Aint too proud to beg sfdg-1 (12 page)

Rick unhooked his fingers and swiveled around in his chair to face Teeny. She doesnt dress like a librarian.

Fair enough. A kindergarten teacher, then.

She doesnt dress like a kindergarten teacher, either.

Youre right. My bad. Teeny held out a palm in concession. Let me start over. He cleared his throat. So, was Josephine Sheehan a wild thing up under that obituary writers wardrobe?

Yup.

Damn!

But I dont kiss and tell.

Hey, man, up until recently, you didnt even kiss.

This is very true.

So whats next?

I have absolutely no idea.

Thats when Rick got up from his desk chair and walked to the glass wall of his office. Beyond he could see the UC Berkeley campus, the Bay, and the city of San Francisco spread out before him.

Uh… Teeny rubbed a hand over his shiny bald head. Are you saying you may not want to see her again? Because weve got some serious man hours invested in Miss Sheehan.

Oh, no. Im sure I want to see her again. Shes all Ive been thinking about this morning. In fact, were having dinner tonight. And Im thinking about bringing her to the ranch.

Okay. Teeny nodded soberly. Then its the tattooshe must have hated the freaky snake shit, huh?

Rick turned to his friend and shook his head, laughing softly. She doesnt love it, but she didnt run out of the room screaming, either.

Its a start.

It is.

And did you tell her about?

No. Rick didnt need to hear the whole question. He knew Teeny was asking if hed told Josie about how he acquired the tattoohis six-month, hallucinogenic journey through the Asian subcontinent that ended with the last-minute reprieve from a Thai prison sentence, not the first time his daddy had saved his ass, nor would it be the last.

See, thats where Im stuck, Teeny, Rick said with a sigh. I dont how much truth she can hear and still want to be with me. And I dont know when to start telling her. And I know that I cant have a real relationship with a woman unless she knows where Ive come from.

I hear you, Teeny said.

All I know is that last night was not the time to mention any of it.

Teeny nodded. I can see how the serpents would be plenty for one night.

You got to ease the girl into the situation, right?

Rick laughed outright. I dont know /what/ Im supposed to do! Thats the point! And Ive got to tell you Rick looked at his friend and shook his head in consternation. Im starting to think the self-denial routine all these years wasnt just about going straightIm thinking maybe I shut myself off from the world to avoid facing my past.

Teeny uncrossed his legs and leaned forward in the chair, a deep frown creasing his forehead. Im not following you, Rick. All Ive seen you do since Ive known you is make amends for your mistakes, fix all that can be fixed, do the right thing at every turn. I havent seen you avoid a single damn thing, mannot once.

Rick paced back and forth in front of the glass wall. Hed already made the decision to let Josie into his life, and he didnt regret it. Hed already made the decision to trust her and be good to herit was a done deal. But those decisions werent based on his feelings for Josie alone.

He also had reams of information about everything in her lifeher relationships, her credit score, her family and friends, her driving recordthere hadnt been a single thing untouched by those man hours Teeny mentioned.

But what did Josie know about /him/? She knew what he told her. And even if she Googled him, shed only find old newspaper clips about the accident, the charges that were dropped, and the pending civil case.

Unfortunately, the juicy details would have to come from Rick himself, details he feared would send a woman like Josie out the door.

Teeny rubbed his hands together in agitation. Shell see youve changed.

If she cares for you, shell keep the past where it belongs.

Rick scratched at his beard stubble, then let his hand run down his throat. It reminded him of all the kisses hed left on Josies neck last night. How warm and soft she was. How damn good she smelledlike cinnamon rolls from the bakery, like sweet, hot woman flesh. And that laugh of hers! He hoped that hed hear that joyous, free laugh a million times before his time on earth was done.

Rick?

Huh?

Damn, dude. You werent joking.

About what?

Teeny got up from the chair and joined Rick at the glass wall. You know, one of the things Ive always admired about you is that when you set your mind to something, you make it happen. No hemming and hawingyou just do what you have to do to get it done. Celestial Pet is a perfect example.

Youve built it from nothing to a successful company in just six years.

Its amazing.

Thanks. But its not like I did it aloneyou were with me. And so were my fathers resources.

Teeny put his hand on Ricks shoulder. What Im saying is youve taken the same approach to Josie.

Rick looked sideways at him, shoving his hands into his shorts pockets.

How so?

Teeny smiled. Well, my friend, once you made your decision to deviate from the plan, you deviated the living fuck out of it.

Rick chuckled.

I think youre already in love with this girl.

Rick didnt say anything, mostly because there wasnt enough air in his lungs to speak. He coughed instead. And blinked a few times.

