Aaron: Book Three (Scars 3) (8 page)

I cleaned up and
she still sat at the table, drinking until the bottle was gone. I was at the
sink when she came up behind me, wrapping her arms around my waist and leaning
her head against my back where my scars were hidden by my t-shirt.

I stopped
breathing for a second and stayed very still.

“Fuck me,” she
murmured, sounding tired. Slowly, her arms unwrapped from around me and went to
the bottom of my t-shirt. She began pulling it up, over my stomach and higher.
I raised my arms and let her pull it over my head.  A coolness hit me and my
nipples hardened. Her hands were at my belt, loosening it and pulling down my
jeans, and then my underwear. Kneeling down below, she let free each of my
ankles from being trapped in the denim and cotton, and like a puppet, I let
her. When she had finally achieved her task, she threw them away from us to the
far side of the kitchen and I stood in front of her, completely nude.

Slowly, she rose
to her feet, pulling on my hips to force me to face her. My penis rose up hard
between us but she didn’t touch it. Her eyes were on my face. “Fuck me,” she
repeated, her words so succinct for how drunk she was.

I smiled
slightly. “You’re not naked yet.” I reached out and brushed a lock of hair from
her shoulder gently, before I reached for the bottom of her dress. She pushed
my hand away.

“No, I want to
be dressed. I want you naked and I want me dressed.” Her own hands went beneath
the skirt of her dress and pulled down her panties to her knees. “Fuck me now,
fuck me like this,” she ordered, her eyes were hard and her jaw jutted out with
determination. I waited a few beats before picking her up and placing her on
the stone countertop, pushing the skirt up to the tops of her thighs before
touching her between her legs. She wasn’t that wet yet and I began to massage
her clit, tracing circles the way that I knew would drive her wild, but she
pushed my hand away angrily.

“No, not that.
Just
fuck
me.” Her eyes were blazing now with anger.

“You’re not wet
enough yet.”

“So fucking
what? Why would you care about that?” Her hand went to my throat, circling it
and pressing hard. “Don’t pretend to be a nice guy, Aaron. Don’t pretend to
care. Don’t pretend with me. I
know
what you are. You’re fucking evil
dressed up in a pretty package, except for the ugly scars on your back. They
let everyone know what you are so you can’t hide.” Her teeth were bared and her
words tight. She let go of my throat and slammed her palm into my cheek. I
didn’t flinch or react. “Just fuck me!”

The anger rose
slowly, mingled with lust as my cheek stung. I waited just a moment, looking
into her eyes and seeing nothing akin to regret there, and that was when I sprang
into action.

I shoved into
her, not caring about her delicate flesh ripping or bruising. I pushed into her
as far as I could go and she gave a grunt‒there was still no regret
there. In fact, her legs came around me to keep me in her and I fucked her
hard, almost forgetting that there was a person there, and not just that pussy
that was warm and more inviting than the shell of the person who owned it.

Her nails curved
into my back, cutting and releasing her rage. She bit my shoulder and with the
pain that she caused, I just fucked her even harder, closer and closer to
cumming‒

“No!” Her hands
pushed at my chest and for a second I thought about not letting her win, about
staying in the warmth, but I pulled instead, taking a step back, frustrated as
fuck. She slid down from the counter top, grabbing my hand as she fell to her
knees. “Down. Down on the floor.” She yanked me down with her. “I want to fuck
on the floor,” she said in a near frenzy. “I’m on top.” She pushed and pushed,
and finally I allowed her to get me down on the hard floor. Instantly, she was
on top of me, putting me back inside of her where I belonged. Her hand
encircled my throat once more as she began to move. I lifted my hands to touch
her, then thought better of it and lay them at my side.

She had the body
of a goddess, everything about her was beautiful from the long pale hair, to
the curve of her hips and the fullness of her breasts. But the exception was
her eyes‒even with her rage dominating her, they were cold and reminded
me of my dream. I closed my eyes for a second and she squeezed my throat
harder. “Look at me,” she rasped as she moved up and down on my cock. “Look at
me while I fuck you.” Her voice was deep and my eyes flicked open as she
increased her speed. She collapsed down to rest her head against my chest as
she ground against me, harder and harder. I felt her saliva on my chest and
heard her moan. Even with her restricting hand on my throat, I felt close to
cumming again, with everything in me rising higher and higher, even as I lay
trapped beneath her, my cock belonging to her…

She gave a throaty,
deep moan…the terrible sound from my nightmares…as she came, and that forced me
to cum at the same time. Remembering the terror from the dream mixed with the
exquisite heat that she surrounded me with, I came hard, exploding into her as
she shook against me.

When we had both
finished, she still lay with her head on my chest, and I felt a wetness. That
was when I realized that she was crying.

I didn’t move.
Her hand moved from my throat to tuck into her chest as she quietly began to
shake with silent tears that dripped onto me. I stayed as still as stone. My
hands twitched to touch her, but I let them be.

