After Forever Ends (57 page)

“Mum?” Oliver said gently, taking a step toward her, “Don’t cry! It’ll be fine! Oh, come here! I’ve got arms for both of you!”

She stood and fell against her son. Oliver was holding us both under each arm whispering consolation when Alexander came sprinting down the hall. He skidded to a stop, “Silvia! You’re here! Thank God! Can you please come? She’s completely mental!”

I nodded. Alexander took my hand. I waddled as fast as I could along behind him, being eight months along myself. I looked over my shoulder and watched Oliver draw his mother in with both arms. “Be strong for her, Love!” He called after me. “She’ll get through it!”

“They gave her something to calm her down, but she’s asking for you. She’s lost it completely!” Alexander was stressed. I could see the vein pulsing in the side of his neck as it only did when he was very upset, “I’ve never seen anyone like this!”

Lucy was lying in her bed moaning when I entered the room. When she saw me, her eyes widened. She looked crazed, not at all like sweet little Lucy, “Oh, Silvia!” She held her hand out for me, “I’m dying, Silvia! I’m dying just like Mummy…”

“Lucy!” I went to her side, “You are not dying!” She went into a contraction and screamed bloody murder. “Lucy!” I got right in her face, “Look at me! I said look at me!” I knew I only had seconds before she contracted again.

My sister looked into my eyes, but she was completely dazed, “I killed her, Sil! She died having me!” She screamed again, “Make it stop! Make it stop!”

“Lucia Dianna Cotton!” I grabbed her chin and forced her to look into my face, “Mummy didn’t die having babies! Mummy died because she fell! She fell, Lucy! She fell off of a ladder hanging curtains in a shop at her job!” Lucy contracted again. She screamed wildly, “Lucy! Come back to me!” I put my hand on her sweaty cheek and made her look into my eyes again, “She hit her head, Sweetheart! She died from too much blood inside her head, not because she was having babies!”

“I always thought…I thought I killed her…” She screamed again, pounding her head back against her pillow. “Please! Please! Stop!”

“Oh, God, Lucy! No! It was an accident! A stupid, silly accident!”

“I didn’t do it? She didn’t die because of me?”

She tilted her head back and screamed again, but not with as much force. I could see the strength draining out of her.

“No, Lucy, you were four months old when mummy died! It was completely cruel of Dad to never have told you! To let you think that all your life! Damn him!” I truly hated him at that moment. I watched my baby sister contract again, watched her suffer, and I wished our father was there so he could see how he’d made it worse for her. “Come on now,” I knew I had to keep her going, “Remember these little babies inside you! You want them so badly! You fought to keep them inside you! Remember that?”

She looked at me. Her face was odd. She looked like somebody had drained all the blood from her veins, like her skin was some sort of living plastic. I knew she wasn’t really with me, only just drifting in and out. I remembered lying on the lawn while my baby died inside me and hearing the Lord and the Lady telling each other that I looked in a bad way. I thought that I must have looked something like Lucy did at that very second. “Lucy, stay with me now! You have to be strong for those babies! You have to fight just as hard now to get them out as you did to keep them in!”

“She needs to start pushing,” The nurse told me, “She needs to push with every contraction.”

“Be strong…” She muttered, “For my babies…where is Alex?”

“I’m right here, Honey,” He went around to her other side.

“Alex! I need you! I’m so scared!”

“I’m right here.”

“Hold my hand!”

“I will. I won’t let go of you, I promise. Come on now, Lucy, our children need you.”

“Ours. Yours and mine.” Her eyes were fogged. “Two girls.”

“Yes, Lucy, we’re having twins. Come on now, help them be born.”

“On the next contraction, push,” I said, “Just push as hard as you can like you’re on the toilet. Make them come out.”

The medication was taking her over. She wasn’t screaming anymore, but she couldn’t push either. “I’m so tired…” She did her best, but she was exhausted. She pushed with all her might for as long as she could, but fifteen minutes later it was not enough.

The doctor finally told her to stop, “I’m going to help you now, Lucy. I’m going to help bring the first baby out.”

“Oh, God!” She sobbed, “Oh, God, thank you!”

I had never seen forceps before. They looked like giant salad tongs, like a utensil you’d uncover in the cupboard of a monster. “You’re going to put those where?” I thought in horror, but I said nothing. I was sure that I would faint.

