Alice 1 (12 page)

“Where did you really get this?”

“You don’t believe it was a high school
hand-out?”

“No, I do not! Several sites haven’t been
published yet, and most haven’t even been researched.”

“Well, I guess my high school teacher was ahead
of his time.”

She laughed. “Yes, he certainly was. Perhaps
you’ll be a bit more forthcoming when we get to know each other
better. May I make a copy?”

“Sure, if you make copies for me of your
research papers, published and unpublished.”

“That is so strange, Alice. In all my years of
teaching, I’ve never had a student ask that. Makes me sad, as if
all those thousands of students were just sleep walking in and out
my door. But so much for the sadness of old teachers. If you don’t
have a class to go to, sure come along and I’ll see what I can
do.”

She spent an hour gathering reprints and making
copies of unpublished research. What a team we would make,
objective data and subjective experience. But I can’t share my very
special methodology, at least not directly.

I spent the evening going through Dr.
Barteau’s stuff. What a gold mine. Her research adds many sites the
Glacier Gang haven’t found, like auditory memories and hot flashes.
Only one bad mistake. I laughed when I tapped sneeze.

CHAPTER 28

Arlene is spending a lot of time with Barry. Odd
he never comes to the door to pick her up. When I asked when I
would meet him she seemed evasive. I saw him at a distance at the
dance but didn’t get a good look. She’s purring like a kitten but I
have a funny feeling.

Karla called and asked me to come in around
ten.

He offered coffee, but no chocolate donuts.

“Good to see you again, Alice. I have a little
job if you have time.”

“I always have time for you, Karla.” He’s kinda
old but looks in great shape.

“Thank you, Alice. I’ve grown very fond of you
as well, and that is not good in my business. There is a group on
campus called the Warriors. They have an open meeting at eight
tomorrow night to recruit new members. One of them, Jerry Wright,
was a member of a group of Holy Warriors in Golden, Colorado a few
years ago. We haven’t put many resources into the Golden group
because they never seemed to do much except rant about the sins of
the world and their own piety. I’ve put in a request for another
look.

“Here is Wright’s photograph. If you can make
the meeting I’m particularly interested if he or anyone in the
group is an active member of the Holies, and whether they have the
Gift.”

“Sure, glad to. Would you check out somebody for
me, Barry O’Sullivan. My landlady is going out with him and I have
a funny feeling. Never met him so maybe just scared Arlene will get
hurt again.”

He fired up his computer and quickly lost his
cheerful Jimmie Stewart smile. Not good.

A few minutes went by and the printer began to
print. “Barry O’Sullivan was or is a member of the same group of
Holies as Jerry Wright. Sorry Alice, they may be using Arlene to
get to you.”

“
Oh my God!
That is so awful!”

“A lot of unknowns here. Going to the meeting
will help clear up a few and there is a good chance Barry will be
there. Here’s Barry’s picture.” The printer ink was still wet, and
smudged my fingers.

“
God damn that mother fucking
bastard!!”

“Easy Alice, too many unknowns right now to do
anything except gather more information. If he’s the bastard he
seems to be, he’s all yours.”

“Fair enough. You want to get together day
after tomorrow at ten? I’ll tell you what I found and maybe you’ll
have an update on the Golden group.”

____________________

Went to the Bear’s Lair and half-way through
lunch Dennis came over. He’s pale and has lost a lot of the fire I
admire. Two heart squeezes do that I guess.

“Hello Alice. May I sit down?”

“Of course. Want part of an omelet?”

“No thanks. Alice, what really happened?”

“You saved my life by killing two Holy Warriors
of God, and then you and your friends killed the rest of the Holy
Warriors at Dr. Spengler’s”.

“I don’t think that’s what happened, but I ‘m
not sure. I’m so confused. The doctor said it will take a month or
more before I’m my old self again and the memories may never come
back. I’ve made peace with my father. What’s left of the Spenglers
have joined his group.”

“What made you leave?”

“I wanted independence and power. My father
wanted wisdom and light.”

