A Year in the Life of a Complete and Total Genius (12 page)

Worked On: Stuff

Artie read the draft of my author piece and said it was good. he fixed alot of misstakes and showed me where I used anyway alot. he fixed it and now its better.

—Robbie

Robbie's essay on Chris Van Allsburg was interesting. I didn't know you could illustrate an essay. I wish more essays were illustrated. I didn't know anything about the guy at all, and now I learned something. That Chris guy is a pretty good illustrator, and I like that Robbie added some of his pictures into his essay. I never really read any of his stuff, but Robbie was showing me some really cool books that are cool even though they are picture books for kids. I don't know if they really are for kids.

Robbie's paragraph about magic in books was interesting too.

—Arthur

• • •

My Favorite Author

By Arthur Bean

Arthur Bean was born in a hospital in Winnipeg, Manitoba. His parents, Ernest and Margaret Bean, were ecstatic and proclaimed his talents early. Moving to Calgary when Arthur was only two years old, Arthur quickly became a fixture in the literary scene. He was reading chapter books before his seventh birthday and decided to be an author quickly thereafter. His first poem, called “Rain,” was published in the school newsletter in fifth grade, setting his career into motion.

After “Rain,” Arthur's stories took on a more serious tone. The playful nature of his first poem was subtly mocked in his first short story called “Lightning Storms over Disneyland.” He began developing his characters in more realistic ways in his story “Sockland,” a breakthrough story that got highly positive reviews from Mrs. Lewis, a highly regarded sixth-grade teacher.

Arthur's writing career was put on hiatus after Marg Bean died last year. She was his muse and greatest fan. But he has come back full force with a strong manuscript in the city-wide writing competition. He expects to win $200, his first prize in what promises to be a long writing career. He is also an amateur actor and investigative journalist.

Arthur's career means a lot to me because it is mine. I think he captures what I am feeling and thinking in what he writes, and he is very clever.

Mr. Bean,

This is an unacceptable interpretation of this assignment. This kind of snide mocking of the assignment is juvenile, unoriginal, and rude. I expect you to take home this letter to your parents and return it with a signature tomorrow.

Mrs. Carrell

• • •

March 24th

Dear RJ,

Mrs. Carrell is ruining my life. How am I supposed to write a story when she is clearly trying to make me lose the competition? She knows that the deadline is a week away, and she still gives us homework. Plus she sucks any fun out of writing too. She keeps yelling at me, and when she's not yelling, she has this look on her face like she is about to yell at me. She even yells at me when I haven't done anything! Like today, my pencil broke and I needed to sharpen it, and when I went to empty the pencil sharpener into the garbage, she said that I was disrupting the class! I was just emptying the pencil sharpener, and then she sent me into the hall! What did I ever do to her?

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

• • •

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])

Sent: March 24, 21:09

Dear Kennedy,

I'm really sorry I didn't get back to you earlier. I didn't get a chance to read your story. I was hoping to find time to read it, but I've been really busy. I'm sure that your story is awesome! I think you are probably my fiercest competition! And there's spell-check on the computer to catch any spelling mistakes, so I don't think you need to worry there.

Anyway, I should get back to writing my own story, but good luck with your final draft! I'm sure it's perfect!

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: March 24, 21:19

Thanks, Arthur!

Of course you didn't have a chance to read it! You're like the busiest person in the world! I should've thought about that more, especially knowing that you're in the play and writing for the newspaper AND writing a novel AND writing your own story for the competition! It's crazy! Can you imagine what it will be like when we're adults with JOBS LOL! Anyway, I'm so RELIEVED to get your email! And you said such nice things! You are TOO sweet!

Kennedy :)

• • •

March 27th

Dear RJ,

Stories are due soon and I've written nothing! Not even a word.

Why did I ever think I could be a writer? I have all these ideas in my head, but I don't know how to write them down. Or else I tell Nicole or Luke about them, and then when I try to write them down, all my ideas are gone. It's like someone took them away as soon as I said them out loud. I can't make my brain work. I can't even make my fingers type. Or if I get an idea that I don't talk about, I don't know where to start. Then I think about the ideas, and they're stupid. All of them are stupid. I'm stupid. I'm never going to be famous. Ever. Where can I get a story in three days?

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

• • •

Peer Tutoring Program—Progress Report

Session: March 29th

Worked On: Short Story

Robbie's story was good, except for the mistakes and stuff.

—Arthur

Artie helpd me with my camp storey, cuz I finnished it erly.

—Robbie

Gentlemen:

I understand that you are working together on a weekly basis, but in my books, this is an unacceptable synopsis of your work. I am certain this would not fly with Ms. Whitehead, and it certainly does not fly with me. In the future, I expect to see something concrete that you have worked on together.

