All In (The Blackstone Affair, Part 2) (8 page)

“Put your hands up over your head and hold
on to the bed.”

Her eyes flickered a bit and focused on my
mouth.

“Trust me. I’m gonna make it so good for
you, baby. Let me do this my way…”

“Ethan,” she whispered, but she did what I
asked, slowly bringing her arms up to cross wrists over her head
and gripped the edge of the mattress. God, I loved when she said my
name during sex. I loved when she said it, period.

“Baby.” Her breasts puddled to the sides and
up a little with the rise of her arms. Those perfect raspberry
tipped nipples begged for more of my tongue. I went back to them,
sucking and tweaking the sensitive flesh, loving how she moved
beneath my mouth. She flowed in a rhythm with me.

I dragged my lips off her. My fingers
reached out for a nipple and rolled it around before pulling the
tip up in a little pinch. She moaned and arched for me but kept her
arms up. I pinched the other one and watched her flex her hips a
little, her legs widening and displaying even more of that part of
her I needed to know again.

“You’re so beautiful like this,” I said
against her stomach as I kissed my way down to the place I needed
to have my mouth against. I kissed first and loved her response.
She trembled beneath my touch. I flicked my tongue over her folds,
pressing her open like a blossom.
Mine
. She flexed her
muscles and whimpered. Small soft sounds of pleasure and need. Need
for what I could give to her. Need for
me
.

“You are…so fucking beautiful, Brynne,” I
murmured against her flesh.

“You make me feel beautiful,” she stuttered
in a whisper and opened up a little more underneath me.

“That’s it…give yourself over to
me,
baby.” I kissed her pussy lips just like I would her mouth. “I’m
going to make you come so hard, and you’re going to think of
nothing but me when I do,” I told her.

“Please make me…”

I growled against her flesh. “Making you
come under my tongue is the sexiest thing in the world. How you
move. How you taste. How you sound when you get there...”

“Ahhh…” she moaned and moved beneath me.
Such a gorgeous sound
. I went to work on her in earnest as
she cried out, arching her hips to meet my mouth. I held her open
and devoured the quivering softness. I couldn’t stop and I couldn’t
slow down. Her quim up against my lips, where my tongue could find
its way inside her over and over again, was all I cared about. I
kept it up, sweeping over her clit until I felt her go off.

“Oh, God, Ethan!” she cried softly,
convulsing as her climax took over.

“Uh huh,” I groaned, barely able to speak.
“Now, you’re going to do that again!” I told her as I moved up and
aligned my cock. I flinched when our parts touched, like a jolt of
electricity charging me. Our eyes met and hers widened in that
instant before I took her.

I buried my cock on a hard slick thrust,
unable to deny myself for another second. She moaned the sexiest
sound I’ve ever heard when I sank down into her. Fuck, she felt
good—tight and hot and swallowing me in, her inner muscles
clenching around me through the force of her ongoing climax. It was
something so fine it frightened me to understand the power she held
over me. Brynne held me captive as she had done from the first. Sex
was no different. She held me captive all of the time.

She moved with me, accepting every stroke
like she needed it from me to live.

“I’m going to fuck you until you come
again!”

And I did.

Brynne took it all; every pounding drive of
my cock into her sweet cove, the sound of our bodies slapping
together filling the air, bringing us closer to the end. I loomed
over her face with mine, gripping her eyes with mine, owning her
body with mine. I saw only her. I felt only her. I heard only
her.

She tensed deep inside and rolled her eyes
back, her mouth falling open. I took that too. I covered her lips
with mine and thrust inside with my tongue. I swallowed her cries
when she started to orgasm and gave her mine when the rush hit me
in the balls. This was going to be immense—a blast of something
indescribable, pleasure that belied words to express what it felt
like, shot up my cock. I could only get lost in her and ride it out
as I fell into oblivion with the explosion.

My body slowed to a stop and just stayed
buried inside her, still convulsing through the pulses. I didn’t
want to ever leave where I was. How could I?

Time stilled and we breathed. The simplest
task of taking in oxygen was all consuming. I could feel her heart
pounding beneath my chest and the little spasms of pleasure being
drawn out to the last around my cock from the tight walls of her
quim.
So fucking good
.

