All The Pretty Dead Girls (31 page)

Outside, the sky looked like snow.
Impossible,
Sue thought.
It’s still too early in the season.
November had just begun. Yet the gray, heavy sky looked ominous enough.

She looked over at Malika, studious as ever, her nose in a book. They’d never really talked about their argument, just fallen back into a careful routine with each other. They didn’t talk much. Mostly just “hellos” and “good-byes” and the occasional grunt in between.

“I’m heading into town,” Sue told her.

“They’ll stop you at the gate.”

“I have the guard fooled. I pull a cap down over my forehead and he thinks I’m a driver for one of the bigshots.”

Her roommate lifted an eye to look at her over her textbook. “You’re breaking the rules,” she said softly.

“Promise you won’t squeal?”

Malika returned to her reading. “I’m not the type. I challenge authority.”

There was just the slightest emphasis on “I” and it pissed Sue off. “And are you implying I do not?”

“I’m merely referencing your support for these armed fascist goons on campus.”

“Oh, please,” Sue said. “Have you ever talked to one of those guys? They’re quite sweet. As if they’d ever do anything to harm one of—”

A strange image flashed through her mind. A guard—clamping a gloved hand down over a girl’s mouth.

Had she dreamed it? She didn’t remember.

“I’m sorry, I don’t trust them. Grow up a black woman in this country and you’ll learn that you can’t just blindly trust a group of white guys with guns.”

That statement just pissed Sue off all the more. “Look, would you really rather the administration did nothing?”

Malika threw down her book. “That’s exactly what they did! Nothing! For weeks! Not a word to any of us about Joelle and Tish going missing! Just lies!”

Sue gave her a bemused face. “Tish Lewis isn’t missing.”

“What do you mean?”

Sue began to answer, then realized she didn’t know. Why had she said Tish wasn’t missing? As far as she knew, Tish still hadn’t been found…

Or had she?

“I guess it’s just a feeling I have,” she said, puzzling to herself. “I guess I think she’ll turn up.”

“Well, I’m not nearly so optimistic.”

Anger flared again. “That’s what’s wrong with you, Malika! You’re always so pessimistic, always so ready to see the bad side of things!”

“Tell me a good side to any of this!”

Sue glared at her. “You know, maybe your problem is that you just haven’t gotten laid lately.”

Where did that come from? Even as Sue said the words, she was aghast at what she was saying. Certainly
she
hadn’t gotten laid—she had never gotten laid. But she was deliberately giving the impression to Malika that she and Billy were having sex. And the weirdest part—she was enjoying doing it!

Malika stood up to face her. “That is uncalled for, Sue Barlow!”

Sue laughed, even as part of her hated herself for doing so. “You know, Malika, I’m beginning to wonder if maybe you just don’t like men. Maybe in fact you’re a lesbian. Ever consider it?”

Her roommate’s eyes were nearly popping out of her head. “I am not a lesbian!” she shouted.

“Not that there’d be anything wrong with that, right, Miss Limousine Liberal? Excuse me, Ms. Limousine Liberal.”

“Fuck you, Sue!”

Sue laughed. “I’m beginning to think you want to.”

She gathered up her pocketbook and cell phone.

“If anyone reports me for going off campus,” she said, one last parting shot, “I’ll know it was you.”

She closed the door behind her.

Once again Sue made it past the guard.

Driving into town, she was mystified as to why she had deliberately provoked Malika in that way. But she had to admit, she enjoyed it.

“That bitch thinks she knows everything,” Sue said to herself. “I’ll show her a thing or two.”

Oh, her roommate got her so mad…

She found a spot to park on Main Street. She was supposed to meet Billy at the Yellow Bird. She looked at her watch and saw that she was early. She’d go in anyway, and grab a booth.

She took one close to the door. “I’ll just have a strawberry shake,” she said when Marjorie offered her a menu.

She sat there and stared out the window. The square was deserted. She watched the bare trees bend and swing in the strong wind. The sky was still dark.
It’s going to snow,
Sue thought.

And sure enough—a few wispy flakes began turning in the air.

“Well, will you look at that?” Marjorie said as she placed her shake in front of her. “The first snow of the season. Gets earlier every year.”

“It won’t amount to much,” Sue said.

“Let’s hope not,” the waitress said before moving away.

Sue took a sip. She was surprised at how angry she still was at Malika. Part of her said the fight had been all her fault, that she’d goaded her roommate into it by calling her a lesbian. But what if she had? Malika had only gotten what she had coming to her.

“She’ll learn,” Sue whispered.

“Do you mind if I join you?”

A voice startled her out of her reverie.

She looked up and instead of seeing Billy, she saw an older man. Sixties probably. Small, some kind of Hispanic. She resisted her Manhattan upbringing—that instinct drilled into her from childhood to not talk to strangers, to dismiss him with a wave of her hand and a curt “no.” Why this older man wanted to sit in the same booth with her was rather peculiar and even a bit creepy—but Sue was intrigued. She gave him a slight shrug. “Be my guest,” she said.

“I’m Father Ortiz,” he said as he slid into the booth across from her. He smiled at her as he opened his coat and shrugged it off his shoulders, revealing his priestly collar.

“You’re a priest?” Sue asked.

“I am.”

“Catholic?”

He nodded. “Right again.”

Sue gave him a strange look.

“I just wanted a moment of your time, Miss Barlow.”

“How do you know my name? My boyfriend will be here in a minute—”

“This won’t take long,” said Father Ortiz. “I understand you had a rather interesting encounter with a friend of mine recently at the hospital.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You seem sad,” he replied as though she had said nothing. “Is everything all right?”