I didn’t know
how long we stayed there. It could have been five minutes, it could have been
twenty. Eventually, she sat up, wiping at her face before crawling along the
floor to where her discarded panties lay. Her hands curled into them before she
struggled to put them on, pulling down the skirt of her dress to be respectable
once more.

“I’m going to
take a bath,” she muttered, not even to me really. It was as if she’d forgotten
that I was there. I lay still as she walked off, not moving until I heard the
door close and the sound of water running.

I didn’t bother
to dress. Naked, I walked to the liquor cabinet and poured myself a drink.
Closing my eyes, I downed it quickly. Maybe it was a mistake telling her about
her mother but it was something that was always there, lingering. She was too
emotional. She felt too much, and the essence of her mother was always hovering
over her, unseen but thick and suffocating. Love and hate were always closely
entwined, or so I’d been told. My feelings for my father had always been of
hate and resentment and now that he was dead, I only had a sense of cold
whenever he crossed my mind on those rare occasions. It was important not to
give pathetic assholes too much thought. If he was still alive now, I wouldn’t
have even bothered killing him. He wasn’t worth my time, or a bullet, or the
time it took to clean blood from a knife…

And my mother…I
wouldn’t see her either. I’d have her put somewhere, like a nice apartment overlooking
the sea, a different sea to this one though, where she was safe but where I
didn’t have to see her.

I placed the
glass down gently on the wood of the cabinet and caught sight of my reflection
in the glass panelling‒cold eyes, black hair, grim mouth. For a moment I
let my lips curve up into a smile and show white teeth. The change was
dramatic. This smiling man was a guy that people wanted to know, wanted to fuck
and wanted to please.

I let my mouth
drop.

That guy wasn’t
me.

After I cleaned
up downstairs, I started up the stairs. She was still in the bath and hadn’t
bothered to put her hair up. It floated in strands around her as she stared at
the wall in front of her. Kneeling beside her, I took the bar of soap and began
to drag it over her back to leave a trail of suds. As I moved around the front
to wash her chest, her hand reached out and grabbed mine with an iron grip,
curling her nails into my arm. I waited for her to say something but when she
didn’t, I leaned in close to her ear.

“Are you really
being this pathetic and weak about your mother?”

She twisted her
head to face me with anger in her eyes. “I’m not weak, Aaron. You should know
that by now.” Her words were tight with menace.

I just grinned
at her. “I know. Now stop acting like it.” I kissed her unmoving mouth before
pulling away from her to fetch the towel from the rail. I held it up as she
stepped out of the bath and wrapped it around her dripping figure. As she took
hold of the top of the towel to keep it in place, she looked up at me.

“You can’t
understand. Do you know how hard it is to be with someone who doesn’t…care
about anything? Who doesn’t feel anything?”

She kept her
eyes on me, and I could have told her something to comfort her, but I didn’t
see the point.

“You’re wrong,
Rachel. I feel plenty. However, I don’t believe in wasting my time on stupid
shit. It only holds you back.” I sounded harsh but she didn’t flinch.

“What’s the
point?” she asked in a voice tinged with sadness.

“What do you
mean?” From in the bedroom, I heard my phone sound but I ignored it.

“You have money,
a beautiful house, a great car…but you take joy in nothing. What’s the point of
it then?”

I stared at her
for a moment, then I flashed her the grin‒the smile that belonged to the
guy everyone likes. “You’re wrong. Again. I take joy in my car. It’s great to
drive.”

She scowled and
pushed past me into the bedroom.

Laughing, I
followed her in, watching her as she grabbed her robe while I stretched out on
the bed and reached for the phone from the nightstand.

I stopped
laughing. The text was from Luca. I was being summoned, like a dog.

“I’ve gotta go.”
I climbed off of the bed and slipped the phone into my pocket. “Don’t wait up.”
I slapped her on the ass as I walked past her toward the door.

“Aaron?”

I paused in the
doorway.

“You’re empty.
Your eyes are empty. Your heart is empty.” There was bitterness in her tone;
even resentment, maybe.

I waited a beat
before slowly turning to face her. “It doesn’t matter to me, not one single
bit. Think what you like.”

Luca wanted me at his house. It was his
wife who let me in. Normally, I just saw her at parties where she was vivacious
and full of life, but now, with just the two of us, she was silent with just
the merest hint of smile. Who could blame her? After all, who would want a
killer at their door while their children slept on the floor above? Maybe she
was like me, acting.

Either way, she
was the one that married Luca, had bred with Luca, and she was the one who had
to deal with the consequences of that.

“He’s in his
study,” she said as she closed the door behind me. “You know where it is.” And
then she walked away, her heels echoing around the massive entrance way. The
space had a cathedral style ceiling and it was empty of everything else as not
to interfere with the majesty of the stained glass panels above.

Empty.

I cast my eyes
around me. Beautiful but empty. Rachel would probably make something of that in
her dramatic way. How could she make such judgements when she was as fucked up
as anyone? Besides, I’d only asked her a simple question and she’d reacted
crazily. I lifted my hand to my throat and wondered if bruises would appear in
the morning.