When I could bear to pull my mouth away from
her skin, I hovered over her face, searching her eyes for something
good. I was afraid for what I might see. The last time we’d been
like this together, very bad things happened in the next moments.
She told you to get off her and walked out the door
.

“I do love you.” I whispered the words
barely audible just inches away from her face and watched her eyes
grow luminous and then wet. She started to cry.

Not really the reaction I’d hoped for. I
pulled out of her body and felt the gush of wet between us. But
Brynne surprised me yet again. Instead of distancing herself, she
burrowed right up against my chest, held on to me and sobbed
quietly. She wept but wasn’t trying to get away from me. She was
seeking comfort. I realized I would never understand a woman’s
mind.

“Tell me everything will be okay…even if it
won’t…” she said between sobs.

“It will be, baby. I’ll make sure.” I wanted
a Djarum so bad I could taste it. Instead I held her against me and
stroked over her hair, twining my fingers through its silkiness
over and over again until she stopped crying.

“Why?” she asked after a while.

“Why what?” I kissed her forehead.

“Why do you love me?” Her voice was low but
the question very clearly heard.

“I can’t change how I feel or know
why
, Brynne. I just know you’re my girl and I’ve had to
follow my heart.” She still couldn’t tell me the same. I knew she
cared for me but I think she was more convinced that she was
undeserving of love more than anything. Either giving or
receiving.

“I haven’t told you the rest of the story
yet, Ethan.”

Bingo
. “What are you afraid of?” She
stiffened in my arms. “Tell me what frightens you, baby.”

“That you’ll stop.”

“Stop loving you? No. I won’t.”

“But when you know everything? I’m a mess,
Ethan.” She looked up at me with her eyes sparking different colors
again.

“Hmmm.” I kissed the end of her nose. “I
know enough already and it changes nothing about how I feel. You
can’t be any worse than me. I command you to stop worrying. And
you’re right. You are a mess down here, and I made you that way.” I
snaked my hand down between her legs and slid my fingers all along
the center of her and felt what I’d put there. The caveman in me
loved the idea of all that cum I’d put inside her, but she probably
didn’t. “Take a bath with me and we can talk some more.”

Her eyes widened from my touch but she
nodded her head and said, “That sounds nice.”

I rolled off the bed and went in to start
the bath water. Her eyes tracked me, looking over my back. I knew
she was staring at the scars. I knew she’d ask me about them soon
too. And I would have to share my fucked up train wreck of a past.
I didn’t want to. The thought of bringing her into that cluster
fuck went against every instinct I possessed, but still, I wouldn’t
ever keep the truth from her again. That wasn’t an option with
Brynne and I’d learned my lesson.

I poured in some bath bubbles and adjusted
the temperature. I looked up at the sight of her walking into the
bathroom. Naked and beautiful and coming toward me, she took my
breath away even if she’d gotten too slim. I found myself thinking
about another round of prehistoric shagging but forced it down so
the rational part of my brain could function. We really needed to
talk through some things and sex had a way of pushing to the front
of the queue and overshadowing everything else.
The greedy
bastard
.

So I took her hand instead and helped her
step into the tub with me and got us settled. I sat in the back and
put her in front of me, her slippery bum resting temptingly against
my suddenly reawakening cock. I told my tackle to shut the hell up,
and to imagine Muriel the street vendor and her accompanying
mustache if he wanted more of Brynne’s divine fanny. That did the
trick. Muriel was hideous, and probably not even a real woman.
Maybe not even human. In fact, I’m sure Muriel is really an alien
scout sent here to sell newspapers and learn the language. I still
craved my Djarums. Piles of them.

Brynne sniffed the air. “Do you smoke in
here?”

“Sometimes.”
I really need to stop doing
that
. “But I’ll have to stop it inside the house now that
you’re here with me.”

“I don’t mind it, Ethan. The smell of the
spice and the cloves is nice and it doesn’t bother me, but I know
it’s bad for you and I don’t like that part.”

“I’m trying to quit.” I slid my hands up her
arm and then down over a breast resting just at water level. “With
you here I’ll do better. You can be my motivation, okay?”

She took a deep breath and nodded. Then she
started talking.