He seemed genuinely interested. Sue thought that his eyes looked kind.

“I don’t know you,” she told him.

“But I know you, Miss Barlow. I know that you must be very confused right now. Even frightened.”

“Why would I be frightened?”

“It’s not hopeless, you know. It doesn’t have to go the way they are expecting. You still have your own self-will. You still have a soul—”

“Okay, now I’m thinking you’re crazy. Who are ‘they’? I’m thinking I should call the waitress and have her kick you out of—”

“I suspect you are not usually so belligerent. Does it frighten you? Concern you?”

Sue stared at him. “Your friend at the hospital. You mean that freak, don’t you? Bernadette deSalis? How dare she speak of my mother!”

“It must have been hard for you to grow up without your mother.”

How does he know so much about me?

Sue narrowed her eyes at him, ready to tell him to
get the fuck out of her face!

But suddenly—she softened.

“I wish I had known her,” she said, slumping.

“There’s been a lot of tragedy lately,” Father Ortiz said. “You’re a caring girl, I can see that. I know you don’t want any more to occur.”

Sue picked up the wrapper of her straw and began shredding it. The priest was making her uncomfortable, despite the kindness in his eyes and the gentleness of his voice. There was something about him—
he’s dangerous to you—
that unsettled her.

Still, he seemed to have answers…

“It’s almost like,” she said, struggling to get the words out, “the college is under some kind of curse.”

“As though there are dark forces at work there?”

Father Ortiz’s smile was still kind, but his eyes narrowed a fraction, and the twinkle in them seemed to go out as he spoke. “Tell me, Sue. Do you believe in evil?” He tilted his head to one side slightly. “Evil as a force that exists in the world?”

Sue shifted in her seat, and looked down at her melting milk shake. The straw wrapper lay in shreds next to her glass. “I suppose that without evil, good cannot exist,” she replied. The words came from nowhere. “They need each other. They define each other.”

He laughed gently. “Many theologians have debated and written about this very question—indeed, far greater minds than mine.”

Sue was growing increasingly uncomfortable. “Why did you sit down here with me? Did you come here specifically looking for me?”

“I admit I did. I was at the hospital in Senandaga just now. Mike deSalis is being sent home as we speak. He has made a full and complete recovery.” Father Ortiz smiled. “Your boyfriend was there, cheering him on, and I heard him say he had to hurry back here to meet you.”

“And so you came to tell me this?”

The priest nodded. “I wanted to see your reaction.”

“I’m happy, of course. Mike is Billy’s best friend.”

“Heidi Swettenham is also going home.”

Sue stared at him.

“Both are better,” the priest told her, “because they were cured through the intercession of Our Lady, the Blessed Virgin Mary.”

Billy was at the hospital to see Heidi. That’s why he’s late. That’s why he’s not here.

“Only Bernadette kept the faith,” Father Ortiz said. “All along, she knew her brother would be all right. As would Heidi.” He leaned in close to Sue. “So there are other forces at work, too, Miss Barlow. I just wanted you to know that.”

“Bernadette,” Sue said, her voice low.

“Yes, Bernadette. The girl you called a freak.” He reached over and placed a hand over Sue’s. “She’s quite concerned about you.”

She pulled her hand away. “She doesn’t know me! She told me lies about my mother….”

Lies that Sue had blocked out of her mind, refused to think about…

“Father Ortiz,” said a new voice.

It was Billy. Sue was never more delighted to see anyone.

“Hello, Billy,” the priest said, standing up. “I was just keeping your girlfriend company until you got here. I’ve already given her the good news about Mike.”

Father Ortiz turned to face Sue.

“Pleased to have met you, Miss Barlow,” he told her.

Then he headed out.

Billy slid into the booth in his place. “What was that all about? You seem bugged by him.”

Sue couldn’t reply right away.

Do you believe in evil, Sue?

“Billy,” she said all at once. “I have to get back to campus.”

“Why? You think they know you left—?”

“No,” Sue said. “I just have to get back! It’s Malika!”

She stood, rushing out of the booth, forgetting to pay. Billy threw down a five on the table and followed her out onto the street.

“What’s wrong with Malika?” he shouted.

“She’s sick!” Sue screamed, running toward her car. “I’ve got to get to her!”

“Then I’m coming with you!”

She didn’t object. They both hopped into Sue’s car and sped back to Wilbourne. Guests weren’t permitted during the day like this, but Billy would just have to pose as one of the grad students. By now the guard was used to seeing the Lexus going in and out, so he didn’t even try to stop them as they came through the gate. Billy kept asking her how she knew Malika was sick, but Sue couldn’t answer him. She was crying too hard.

She skidded to a stop in the student parking lot. “If she’s dead,” Sue cried, “it’s all my fault!”

Billy hurried to keep up with her as she ran across the pavement. “What the fuck is going on, Sue?”

But she didn’t take time to answer him. Up the steps in Bentley they ran, several girls doing wide-eyed double takes when they saw Billy. Sue didn’t even wait for the elevator, just took the stairs three at a time.

And once inside her room, she saw she was right.

Malika was on the floor, gasping for breath.

“Malika!” Sue shouted, Billy hot on her heels.

She bent down over her roommate. Malika’s eyes had rolled toward the back of her head.

“I’ll call 911,” Billy said.

“Malika,” Sue called. “Can you hear me?”

She cradled the other girl’s head in her lap.

“I want you to live! Do you hear me? I want you to get better! You will be
fine
! Do you hear me? You were my first friend when I came to Wilbourne. You are still my friend! I want you to live, Malika!”