I looked at Alexander. He went white and swallowed, but he turned to his wife. “It’s OK, Lucy. Lie back.” He smoothed her hair away from her face and spoke gently to her while the doctor took those enormous pincers and inserted them inside her body.

She wailed in hurt.

I closed my eyes. I was dizzy. When I opened them a moment later, the doctor was drawing out a tiny, bloody…and completely silent baby.

I held my breath.

The doctor turned his back and did something I could not see. “Come on!” He muttered and continued to move his arms. “Come on now!” He lifted the baby and did something else, “Come on, Baby! Let us hear your voice! Come on, Darling, cry for us!”

I watched a tear roll down Alexander’s cheek.

“Come on, Baby!” The doctor said once more.

I closed my eyes again.

“Please,” I begged silently, “Please, if there is a God out there, please, please, please…make this baby all right! Please…please…please…not like Cara…please, don‘t do that to Alex and Lucy…please, not like Cara…please…”

It seemed like forever for it to happen, but the room was suddenly filled with the magical sound of a screaming child. It was faint at first, but the doctor did another something and the sound became louder and louder until it was obvious we had a very upset baby in the room.

“Great work!” I gasped.

I heard Alex release his breath. I glanced at him as he hurriedly wiped more tears from his cheek.

Lucy lie back against the pillows with her eyes closed. “Is she all right?” She asked softly, “Is my baby all right?”

“3/5,” The nurse called.

“We’re looking her over,” The doctor said gently, “Now we’ve got another to deliver, Lucy. How are you?”

My sister opened her eyes and blinked a few times, “I think I’m all right. I’m all right as long as she’s all right.”

The nurse called out, “Here she comes now! She’s a fighter! 8/9!”

The doctor smiled, “Yes, she got off to a slow start, but she’s fine. Can you push?”

“You’ve got the first one!” Alexander kissed the side of her head. “Just the one to go now! You can do it!”

Lucy seemed to have renewed strength. She gritted her teeth and pushed until she had nothing left to push with and with one final grunt, out came the second baby, who fell into the doctor’s hands screaming like she hated the whole world.

I had to sit down and collect myself.

I watched Alexander take my sister into his arms, “They’re here!” He told her, “You did it! Two girls, Honey! Two little girls!”

“Oh!” She looked across the room, “Can I see them?”

“In just a moment,” The doctor said kindly, “You’ve suffered an awful tear. Let me stitch you up and get the bleeding stopped.”

The nurse dug away at her belly. Lucy didn’t seem to even notice. She was too lost in kissing her husband, too lost in the ecstasy of being a new mother. She had forgotten I was there.

It didn’t matter. It was not my place to be there. Not anymore.

I got to my feet and made my way down the hall. “She did it!” I said as brightly as I could, “Two girls, they have!”

“You look a little peaky, Dear,” Ana reached out for me.

“No, I’m just very pregnant,” I replied. Oliver helped me into a chair. “It was stressful. Lucy was so frightened and then just so tired. The first baby struggled a bit at first. I’m not sure she was breathing, but she’s fine now. She won’t shut up! She’s angry at us all, I reckon.”

“That’s wonderful!” Edmond pulled Ana close, “Two more girls for Grandmum!”

Oliver sat beside me, “It was bad, yeah?” He whispered.

“It was awful,” I admitted, laying my head against his shoulder, “I want to go home.”

“OK, Sweetie.”

Nigel came running in from the hall, “Auntie Sil!” He put a hand on each of my knees, “Did Mummy have our babies?”

I tried my best to seem chipper, “Yes, Nigel. Everybody’s fine.”

“Boys or girls?” He asked, “They had a picture and said it was girls, but I couldn’t tell.”

“Girls. Definitely girls.”

“Well, that’s OK,” He said as if he’d been considering it for a while.

Carolena was suddenly beside him. She removed her lolly from her mouth and looked me right in the eye, “I saw you go in there.” She said this as if no one else knew, “Tell me, Mummy, was it grotty?”

There was something in the way she said it that made her Dad and I both laugh. “Actually, Muffin,” I told her, “It was really quite grotty!”

“It’s always grotty, you!” Oliver gave her a poke. “Grotty babies!”

About that same time Natalie came running into the room, “Gran!” She shouted, “I got you a pee-an-nut butter cup!” She turned the corner too sharply, however, and slammed into a potted plant, which fell over and spilled Spanish moss everywhere. Ana let out a surprised scream and Gryffin, who was toddling in with his Granddad, immediately toppled over.