“I never went back to my high school again.
Only six months from graduation and I quit. My parents were in
shock at the change in me. It didn’t take long for them to find out
about the video either. They argued about what to do, and had very
differing opinions. I didn’t care. I was someplace else in my head
and very, very sick. It’s hard to admit about myself, but it’s the
truth. I was destroyed emotionally with no way to escape the
demons.”

I kissed the back of her head and held on to
her a little tighter. I knew all about demons, the evil cocksuckers
that they were. “Can I ask why your parents didn’t try to press
assault charges on the three of them? I can’t imagine it would have
been difficult to get an arrest. You were underage and they were
adults…and there was videotaped evidence.”

“My dad wanted them in prison. My mom didn’t
want the publicity. She asserted that my slutty reputation would
only drag our name through the mud and upset the social order of
things. She was probably right. But again, I didn’t care what
anyone did about it. I was lost in my head.”

“Oh, baby…”

“And then I discovered they’d gotten me
pregnant.”

I stilled at that unwelcome news.
Fucking
hell
…

“It put me over the edge. I—I couldn’t deal
with any of it. My dad didn’t know what to do about a pregnancy. He
started talking to the senator. My mom scheduled an abortion for me
and I simply could not handle any more. I didn’t want a baby. I
didn’t want to kill what was inside of me either. I just didn’t
want to be reminded of the incident and everything and everybody
reminded me. I guess if I’d felt better about myself I could have
figured things out, but then if I’d felt better about myself I
would have never gone to that party in the first place and ended up
on that pool table.”

“I am so sorry...” I spoke softly but firm,
wanting her to really understand how I truly felt. “Listen, baby,
you cannot blame yourself for what happened to you.” I pressed in
close to her ear. “You were the victim of a crime and treated
abominably. It was not your fault, Brynne. I hope you know that
now.” I rubbed up and down her arms, drawing the warm water up over
her skin.

She settled more into my body and took a
deep breath. “I think I do now, for the most part at least. Dr.
Roswell helped me, and finding my place in the world helped too.
But back then I was done. Done with living. I couldn’t see another
path for me.”

All the warmth of earlier left me and I
braced for what was coming. Like a train wreck you can’t stop
staring at, I had to know what had happened to her but also didn’t
want to know. I didn’t want to go to her dark place with her.

She shifted in the bath and twirled her
fingers in the water as she started speaking again. “I’d never felt
so calm as I did on that day. I got up and knew what I would do. I
waited until Daddy went to work. I felt bad for doing it at his
house but knew that my mom would never forgive me for doing it at
hers. I wrote them goodbye letters and set them out on my bed. Then
I took a handful of sleeping pills I’d stolen from my mom’s stash,
got in the bathtub, and cut my wrist open.”

“No.” My heart compressed in a painful grip
and all I could do was hold on to her, feel her warm body, and be
grateful she was with me now. Imagining her at the point of taking
her life, at such a young age, and feeling she had no other options
was very sobering. I knew how I felt about Brynne but this scared
the shit out of me.

“But I sucked at that too. I got sleepy and
didn’t really cut deep enough to bleed out, or so I was told later.
The pills I took were the far worse danger. Daddy found me in time.
He came home for lunch to check on me. He said a weird vibe was
shadowing him the whole morning and he just came home. He saved
me.” Brynne shuddered slightly and turned her head a little more to
rest her cheek on my chest.

Thank you, Tom Bennett
. “I’m so glad
you sucked at it,” I whispered. “My girl can’t be brill at
everything.” I tried to lighten the mood a little but this was not
a conversation for steering. My role was to listen, so I kissed her
hair again and put my hand over her heart. “When I speak to your
father I’m going to thank him,” I whispered.

“I woke up in a psychiatric hospital. My
mother’s first words were that I’d had a miscarriage and had done
something very stupid and selfish, and that the doctors had to put
me on a suicide watch. She didn’t handle things well. I know I
embarrassed her. And now that I’m older I can only imagine what I
put my parents through, but she didn’t seem to want to face what I
had done either. Mom went on and on about what a blessing it was to
have the pregnancy out of the way, like this was her biggest
concern. Our relationship is not easy. She disapproves of most
everything I do.”