Always You (11 page)

“I think I saw him head out the
front before? He was on the phone . . . ”

“Okay. I better get back
downstairs. Are you okay? You’re looking a little flushed. Do you have a
fever?”

I clamped my hand over my mouth
to smother my snigger as Wrenn insisted she was fine. After the door closed I
rapped on the balcony door and waited until Wrenn appeared.

“I couldn’t go without kissing
you again,” I said, running my fingers through her hair.

She smiled, her lips meeting mine,
the smell of her pussy all around me. “Go,” she ordered.

I nodded and walked over to the
edge of the balcony where it met the brick exterior of the house. Hoisting
myself over the ledge, I let myself drop onto the ground. I stood up and
brushed myself off, then walked back inside as if nothing had happened.

Wrenn

A blush crept over my face as I
thought about last night.

Dalton, going down on me . . .
God, the way I felt when his tongue explored me. That was the most intimate I’d
ever been with anyone. Much more intimate than sex, or giving head. As a woman,
there was something so personal about having someone go down on you . . . ugh,
I couldn’t even put it into words.

I stayed in bed for as long as
I could, reliving last night. With every thought, my core tingled, aching to
feel his touch again. My fingers brushed over my nipples, which stood hard and
erect.

Closing my eyes, I thought
about him and how good he made me feel. The way his tongue had massaged my clit
had me almost coming on the spot. My fingers trailed down between my legs. I
imagined him there, kissing, caressing. I slipped a finger inside myself. I was
so wet. Thinking about him got me so aroused.

I began to rub harder as the
urge to be satisfied began to build. I imagined his erection pressing at my
entrance, teasing me.
 

I thought about the other
night, after the hot tub. I’d wanted him so badly that my body ached for him. I
circled my clit, reliving the thought of him driving himself inside me and
pushing me to the brink. I gasped as my body spasmed, my own touch almost too
much to handle.

I softly rubbed my wetness, the
euphoria engulfing me until I could take no more. I sighed and rolled over,
exhausted and yet so content.

***

I made my way downstairs,
thinking about Dalton. God, even the thought of him had me smiling. We were so
close to the end, I felt like nothing could ruin this for us.

Except maybe Paige.

Since she’d accosted me the
other day, she had stayed out of my way. No more mention of what she thought
she knew. She had even stopped her abuse of me.

Dalton was convinced she
wouldn’t say anything. With no proof, it was our word against hers, and Paige
was all about appearances. The last thing she would want to do is snitch. I
wished I shared his confidence, but part of me was just waiting for her to do
or say something. I knew her well enough to know she wouldn’t just back away
quietly. That wasn’t her style.

As I rounded the corner, I
heard Dalton’s name. I stopped short, pushing myself up against the wall so
Layna wouldn’t see me. I strained to hear what she was saying. My heart began
to pound.
This was it: Paige had told
her. It was over
. I felt dizzy as I struggled to breathe. Oh, God, not like
this.

“Honey, I promised you I’d look
out for him, and I have been.” Layna’s voice was soft. Now I was confused.
Honey?
Who was she talking to? Layna
chuckled. “You’re supposed to worry about him, you’re his mother.”

I froze. Dalton’s mother. This
wasn’t about us. Relief rushed through me.
Thank
fucking God.

“I know, I understand. I would
be, too. What age did Derek start showing symptoms?” Silence. “Uh-huh.” More
silence.

Who the hell was Derek? And
what did they mean ‘symptoms?’ Of what?

“You’re worrying about
something that might never happen. If Dalton does turn out to have this
disease, you’ll deal with it, and you won’t be alone. You’ll have Dan and me. I
have no idea if it’s better for him to have the test or not. It’s his personal
choice whether he wants to know or not.”

My heart raced as I tried to process
what I was hearing. He might be sick. Dalton might be sick. My brain ached as I
ran through all the possible worst-case scenarios in my head. Why hadn’t he
told me? What was wrong with him?

Oh God, I couldn’t handle this.

My legs buckled under me. I lost
my balance, crashing into an oversized, poorly positioned vase. My toe throbbed
as I hopped around.

“Mary, I have to go.” I heard
the phone click, and then Layna appeared around the corner. She grabbed my arm
to steady me, and helped me over to the sofa.

“Wrenn, what are you doing?”
she exclaimed, furrowing her brows.

I shook my head, not sure of
what to say. “I was walking down and I heard you on the phone. It sounded like
something I shouldn’t interrupt, so I waited . . . ”

“You eavesdropped?” she clarified,
shaking her head in annoyance.

I blushed, not used to being
chastised by Layna.

“Honestly Wrenn, that was a
private conversation.”

“Then maybe you shouldn’t have
been having it in the middle of the living room?” I shot back.

She narrowed her eyes and
frowned at me.