Youve gone from zero to ninety in a matter of days, Rousseau.

I know I have.

No more crashes for you, got it? Thats all Im saying.

Rick looked up into his tall friends face and saw moisture forming in his eyes. Teeny, I wouldnt have survived without you.

No shit, he said. Same for me. Teeny wiped his cheeks and took a deep breath. Okay. So while were on the subject of friends, we really should talk about the dog ladies.

Rick was baffled. The /who/?

Josies friends, you knowthe girls gym teacher, the movie star from /Gilligans Island,/ and the young Demi Moore.

As I recall, they have names, Teeny.

Yeah, well, they were hanging out under a tree next door to Josies place last night, waiting on you to come out. And I spotted them earlier at an outdoor table at Bikos. More importantly, they saw me see /them/. So theyre probably scratching their heads right about now, trying to figure out why the chauffeur for Josies new boy toy has been spying on them.

Rick grimaced. This could be awkward.

Mark my word, Rousseau. Teeny gave Ricks back a friendly slap. The dog ladies are going to start yanking your chain.

Why would they do that?

Because you just busted up their all-girls club, man! And besides, they got nothing better to do.

The sound of the door opening made Rick and Teeny turn in tandem.

Instinctively, Teeny reached for the semiautomatic pistol tucked inside his waistband.

Its just little ole me, Gwen Anders said, her golden hair spilling over her shoulder as she peeked in the door. She smiled at both of them. Hope Im not interrupting.

G
ood afternoon! Welcome to Wal-Mart!

Bennett Cummings wasnt certain of the protocol here, due to the fact that hed never set foot in a big-box discount store in his life, let alone this particular establishment in Worcester, Massachusetts. But he smiled at the man in the vest, said thank you, and carried on with his mission.

Hed come for clothing and a few necessities for the road. Within seconds of entering the huge structure hed spied a pharmacy, a hair salon, a floral shop, an optometrists office, a bank, a tax preparation kiosk, a McDonalds, and a manicure shop, not to mention the giant supermarket operation in the other half of the building. /My God,/ Bennett thought, /the Waltons of Arkansas will own the country outright within five years./ In the mens department he selected a cheap vinyl belt and two pairs of dungarees of dubious quality, plus a plaid overshirt with a polyester quilted lining. He chose a baseball cap that proclaimed GOD BLESS THE USA! in red, white, and blue script. He selected a few T-shirts, one of which featured something called a monster truck, which had the most grossly ill-proportioned tires hed ever seen on a vehicle. He chose some sneakers, socks, and undershorts.

He grabbed a first-aid kit from the camping department. He selected a small cooler that would fit a few cans of soda and a sandwich or two. He found a pine-scented air freshener in the auto department and a Rand McNally Road Atlas in the aisle of books and magazines.

Somehow, as the purchases began to fill his cart, he felt jubilation.

Perhaps it was because he was finally moving forward. Regardless of how it would end, the process had begun.

Im gonna knock your fuckin ass to kingdom come if you dont put that shit down! /Now!/ Bennett stopped and spun around in his tracks at the sound of the shrill female voice. The object of her scorn was a child no more than five, who was clutching some kind of action figure in his hand, eyes wide from the harsh scolding.

Put it down, you moron! Didnt you hear what I said?

Bennetts heart cracked. He couldnt help but recall Margot at that age, all golden perfection and smiles, one hundred percent human potential.

In essence, no different from the little snotty fellow whose own mother just called a moron.

The woman caught him staring.

Take a picture, why dont you?

A pitiful wail rose from an infant car seat perched precariously on the handle of the womans shopping cart.

Bennett continued to stare at the trio.

Look, asshole, dont fuck with me. Im not exactly having the best day of my life.

We all have bad days, Bennett said softly. But we should do everything in our power not to take it out on the children.

The woman was so offended she nearly spat. She rested a fist upon a roll of flesh that may have once been her hip, then gave him a fierce once-over, from his four-thousand-dollar custom-made lambs wool sport coat to his Gucci moccasins.

What the fuck do you know about bad days?

This was exactly why Bennett had come to Wal-Marthe wanted to tone down his look. He wanted to be just another person on the road, sitting in a rundown Buick, going somewhere or nowhere with his sodas and his sandwiches and his USA baseball cap, not registering in anyones memory for any reason, whatsoever.

Pardon me for intruding on what is clearly a private matter, Bennett said. Its just that I recently lost my daughter. Its been difficult.

The mother, who was hardly more than a child herself, gave her neck a few back-and-forth rotations, then huffed. She die or something?

Yes.

She get the cancer?