Mrs. Carrell

• • •

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 02:04

Dear Robbie,

I know you don't owe me any favors at all, but I have a big one to ask of you. I need to use the short story that you showed me the other day. I think it's really good.

There's a long explanation, but I don't have anything to put in for the writing competition. It's hard to explain. I don't have a story, and I need one, and you have good ideas and the ghost story you wrote would be perfect. I'll give you anything you want. I can pay you for it. I just really need it, and I will be grateful if I could have it.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 08:22

I dont get it. why do u need my storey? why should i give it to u anyway? i dont want ur money. tell me why u need it, and ill decide from there.

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 08:43

Dear Robbie,

I need your story because I promised my dad I would win the competition because he's sad about my mom dying, and my grandma told me that she would die of a heart attack if I didn't win, and I bet my next-door neighbor Nicole $5 that I would win, and it's really important to them that I win because otherwise I will be a failure and let down my whole family because I'm supposed to be a famous author and I can't be a famous author without winning a competition.

Please don't tell anyone. I need to put a story in tomorrow and I need your help.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 12:08

That's alot of reasons artie. i also think, u owe me something big. heres the deal: u tell mr. Tan that u r dropping out of the play and i get to be romeo and i will give u my storey

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 12:22

Dear Robbie,

I don't think that's a very good trade. I have a lot of money. I can pay you as much as you want, but I really,
really
want to be in the play.

How about $50?

I can give you $50 for your story.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 15:44

i dont want your $. romeo for storey.

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 16:19

Dear Robbie,

What about $100? I would have to give it to you in two parts though, but I can get the money.

I don't think you want to be Romeo anyway. There are so many lines to memorize, and Mr. Tan is really strict in rehearsals.

Also, the reflections are a total pain to write, and the rehearsals can be really long and boring. I'm sure you have better stuff to do.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 19:05

Dear Robbie,

Do you want more money? I could give you the prize money! I kind of wanted it to get my dad something, but I can give you that if you want. Please don't make me give up the part!

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 20:00

Dear Robbie,

Fine. You can be Romeo. Can you send me your story tonight? I think that it's really good, but I'm going to make it even better, and I'm sure there are spelling mistakes I'll need to fix.

Arthur

From: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: March 30, 20:03

THANKS ARTIE! Heres my storey for you. im really glad to be playing romeo i think i will do a good job. anyway i am taller than kennedy so i think we will look good onstage next to each other more than you guys did. this makes my year. anyway i thought this year would suck!

Attachment included:
Ghost Love Storey

Arthur Bean

Ms. Whitehead

Class 7A

GHOST LOVE STORY

Before he died, Jack sat behind Kaylee in math class. Instead of learning about fractions, he studied her back. Her brown hair covered her neck. She rarely put her hair in a ponytail. Sometimes the tag of her shirt stuck out. She wore a medium.

Jack was average. He didn't do very well in math, and he hated English. He was pretty good at gym, and he liked art. He had a few friends, but he could have used more.

When school ended, summer vacation began. The only reason Jack cared about summer vacation was the fact that he wasn't going to see Kaylee for two months. Seeing Kaylee every day in math class made Jack so happy.

During summer vacation, Jack went to camp. Jack liked camp. It was at a lake and the kids were nice and they drew pictures of nature and did rubbings on rocks and acted out funny skits at night. They got to learn to sail and swim in the lake and play capture the flag. It was like gym and art class put together.

It was Saturday when it started raining at camp. One rainy day is okay because the camp had some movies to watch in the big lodge. But then it rained on Sunday. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. All rain. By Friday everyone was so sick of the lodge that when Jack suggested a rainy swim in the lake, lots of kids agreed. The counselors were tired of coming up with indoor activities, so they agreed too. They played Rock Paper Scissors to see who had to stand watch out in the rain. Brooke lost.

The lake seemed really warm compared to the cold rain. Jack preferred to stay under the water for as long as he could. When he couldn't hold his breath any longer, he would burst through the surface for a big gasp of air. Jack dove under over and over. He would grab the younger kids by their ankles and listen for them to shriek and kick him away. He did this for hours until he was the only kid left swimming. Brooke was cold and wet and grumpy.

“Jack! Are you going to be in there all day?” she called out.

Jack nodded.

“You okay if I go inside?” she asked.

Jack nodded again. Then he dove under the water into the warmth of the reeds. When he surfaced, he was alone. He smiled and swam out a little farther, then ducked under the water.

He never came back up.

