An Illicit Pursuit (8 page)

Both of them jump at the sight of the
skin-and-bones girl with only handful of hair on her head and a
generous amount of beard and a mustache on her face. “Gross,”
Brendie screams and her facial muscles tighten, as though she’s
watching a horror movie.

“What happened to her?” Nikki asks.

“Well, if you don’t eat, your body stops
producing hormones. So, basically you become some sort of a man.
Once you’re too deep in it, you can’t eat anymore. Your body won’t
be able to accept any food after not digesting any normal-sized
meal for a long time. You’ll eventually stop growing and start
getting uglier, like an eighty-year-old man. Do you want to end up
like her?” I ask to Brendie. She’s still paralyzed with shock.

“Of course not. But, the girls in my class
tell me I’m fat.” Brendie says, looking ready to burst into
tears.

I think I took the scaring tactic a little
too far. “Gosh, they’re just a bunch of jealous bitches. Don’t pay
any attention to what other girls say, because they either don’t
know what boys really like or just want to make you feel bad. You
know what boys like?” I don’t wait for them to answer. “They like
big boobs. And you won’t get big boobs if you don’t eat. They also
like—”

The knock on the door cuts me off, and we all
turn to see Adam standing at the doorway, frowning. “Is this some
kind of a secret, girls-only meeting?”

I stroll toward the door. “No. Just chatting.
We’re actually done.”

“Can you show us how to play the guitar?”
Brendie asks.

“Sure. Let’s go downstairs, and I’ll reveal
to you some of my secret tricks.”

Adam stands in front of me, blocking my way.
“Can I talk to you first?”

I nod and turn to the girls. “I’ll meet you
in the backyard in five, okay?”

They nod and head toward the door. “Don’t let
him touch anything in the room,” Nikki says, before closing the
door behind us.

“I’m sorry,” I begin, hoping he didn’t hear
my stupid talk, but I guess he did. “I know I should have minded my
own business and kept my mouth shut.”

Adam sits on the bed, no emotion readable on
his face, and taps the space next to him, gesturing me to sit. I do
as he wants and sit beside him, maybe a little too close.

“How much of what you said is true?” he
asks.

“Depends how much you heard.”

“Everything,” he says.

“Everything? Oh, God.” I wince, trying to
remember what I said. “I didn’t puke regularly. Just did it once to
see how it was and backed off on the spot.”

“So, no one called you ‘eau de
dumpster?’”

I laugh and cover my mouth to keep my
laughter under control, shaking my head no as an answer. He seems
to restrain himself for a little while, but soon bursts into
laughter with me.

“I hope the part about your age being
seventeen was a lie, too.”

My laughter subsides, and I inhale a deep
breath and with it Adam’s musky scent, too. Ah, heaven. “How old do
I look like?”

“That’s a trap question.”

“Answer me.” I cross my arms over my chest,
tilt my head a little back, as I watch him think through his
answer.

“Well, you don’t look thirty to begin with. I
guess anywhere between seventeen and twenty one.”

I tap at his shoulder. “Nice save.”

“Will you tell me how old you are, so I know
if I can legally date you?” His face is both serious and playful,
his voice so sexy, his smell so mind blowing, it gets under my
skin, into my veins, down to my hips, urging me with the desire to
have a thorough rub between my legs.

“You don’t need the law telling you whether
you can date me or not. It’s me who has to decide.”

“Does that mean you’re not completely
discarding that possibility yet?”

I glance at the bed we’re sitting on,
fantasizing about having him rub me down there and maybe doing some
more, so I can get him out of my system and completely discard that
possibility he’s mentioning.

He parts his lips, moistening them with his
tongue, his eyes roaming around my lips, then down to my throat,
and to my breasts. I gasp and freeze, as if it’s his hands that are
examining me and not his eyes. He’s doing it to push me to my
limits, clearly enjoying his little game of seduction. If I don’t
act soon his lips will land on mine, and then there won’t be any
turning back.

I mentally force myself to focus on Zach, how
much he must be suffering through his father’s, to avert my
attention from Adam’s hungry eyes. Still, it takes every ounce of
self-restraint not to melt in his gaze and let him wrestle me on
this bed.

