All That Is Bitter and Sweet (76 page)

3
18 to 45 percent carry the virus:
National AIDS Control Organization, India, “HIV Sentinel Surveillance and HIV Estimation in India 2007: A Technical Brief,” 2007,
http://www.avert.org/india-hiv-aids-statistics.htm
. For a fascinating technical article, please see “Repeated Surveys to Assess Changes in Behaviors and Prevalence of HIV/STIs in Populations at risk of HIV,”
www.fhi.org
, especially p. 100.

4
To break that cycle:
For more information on the Self-Employed Workers Association, please see
www.sewa.org
. For more information on women’s credit and lending, please see Darryl Collins, et al.,
Portfolios of the Poor: How the World’s Poor Live on $2 a Day
(Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press, 2009), and the website Women in Informal Employment: Globalizing and Organizing,
www.wiego.org
.

5
Account holders in Kamathipura:
For more information, please see
http://infochangeindia.org/Agenda/Against-exclusion/Sex-workers-as-economic-agents.html
.

6
Seane has a remarkable history:
For more information on Seane and her advocacy work, please see
www.seanecorn.com
, and
www.offthematintotheworld.org
.

7
Injecting drug users:
United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime,
Extent of Injecting Drug Use and HIV/AIDS in India
, Monograph/08, April 9, 2006,
www.unodc.org
.

8
Falkland Road Clinic was 37 percent:
Statistics supplied by PSI India. For a fascinating technical report that showcases how surveys are conducted, data collected, and methodology, see
Integrated Behavioral and Biological Assessment Report, Repeated Surveys to Assess Changes in Behaviors and Prevalence of HIV/STIs in Populations at Risk of HIV 2005–2007, India
, at
www.fhi.org

9
She had to let Kim go:
Kim has been clean, sober, and abstinent for thirty years. She is a licensed chemical dependency clinician with special expertise in experiential therapy and helping addicted youth. In 2005, she came home to Buffalo Gap from Austin, Texas, because she wanted to work with her mother at Shades of Hope. She regularly says that her parents’ detachment during her years of active addiction was the best thing they ever did for her.

Chapter 18

1
Truckers are already living with HIV:
Case Study: Transport Corporation of India Limited, September 2006, p. 35.
http://siteresources.worldbank.org/SOUTHASIAEXT/Resources/
Publications/448813-1183659111676/tci.pdf
Please see also
www.gatesfoundation.org/avahan/Documents/
Avahan_OffTheBeatenTrack.pdf
.

Chapter 19

1
Community-based antitrafficking NGO:
For more information about Ruchira Gupta and Apne Aap, see
www.apneaap.org
. Even a figure as brilliant and charismatic as Ruchira Gupta is not immune to controversy. While her intimate knowledge of and vision for ending sex slavery is unassailable, a few individuals have complained that the changes Ms. Gupta and Apne Aap strive for are to slow to come and that certain services rendered to survivors have not in some cases been significant enough. I have personally visited Apne Aap programs and know the extraordinary difficulty of the context in which they work is both impossible to fully describe or be apprehended by outsiders, including me.

2
What a priceless, indescribable gift:
This story is an example of the unforeseen complications and unintended consequences that inhere in the well-intentioned yet speculative work of intervening on another person’s behalf. Although we much appreciated Vinay Rai’s offer of a scholarship, it was ultimately declined in 2007 over a disagreement about publicity efforts for Rai University. PSI India subsequently paid Neelam’s monthly stipend toward her education of 5,000 rupees from our own funding. This ended in July 2010, when she was to have finished high school. The Mumbai team recently reestablished contact with her, and Neelam is reportedly in a private computer school, which is funded from the stipend.

3
A travesty of justice:
Happily, Naina was released and returned to her mother. An update is available at
www.apneaap.org/voices/survivors-conferences
. To learn more about her escape from slavery, please see the Sky News report
Saving India’s Sex Slaves
, April 10, 2007,
www.sky.com
.

Chapter 20

1
Unspeakable genocide in 1994:
The history and aftermath of genocide in Rwanda has been documented in many books, including Linda Melvern,
Conspiracy to Murder: The Rwandan Genocide
(London: Verso, 2004); Samantha Power,
A Problem from Hell: America and the Age of Genocide
(New York: Basic, 2002); and Mahmood Mamdani,
When Victims Become Killers: Colonialism, Nativism, and the Genocide in Rwanda
(Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press, 2001).

2
Kagame himself told me:
This meeting took place on a subsequent trip to Rwanda, September 1, 2010.

3
Lack of safe water:
Figures here were given to me by Rwanda’s minister of health.

4
To meet Zainab Salbi:
For more information about Women for Women International and how to help women survivors of war and armed conflict, please see
www.womenforwomen.org
.

5
Bring back traditional
gacacas:
Anne Aghion worked for ten years or more on a
gacaca
documentary trilogy—
Gacaca, Living Together Again in Rwanda; In Rwanda We Say … The Family That Does Not Speak Dies;
and
The Notebooks of Memory
—and the feature-length film
My Neighbor My Killer
, which spans the trilogy. See
www.anneaghionfilms.com/
.

6
A stunning 60 percent reduction:
From the PSI publication
Healthy Lives: Winning the Battle Against Malaria in Rwanda
,
www.psi.org
.

7
Population growth is reduced:
See
Return of the Population Growth Factor—Its Impact upon the Millennium Development Goals
, report of hearings by the All Party Parliamentary Group on Population, Development and Reproductive Health, London, January 2007.