It was a few hours before anyone noticed that Jack hadn't come in from the lake. They looked for him, but Jack knew they wouldn't find him. No one was going to look for him tangled in the reeds at the bottom of the lake. He was just a ghost floating above them now. The counselors called the police. They brought their search-and-rescue boat. Jack was pleased that he was so important, and he hovered over the bow of the boat when they went out into the middle of the lake.

The police were grumpy in the rain. They called him a “stupid kid” for swimming out so far. He tried to punch them in the face, but his fist never hit anything. They found his body in the reeds. The police pretended to be sad when they pulled up to the dock.

When school started again, nobody seemed to miss Jack. This made him sad. He wanted people to wear black arm bands and maybe put a large photo of him in the trophy case, like schools in movies do for students who have died. But no one did anything. He thought maybe his favorite teacher would leave his desk in homeroom empty as a tribute. Instead, everyone moved up a desk to replace him. He thought that maybe there would be a moment of silence for him at the beginning of art class, but his teacher just started teaching pastel techniques.

The worst was Kaylee. Kaylee didn't notice at all. She didn't cry or even ask anyone about him. It was like he had never been alive in the first place. It sucked.

Jack sat on the desk behind hers and stared at her back. She still wore a medium. Her hair was longer. She stared at Olivier, the French exchange student, and purred “
Bonjour
” at him when he looked at her. Jack thought that was really annoying. But other than that, she was still nice.

Still, she didn't notice he was gone.

So Jack decided to make her notice. He followed her home and watched TV sitting next to her on the couch. He curled up beside her on her bed when she was reading. He went to every volleyball game, every play rehearsal, every swimming lesson.

Then Kaylee started feeling cold at night. She smiled less. She seemed…sad, somehow. She had never seemed sad before.

Jack worried about her.
Maybe she's sad about me
, he thought to himself.
Maybe she's realizing that I'm gone.

Jack was getting stronger as a ghost. He found that he could move the curtains, just a whisper. He would rush back and forth through the curtains, and they would flicker. Each time he would blow the curtains in Kaylee's living room, she would look up. He smiled to himself. She was starting to notice him. So he made a plan to make her notice more.

One night, Kaylee's parents went out to bowling, leaving her alone. The rain started around six, and by seven there was a huge lightning storm. The storm fueled Jack's ghost powers, making him super-strong.

Jack started off small. He swooshed the curtains around. He rattled the glasses. Kaylee shivered when he moved around her. He slammed the bathroom door. He jiggled the doorknobs. He pushed her pens so they would roll off the table.

“Ghost?” she called out to Jack. “I know you're here!” she cried. But the only answer was the sound of her pencil clattering to the floor. “Go away!” she yelled into the air.

“It's so cold,” she whispered to herself as Jack moved back and forth, causing her teeth to chatter. Finally she stood up and went upstairs to get a sweater. She grabbed a hoodie off her floor and struggled to pull it on.

Jack took hold of one of the sleeves and pulled as hard as he could. The sleeve twisted around to the back. Kaylee had her head in the sweater and was pulling on the sleeve, trying to unwind it from the back. She walked toward the stairs. Just then there was an earth-shattering crash of lightning.

Kaylee was caught off guard, and she tripped. Jack watched helplessly as she tumbled headfirst down the stairs. She lay still at the bottom. Her hoodie still covered her face. Her neck was at a funny angle.

Jack yelled, but there was no sound. He cried, but no one heard him. Finally, he curled up next to Kaylee and cried. He tried to hold her hand. “I love you,” he wept. “I really, really love you.”

Then he felt something cold and clammy tighten around his fingers.

Kaylee's ghost blinked at him. Then she smiled. “Are you a ghost?” she said. Jack nodded.

She sat up and looked down at herself.

“Am I a ghost?”

Jack nodded.

“Will you show me around, Ghost?” She smiled at him and flipped her ghost hair.

Jack nodded.

“You're cute, Ghost. What's your name?” she said.

“Jack,” Jack whispered.

“Jack,” she said. “Did I know you before?”

Jack nodded. “I've loved you forever.”

Kaylee smiled shyly. “I guess I better catch up then.” She kissed his cheek. “Now, can you show me how you do that curtain thing?”

And they died happily ever after.

The End

Hiya, Arthur!

Your story looks great. I'll add it the to pile of finalists. I'm going to be working on the science fair (and, hey! I didn't get your proposal…) and track-and-field tryouts are this week, so I might not get to read everything before printing—there are a few “hurdles” for this new track coach!

The newspaper will be out just before spring break, and voting will start after we get back, so watch for the ballot. I'm sure you will want to cast a vote for yourself; you can get a leg up on the competition!

