Alien in My Pocket (6 page)

16

Missing in Action

I
sat alone at our kitchen table and stared at the blue ribbon.

First place.

I wasn't sure how to feel.

But I did know I didn't feel the way I should feel. Instead of proud, I felt uncomfortable. Uneasy. Worried. Nervous. I wasn't sure why.

It wasn't just beating Taylor, who had gotten the red second-place ribbon. It was something else. Of course, I wasn't sure how you're supposed to feel when an alien helps you win first place in your school's science fair. It had never happened to anyone in the history of mankind, so I was in all-new territory.

“Zack, I'll be ready to go in five minutes,” Dad called from down the hallway. He was answering emails before he took me to the Tri-County Science Fair Finals at our town's community center. The first-place winners from all twenty-nine elementary schools in three counties would be there.

Certainly I wouldn't win that. Or would I?

Just as I was beginning to accept the fact that I was my town's new science genius, I heard Amp's voice from under the kitchen table.

“It's over! It's truly over!” he screamed.

“Amp? What's wrong?” I said, sliding down under the table. “What's over?”

“We've got a major disaster on our hands,” he said breathlessly.

“What?” I said. “We're almost out of the woods here. Stop worrying. Cheer up.”

“What on earth are you talking about?” he shouted.

“What are
you
talking about?” I shouted back.

“What?” my dad called out from down the hall.

“Oh, nothing!” I called back. “Just talking to myself!”

“My spaceship has been stolen,” Amp growled at me.

I laughed with relief. “Oh, Amp, it's not stolen, you goof. I moved it to my baseball bag—”

“I LOOKED IN THERE!” he whisper-screamed, grabbing me by the nose and yanking me down to his eye-level. “IT'S GONE!” he thundered in his squeaky voice.

I ran upstairs. The bag I kept my baseball equipment in was indeed unzipped and empty. I frantically turned over every square inch of my room. Amp's spaceship was gone.

“Now I can never leave this floofy planet,” Amp whispered, staring out my window into the darkening sky.

“Zack, Olivia is on the phone!” Dad hollered from the bottom of the stairs. “She says she needs to talk to you urgently.”

Amp and I stared at each other. “Maybe Olivia has it?” I gulped.

“I'll get it in your room!” I hollered back. I picked up Amp and ran down the hall to my parents' room. I sat on the bed and picked up the phone on my mom's nightstand. “HANG UP, DAD, I'VE GOT IT!” I yelled.

I could hear a lot of rustling sounds on the other side of the phone. Then I heard the phone downstairs click loudly as it was hung up.

“Olivia?” I said, but she didn't say anything. “Tell me you have Amp's ship. Do you have it? Hello? Olivia, can you hear me?”

“Zack, I'm here at the Tri-County Finals with my grandpa,” she said. “I'm using my grandpa's cell phone.”

My mind raced. I was sure her grandpa was listening, so Olivia was trying to be extra careful about what she said.

“Is he listening to you?”

“Yes, it's really fun here.”

This told me he was listening. “Olivia, did you take Amp's spaceship? It's not here. We won't be mad if you took it, we just need to know.”

She didn't speak for a few seconds. “Zack, I just thought you and your friend would want to know that Taylor got a ride here from a friend. He borrowed your silver football. I saw him with it, but I lost him in the crowd. It's here and I don't know what he's doing with it. I can't find him. You should come, quick.” The phone went dead.

Amp, who had been listening next to me, just stared at me, his whole face trembling.

“DAD,” I yelled. “WE HAVE TO LEAVE RIGHT NOW!”

17

Panic Attack

T
he community center was a zoo.

There were little kids running everywhere. Camera crews from the local news stations were filming with shockingly bright lights. Photographers from the paper popped their flashes. The air was filled with a steady roar of parents bragging about how smart their kids were.

Olivia had met me at the curb, where my dad dropped me before driving off to find a parking space. We raced inside and I walked right into the chaos.

“We've got to find Taylor immediately,” I said to Olivia, scanning my eyes over the noisy crowd moving through row after row of impressive-looking experiments.

I noticed that the kids demonstrating their science projects were dressed up. The girls wore sharp, bright dresses. Many of the boys wore little V-neck sweaters with matching clip-on ties. I looked down at my muddy sneakers, jeans, and old hoodie sweatshirt.

