Against the Rules (24 page)

“The offer is still open,” he growled softly, the words whispering against her lips. “Just tell me why you're accepting it. Are you pregnant? Is that it?”

“No!” she denied, startled. “It isn't that. I mean, I don't know. How could I know yet? There hasn't been time.”

“Then why are you agreeing to marry me?” he persisted. “Tell me, Cat.”

He was pinning her down, refusing to let her hide behind anything, and suddenly she didn't want to hide. Serenity and inner strength flooded her. Let him have his confession. She could give it to him out of the richness of her love. She freed her hand from under his and cupped his face in both palms, her fingers lovingly molding the hard contours of his jaw. “Because I love you, Rule Jackson,” she said with aching tenderness. “I've loved you for years...for what seems like forever. And it doesn't matter if you don't love me, if the ranch is all you care about. If you want the ranch, you have to take me. It's a package deal. So, Mr. Jackson, you'd better start learning how to be a husband.”

He looked thunderstruck and his grip on her hair tightened. “Are you crazy?” he shouted. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“The ranch,” she said steadily. “If you want it, you have to marry me to get it.”

Raw fury began to form visibly on his face, in his eyes. He said something that didn't bear repeating, but it illustrated his feelings. His entire body shuddered as what little control he had left exploded, and he roared at her, “To hell with the ranch! Sell it! If that's what's been standing between us for all of these years, then get rid of it! If you want to live in Chicago, or Hong Kong, or Bangkok, then I'll live there with you, because
you're
what I've always wanted, not this damned ranch! My God, Cat, I've got a ranch of my own if that was what I wanted! Dad left everything to me when he died, you know.” His hand swept over her body. “Did you think
this
was because I wanted the ranch? Sweet hell, woman, can't you tell that you make me crazy?”

Her blank expression told him that she had never even thought of it from that angle. He pulled her down on the bed beside him and clamped her to his side. “Listen to me,” he said slowly, deliberately, every word separate and distinct. “I don't want the ranch. It's a good life and it saved me, and I'd miss it if we lived somewhere else, but I can live without it. What I can't live without anymore is you. I've tried. For eight years I got through life day by day, feeding myself on the memory of the one time I'd had you, hating myself for driving you away. When you finally came back I knew I'd never be able to let you go again. I'll do whatever it takes to keep you, honey, because if you walk out on me again I might as well stop living.”

Cathryn felt as if her heart had stopped beating. He hadn't actually said the words yet, but he was telling her that he loved her as desperately, as powerfully as she loved him. It was almost more than she could take in, more than she could allow herself to believe. “I didn't know,” she whispered dazedly. “You never said...you never told me.”

“How could I tell you?” he asked roughly. “You were so young, too young for everything I wanted from you. I never meant for that day by the river to happen, but when it did I couldn't regret it. I wanted to do it again, over and over, until that terrified look in your eyes was gone and you looked at me with the same need I felt for you. But I didn't, and you ran. I regret that, because you met David Ashe and married him. It's a good thing you didn't come around for quite a while after that, Cat, because I've never wanted to take a man apart as badly as I did him.”

“You were jealous?” She still couldn't make herself comprehend everything he was telling her, and she pinched herself surreptitiously; the small pain was real, and so was the man who lay beside her.

The look he gave her spoke volumes. “Jealous isn't the word for it. I was insane with it.”

“You love me,” she whispered in wonder. “You really love me. If only you'd told me! I had no idea!”

“Of course I love you! I
need
you, and I've never needed anyone before in my life. You were as wild and innocent as a foal, and I couldn't keep my eyes away from you. You made me feel alive again, made me forget the nightmares that jerked me up in bed. When I made love to you, we fit together perfectly. Everything was right, all the moves and reactions. You nearly burned me alive every time I touched you. I had to be with you, had to see you and talk to you, and you had no idea how I felt?”