She died from injuries sustained in a motorcycle accident.

The woman ran a hand through her rather greasy-looking light brown hair and nodded. My kids daddy has a bike. Hes gonna kill himself one day, I keep telling him.

Bennett nodded. He noticed that the little boy had put down the action figure and cautiously moved closer. Hello, young man, Bennett said.

Whazzup? the youngster said.

His mother thought her sons disrespect was hilarious. When her laughter subsided, she looked at Bennett thoughtfully, then said, Well, mind your own business, is all Im saying.

He had no idea what possessed him, but he reached in his wallet and pulled out a crisp hundred. Buy your son the toy, he said.

She frowned. You some kind of sick fuck or something?

Bennett had to laugh, because, technically, the answer to that exceedingly vulgar question was a resounding /yes/. He was on his way to commit premeditated homicide, after all. But he meant the child no harm.

Here. He handed her the money.

The young woman squinted at him. Are you shitting me? She took it in her hand, turned it over, examined the bill for signs of forgery. By this time, her baby was flat-out screaming.

Have a good day, Bennett said, steering his cart in the opposite direction and walking away. He heard the little boy ask if he could hold the money.

Bennett moseyed into the grocery area and picked up some peanut butter and a six-pack of single-serving mixed fruit. He got some bottled water, some root beer, a loaf of whole-wheat bread, and some sliced turkey breast. He paid for his purchases with cash, then went into the mens room where he put on his new ensemble, including the ball cap. He stuffed his expensive clothing into a trashcan overflowing with damp paper towels.

His destiny called.

I wasnt expecting you, Gwen.

Regardless, the executive director of his charitable foundation was now standing in the middle of Ricks office, so he motioned for her to take the seat recently occupied by Teeny.

Timothy, a pleasure to see you as always, she said.

Miss Anders. Teeny acknowledged Gwen with a nod, then shot Rick a sharp look. Talk to you later, he said, walking out and closing the door behind him.

I had no choice but to barge in on you, Rick. Youve been avoiding me.

Gwen made herself comfortable in the leather-and-steel side chair, crossing her legs for maximum effect. Gwen was dressed, as usual, in a flawless custom-tailored pastel-colored suit, three-inch-high pointy-toed pumps that fell somewhere between basic business and overtly sexy. Shed worn her hair down, however, which was unusual for her, as she usually pulled it back in a bun or put it up in some kind of twist at the nape of her neck. Rick wondered if Gwen had something special planned for this particular visit.

I havent been avoiding you, Gwen. Rick returned to his desk chair. Ive been a little preoccupied lately.

Havent we all? Gwen gave him a tolerant smile. Then she reached into the portfolio case at her feet and pulled out an ultrathin laptop. She placed it on the surface of her tight skirt, opened it, clicked a single key, and spun it around to face him. On the screen was a colorful bar graph with a pronounced downward slope.

The Meadowbrook Foundation has lost eleven percent of its net worth in the last six months, due to the volatility of the market. Ive desperately needed your direction these past three weeks but youve ignored all my calls, e-mails, and text messages. So, Im here today to inform you that in the last thirty days alone, youve lost seven million dollars. In all good conscience, I should probably tender my resignation.

Rick shook his head slowly. Spare me the histrionics, Gwen. You know youve done nothing wrong.

Rick sighed. When his father died, he became the sole beneficiary of an estate so huge that seven million seemed like loose change. At first, all Rick could do was stare at the stack of papers his fathers legal team had delivered, baffled by the gibberish. He was still in severe pain and going to outpatient physical therapy five days a week. He had no idea what to do with all the money. In fact, he hadnt decided what to do with his life, or even if he deserved to have one.

The size of his fathers estateand the responsibility it entailedwas mind-boggling. It took Rick a few months, but he eventually decided to sever all ties with his past. His parents were gone and he had no brothers or sisters, so there was no reason to stay in Rhode Island. He sold the importing business to his fathers lifelong competitor. He cashed out his fathers investments, stashing most of it away in offshore accounts. And he began the long process of healingbody, mind, and spirit.

Even before his move out west, Rick took fifty million off the top to establish his foundation. He named it for the country road where he wrecked his bike and his life. One of his fathers attorneys recommended Gwen Anders to run it and Rick heartily agreed. She was brilliant, impeccably honest, and willing to do whatever was necessary to keep his name out of the public domain. His only interest was in helping people with traumatic head injuries receive the care they needed. He did it to ransom his spirit. He did it in Margots honor, because it was the only thing hed ever be able to do for her.

Well? Gwen waited patiently as Rick studied the graph. Then he met her gaze.