“Let’s go. The girls must be waiting,” I
manage to say at last and get up, before it’s me who jumps on him
and not the other way around.

“Show me the pictures you showed the girls
first, then we can go.”

“Oh, those. I’m not sure it’s a good idea.
I’m not comfortable with the notion of you seeing my childhood
pictures.”

“Come on, how bad can they be?”

I saw that question coming. Why does he
always have to insist on what he wants?

“Like really, really bad,” I say. “Didn’t you
hear how your sisters screamed when they saw them?”

“I’m their older brother. I have to know
everything they do or look at.”

“Are you series? Man, I’m glad you’re not my
brother.”

“I’m glad for that fact, too.” He pursues his
lips to keep himself from smiling, but he’s not succeeding it.

I turn my attention down to my phone, going
through the pictures, and find the family picture I showed earlier.
“Here.” I sit back on the bed to show him the picture.

“You looked cute.”

I roll my eyes. “Right.”

“Why did you overeat?” he asks, without
taking his gaze away from the picture. It’s kind of annoying seeing
him examining the little me.

“Because I was sad. When my parents divorced,
it was like they divorced me, too. I missed the Sunday brunches we
used to do together. I wasn’t the center of their attention
anymore. Not just that, they withdrew gradually from me. Things got
worse when both re-married. I felt like I lost both my parents. If
they knew what was going in my mind, they’d probably have tried to
change, to give me more love. But, they didn’t even try.”

He moves his hand between us on the bed, but
for some reason not far enough to touch me. His features soften,
not anymore glare-seducing me. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thank you.” I shrug. “That’s why it’s
important to communicate with Nikki and Brendie. You or your
parents should know what’s going through their minds. You have to
find the core of their problems. Maybe they’re not happy because of
not having the same attention they used to have before Grace’s
illness. Or worse, maybe they think Grace will die and things will
never be the same again. You have to talk to them openly and assure
them that Grace is strong and healthy and will live a long life.
And even if the day of her death comes, say that you’ll still stick
together as a family and never leave them alone. Perhaps that’s
what they need to hear. I don’t know.”

His eyes fall on the floor. “Now, I’m
thinking you must be fifty for being so wise.”

“Well, thank you.” I shake my head,
grinning.

“Seriously, I need to know your age.”

“I’ll turn nineteen in two weeks. Happy?”

“Couldn’t be happier. How about the other
picture? The one of your friend with the mustache and beard?”

“Here it is. She’s not my friend, though. I
just made it up. I found the picture from the internet when I was
googling eating disorders.” This time I hand him my phone, watching
his reaction.

“Oh, wow.” He pulls his eyebrows together.
“That’s really sad.”

“Yeah, I know. An eating disorder is no fun.
My case wasn’t very serious, though, but I got to know some girls
who were in really terrible conditions.”

“Did you recover with therapy?”

“Kind of.” I fling my eyes away from his, or
he’ll see I’m not being honest, and then he’ll insist and I’ll have
to tell him how sex helped me out. He doesn’t need to know that.
From the little time I’ve gotten to know him, I can say with
certainty that he won’t allow his sisters to hang around with boys
even if it might help them. And, anyway I must be the only one who
got that benefit from sex.

“How did you figure it out about my sisters?”
Adam asks.

“You just need to pay attention to people.
Most of them are easy to read.”

“Is that so? Maybe one day you’ll tell me
about your observations about me?”

Taking my phone from his hand, I get up to my
feet and head to the door. “Maybe.”

He holds me from the elbow on the stairs to
stop me and asks, “How about the part about your gagging reflex?
Did it really stop working?”

“Why do you want to know?” I frown. Obviously
he knows the answer, since I already told him I fingered my throat
just for one time.

“It can bring certain advantages.”

“Such as?”

“Such as when you want to insert large
objects into your mouth.”

My eyes pop out at his suggestion. “You’re a
major asshole,” I say the last word in whisper and hurry down the
stairs.