“So, Dal—Mr. Reid is
sick?” I asked, trying to keep the emotion from my voice. Inside, I was a
wreck.

Layna sighed and sat down next
to me. “He might be. He might be fine. We don’t know.”

“What ‘might be’ wrong with
him? Is it serious?” I asked. At this point I couldn’t care less if my concern
sounded misplaced. My heart was racing, a million thoughts flying through my
head about what could be wrong with him.

Layna nodded, and then sighed
loudly. “I can’t talk to you about this, Wrenn. I’m sorry. Try not to worry.”

Try not to worry?
I was past worrying. In my head, I was already
planning his freaking funeral. I jumped up.
I
have to get out of here.
If I stayed any longer, everything would come
tumbling out. Heading for the door, I grabbed my bag and my keys.

“I’m going to see Kass. I’ll
speak to you later.” I forced myself to sound natural and even managed a smile.

“All right. And Wrenn? Keep
this to yourself, okay?”

***

I pulled up outside the river,
my hands shaking. It was raining, but I opened my door and stepped out anyway.
I needed to feel something, anything, to distract me from the thoughts racing
through my head at a million miles an hour. The rain fell down on me, huge,
cold drops of water splashing against my face, but I barely noticed. I was
soaking wet and I didn’t care. The cold air hit me, barely even registering.

He can’t be sick. I can’t lose him too.

I walked over to the river’s
edge, kicking at the rocks that lined the path. I dropped down to my knees,
sitting in the cold, wet mud as the rain continued to fall around me.

It wasn’t fucking fair. Hadn’t
I been through enough already? Was my life some kind of joke? If there was a
God, he was probably up there laughing at poor Wrenn and all her tragedies. It
was one thing after another, and I wasn’t sure how much more I could handle. I
tried so hard to keep myself together and to not dwell on the past, but you’ve
got to be fucking kidding me. This was too much.

And then it hit me, what a
horrible person I was.

I’d made all this about me. I
couldn’t even imagine maybe having some disease that might take hold of me at
any moment. Poor Dalton. And his mom. How awful it must be for her, losing her
husband and then wondering if the same disease was going to rob her of her son.

For the next hour I sat alone
on the bank of the river, sopping wet and freezing cold. My mood changed from
feeling sorry for myself to feeling sorry for Dalton, and back again. In the
distance, thunder rang through the sky and lightning flashed. I sat there,
oblivious. I didn’t care about anything.

Except for him.

Dalton

From the comfort of my sofa, I
listened to the sound of the storm coming. With the heater on high and my
laptop on my knee, I was glad to be inside. The only thing missing was
Wrenn—beautiful, sweet Wrenn.

I closed my eyes and imagined
her face. Those piercing eyes could stare right into my soul. Her lips, with
one kiss, could make all my problems seem pointless and comical. She was
perfect. And she was mine.

Next year we could truly be
together. Our relationship could be real, and not hidden behind lies and
secrets. When I thought about Wrenn, I saw my future as bright, and full of
possibilities.

But there was one thing in my
way. I needed to tell her. Since I’d kept it from her this entire time, there
was no way to do this now without looking like a dick. The thing was, she had
made me realize that even if the test came back positive, my life was far from
over. This didn’t
have
to be the
death sentence I saw it as. It could be a blessing. Everyone has to die
sometime. I’d have probably ten, maybe twenty years before my symptoms would
begin to show, and then probably another ten more.

What scared me the most was
living those years without her. She made everything worthwhile. But she had
been through so much already. Was it fair of me to expect her to stand by my
side and watch me slip away?

My phone buzzed. I dug it out
of my pocket and checked the message. It was Wrenn.

I need to talk to you. Can you meet me at the river?

I glanced outside. The rain
pounded down heavily against the windowpane. What the hell was she doing out in
this weather?

Give me ten minutes.

I could see her in the
distance, sitting on the edge of the riverbank, staring out into the storm.
What the fuck was she doing?
I jumped
out of the car, the force of the wind hitting me in the face.

“Wrenn!” I yelled.

She tensed, but didn’t turn.

I ran over and touched her
shoulder, not caring that now I, too, was soaked. “What are you doing out here?
Come, get in the car.”

She turned to face me, her eyes
puffy. She’d been crying. “What’s wrong with you?” she asked, her voice
overpowering the sound of the rain falling. Her fists were balled up at her
sides as she waited for me to say something.

I froze. What did she know?

“What do you mean?” I
sputtered, wiping the stream of raindrops off my forehead.

“I heard Layna on the phone
with your mom. What the hell is wrong with you, Dalton?”

Oh God, no.

“Come on, Wrenn. Get in the
car, and I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.”

She yanked her hand away from
me and stood up. “Just tell me!” she screamed. She was soaked, her white blouse
now sheer and clinging to her like a second skin. She shivered as rainwater
slowly drizzled down her cheeks. I knew the only way to get her out of this
storm was to tell her. With the mood she was in, there was no reasoning with
her, not right now.

