After the Storm: Clean Historical Western Cowboy Romance Novel (Dawson Chronicles Book 2) (20 page)

*****

              Renee changed for bed and sat down on a chair, trying to soothe her nerves before Tim arrived.  When he did, her stomach started to hurt because she could almost feel his anger.

              He sat on the bed and looked at her.  “How could you do that?”

              Renee said, “I had to help catch them, Tim.  I needed to put them in jail so they can’t hurt me or any other woman.  I doubt that I’m the only one they’ve assaulted.”

              Tim nodded.  “I understand, and I’m proud of you for having the courage to face them.  That’s not what I’m talking about.”

              Her brows drew together as confusion filled her.  “Then what
are
you talking about?”

              “Renee, haven’t I been there for you through everything?  Given you unconditional love, support, and comfort?”

              She moved over to the bed and tried to take his hand, but he pulled away from her.  “Of course you have, and I’ll never be able to repay you.”

              His face tightened.  “I don’t want repayment.  Don’t you trust me?”

              Her eyes grew bigger.  “I trust you implicitly, Tim.  Completely.”

              “Then how could you not tell me about this plan?  How could you not include me in something so important?  I’m your husband.”

              The hurt in his eyes made her heart ache.  “I’m so sorry.”

              “If you couldn’t tell me about this, what else are you withholding from me?”  He got up and paced back and forth.

              “Nothing, I swear,” she said. 

              “Are you sure about that?  I know how sneaky you can be,” Tim said.  “You could be hiding something else.”

              His belligerent attitude pricked her temper.  “Excuse me?  Are you saying that I’m a liar?”

              “Maybe not a liar, but you’re good at keeping secrets and formulating crafty plans.”

              Her hands fisted in the comforter.  “Tell me something, Tim.  If you had known about the plan, would you have let me do it?”

              He crossed his arms over his chest and looked away from her.

              “Exactly.  You would have tried to do something to prevent me from helping to catch them.  You would have let them go free by doing so.  So, no, I didn’t tell you—or anyone outside of my father and the sheriff’s department,” Renee said.

              His eyes that were usually filled with warmth when he looked at her stared coldly at her.  “You didn’t even give me a chance.”

              She stood up, trembling with rage.  “You have no idea what it’s like to be tackled to the floor, repeatedly hit, each blow harder than the last.  You don’t know the shame, the terror I felt as those men ripped open my nightgown and did detestable, degrading things to me.  Until you know that kind of fear, that kind of pain and sheer horror, you have no right to judge the way I’m dealing with this.

              “I did what I had to so they were caught and if that meant not telling anyone about our plan, then so be it.  I wasn’t going to let anything stand in the way of doing something about what happened to me and showing them that I wasn’t going to let them ruin my life by being a cowering, weak woman.  I wouldn’t give them that satisfaction, that power.  I’m sorry that I hurt you, but I did what I had to.”

              Tim shook with rage at the images her words brought to mind and his heart filled with hurt that she’d felt that he wouldn’t have supported her decision.

              “I’m going to sleep in one of the other bedrooms,” he said stiffly. 

              He quickly left the room, leaving Renee to stare after him in disbelief and sadness.  The stress of the evening got to her and she needed an outlet.  After dressing, she went to the garage and cranked their Model T to life.  As she drove away from the estate, tears ran down her face.  She went to Sawyer and Devon’s house, knowing that she could talk to them.

              She was relieved to see lamplight in their parlor windows.  She knocked on their door and Devon answered it.  Devon saw that Renee was upset.

              “Come in.  Are you all right?” she asked.

              “Not really.  Will you lend me an ear?”

              “Of course.  Come sit in the parlor,” Devon said.

              Renee looked around the homey room.  She liked the oak paneling, pretty pictures, and comfortable furniture.  A large blue-and-white braided rug that matched the curtains covered much of the hardwood floor.

              She greeted Sawyer, who relaxed in one of the wingback chairs that sat in a corner.

              “Hi,” he said, his brown eyes roaming over her.  “You don’t look so good.  What happened?”

              Devon had put the kettle on and now she settled on the sofa by Renee. 

              Renee’s tale poured forth, her words coming fast as she related the events of that night.  “And now, Tim thinks that I don’t trust him and that there are other things that I haven’t told him.  I’ve told him that there’s nothing else that I’ve kept from him.  I trust him completely, but I was afraid that if he knew about this plan that he would keep me from doing it.  It would have been out of concern and love, but he might have kept me from carrying it out.”

              Devon nodded.  “He might have.  Tim loves you so much that he’d do anything to keep you safe.  But you don’t know that for sure.”

              Sawyer said, “One thing that we’ve learned since we’ve been married is that we tell each other everything.  If we have a difference of opinion we work through it.  Withholding things will just lead to problems, just like it did with you and Tim.”