Back in the living room, I get sidetracked by
Grace, who asks me to play the piano. I nod, smiling, and sit on
the chair in front of the black Bösendorfer and start playing and
singing more songs. Eleanor comes with Adriana and both sit on the
couch beside their parents. A picture-perfect sight. The twins pull
chairs beside me and join me singing. Adam stands by the piano, his
eyes drilling holes in my face. It takes every bit of concentration
to keep playing and not get distracted by his captivating gaze.

Large objects?
Oh, dear god!

After singing maybe seven songs, I grab a
chair with the twins in the backyard to show them some basics of
how to hold the guitar and hit a few strings. Adam joins us, too.
Of course he won’t neglect his duty of shadowing me throughout the
day.

I help Nikki place her fingers on the neck of
the guitar and show her how to hold the pick. I notice her hands
shake but encourage her to continue trying, even though she doesn’t
bend the strings that well.

Adam takes over the guitar after Nikki. I
help him only briefly for curling his fingers correctly on the
strings to keep our physical interaction to bare minimum. He
doesn’t try to seduce me with his eyes or words, instead genuinely
focuses on the guitar. Even so, the sounds coming from the guitar
when he hits the strings grate my ears to death, and I cringe. The
girls cover their ears and begin booing at him jokingly.

Adam hands me back the guitar, looking every
bit defeated. “I guess you need to have sausage fingers to be able
to play it well,” he says, half serious, half joking.

“Excuse me?” I glare. “Did you just call us
fat?”

Nikki glares at him. “Fat? Us? Take a good
look at yourself. Your hair always looks greasy, even right after
the shower. Your eyebrows are too thick. You’ve got hair on your
chest, and your feet are too big.”

I cover my mouth as I chuckle, but there is
no way to conceal my eyes roaming down to the wrinkled area under
his belt. It gets worse when my eyes widen at the sight of the
bulge outlined in his jeans.

Oh, my!

I close my eyes, as if they’ve been exposed
to hot steam, and turn away to hide my embarrassment, hoping at
least the girls didn’t notice my reaction because I know Adam did.
I didn’t miss how his eyes darkened at that brief glance before I
closed my eyes.

“Yeah, go get a haircut or something. Your
hair is gross,” Brendie says, releasing the tension somewhat.

“You girls are being rude.” Adam says. “I’ll
get something to drink. You want some, too, Pat?”

I snap my eyes open but just gaze down at the
guitar in my lap. “What? Uh, no. I’m fine.”

I’m so embarrassed for being caught glancing
at Adam’s crotch that I don’t even have the nerve to watch him go.
I take a deep breath and continue showing the girls some more basic
insights about playing guitar.

When the twins start getting visibly bored, I
check the time on my phone. Five before five. How quickly the time
has flown away. I gather my guitar, place it inside its suitcase,
and head back inside the house with the girls.

After I thank Grace for the invitation and
hug her—yeah, I love that lavender scent of hers—Adriana calls me
into the kitchen and hands me an envelope. “You made the party just
perfect. Thanks for coming to our rescue in the last minute.”

I open the envelope to see a
five-hundred-dollar check. “I can’t accept this. It didn’t feel
like work at all. I came to the party as a friend of Adam. I really
can’t take this.”

I attempt to give her back the envelope, but
she shoves my hand away. “Oh, please. Take it.”

“You’re putting me in a terrible position. I
can’t. It’s too much money, anyway.”

“Um, how about this? Would you consider
giving Nikki and Brendie guitar classes? They play basketball after
school, but some guitar lessons will really help them cope with the
stress of the school and my mother’s health condition.”

“Yeah, I’d love to. They seemed to enjoy it.
We can give it a try.”

“Then, accept the check as the advance
payment for the first few classes. We can talk about the details
during your next visit.”

“In that case—” I shrug and shove the
envelope with the check in my purse. “—I’ll see you next time.”

I thank her for the meal and say goodbye to
everyone else, before Adam escorts me out. Opening the door of the
passenger’s seat, I toss the guitar in the car and then turn to say
goodbye to Adam. “Thanks for convincing me to come to the party
today. I had a great time with your family.”

“With my family, but not with me?” He arches
an eyebrow, his eyes roaming back and forth between my lips and
eyes. He won’t give up on trying to seduce me.