“You look like a science genius who's down on his luck,” Olivia said.

“I couldn't find my tie,” I said with a shrug.

“Did you bring Amp?” Olivia asked.

“He's in my pocket,” I said. “He has this invisibility trick, but he explained in the car it doesn't work on this many brains at once.”

“I have no idea what that even means,” she said.

“ZACK MCGEE!”

It was Mrs. Bird. She looked upset. She grabbed me by the arm with her bony fingers. “They're waiting, let's go! If you're not there in less than a minute, you'll be disqualified!”

“Yeah, about that,” I said. “I'm kind of busy right now.”

With that, she took me by the ear and began pulling me away—which I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to do even if you are the school nurse. But no one seemed to want to intervene.

“Find Taylor!” I called back to Olivia. “I'll meet you in a minute.”

Thankfully, as Mrs. Bird shoved me in front of the waiting judges, I noticed my project had been set up for me, fully intact and bolted to a desk that was bolted to the floor. Amp's precious gizmo remained in its place near the third button.

To be honest, I can't even remember what I said to the panel of judges waiting for me at my science project. Mr. Prentiss was one of the judges, but there were now four other judges I did not recognize. Some of them asked me questions. I wasn't sure if Amp was sending me information from my pocket with his alien hocus-pocus, but I was impressed with my answers even as I said them.

The magnet worked as it had earlier in the day, pulling the tacks from my display and sending papers fluttering everywhere. That had a big impact. The judges lost a pen, a necklace, and an oversized State of Texas belt buckle to my magnet.

There was lots of nodding and soaring eyebrows, so I know it went pretty well, even if I couldn't tell you a single thing they said.

As the judges walked off to the next experiment, I also started to run off, but first I spotted Max Myers in the crowd. He had watched my demonstration. “Max! Max!” I called, waving him over. “Could you do me a favor? Could you keep an eye on my experiment for a minute? If anyone touches it or starts pushing those buttons, head-butt them.”

“Uh, okay. But I don't think my mom will like me head-butting anybody,” he said with a troubled look on his face. Then he softened. “Don't worry, McGee. I'll stand guard for you. We're teammates now, right?”

“Teammates?”

“Didn't you see? They posted the cuts online. You're on my baseball team now. We're both Badgers, buddy.”

“Whoa,” I said. “I didn't know that. Thanks!”

With that, I ran off, feeling bad about not being able to feel good about making the travel baseball team.

Navigating the science fair was like running through a field of corn. I couldn't see anything over the heads of all the adults, and I certainly saw no sign of Olivia or Taylor. I ran past my mom once and she said, “Jeepers, Zack!” as I ran by.

“What's taking so long?” Amp shouted through my pocket.

“I'm trying!” I yelped. “I can't find Taylor anywhere.”

Just as I was about to exit through a side door to see if I could find anybody outside, somebody yanked on the hood of my sweatshirt and spun me around.

Olivia.

“Look!” she said, pointing to the left of the stage at the end of the room. There I saw Taylor wearing a swollen green backpack. He was opening a door that led to the backstage area. He was being followed by a puzzled and slightly annoyed looking Mr. Prentiss. Taylor waved him into the doorway. “He's going to show the spaceship to that judge guy with the fancy suit!” Olivia exclaimed.

“GET MY SHIP!” Amp roared in my head.

And with that, Olivia and I tore off to rescue the spaceship with no plan other than an ace in the hole—or at least an alien in the pocket.

18

Showdown

“H
and it over, thief!” I demanded when I threw the stage door open.

“What is this thing?” Taylor said, lifting Amp's gleaming spaceship out of the backpack. He held it up for Mr. Prentiss to see.

“My little brother stole that from my room,” I told Mr. Prentiss, who seemed at a complete loss for what to do.

We were all cramped together in a tiny space at the bottom of some dark stairs that led backstage. Taylor was close enough to try tackling him, but I didn't want to accidentally damage Amp's ship.

“Zack's been hiding this in his room, and it's no hamster cage,” Taylor said, lifting the spaceship like he was going to throw it down. “Just look at this thing, Mr. Prentiss! You might be able to figure out what it is.”

So that was his plan: he wanted to see if Mr. Prentiss could identify it.

“Take it easy with that, Taylor,” Olivia warned.

