American Indian Trickster Tales (Myths and Legends) (13 page)

“How can you say such a foolish thing?” his mother scolded him. “Your poor father is dead. Also your father was old and ugly. This one is young and handsome.”

“He has the same look in his eyes as Father,” the little boy persisted.

“Be quiet,” said his mother.

Coyote married his daughters. “Take whomever you want first,” said Coyote’s wife. “I am going to bed.”

“I’ll start with your eldest daughter, dear mother-in-law,” said Coyote.

That night Coyote copulated with his eldest daughter. “Oh, oh, it hurts!” she cried.

“Only the first time,” said her mother. “From then on it feels good.”

The next night Coyote slept with his younger daughter. “Oh, oh,” she cried, “it hurts!”

Her mother told her: “It was the same with me. It hurts the first time. Later you can’t get enough of it.”

Coyote said to himself: “This is so much better than with the old woman.”

Some time later his wife said: “Son-in-law, I feel like eating rabbit. Could you get some for me?” Coyote left to hunt rabbits. He took his little boy with him. Coyote had the power to make himself big or small to fit any situation. He made himself small and crept into a rabbit hole and killed all the rabbits inside. He ate the biggest and threw the others out of the hole to take home.

“That is exactly how Father used to do it,” thought the boy. He told this to his mother.

“Your father is dead,” said his mother. “And no man ever marries his daughters. It is forbidden. One cannot even imagine it.”

A few days later Coyote again went out with his boy to hunt. They did not catch anything. “Let’s sit down and rest awhile,” said Coyote. He began telling his son funny Trickster tales. He laughed at his own stories, grinning from ear to ear. Then the little boy saw that Coyote had four teeth missing, one at the upper left and one at the upper right, one at the lower left and one at the lower right. This was something Coyote had not been able to change. The son ran back to his mother, crying: “It is Father! It is Father! You can tell by his teeth! He has done what one cannot even imagine!”

The mother asked her daughters: “What does your husband do when you make love?”

“He sucks our breasts,” the daughters told her.

“That’s what he does with me!” cried their mother. “It is your father! The boy was right!”

Just then Coyote came home. His wife went after him with her skinning knife, screaming: “You unspeakable man, you have done the unimaginable!”

Coyote was running away from her, crying: “Calm down, old woman, from now on I sleep only with you!”

His daughters were so ashamed they flew up onto the sky and became stars.

In the beginning there were only two human beings in this world—Old Man Coyote and Coyote Woman. Old Man Coyote lived on one side of the world, Coyote Woman on the other. By chance they met.

“How strange,” said Old Man Coyote. “We are exactly alike.”

“I don’t know about that,” said Coyote Woman. “You’re holding a bag. What’s in it?”

Old Man Coyote reached into his bag and brought out a penis. “This odd thing.”

“It is indeed an odd thing,” said Coyote Woman. “It looks funny. What is it for?”

“I don’t know,” said Old Man Coyote. “I don’t know what to use it for. What do you have in your bag?”

Coyote Woman dug deep into her bag and came up with a vagina. “You see,” she said, “we are not alike. We carry different things in our bags. Where should we put them?”

“I think we should put them into our navels,” said Old Man Coyote. “The navel seems to be a good place for them.”

“No, I think not,” said Coyote Woman. “I think we should stick them between our legs. Then they will be out of the way.”

“Well, all right,” said Old Man Coyote. “Let’s put them there.” They placed these things between their legs.

“You know,” said Coyote Woman, “it seems to me that the strange thing you have there would fit this odd thing of mine.”

“Well, you might be right,” said Old Man Coyote. “Let’s find out.” Coyote stuck his penis into Coyote Woman’s vagina.

“Um, that feels good,” said Coyote Woman.

“You are right,” said Old Man Coyote. “It feels very good, indeed. I have never felt this way before.”

“Neither have I,” said Coyote Woman. “It occurred to me that this might be the way to make other human beings. It would be nice to have company.”

“It certainly would,” said Old Man Coyote. “Just you and me could become boring.”

“Well, in case doing what we just did should result in bringing forth more human beings, what should they be like?” said Coyote Woman.

“Well, I think they should have eyes and mouth going up and down.”

“No, no,” said Coyote Woman. “Then they would not be able to see well, and food would dribble out of the lower corner of their mouths. Let’s have their eyes and mouths go crosswise.”

“I think that the men should order the women about,” said Old Man Coyote, “and that the women should obey them.”