We start from here and do the best we can, he said. Its only money.

Gwen laughed, tossing her hair back as she did so. Interestingly, when hed hired her six years before, Rick barely noticed her beauty. It was as if hed cut himself off so thoroughly from the world of women that her stunning looks didnt register. Of course, his respect for her business acumen had grown over the years, and hed long ago privately acknowledged that she was extraordinarily good-looking.

But Rick hadnt been interested in Gwen. He hadnt been interested in women, period. So Gwen had taken it upon herself to change his mind with one barely suggestive comment or subtle tactical strike after another, for six years now. Her approach was so understated that he sometimes wondered if he were imagining it, but Teeny was always there to shed light on the truth: Gwen was determinedly, irrevocably, hot for her boss.

Ive made arrangements for us to have dinner with our team from Staunton and Blalock tonight. Gwen turned the laptop away from Rick and closed it shut, obviously annoyed that hed barely glanced at her hard work.

Tonight? Rick sat up straight. I cant.

Gwen laughed softly and shook her head. You have no choice, Rick. I know you say youve been preoccupiedand the nature of your distraction is none of my businessbut surely youve noticed that Wall Street is burning and were all choking on the smoke?

Rick nodded his head, pleased as ever that Gwen Anders was in charge. Im well aware of that, Gwen.

Good. Then youre also aware that Staunton and Blalocks client list is comprised of San Franciscos most elite investors, who are currently their most frantic and pissed-off investors. I had to throw a fit to get us this emergency meeting.

Tonight isnt good for me, Gwen. I have plans.

In silence, Gwen packed up her laptop and closed her portfolio, her hair hanging down across her face as she did so. She uncrossed her long legs, flipped her hair back, and stood. Rick stood with her.

Excuse me, Rick, she said matter-of-factly. But I was under the impression this foundation meant a great deal to you on a personal level. I assumed that you were dedicated to providing long-term care to as many underinsured and uninsured head injury patients as possible. I believed your mission was to help everyone who needed it.

It is, Rick said, his jaw tightening.

That mission takes money. The seven million we lost because of your preoccupation could have provided long-term care for a dozen patients, perhaps even giving back a life or two in the process.

Rick nodded, shoving his hands deep into his shorts pockets. Gwen, you know I have always appreciated your dedication to Meadowbrook.

Thank you.

However, I do not appreciate your attempt to manipulate me with guilt or any other emotion. It isnt working and never will.

One of her pale eyebrows shot high on her forehead. I would never attempt anything of the kind.

Good. Rick remained outwardly calm but inside he was fuming. Go tonight without me. Make the most prudent decisions possible. I am confident the foundation is in good hands.

Gwen beamed, as if their exchange had been tension-free. Thank you for your confidence, Rick. So, if I may ask, what plans do you have tonight that are so important?

He paused a second, wondering how to answer. On one hand, if Gwen knew he had a girlfriend, it might put an end to her fishing expeditions. On the other, knowing Rick had changed his policy on women could spur Gwen to double her efforts. It didnt matter, Rick knew. The truth was the truth. It was that simple.

Im getting takeout pizza with my girlfriend. Then were going to walk her dog around the neighborhood.

Gwen froze. It was as if her living flesh turned to solid ice before his eyes. She didnt flinch or breathe, but Rick knew what had to be flashing through her mindall those times hed turned down her invitations to chic picnics, black-tie fund-raisers, the opera, box seats at AT amp;T Park, quaint restaurants… the list had grown long in six years. In her stillness, Gwen was probably trying to grasp the fact that Rick had not only been disinterested in women as a matter of principle, but hed also been disinterested in her, specifically.

She blinked, the ice sculpture beginning to thaw. Did you say /girlfriend/? she asked.

He nodded.

Pizza?

Yes.

And a /dog/?

A Labradoodle.

Gwen put a hand to her throat, as if she were literally trying to stop a rise of bile.

I She laughed uncomfortably, shaking her head. But I thought… Im sorry, just a moment. She took a steadying breath and pasted on a cool smile. Is this a recent development?

It is.

Well, this comes as quite a shock, Rick. Ive always assumed… She stopped suddenly, tucking her portfolio under her arm. Ill send you a summary from the meeting, she said, her words clipped. If theres any recommendation you dont agree with, let me know immediately. We cant afford another day of fiscal hemorrhaging.

I will.

Good-bye, Rick.

With that, Gwen Anders strolled to Ricks office door, her hips and her straight yellow hair swaying as she moved. The instant her hand reached the doorknob, she looked over her shoulder. A set of pale blue eyes scanned Ricks face for a last-minute clarification, an explanation/something/.