              “I
have
told him everything.  Just not that,” Renee said.

              Devon said, “I think the problem is that you kept such an important thing from him.”

              Renee put her head in her hands.  “You’re right.  It was an important thing.  I let my need for revenge consume me and I didn’t consider his feelings.  I should have talked to him.  Now what do I do?  He doesn’t want to talk to me.”

              Sawyer chuckled.  “I’ve been where you are and it’s not fun.  Let him cool down and then swallow your pride and apologize.  That’s what I did with Devon and it eventually got through to her.”

              Devon said, “But so did Renee.  You made me see that I was also letting pride get in the way of my happiness with Sawyer and I’m grateful to you for that.”

              Renee gave her a wan smile.  “I’m glad I could help.”

              Devon fixed them all some tea and she and Sawyer tried to bolster Renee’s spirits.  They also praised her for being so brave in assisting with the rapists’ capture.  By the time she left, she felt a little better.  It didn’t last, however.  Their bedroom was still empty.  Renee changed for bed and slid under the covers, but she didn’t sleep.  Instead, she watched the hands of their windup clock go around until her eyelids finally closed near morning.

*****

              The next morning, Tim came into their room as Renee was dressing.  He ignored the desire that shot through him at the sight of her and gathered some clothes.

              “Tim, I know that you’re upset with me, and I’m so sorry that I hurt you.  I never meant to.”

              “Well, you did, and I’m so angry with you,” he said.  “I can’t believe that you shut me out like that.”  The pain in his heart made his chest ache.  “I’m your husband, but you couldn’t trust me.”

              “Tim, please try to understand—”

              He collected his clothes with angry movements.  “I can’t talk about this.  I have to get to work.”

              “What about breakfast?” she asked.

              “I’m not hungry.”  He gave her a sad glance and left the room.

              Renee forced back her tears as she finished dressing.  She put on her actress persona and went out to breakfast, smiling as she sat down at the table.  Several of the family could see past her façade, however, and they knew that Tim had slept in a different room.  Joe thought it was a shame that they were fighting, and he surmised that it had something to do with the capture of those men, but he didn’t know the details of what had happened.

              Everyone loved Renee and enjoyed her witty banter.  She fit in well with the family and Joe and Lacey were happy with the addition of their new daughter-in-law.  The kids often asked her to read them stories because she acted out the parts as though putting on a play.  She played tag and hide-and-seek with them.  Renee enjoyed being around them and looked forward to having children with Tim.

              As she ate her breakfast, she didn’t taste the food.  In her state of distress, it had no flavor and she didn’t see the beauty of the sunshine or hear the lilting melody of the birds.  She went about her day, but there was no joy in her heart.  Normally, she enjoyed her job, but that day it was hard to find any enthusiasm for going to work. 

              Although she was pleasant and attentive to the customers, her anguish showed in her eyes and Jake and Andy were concerned about her.  Renee left work as soon as she could that night, hoping that Tim would be receptive to her.  However, she found their room empty and knew that he wouldn’t be sleeping there that night. 

              Over the next week, Renee repeatedly tried to talk to Tim without success.  He’d closed himself off behind a wall of anger and pain.  The more he rebuffed her, the hotter Renee’s anger burned.  Eventually she stopped trying.

              Joey hated seeing his big brother in pain and he hated seeing Renee so sad.  Going to bed one night, he put his arms around Snow Song and asked, “How’d you like to help get Tim and Renee back together?”

              She snuggled closer.  “I’d love to.  What did you have in mind?”

              “Well, Renee says that every time she tries to talk to him, he brushes her off and leaves.  We’re gonna make it so that he can’t do that and he has to listen to her,” Joey said.  “See what you think of this idea…”

*****

              Tim finished cleaning a stall and came out of it.  Joey stood at the end of the corridor of stalls.

              “Hey, Timmy.  Can you come help me in the storeroom a second?” he called out.

              “Yeah.  I’ll be right there,” Tim said, moving his wheelbarrow to the next stall he was going to clean.

              He found Joey in the storeroom.  “What do you need?”

              Joey moved up to him and said, “Now!”

              Tim hadn’t seen Kyle and Sonny Grayson near the doorway inside.  The three men jumped Tim, forcing him into a chair they’d put in the middle of the room. 

              “What the heck are you guys doing?” Tim asked, struggling against them.

              He was no match for the other three strong men and they tied him securely to the chair.

              “Why are you doing this?” he demanded.

              “Because you’re being an idiot,” Kyle said.

              They heard Snow Song approaching with Renee.

              “You have to see these kittens.  They’re so cute.  One of them reminds me of Romeo,” she said, leading Renee into the storeroom.

              Renee looked around at the men and saw Tim tied to the chair, his face a mask of fury.

              Joey took hold of her arms and moved her away from the door.  “Just stand there a moment.”

              The others ran from the room, slammed the door shut, and locked it from the outside.

