All for This (33 page)

I shrug. “I’ve got Claire. Right now, she’s the love of my life.”

She throws her hand over her mouth and her eyes fill with tears. “I’m so glad she has you,” she manages, tears rolling onto her cheeks, “since her mom is so screwed up.”

She pushes off the couch and grabs her purse off the kitchen table. I follow her to the door, but when I open it, she faces me again. “I am so sorry for being the reason things didn’t work out with Hanna. So sorry. If I could go back…”

I take her hand and squeeze her fingers. “If we hadn’t already been off-balance, anything you did or said wouldn’t have mattered. It took seeing her with Nate to understand that. They’re steady. Despite…everything. When the world throws them for a loop, they’re fine as soon as they get their feet on the ground.”

She nods and looks to the door of Claire’s bedroom. “Tell her every day how much I love her. Tell her I’m coming back for her. I don’t want her to feel…” She presses her fingers to her lips. “Stupid antidepressant clearly isn’t working,” she says, half smiling as more tears roll down her cheeks.

“I think they’re working just fine. And you don’t need to worry. I’ll tell her. Every day.”

“T
HIS IS
the cutest nursery ever,” Liz says. She’s adorable with her blond curls pulled into a high ponytail, smudges of red paint on her cheek.

I can’t disagree. I love everything about the nursery. The walls are a pale yellow with a bold, red accent wall. We used primary colors and found gender-neutral bed sets with colorful zoo animals.

“You think it’ll be two girls or two boys or a boy and a girl?”

I shrug.

“I know, I know! We just want them to be healthy, but part of me is hoping it’ll be two little girls.” She slings her arm over my shoulder and eyes my belly. “Or not so little,” she teases. “I’m surprised I got to come over tonight, honestly. Nate hasn’t taken his hands off you since the doctor told him it was safe to have sex.”

I bite back a grin then sigh. Having Nate in my house the last four months has been amazing. Vivian and Drake bought a house in a ritzy little area outside of Indianapolis, not a bad drive from New Hope, and Collin stays with us during the week and stays with them on the weekends.

Everything was going so well that they took me off complete bed rest by thirty weeks, but only last week, when I hit the thirty-seven-week mark, were we released to have sex again. If I was worried about my enormous belly standing between me and Nate being intimate, I needn’t have. He’s plenty creative when it counts.

The thought sends a buzz of anticipation through me. I shift uncomfortably and move away from Liz to sit in the glider rocker Nate bought for the nursery. So many thoughtful touches for a man who never wanted more children. Or who told himself that he didn’t want any more children. My heart pinches a bit at the thought. Nate’s an amazing father, and I’ve never seen a man so excited about his unborn children.

“I need to—” I stop, eyes wide as I try to figure out what’s happening. “Liz?”

“What, sweetie?”

“Either I’m peeing myself and I can’t stop or my water just broke.” A steady trickle of warmth runs down my leg.

She squeals and then claps. “Hospital. Come on. Let’s go.”

“We have plenty of time,” I assure her. “Let’s go across the street and get Nate.”

“Are you sure? Should you be walking? Shouldn’t I call your doctor?” She grabs her phone from her pocket. “I’ll call Nate and then the doctor and then—”

“Liz.” I put my hand on her arm. “It’s going to be okay.”

Biting her bottom lip, she wraps her arms around my enormous stomach and sighs. “I get to meet you two soon! You’ll know me right away. I’m the cool one.”

We grab my overnight bag and diaper bag and are halfway to the door when Nate and Asher walk in. Nate takes one look at me and the bag slung over Lizzy’s shoulder and says, “Yeah?”

I nod, and before I can say anything, he pulls me into his arms, slides his hands into my hair, and kisses me.

“Knock it off!” Liz says. “You can suck face later. Now it’s time to have some babies!”

Three Weeks Later

“H
EY,
C
RANE!”
Asher calls, waving me over. “Is it done?”

I find a seat in the chair next to his and hand him the finished version of the song we’ve been hammering away at since August. Hanna’s song.

“What about that?” I ask, pointing to a new line in the chorus.

“Yeah.” He nods as he studies it. Then he grins. “Yeah, that could work.”

I’ve written a lot of songs in my life and co-written even more, but none of them fought me as much as this one. Or maybe I’m the one who fought it. I wanted it to be about how sometimes loving someone means letting them go, and it didn’t work. Months later, it’s turned into a piece about how love is worth all the pain and heartbreak that comes before and after.

I knew, if I touched you, it’d be more than a kiss.

I need you. I’ll feed you. I’ll be your dying bliss.

Staring at the chorus, I sense her. I lift my head, and Hanna’s smiling at me, my daughter in her arms. Next to her, Liz cradles my other daughter, gazing into her little face like a woman lost in love.

My daughters, Sophia and Josephine, are three weeks old today, and the family is over to welcome them home and celebrate their healthy births. I’m exhausted and sleep deprived and generally the luckiest bastard in the world.

“Are you two going to sing for us or not?” Maggie asks.

Asher winks at her. “Sure. We’ve even got something new.” He strums the first chords of the song, and Hanna’s eyes go wide. She’s heard me working on it and begged me to sing it for her, but I told her she had to wait until it was done. I guess it’s showtime.

You met me in the darkness and invited me to see

The path into the daylight wasn’t what I thought it’d be.

I wanted to slay dragons for you but didn’t understand

The dragons needing slaying were the ones inside my head.

I knew, if I touched you, it’d be more than a kiss.

I need you. I’ll feed you. I’ll be your dying bliss.

I’ll be your superhero. I’d do it all for this.

The words aren’t just perfect for the song. They’re true. And when I look up from my guitar, I know she understands that every word is for her. She turns to Krystal and hands her the baby. Then she comes across the room and takes my hand.

“Are you ready to make good on your promise, angel?” I ask softly.

“What promise is that?”

I produce a ring from my pocket. It’s an emerald-cut diamond framed by our daughters’ birthstone. “Marry me. Be my wife and my family. Wear my ring.”

She grins, and happy tears spill down her cheeks. “I was starting to wonder when you’d ask me.”

Thank you for reading the final book in the Here and Now series. Curious about Lizzy and Sam? Their story is next and begins with
Something Reckless
, releasing in December 2014, and will conclude with
Something Real,
coming in 2015. If you’d like to receive an email when it and my other new titles are available, please sign up for my
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