Speaking of spring break, the Spring Fling Dance is coming up. It's a Sadie Hawkins theme, which means that the girls ask the boys! Very old-fashioned thinking, in my opinion, but I'm not leading the social committee, am I?

Would you be able to cover the dance for the newspaper?

Let me know!

Cheers,

Mr. E.

Dear Mr. Everett,

I was thinking that I could write my own article for the next edition. I was thinking it could be like “An Insider's View on the Competition.” It would be about winning the writing competition and stuff. I'm pretty sure that I will win, and I'm sure that other students would be interested in what that is like.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

Hiya, A,

I'm glad you're so confident, but let's not count our chickens before they hatch! I think I hear some clucking coming from you! Plus, we really need a piece on the dance after spring break. Are you ready to bust a move?

Cheers,

Mr. E.

• • •

Romeo and Juliet
—
a Star's Reflection

By Romeo

Act 2, Scene 4

In this scene I am planning something with the enemy. Well, not really the enemy anymore, but Juliet's nurse. We have to be devious to get away with what I am planning, so we make secret plans that no one knows about. I feel good and bad about it. I am glad that I am getting what I want (marrying and kissing Juliet), but I have to give up something as well (my family). I feel very torn about it. It is like the time when I was seven and my cousin Luke wanted to switch Christmas presents with me. I really, really liked my present, but I really, really wanted his present too. But I couldn't have both, so I chose his present over mine. I still think about that Christmas. I don't know if I should have switched. I miss my real present, even though it was only mine for a day or two.

Arthur, you've tapped into a strong memory to work from, and I think this will translate nicely into your acting. This week we're heading into some of the scenes with some heavy feelings. Keep digging into your memories and building your character!

Mr. Tan

• • •

From: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: April 4, 15:54

i saw u in the drama room today practissing R&J. u r NOT in the play anymore anyway.

u better tell mr Tan tomorrow or i will tell some one about “ur” storey

robbie

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: April 4, 20:14

Dear Robbie,

You hadn't brought up the play in a few days, so I thought maybe you had decided that you didn't want to be in it. I figured that you would have thought about that over the weekend and realized how much work it is.

But I will tell Mr. Tan this week.

You do know there are rehearsals through spring break, right? If you are going away for the week, you can't be in the play.

Are you going to visit your mom? I bet she misses you.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

From: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: April 4, 21:13

dont make me come after you

r

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Robbie Zack ([email protected])

Sent: April 4, 20:14

Dear Robbie,

No need for you to join me. I will talk to Mr. Tan tomorrow, I guess.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

• • •

Dear Mr. Tan,

I've realized that I can't participate in the play anymore. My duties as a student are more important, and I need to focus on my writing.

Acting is really a secondary skill for me, and since I want to be a writer and not an actor, I am hereby dropping out of the school play. Robbie Zack, my understudy, has agreed to take my part as Romeo very seriously.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

Dear Arthur,

PLEASE come and see me anytime today. I would like to discuss your decision with you. This is not something I take lightly.

Mr. Tan

• • •

From: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])

To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

Sent: April 5, 19:39

ARTHUR!! What is up?!?!?! Mr. Tan told us today in rehearsal that you QUIT the play?!?! I thought you LOVED being in the play!! We missed you today! I mean, Robbie is really nice but we have to start rehearsing scenes ALL OVER AGAIN! What happened? Why aren't you in the play anymore? I totally don't understand!

Kennedy :(

• • •

April 5th

Dear RJ,

I hate myself! I can't believe I am stupid enough to give up my ONE chance to make Kennedy fall in love with me just so that I can be famous! Does every famous person have to make difficult decisions like this? What if she falls in love with Robbie and then they get married? I'll be famous and alone, and people will always look at me with pity in their eyes. It will be worse than when Mom died because they will look at me like that FOREVER. I'll go on talk shows to promote my book and I'll have to joke about “the one that got away”…but it won't be a joke!

Now it's spring break and we're not even going to visit Luke's family. I'll just be at home or sitting at Nicole's house, thinking about how I will be alone forever.

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

• • •

From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])

To: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])

Sent: April 5, 23:03

Dear Kennedy,

I'm sorry to quit the play like that. I did what I had to do for my art. You know, my novel and such. I really didn't want to, but I had to do it.

It's too bad you're away for spring break. At least, I think you are. I accidentally overheard you telling Catie you were going away. I hope you have fun!

Yours truly,

Arthur Bean

• • •

April 12th

Dear RJ,

This is officially the worst spring break ever. There's nowhere to go and nothing to do. My dad only took a couple of days off, but even then, we just went to my grandparents' house. It snowed the whole time, and my grandma just wanted to go to the drugstore. I wish she would make a list of stuff she needed so that we didn't have to go every day.