“Blimey,” Nigel slapped his little hand against his chest, “Everything all at once and you lot will give me a stroke!”

Oliver and I decided to make sure that Lucy was resting comfortably in her recovery room before we went home. We wanted to make sure Alexander was doing all right as well. Alex never said much about how he felt, but he was easily upset when someone he loved was hurt. And when Alexander got upset, it wasn’t always a simple thing for him to calm down. We’d seen him go on for days in misery.

When we entered the room, Ana was leaned over Alexander in his chair. Her chin was on his shoulder and her arms were around his chest. She held him for a long time, rocking him like he was a child, even though he was probably twice her size. He patted her arm gently in return.

“Are you all right, Dear?” She whispered, “Is there anything you need?”

“No, Mum. Thank you.”

“Supper?”

“No, they said they’d bring me something to eat from downstairs.”

She kissed the top of his head and stood.

Edmond stroked a piece of hair away from Lucy’s forehead, “She’s white as a ghost.”

“She lost a lot of blood, so she’s pale. They gave her something after,” Alexander whispered, “Something to bring down her blood pressure. They said she’d rest for a good while.” He glanced at his brother and then at me, “That was bloody terrifying. I don’t think we ought to do that again.”

“Maybe not,” I said honestly, “But it’s over now.”

He nodded.

“Well, we’re taking the children home with us,” Ana announced, “So Silvia can get some sleep. She doesn’t need any more excitement in her condition,” Everyone was worried that I’d go into labour and being ridiculously pregnant, I did not pass up the chance to agree to some quiet time. Ana smiled suddenly, “Two girls, Alexander! I’m so happy!”

“Yes,” Edmond mussed Alex’s hair, “We both are!”

We hugged and kissed the parents and children goodbye and left Alexander alone with his wife, but Oliver and I didn’t leave the hospital for a while. Instead we stood in front of the nursery window and stared in at our new nieces.

“I thought twins skipped generations,” I rested my cheek against the rough wool of Oliver’s sweater.

“They usually do,” He responded quietly, “Which is which?”

“I have no idea.”

“I asked Mum once how she kept Alex and me separate. She said she kept the tag on our wrists as long as she could. Then she put an O and an A on the bottoms of our feet with magic marker. After that, she made sure she dressed us different, but she lost track when we started switching clothes on her. Eventually, she just knew. Nobody’s identical. There’s always something that tells us apart.”

“I thought I was going to lose my sister in there,” I said softly, “I was so scared for her.”

“I knew she was in trouble. I could hear her. I was worried, but you Cotton girls, you’re fiery.” Oliver put his hand on my swollen belly, “Too bad we didn’t have the twins.”

“What would we have called them?”

“Certainly not Antonia and Elizabeth! Awful names, those are! Now Heloise and Gertrude, I’d have named them!”

“Oh, yes, Antonia and Elizabeth are just terrible! But I like Helga and Euphemia much better than your choices.”

“Oh, can’t we have Euphemia and Heloise, Love? If we have twins?”

“Definitely!”

We laughed quietly.

“I can’t see them well enough,” Oliver said. “I’m too tired.”

“Me, too. This is boring. Let’s go home and have sex. Maybe I’ll go into labour.”

“Excellent! I’m all for that! Sex is what got us into this predicament and it’s what’ll get us out!”

“With any luck! My back is killing me!”

“At least I can’t get you pregnant, yeah?”

“No more than you already have.”

Oliver wrapped his arm around my shoulder for support as we began to walk away. “Maybe we ought to find a linen closet and try it here. We won’t have to come back if you do go into labour.”

Oliver could always make me laugh, even when my back was in knots and I was exhausted.

We went home, but any ideas of fooling about were gone as soon as we saw the bed. Once on it, we were both immediately asleep.

It was one in the morning three weeks later when I shook Oliver awake, “Sweetheart! Sweetheart!” He was never easy to wake up even on his best day. I licked my finger and stuck it in his ear, “Oliver, wake up!”

“W-what?” He sat straight up, “Is it Duncan? Did he win?”

“Oh, wake up!” I popped him on the side of his head, “Your mum’s on her way over. I’m contracting. They’re twenty minutes apart, let’s go.”