“My father had a genetic
illness called Huntington’s disease. There is a fifty percent chance I have
it,” I said.

She looked up, her eyes dark
and full of sadness. Her brows creased together as she continued to scowl at
me. She was angry. Not that I blamed her; I’d be angry with me, too.

“Your father, he died from
this?” she demanded.

“Wrenn—”

“Answer the fucking question,
Dalton!”

“Yes, okay? Is that what you
want to hear? Yes, Wrenn, there is a fifty-fifty chance I might have this
wonderful disease that will eventually kill me.”

“Were you ever going to tell
me?” She wiped her eyes.

I wanted so badly to reach out
and comfort her. I nodded.

“When? Because if you were
waiting until I’d already fallen for you, you’re right on time.” She pushed
past me and ran to her car.

“Wrenn, will you please talk to
me?” I yelled after her.

She didn’t stop. I stood there,
helpless, as she jumped into her car and took off.

Fuck!
I kicked a stray stone into the lake. Of all the scenarios
I’d run through in my head of the time I finally told her, this was a thousand
times worse.

All I wanted was to spare her
pain, but in the process I’d hurt her more. I had lied to her, plain and
simple. As soon as we began to get serious, I should’ve told her. But I hadn’t
and it became harder and harder as time moved on.

Wrenn

I threw myself down on my bed,
not bothering to strip the wet clothes from my body. This couldn’t be
happening. How could life be so unfair? The thought of losing him was too much.
I couldn’t go through life with him just waiting for this disease to attack.

I sat up and walked over to my
desk. Sitting down, I flicked open my laptop. I typed “Huntington’s disease”
into Google and clicked on the first link: an entry from the Huntington’s
Society of America. I’d never even heard of it. I had no idea what it entailed,
or what kind of life he could expect if he did in fact have the disease. Would
he just drop dead one day? Would there be symptoms? All these questions were
racing through my mind, unanswered.

 
. . . Huntington’s disease
is a neurodegenerative disease that causes breakdown of brain cells . . .

 
. . . symptoms include
muscle coordination loss, memory loss and loss of cognitive function . . .

 
. . . no known cure . . .

 
. . . life expectancy after
initial showing of symptoms is usually ten to twenty years . . .

    
I slammed the laptop shut and stood up. I
felt sick. Reading any more was going to make me feel worse. As amazing as the
internet was, when it came to finding correct information, searching while an
emotional mess was
not
a good idea.

Grabbing my phone, I deleted
the numerous missed calls and texts from Dalton, and called Kass.

    
“What’s up?” Kass answered almost
immediately, sounding like her usual upbeat self.

    
“It’s me. I need to get out of here. Will
you come with me?” My tone must have told her this was serious, because for
once she didn’t question me.

    
“Of course. I’ll be there in ten.”

    
Hanging up, I shoved a change of clothes
into an overnight bag along with my brush and toothbrush. Zipping it up, I went
downstairs. Thank God everyone was out. I left Layna a note saying I’d gone out
with Kass and would be back the next day. Before I went outside, I fished
around in the bottom drawer for the spare key to the beach house. My fingers
finally grasped hold of it. Shoving it into my pocket, I went outside to wait
for Kass.

***

    
True to her word, ten minutes later Kass
pulled into the driveway. I climbed into the passenger seat and clicked on my
seatbelt. Kass glanced at me with concern as she backed out of the driveway.

    
“Are you okay?”

    
“Not really.” I muttered. I put my head back
and closed my eyes. “Can we go to Cinter Beach? My aunt has a holiday house
there.”

Kass nodded. For the first time
ever, she was speechless. She could see I was upset, and I think she didn’t
know whether to try and get me to talk or not.

    
The first fifteen minutes of our drive were
spent in total silence. Kass was focused on driving, and me, I was lost in my
thoughts. Sighing, I stared out the window. The storm had passed, but the day
was still miserable, reflecting my mood perfectly.

    
“He might be sick.”

    
Kass whipped her head around, alarmed. Her
brown eyes were full of concern as she waited for me to continue.

    
“Dalton,” I clarified. “He might be dying.”

    
“What do you mean?” Kass said carefully. Her
hands clenched the steering wheel as she glanced intermittently at me.

    
I snorted. “I don’t know. He might have a
genetic disease that is terminal, but it won’t show up for years. Decades,
even. But it will, eventually, kill him.”

    
“Oh, Wrenn. Shit, that’s bad. There is no
way to find out whether he has it?” she asked softly.

I shrugged. What did I know?
Nothing.

She reached over to me, her
hand closing over mine. “I’m so sorry, Wrenn.”

    
“He didn’t even tell me himself, Kass. I
overhead Layna on the phone to his mom. How could he not tell me something like
that?”