Sighing, I went
to see Luca. Predictably, he sat behind his desk with a drink in hand.

“I hope I didn’t
pull you away from anything important.”

I settled myself
by the fire. “Not at all.”

“I’ve got a job
that needs doing and I want to keep it between you and me.”

“I’m always
discrete.”

He smiled but
his eyes were still dead. “I know. I need you to find someone for me.” He
opened his desk drawer and plucked an item from it, staring at it for a moment
before holding it up to show me.

Shit.

“Do you know
this woman?” She was younger but it was definitely her.

“No. Should I?”
A thrill went through me and my heart began to beat faster as adrenalin pulsed
in me. The risk of lying to this man…that was an adrenalin sport in itself and
for a moment I felt like laughing as my endorphins kicked in. The rush was
fucking awesome.

My face was
still though and revealed nothing. He was staring at me though; inspecting me
in that way of his.

“She’s an old
acquaintance of mine and I need her found.” He passed an envelope across to me.
“Here are her details. I don’t want you to use any of your people. You need to
do the work alone.”

I opened the
envelope with steady hands and pulled out the slip of paper. “She’s been off
the radar for eighteen years? Why is it so important to find her now?”

He tilted his
head to study me. “You don’t normally need to ask questions, Aaron. Are you
losing your touch?”

I put the paper
back in the envelope. “No.”

He leaned back
in his chair. “Good. I hate to be disappointed.”

“Are we done here?”

He gave a nod
and I got to my feet, my leg aching.

“Got your piece
of ass waiting for you at home?”

I let my lips
slip into a tight smile. “Yeah. I guess she’ll be there.” I shrugged.

“She’s been with
you for a while now.”

“Yeah, well,
she’s convenient. I can’t stand clingy women.”

He tapped his
fingers on the desk. “So she’s just a ‘convenience’?”

“Yup.” I turned
to go.

“Then you won’t
mind sharing her.” I heard him say from behind.

I felt something
like ice shoot up my spine and I froze. Slowly, I turned to face him. “When I’m
done with her, anyone can have her, but I’m not done just yet.”

He was smiling.
I wasn’t fooling him.

“Well, you don’t
want to keep her waiting now, do you?” His eyes glittered in the firelight.

“Goodnight,
Luca.” I gave him a smooth smile in return and walked out, disguising my limp
the best that I could. I calmly left the house, closing the front door gently
behind me. One of his men stood guard and gave me a nod of recognition, I
nodded back before getting into my car and driving off.

All my motions
were fluid and graceful. There was no jerking on the brakes or taking of
corners too sharply. I drove along following the ocean until I came to a scenic
lookout and then I pulled the car to a stop.

I sat there for
a moment, as still as stone, then I let it loose.

“
Fuck!”
I
slammed my hands against the steering wheel. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” I ran my hand
through my hair as I struggled to get myself under control.

He knew. He
fucking knew what Antony had asked me to do, otherwise it would be one major
fucking coincidence. I was being tested. My loyalty was on the table and I’d
just defied him over Rachel.

I sucked in deep
breaths. Everything felt like it was unwinding at speed and every part of me
was unraveling. When my Dad locked me in the basement, for some reason there
was a spool of cotton down there and as I sat in the dark, I would wind it
around my finger as tight as anything until the pain made me forget everything
else. Once that finger became numb, I would release it and let the blood flow
again, and then I would begin the process once more, over and over, until there
was release.

There was safety
in pulling that cotton tight. I was in control.

I wasn’t about
to lose that.

I checked my
appearance in the rear view mirror. I looked perfect‒cold and under
control.

Letting out a
breath, I started the car and drove off. But I kept looking in that mirror. It
wouldn’t be long before they came and I needed to deal with that.

I couldn’t
sleep. She slept beside me, so silent that for an instant I thought that she
was dead, but then her eyes flickered open and she caught my gaze before her
eye lids closed again, like I was something inconsequential and not worth
looking at. She looked angelic, her pale hair arranged over her pillow, her skin
perfect, her lips with just a hint of red on them.

I wanted to wake
her up. I wanted to see her eyes widen in alarm that it was me that she awoke
to and not whoever she dreamed about. I reached a hand out to touch her but at
the last moment drew it back almost in fear that touching her would burn me
like it did in my own dreams.

Instead, I lay
back down, facing her. Her eyes opened again, but there was no alarm. “What is
it?”

“Nothing. Go
back to sleep.”

She let out a
puff of breath and then turned so that her back was to me. It wasn’t long
before her breathing became rhythmic again as she slept in an untroubled
slumber. I turned onto my back and stared at the ceiling.

It was time. I’d
been stupid to think that we could keep living like this. This was a life for
other people. This house and this money…there should be other people living
here, not two seriously fucked up individuals.

I looked at her
once more.

Nobody could say
that I didn’t try.