“Hey, I don't want to get mixed up with any family squabbles,” Mr. Prentiss said uncomfortably. “I'm needed onstage. I don't have time for—”

“You stole it, Taylor,” I yelled, my voice cracking with emotion.

Taylor tried to ignore us. He stepped toward Mr. Prentiss. “Feel how light it is. It's not even metal. I don't know what it's made out of. Just hold it!”

Mr. Prentiss reached out for it, seemingly mesmerized by curiosity.

“Oh, forget this,” I heard Amp say inside my head.

Suddenly, Mr. Prentiss straightened up like he'd just stepped in something. His eyes grew wide and then he started to gag. “I smell . . . horse poop.”

“What?” Olivia said, stunned.

“Amp,” I groaned. He was using his Erdian mind trick to cause Mr. Prentiss to experience the scent of poop.

“It's terrible!” Mr. Prentiss cried, quickly looking at the bottoms of his expensive shoes.

“Horse poop?” Taylor exclaimed. “I don't smell anything.”

I could hear announcements outside in the main hall. The crowd cheered and clapped.

Amp was trying to force Mr. Prentiss out of this tiny space. Amp could make a person think of practically anything for a short period of time. And the sense of smell, Amp once told me, was the easiest to mess with.

“Oh, it's terrible,” Mr. Prentiss said, swatting at the air in front of him. “And now it's mixed with cafeteria food,” he gagged. “It's like it was just burrito day in here.”

Taylor screwed up his face and stared at the spaceship. “Poop? Burritos? Maybe this thing makes you crazy!”

“I have to get out of here,” Mr. Prentiss cried. He turned and crashed through the door, letting in another round of cheering from the crowd. The door swung closed, leaving us in the dim light again.

“Agh, I thought he'd never leave,” Amp said, emerging from my pocket and climbing up the sleeve of my sweatshirt.

“WHAT IS THAT?!?” Taylor croaked. He let go of the spaceship and it dropped toward the floor. Olivia was fast enough to snatch it out of the air just before it hit the ground.

“Amp,” I stammered. “You didn't make yourself invisible!”

“Oh, right, I forgot,” he said casually, looking over at Taylor. “Hey, I can't think straight in that pocket. Not enough air, I guess.”

“Your doll . . . it's alive,” Taylor said in a soft, quivering voice.

“Now look at what you've done,” I said to Amp, plucking him off my shoulder. “Now my brother knows about you, and he's impossible to shut up.”

The crowd outside erupted in laughter, then cheered and clapped again.

Olivia stuffed the spaceship back in the backpack. “We need to get out of here.”

The crowd cheered again, as if they were responding to each of the things we said.

“I'll have to erase some of his short-term memory,” Amp said, looking at me.

I stared at him for a second and then said, “Fine! Just do it quickly.”

“Wait! What?” Taylor said, panicked.

Amp stared at Taylor and squinted.

A second later, Taylor got a blank look on his face. He blinked. His body relaxed. The fear melted away. “Where am I?” he asked, looking around. “Oh my gosh, what is that—that creature you're holding?!” he asked, clearly horrified.

“AMP, YOU DID IT AGAIN! YOU FORGOT TO MAKE YOURSELF INVISIBLE!”

Olivia moaned. “You guys are killing me.”

“Oh dear, that was my mistake,” Amp said. “Totally my fault.”

“Well, it certainly wasn't
my
fault,” I snapped.

“That doll is alive!” Taylor gasped again, stepping back toward the stairs.

As if on cue, the crowd erupted with laughter outside the door.

“Hold on, Taylor, he'll erase your memory again in a second.”

And for the second time in two minutes, Amp erased Taylor's short-term memory, but this time Amp remembered to make himself invisible to Taylor.

“Where am I?” Taylor asked, looking around again. “Why is Olivia wearing my backpack?”

Olivia pulled Taylor up gently by the shoulder. “C'mon, let's go, Taylor.”

I slipped Amp back in my pocket and followed Olivia and Taylor out the door.

Four hundred eyeballs zeroed in on my entrance and I froze.

“OH, THERE HE IS! THERE'S OUR THIRD FINALIST! AND JUST IN TIME! LET'S HEAR IT FOR ZACK MCGEE, EVERYBODY!”

The crowd in front of me erupted in applause, hoots, and whistles.

And I thought this night couldn't get any weirder. Boy, was I wrong.