“We’ll see about that,” said Coyote Woman. “I think that the men should pretend to be in charge and that the women should pretend to obey, but that in reality it should be the other way around.”

“I can’t agree to this,” said Old Man Coyote.

“Why quarrel?” said Coyote Woman. “Let’s just wait and see how it will work out.”

“All right, let’s wait and see. How should the men live?”

“The men should hunt, kill buffalo and bears, and bring the meat to the women. They should protect the women at all times.”

“Well, that could be dangerous for the men,” said Old Man Coyote.

“A buffalo bull or a bear could kill a man. Is it fair to put the men in such danger? What should the women do in return?”

“Why, let the women do the work,” said Coyote Woman. “Let them cook, and fetch water, and scrape and tan hides with buffalo brains. Let them do all these things while the men take a rest from hunting.”

“Well, then we agree upon everything,” said Old Man Coyote. “Then it’s settled.”

“Yes,” said Coyote Woman. “And why don’t you stick that funny thing of yours between my legs again?”

Coyote and Fox were wandering. They were hungry. Coyote said: “I am too lazy to hunt for myself. Let somebody else provide food for me.”

“You mean for
us,”
said Fox.

“Well, all right, for us.”

“How do we do this?” Fox asked.

“You take after your father,” said Coyote. “He was slow-witted, and so are you. I take after my father, who was wise; therefore I am very clever. Let us marry some men who are good hunters and will provide for us.”

“How can we marry men when we ourselves are men?”

“We will disguise ourselves by putting on women’s clothes. They won’t know that we are men.”

“They will find out when they want to cohabit with us. They will want to right away.”

“Don’t worry,” Coyote assured him. “Leave it all to me.”

Coyote and Fox put on women’s clothes. They went to a place where two Wolf Brothers lived. Coyote had heard that these Wolves were mighty hunters. They arrived at the Wolves’ lodge. They went inside. The Wolf Brothers were there, eating.

“We are two maidens come to marry you,” said Coyote. “Your parents and our parents, who live in that camp beyond those mountains, arranged it for us.”

“Well, yes,” said the Wolf Brothers, “we always wanted to marry comely maidens like you. Well, we consider ourselves married already.”

The one brother pointed to Coyote and said: “I will marry you, and my brother will take this one,” pointing at Fox.

“Yes,” said the other brother. “I will take my new wife to that corner over there, and you, my brother, will take yours to the far corner over there. We will cohabit right away.”

“Not so fast,” said Coyote. “Before we marry and sleep with you, we must make sure that you can provide for beautiful maidens such as us. For four days you shall feed us—only the best, mind you. Then, after we have satisfied ourselves that you are skilled hunters, we will marry and cohabit.”

“Well, you are certainly very demanding,” said the Wolves, “but we will do what you want.”

For four days the Wolves went out hunting. Every evening they came back with loads of meat—buffalo, elk, deer, antelope, fowls of every kind. Coyote and Fox gorged themselves. At the end of the fourth day, bloated with food, Fox whispered to Coyote: “There arises now a situation difficult to handle.”

“Just watch me,” Coyote whispered back.

“Well,” said the Wolves, “it is now time to get married and cohabit.”

“Yes, certainly,” said Coyote. “You have shown us that you are great hunters, but first I have to answer a call of nature.” To Fox he whispered: “Brother, pretty soon these wolves will be in a hurry to leave this lodge. Then run for your life!” Coyote went out.

After a short while the Wolves said to Fox: “Your sister takes her time relieving herself.” In the meantime, Coyote had run to a nearby lodge belonging to the Wolf Brothers’ mother. Coyote crept into the lodge. The Wolf Mother was sleeping. Coyote quickly lifted her skirt and entered her. Wolf Mother woke up and realized what was done to her. She howled with anger and anguish. Her howl reverberated through the forest. The Wolf Brothers heard it. They tore out of the lodge to run to their mother’s aid. Then Fox ran for his life. Coyote was already doing the same. They got clear away. They joined up some time later.

“Brother, you are very smart, indeed,” said Fox.

“Let’s get out of these women’s clothes,” said Coyote.

{
Karok and Yurok
}

Coyote went to visit a village where the Indians were having a feast. There was much deer, fish, and acorns to eat and they were planning to have a big dance. There were, however, two girls who were very beautiful but who had never joined the other Indians at a dance, and who lived alone on a nearby hill. Everyone had tried to get the girls to come to the dance, but had failed. Coyote was told about the girls, and he said that he would get them to come down.