Chapter 21

1
Life-destroying problem:
For more about fistula, please see
www.who.int/making_pregnancy_safer/topics/
maternal_mortality/en/index.html
and
www.endfistula.org
.

2
Our next stop:
For more information about the HEAL Africa program, please see
www.healafrica.org/

3
The insane and diabolical:
For a comprehensive history of the Congo tragedy, please see Adam Hochschild,
King Leopold’s Ghost: A Story of Greed, Terror, and Heroism in Colonial Africa
(New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1998).

4
The violence of poverty:
For more information on alleviating poverty, please see
www.thepowerofthepoor.com/concepts/c6.php
;
http://234next.com/csp/cms/sites/Next/News/5651294-147/
nigerian_others_receive_alternative_nobel_prize.csp
; and
www.grameenfoundation.org/what-we-do
.

5
A rather forgotten primate:
Special thanks to Vanessa Woods of Duke University for her help in checking the facts about bonobos. Please see her book:
Bonobo Handshake: A Memoir of Love and Adventure in the Congo
(New York: Gotham, 2010). For a discussion of primate behavior as it can shed light on human behavior, see Dale Peterson and Richard Wrangham,
Demonic Males: Apes and the Origins of Human Violence
(New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1990); Barbara Smuts, “Male Aggression Against Women: An Evolutionary Perspective,”
Human Nature
(1992); Diane L. Rosenfeld,
“Sexual Coercion, Patriarchal Violence, and Law,”
and Richard W. Wrangham and Martin N. Muller, “Sexual Coercion in Humans and Other Primates: The Road Ahead,” both in
Sexual Coercion in Primates and Humans: An Evolutionary Perspective on Male Aggression Against Females
, Muller and Wrangham, eds. (Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 2009).

Chapter 22

1
Carol Lee Flinders, one of my mentors:
My sister gave me a gloriously named book for my thirty-eighth birthday soon after I returned home from Shades of Hope. Reading Carol Lee Flinders’s
At the Root of This Longing: Reconciling a Spiritual Hunger and a Feminist Thirst
(New York: HarperCollins, 1998) was a revelation that spoke to my deepest beliefs. Through the wonderful networking that sisterhood intuitively and pragmatically supports, I was able to meet her immediately. “You wrote my book!” I exclaimed. Since then, Carol has become a close friend and adviser. She introduced me to one of my most cherished spiritual practices, passage meditation, which was brought to this country by her spiritual teacher, Eknath Easwaran. I am deeply indebted to Carol for the many gifts she has given me; her willingness to be my friend and share her life experiences with me has powerfully shaped my own.

2
Diane Rosenfeld, who taught a course:
An impeccable scholar who thinks outside the box, Professor Rosenfeld represents the very best Harvard has to offer. Her classroom is a dynamic space in which sharp analysis meets new ideas, yielding great hope that today’s students will be the pioneers who solve great social crises, such as gender violence, in this country and abroad. Given the extraordinarily painful nature of much of the material willingly faced by students and faculty alike, she is to be commended that her classroom is a safe and nurturing place in which the students’ thoughts and feelings are equally valued as portals to experiential change. Readers are urged to look in particular at Professor Rosenfeld’s articles on intimate partner violence, GPS monitoring for batterers who violate restraining orders, and lethality assessments and on how to bring those tools to their own communities, to help stop the epidemic of intimate partner homicides. Her pioneering work on the relevance of bonobos and female-to-female alliances for upending patriarchy is equally key. Links to her groundbreaking essays can be found at
http://dianerosenfeld.org
.

3
I couldn’t have guessed that my own story:
Becoming aware of the extraordinary normalization of sexual violence in mainstream pornography is profoundly unpleasant, but breaking this denial is essential. I highly recommend the following material, with the reminder that it is disturbing and traumatizing: “The Cruel Edge: The Painful Truth About Today’s Pornography—And What Men Can Do About It,” in
Sexual Assault Report
, January–February 2004; Gail Dines, Robert Jensen, and Ann Russo,
Pornography: The Production and Consumption of Inequality
(London: Routledge, 1998); Robert Jensen,
Getting Off: Pornography and the End of Masculinity
(Boston: South End, 2007); “Guilty Pleasures: Pornography, Prostitution, and Stripping,” from
The Macho Paradox: Why Some Men Hurt Women, and How All Men Can Help
by Jackson Katz (Chicago: Sourcebooks, 2006); and the documentary film
The Price of Pleasure
, produced, directed, and written by Dr. Chyng Sun,
http://thepriceofpleasure.com/
.

It has been mentioned in this book that boys and men are equally constrained and damaged by sexist attitudes and practices and that our brothers have an essential role to play in the peaceful transformation of unfair and imbalanced societies into ones where gender equality is the norm. Further discussion of this topic is outside the scope of this book, and the author encourages readers to explore recourses such as the International Center for Research on Women, including its GEMS program (
www.icrw.org
), and the MVP (Mentoring Violence Prevention) programs here in America,
www.jacksonkatz.com
.

Epilogue

1
“Powerfully powerless”:
Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu,
Made for Goodness
, p. 11.

Acknowledgments

1
Marshall Ganz (my glorious advisor):
Professor Ganz is a social movements and grassroots organizing pioneer who is a beloved favorite at the Kennedy School, and for ample reason. His generosity with students is legendary, as is his ability to effortlessly infuse academic work with personal meaning and passion. His courses on public narrative and moral leadership (the latter co-taught with Professor Bernard Steinberg) are transformative and unforgettable. For a window into his insights, please see Marshall Ganz,
Why David Sometimes Wins: Leadership, Organization, and Strategy in the California Farm Worker Movement
(Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2009).