I shook my head, still so
angry. I deserved to know if the guy I was falling in love with was going to
die. I deserved to fucking know, dammit. I felt cheated. Betrayed. Would
knowing that have changed the way I’d felt about him? It didn’t change who he
was, but it might have affected my decision to chase him.

    
“Maybe he didn’t know how to broach it. I
can’t imagine it would be an easy conversation to start,” she reasoned.

I glanced at her.

Maybe she was right. I gazed
out the window again, closing my eyes. Maybe he was trying to protect me. I
could’ve gone the next twenty years not knowing that I might lose him. Would
that have been better than this?

    
I didn’t know. God, I was so confused.

***

    
“Wrenn.”

    
I opened my eyes and glanced around. Cinter
Beach. Where I had spent the majority of my childhood vacations. Smooth, white
sand that stretched for miles, crystal clear water, cute little ice cream
stores that stayed open late into the night. Not so much in the dead of winter,
though.

I had so many memories. Remembering
made me sad. It made me wish Mom was there so I could talk to her. What advice
would she give me? Forgetting for a moment that Dalton was my teacher, Mom
would’ve told me to go with my heart. True, unconditional love was such a rare
thing to find that a short time was better than not experiencing it at all.

    
“Up on the hill. The one with the white
fence,” I mumbled, realizing that Kass was waiting for directions. As she drove
along the boulevard, memories of my childhood came rushing back: Dad, teaching
me how to body board; eating ice cream on the beach with Mom and Layna;
fighting with Jordan over which room was mine. I wiped a stray tear from my
eye.

    
Kass pulled into the driveway. I opened the
door and stepped out. We walked up the steps together to the front door. I
hadn’t been there since the summer before the accident. As I walked to the
door, a sense of peace overwhelmed me, despite the crazy memories flooding
back. I felt close to my family here, close like I hadn’t felt in weeks
—
months, even.

    
Inside, we walked through to the kitchen.
Everything looked just as it had two years ago, but for a thin layer of dust
covering the sofa and the small glass coffee table lying in front of it. I
walked out the back, over to the fuse box, and clicked on the power and water.
Inside, the kitchen lit up and the fridge came to life.

    
“This place is nice,” muttered Kass, turning
full circle, her expression one of awe. “You’ve been hiding this little gem
from me,” she accused.

    
“I’d forgotten about it,” I admitted,
sinking into an oversized leather armchair.

Kass joined me, sinking into
its twin. Maybe ‘forgotten’ was the wrong word. I’d pushed this place out of my
mind so I didn’t have to deal with the memories.

    
“Do you wanna talk about it?” Kass asked
gently.

    
“I don’t know what there is to say.” Would
talking change anything? Nope. “Do you know anything about Huntington’s
disease?” I half joked.

    
She shook her head. “And please tell me you
haven’t Googled it,” she added.

I winced.

“Wrenn! God, stay off the freaking
computer. Talk to Dalton. You have questions, ask him. God,” she said again,
shaking her head. “Didn’t you learn that time you thought you had cancer
because Dr. Google analyzed your symptoms?”

    
Obviously
not.

    
I checked my phone. Twenty missed calls. I
held it up so Kass could see. She groaned and shook her head. I knew what she
was thinking: give the poor guy a break. Only, I wasn’t ready to. I didn’t
trust myself to get through a sentence without bursting into tears. I needed
time to digest all of this. I needed time to figure out what my next move was.

“I’m going for a walk,” I
mumbled, standing up.

“Do you want me to come?” Kass
asked.

I shook my head. I needed some
space. I needed time alone to figure out my head.
 
I leaned over and hugged her, knowing
how lucky I was to have a friend like her.

***

About a five minute walk down
the road and off a dirt track was the little swimming spot where we used to go.
The white sandy stretch of beach was sheltered by huge oak trees which made it
the perfect spot to relax.

I walked over and sat down on
the broken tree that served as a seat. I ran my fingers over the engravings
carved into the wood, one in particular catching my eye:
Best summer ever, 2009.

I had been fourteen that
summer. We had come down to the beach house for the entire summer vacation, and
I had met a boy. It was that summer I had my first kiss. I smiled as I
remembered telling Mom after it had happened. We’d sat up late drinking hot
cocoa, talking about things, and somehow the conversation became about him.

I couldn’t even remember the
boy’s name. Sam or Steve or something. I never saw or heard from him again, but
it was the closeness I felt to Mom that I’d cherish forever.

Kicking off my shoes, I walked
over to the edge of the shore and dipped my toes in the freezing water. I
watched as the tiny waves lapped at my feet before being soaked up into the
sand, then falling back into the sea.

My mind turned to Dalton. I
thought about how special he made me feel. Nobody had made me feel that way in
such a long time. It sucked this was happening, but it didn’t change the way I
felt about him.

It didn’t change the fact that
I was in love with him.