He looked outraged, and Cathryn managed a small laugh as she snuggled closer to him. “It's that stone face of yours,” she teased. “But I was so afraid of letting you know how I felt, afraid you didn't feel the same way.”

“I feel the same,” he said gruffly, then demanded, “Tell me again.” He slid his palm up her side and cupped a breast. “Let me hear it again.”

“I love you.” She complied gladly, joyously with his demand. Saying the words aloud was a celebration, a benediction.

“Will you tell me that when we're making love?”

“As often as you want,” she promised.

“I want. Now.” His voice had roughened with desire and he pulled her to him, his mouth clinging to hers. The old familiar magic seared through her veins again and she melted against him, not noticing when he unbuttoned her shirt, only aware of the intense pleasure she felt when his hand touched her bare skin.

A dying glimmer of caution prompted her words. “Rule...we shouldn't. You need to rest.”

“That's not what I need,” he murmured in her ear. “Now, Cathryn.
Now.
”

“The door is open,” she protested weakly.

“Then close it and come back to me. Don't make me chase you down.”

He probably would, she thought, broken leg and all. She got up and closed the door, then came back to him. She couldn't touch him enough, couldn't satisfy her need to feel his hard, warm flesh beneath her fingers. She made love to him, lavishing him with her love, trailing kisses all over him and whispering “I love you” against his skin, imprinting him with the words. Now that she could say the words aloud, she found that she couldn't say them enough, and she made a litany of them as she loved him, lingering so long in her caresses that suddenly he couldn't take any more, lifting her bodily above him and fusing his flesh with hers in a quick, strong movement.

She danced the dance of passion with him, attacking and retreating, but always pleasuring. She was aware of nothing but him, the hot desire in his dark eyes, and something else, the glow of love returned.

“Don't stop saying it,” he commanded, and she obeyed until the words wouldn't come, until all she could do was gasp his name and writhe against him. His powerful hands on her hips took over the motion, driving her higher and higher, until with an almost silent wail she collapsed, shuddering, on his chest.

In the quiet, sleepy aftermath he smoothed her tousled hair and held her tightly to him. “I'll need to hire more hands,” he said drowsily.

“Mmmm,” said Cathryn. “Why?”

“To take up the slack. I can tell right now that I won't be spending as much time on the range. I'll have a major problem just getting out of bed in the mornings. Taking care of a woman like you will be time-consuming, and I intend to do my best.”

“I'll drink to that,” she toasted, lifting an imaginary glass.

“We'll get married next week,” he said, nuzzling his face into her hair.

“Next week?” She made a startled move away from him. “But you're still—”

“I'll be up by then,” he soothed. “Trust me. And ask Monica if she and Ricky will stay for the wedding. Always mend your fences, honey.”

She smiled. “I know. I don't want any bad feelings between us. And who knows? Lewis may keep Ricky here.”

“Don't put any money on it. They both have too many hurts bottled up inside. He may want her, but I don't think he could live with her. Things don't always work out the way you want them to.”

Silence fell again, and she felt herself slipping into sleep. A thought nagged at the edges of her consciousness, and she muttered, “I'm sorry about the tack room.”

“It wasn't your fault,” he comforted, his arms tightening about her.

“You called me stupid.”

“I apologize. I panicked at the thought of you going into a burning stable, fighting with those horses to get them out. What if something had happened to you? I'd have gone mad.”

“You don't blame me?” she whispered.

“I love you,” he corrected. “I couldn't stand it if you were hurt.”

She felt as if her heart would burst with happiness. So that tantrum had been purely because he didn't want her taking risks! She opened her eyes and looked up at him from where she lay with her head cradled on his powerful shoulder, and softly, as tenderly as a dream, she said, “I love you.”

Rule's arms tightened around her even more, and he murmured, “I love you.”

A moment later his deep voice drifted into the silence. “Welcome home, honey.”

And at last she
was
home, in Rule's arms, where she belonged.

* * * * *