              Renee ran to the door, pounding on it.  “Let us out!  Hey!  Open the door!”

              “Not until you talk this out!” Joey hollered back.

              “Open this door now, Jr.!”  There was no response.  She let out a noise of frustration and then turned to face Tim. 

              He glared at her and Renee became angry.

              “Don’t look at me like that, like I’m some enemy,” she said.  “I’m your wife and I deserve a chance to explain things to you, but you won’t talk to me.  Do you want the rest of our marriage to be like this?”

              Tim’s jaw clenched.  “No.”

              “Then talk to me.  I want to work this out,” she said approaching him.  “I miss you.  I miss our life together and I miss sleeping with you at night.”

              The way she walked accentuated her shapely figure in her skirt and blouse and he knew she was doing it on purpose.  He’d discovered that Renee could be a seductress and she excited him like no other woman.  Even as angry as he was he wanted her with a ferocious intensity.

              Renee silently thanked her friends for giving her the opportunity to set things right between them.  She surprised Tim by coming right to him and straddling his lap.  Her weight settled on him and his hunger grew stronger.  She smelled so good and he longed to touch her.

              “Tim, I’ve apologized for hurting you several times.  I’ll keep doing it if that’s what it takes to get through to you, but I never tried to hurt you.  I’m sorry for keeping you in the dark.  I let my desire to get revenge blind me to how you would feel when you learned about our plan.  It was wrong of me and I’ll always regret it.  Can’t you please forgive me?”

              It was hard to think when she was running her hands over his shoulders and her sweet lips were only inches from his, but he gathered his wits.  “I’m your husband—the person you’re supposed to trust and count on the most.  I can tell you with complete certainty that while I would have hated you trying to pull off a dangerous stunt like that, that I would have understood and helped you with it.

              “But you didn’t give me that opportunity.  And part of why I’ve been so mad is selfish.  I would’ve liked to have had a part in bringing those asses to justice!  I would’ve liked just a few minutes with them to make them sorry for what they did to you.”  Tears stung the backs of his eyes.  “It’s my job to protect you and I didn’t get to be there for you!  I didn’t get to see your bravery and the looks on those guys’ faces when you caught them!  I want to be part of your crazy schemes and share everything with you.  Don’t you want that, too?”

              She suddenly understood.  She’d robbed him of the chance to help get revenge upon the men who’d hurt her so badly.  “Of course, I do.  I want to share everything with you, too.  I swear that I’m not keeping anything else from you and that I’ll never have any secrets from you again.  I promise you that.”

              Tim read the sincerity in her eyes and saw that she was genuinely contrite.  He’d learned when Renee was acting and when she wasn’t. 

              “Please forgive me?”

              He couldn’t stay angry in the face of her honest plea.  “You swear that you’ll never have any secrets from me again?”

              She smiled as hope surged through her.  “I swear it.”

              A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.  “Ok.  I forgive you.”

              She embraced him, tears trickling from her eyes.  “Thank you so much.  I love you and I would never hurt you on purpose, Timmy.  You
are
the person I trust most and I need you so much.  You make me so happy, and I want to make you happy, too.”

              His dark eyes were once again filled with that familiar warmth that she loved so much.  “You do make me happy.  Happier than I ever thought possible.  I knew after Devon’s wedding that I wanted you for my own and I set out to get you.”

              She ran her fingers through his hair.  “And you did get me.  I’m so glad that you captured my heart.  No other man would have stood by me the way you have.  No other man could have loved me the way you did.  And I would never have wanted any other man to make love to me for the first time.  You showed me how beautiful making love is supposed to be and you’ve shown me every time since.  My heart, my soul, my body—all of it belongs to you, Tim, and it always will.”

              Tim responded urgently to her when she kissed him and his arms strained at the ropes that bound him as his need to touch her grew.  He growled against her mouth as her kiss grew more aggressive.  Quick as a flash, she had his shirt unbuttoned and parted.  Her talented hands ran over his muscular chest, fanning his desire into a white-hot flame.

              He tore his lips from hers.  “For God’s sake, Renee!  Quit torturing me and untie me!”

              She loved the way his broad chest rose and fell with his ragged breathing.  “My, my, but you look so tasty.”  She lightly bit him and pressed kisses along his collarbone.

              “Renee, untie me!”

              Chuckling, Renee slid off him and released his ropes.  She squealed in surprise and excitement as he crushed her against him and gave her a demanding kiss before dragging her to the floor with him.  Then he got up, ran to the storeroom door, and turned the inside lock so even if it was unlocked it from the outside, no one could get in.

              He came back and they laughed as they tried to get each other’s clothes off.  Finally they accomplished it and embraced, releasing all of their pent-up passion for each other.  There in the dimly lit storeroom, they reconnected, once again giving themselves to the person they loved most in the world.