“I thought your father was carrying on the
Crowley tradition, and old Crowley for sure was after power.”

“Yes, but in his final days Aleister renounced
darkness and chose the light. The beautiful sounds of Heaven rocked
the house when he died. At least that’s the legend. My father also
chose the light. He is following Aleister’s last and greatest
insight. ‘The emotional threads of joy and delight bind the
universe as one.’ William Blake sang the same beautiful song.”

Oh my yes, I’ve heard that wonderful escape from
reality many, many times. Always from sentimental fools who eat
well and live in safe neighborhoods. All the horrors of the world
are kept far, far away by the army, the police, and the Zoning
Commission. And I have seen the shock when raw Reality hits those
super-nice people as old age brings the slow death of mind and
body. The Zoning Commission can only do so much.

That is so dark. I don’t like myself when I get
in this mood, but it won’t last and I’ll soon be singing Blake’s
lovely songs again. Knowing Arlene will be hurt has grossed me out
and my meddling in her life was the cause. Of course my intentions
were of the very finest. Oh yes.

____________________

Dr. Barteau and I are having longer and
longer conversations after class, sometimes about neuropsychology,
sometimes about life and love, and sometimes how to cook a
raspberry omelet. Guess I’m still looking out the window for
mommy.

CHAPTER 29

I have a hard time at breakfast looking at
Arlene’s glowing face, knowing the only reason Barry has been
paying attention to her is to get to me.
Oh my god!
I just
thought of another reason for that glow. I thought sex before
marriage was a sin. I guess Hell’s infernal can’t compete with
testosterone’s raging heat. Karla said to wait until we get more
information. That “more information” better be good.

____________________

Jerry Wright’s home is a little cottage set back
from the street, partially hidden by a high hedge.

Why do guys have no sense of order and beauty
where they live? At least it’s reasonably clean. Jerry probably
spent the whole day wiping up the mess he made since the last
meeting. Guys are such lovable pigs.

Jerry is open, friendly, and has a warm smile. A
super actor? I told him my name was Maria Stockton and he led to a
room in the back. There’s a large crucifix on the wall and
Christian pictures and symbols scattered around. I was early and
there were only four people in the room, and Barry was one of them.
He looked up and smiled when I walked over and like Jerry he
doesn’t fit the Holies I have known.

“Hi, my name is Maria.”

“Hi, I’m Barry.”

I watched carefully and saw no sign of
recognition. If he were a spy for the Holies he would have been
given my picture.

“This is my first time here, are you new?”

“Oh no. Jerry and I are old friends and when we
came to Berkeley decided to start a group like we had in
Colorado.”

“What kind of group was that?”

“Well, we called ourselves the Holy Warriors of
God, but I never liked the name, too pretentious. I’m not all that
humble, but I don’t set myself that high.”

“Yeah that does sound a little way up there,
humility being one of the virtues and all. What did the group
do?”

“It was pretty activist. We picketed a place
that kills babies and wrote letters to politicians supporting the
sanctity of the marriage between a man and a woman. Things like
that.”

Either this guy is really good, or Karla and I
have nothing to worry about. But it can’t be this easy. Why did he
choose Arlene at the Unitarian dance? And would a devout Christian
go near a Unitarian Fellowship?

“So the Holy Warriors of God just wrote letters
and picketed. That’s it?” Said with just a tiny hint of scorn.
Let’s see if he takes the bait.

“Well, one time we burned a bunch of pamphlets
advertising an abortion clinic, and another time we threw rotten
tomatoes at a meeting of atheists. I guess maybe we should have
done more, but mostly we just tried to be decent people.”

“That sounds good enough for me. Did you ever
hear of a girl called Alice? Alice Shannon?”

“No. Who is she?” Nothing. No sign of
recognition.

“A friend who I thought came here. Do you have a
hard time finding nice people to go out with?”

“Yes it’s hard, not many good Christians here.
Well, you don’t have to be a Christian to be good. I have a friend
who is just a nice, nice person. She was raised Christian but
doesn’t go to church anymore.”

