn’t thinking you,” Frank said
and smiled.

All eyes went to Mack.

“You want me to drum with Gone By
Autumn,” Mack said.

“It would help them,” Frank said.

“It would be kind of cool to
surprise everyone,” Luke said.

“How big is the show?” Mack asked.

“Not big at all. Gone By Autumn has
been playing all the small venues as much as they can. Their way of saying
thanks
to everyone for getting them to where they are right now.”

“That’s cool of them,” Jake said.
“They deserve the success that’s going to come.”

“What time is this show and where?”
Mack asked.

Frank put a hand up. “Does that
mean you’re in?”

“I guess that means I’m in,” Mack
said.

Gray hit a few loud notes on the
piano, resembling a horror movie.

Everyone laughed, even Mack.

He then looked over his shoulder at
his drum kit and shrugged. “I guess I might as well warm up a little before
tonight.”

That brought on whistles and cheers
from the band as they started jamming out a small set.

In the back of Mack’s mind though,
he couldn’t stop thinking about Laura. He still had the damn bag of plain chips
in a pouch on his motorcycle. It was probably for the better that he just focus
on music and prepare for the tour.

*

When Laura got into the passenger
seat of the minivan, she looked at Steph and contained her laugh. Steph looked
good but in a very desperate way to not look like a mother. It was cute because
Steph took pride in being
Mom,
but tonight she just wanted to be Steph.

“Are you wearing your wedding
band?” Laura asked.

“Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I?”

Laura laughed. “I’m just kidding.
This is the old Steph next me. I’m intimidated.”

“You should be. I might just get
wild and crazy.”

“Wild
and
crazy? Oh no… is
Mrs. Responsible going to have a drink with alcohol in it?”

Steph squinted her eyes and looked
at Laura.

“No,” she said. “I’m happy just
getting out of the house for the night. And to hear some music. Did you listen
to Gone By Autumn at all?”

“Why would I? We’re going to see
them tonight.”

“You’re supposed to know the music
before the show,” Steph said. “So you can really get into it. Feel the music.”

“Feel the music?” Laura asked,
rolling her eyes.

“Hey, don’t come down hard on my
love of music. Correct me if I’m wrong, but weren’t you the one
feeling the
music
on the back of a drummer's motorcycle?"

“That’s because I’m wild,” Laura
teased.

“No, you’re irresponsible.”

“Wow. Thanks, sister.”

“You know it’s true,” Steph said.
She turned down a street and there was a crowd of people gathered outside. “You
act before you think.”

“Is that bad?”

“I’d go insane. I write my grocery
list Sunday night and organize by aisle. That keeps me sane. But for you,
Laura, you just wake up everyday and live. And somehow life is ready for you.
You’re lucky.”

“Life,” Laura said. “Like I want to
talk about that right now.”

Steph parked the minivan and then
turned to face Laura. “There’s things I wish I could say to you…”

“Do you want to say them right
now?” Laura asked. “On your only night out with your sister?"

“If it would help you, yes.”

“Steph, I’m the woman that runs out
of gas and meets a rockstar. I’m the woman who quits her job because it just
doesn’t feel right. I don't know why it works, but it’s how I…” Laura felt the
tightness in her chest. “It’s how I get by.”

There was a moment of pause and
then Steph opened her door. “Let’s go have fun.”

Laura quickly learned that Steph
wasn't kidding about getting wild and crazy. She informed Laura
‘We need to
get to the gate!’
and there was no stopping Steph from pushing her way
through the crowd.

A black gate at the front of the
crowd kept everyone back from the stage. There was a opening between the gate
and stage, giving room for security to walk along and make sure nobody was
getting gin to trouble. Steph showed Laura how to grip the gate and hang on
tight to avoid being shoved around and away from the front. Laura had no idea
that there was a process to watching a concert.

They stood through two opening
bands which were pretty good. The first was more of a jam band, five guys and
two girls just playing music. There weren’t many vocals and the only time Laura
really heard their voices was when they spoke between songs. The second band
was loud and a little messy.

Seeing the excitement in Steph's
eyes reminded Laura of what she could have had. Although there was no chance
that Jon would have had a change of heart and decided to marry Laura, they
could have kept their arrangement civil for
baby Ella
, and Laura would
have had the
mom
life and the ability to go out once in a while, too.

Suddenly, the lights went out.

Laura gasped and everyone around
her cheered.

Red lights flooded the equipment
and some guys jogged out onto the stage.

“Hey, hey, give us some lights real
quick,” a voice echoed. “I have something to say.”

The lights came on and the crowd
cheered even more when they saw the band.

“Hey!” the lead singer yelled.

“HEY!”
the crowd yelled back
to him.

“I’m Ryan. I think you all know
that though.” Ryan looked around and smiled. “We’re Gone By Autumn... but we’re
missing our drummer.”

The crowd booed.

“I know, I know,” Ryan said. “Blake
is feeling a little under the weather tonight. He’s not here. He’s home in bed.
So I want you to do something… I want you all to yell so loud that Blake can
hear you. Ready?”

The crowd cheered.

“That’s not loud enough,” Ryan
said. He looked to his left. “Gabe, come here with me. Why aren’t they
listening?”

“I don’t know,” Gabe said. “Maybe
we shouldn’t play.”

The crowd was swelling all around
Laura. The hold they had on the crowd was intense.

“Let’s try one more time,” Ryan
said. “I want Blake to hear us!”

The crowd went wild. The screams pierced
Laura’s ears. She looked at Steph who was jumping up and down, yelling.

“Okay, okay,” Ryan said. “Good.
Keep that up. But tonight, we need a drummer. Gabe, do you know any drummers?”

“I know a good one,” Gabe said.
“But…”

“Wait a second,” another voice
said.

“What’s up, Asher?” Ryan asked.

Asher held a guitar and smiled. “I
think I saw someone backstage…”

“Him?” Ryan asked. “You think he
would come out?”

“He might,” Gabe said. “If these
people ask politely.”

“Or maybe just scream their damn
heads off!” Ryan yelled.

The crowd went wild again.

“Let me ask you this,” Ryan said.
“How many of you know we’re going out on tour?” The crowd responded. “How many
of you know a band called… Fallen Tuesday?”

Steph looked at Laura and winked.
Laura was embarrassed that she was starting to blush.

“Well, what if I told you…”

Before Ryan could finish his
sentence, a man walked on stage. The crowd exploded before Laura’s eyes could
make sense of what she was looking at.

Mack.

Now the crowd was louder than ever.
People pushed behind Laura. Her ribs were being slammed against the metal gate and
she reached for Steph.