“Have you been going together long?”

“No, not long. We met at a dance and really like
each other.”

“I’m so glad, Barry,” and you don’t know how
close you came to Hell on earth. I detect no dishonesty. So the spy
scenario was nothing but coincidence and paranoia? Or is there
another doll ready to poop in my face?

“Welcome to all,” Jerry began. “I see some new
people and some old. Welcome to all. We are a small group who try
to live good lives in a world of sin and corruption. We are not
saints. We are human as Christ was human, doing our best to lead
decent lives in the midst of the seductive temptations of the
world. We attempt to bring a small portion of the love and truth of
our Lord Jesus Christ into the world through prayer and ritual.
Sometimes we succeed, sometimes we fail, but we always try our
best.”

He began an evocation using a small cross on a
table. At the high point of the ritual the cross rose a couple
inches. I could sense it took an effort, and it quickly dropped
back. Then there were prayers, an old Negro spiritual, and the
meeting was over. I thanked Jerry for the wonderful experience and
asked how he raised the crucifix.

“It was not me. The glory of our Lord Jesus
Christ was here, answering our prayers.”

He really thinks the Lord came down and has no
idea he or someone else in the room did it. Like all humans, he
used the belief system available to understand what happened.

And yes, you smart trouble makers are
correct.

I have done the same.

How do I know the Lord Jesus didn’t come
down?

Just before I left I folded two McKinleys and
zipped them under the cross on the table to show how generous the
Lord can be when pleased with the devotion of his followers.

CHAPTER 30

Such a relief watching Arlene move about the
kitchen. It’s her turn to make breakfast.

“Are you pregnant?”

“Yes!” Such a beatific smile.

“Does Barry know?”

“No. I don’t know how to tell him.”

“How about, ‘Barry, I’m going to have your
kid?’” She laughed.

“Yes, I should do that but I’m scared he won’t
want the baby and won’t want me. What if he says I have to get an
abortion?”

“He’s pro-life! If he goes hypocrite, shoot the
bastard.” Glad to see her laugh. I’ve dropped the poor little waif
routine with Arlene and we’re woman to woman now.

“You’re right, Alice, and the sooner the better.
I’ll tell him tonight, but I’m scared.”

“I’ll be here, whatever happens,” and gave
her a big hug.

____________________

Dr. Barteau has offered me a job as her lab
assistant this summer, a job usually reserved for graduate
students. I once asked why she never married but she became so sad
I never asked again. I’ve become the daughter she never had and
she’s become my second mother. That kind of relationship can end
badly, but we have a lot more going for us than emotional hooks
from the past.

She knows I know more than I let on about the
behavioral concomitants of neurological activity, but respects my
reluctance to share. I on occasion, oh so subtly, guide her toward
fruitful research. She’s not fooled.

____________________

Karla handed me the usual mug of coffee as we
sat down at the table in the back room.

“Barry and Jerry try to live up to the ideals of
Christianity. Their Shadow ability is minimal and they assume the
power is coming from the Lord.”

“Pure coincidence Barry picked Arlene at the
dance? And even stranger, he went to a dance at a Unitarian
Fellowship?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Maybe I want to believe
that so Arlene won’t get hurt. No! I’m a very good lie detector and
those two guys are what they seem. What did you find out about the
Golden group?”

“They disbanded a few years ago. They were never
heavy Holies, just a few minor incidents.”

“What do you think?”

“Let’s go with coincidence, for now.”

“I have a few questions about the Holy Warriors
of God. How many groups are there in the US and is there a group
leading the rest?”

“There are nine groups we know of with a loose
leadership from a group in Walton, NY. That’s a small village on
the west side of the Catskills. The Plattsburgh group has been
trying to take over the leadership from the Walton group, so the
Waltons are probably not too unhappy their rivals have dropped out
of sight. But when they learn they’ve all been killed, they might
feel honor bound to seek revenge, or at least find out what
happened to protect themselves. They are under fairly regular
surveillance so we’ll know if they plan to come to Berkeley.”

“How good are they?”