Anathema (33 page)

For the rest of his life, Matt would remember how this moment felt: the way his blood seemed to freeze in his veins, then pulsed to his feet, leaving his vision swimming. Time slowed to a standstill. He could hear the oil sizzling, Luca clearing his throat, Hannah sipping her coffee. Every muscle in his throat spasmed, and he couldn’t force out a word.

With a supreme effort, Matt got his tongue to work. “Trudy, calm down.”
Stand back. Think this through.
It was up to him to rescue his daughter. What would he do if he got a call about a missing child? “When did you see her last?”

“She was coloring on the porch. About half an hour ago.”

“When did you notice she was missing?” He was aware of Luca and Hannah looking at him with wide eyes.

“I called her for breakfast. When she didn’t come, I yelled again, then went to the porch. I couldn’t find her anywhere. She’s not in the barn either.”

Matt forced himself not to react, to hold his composure. “I’ll be right there. I’ll call headquarters.”

He turned his back on the Schwartzes and called Captain Sturgis. He promised to send out a deputy to meet him at his grandmother’s. When Matt slipped his phone onto his belt, he turned to face Hannah and Luca. “My daughter is missing. I’ve got to go.”

Hannah put her hand to her mouth. “I’ll come with you.”

He needed all the help he could get. Caitlin needed to be found quickly. She was more important than his reputation with Hannah. “Thanks.”

“I will come also,” Luca said. “Will you drive us?”

“I’ll get Asia too. We ’ll round up other friends to help search. Maybe she wandered off.”

Matt’s eyes burned unexpectedly. He ’d heard about the way the Amish rallied around folks in need, even those who weren’t part of their church, but this was the first time he ’d seen it firsthand. “Thanks,” he mumbled, unable to get out more than that.

Hannah sprang for the steps. “Asia, Sarah, come now. We need to help look for Matt’s five-year-old daughter.”

Hearing the words spoken out loud by someone else was almost as painful as hearing them the first time. A missing child. Every parent’s night-mare. He’d been on the other end a time or two—the deputy talking to parents in such a situation. He should have been more compassionate, more sympathetic. Now he knew what it was like to hear the world shatter in a moment.

Focus. He had to focus. “The others can follow in Asia’s car. I need to go now,” he told Luca. He called Ajax, and the dog came running.

“I’m ready.” The other man grabbed his black hat and slapped it over his Dutch boy haircut.

Luca followed Matt to the SUV. Hannah rushed to join them. “Asia will bring Sarah and any others with her.” She got in the front seat with him, and Luca got in the back with the dog.

The tires shrieked in protest when Matt tromped on the gas pedal. It echoed the scream building in his own head—a babbling plea begging God to spare his baby girl. Hannah tried to talk to him, to pray with him, but the words didn’t penetrate the pain blocking out all coherent thought. He knew he should confess everything, but he couldn’t get his mouth to work.

The clouds released a burst of heavy rain. Matt barreled through the downpour to his grandmother’s. As he pulled in the drive, he heard the sound of a siren screaming toward them. Never before had he experienced the way that familiar sound could seem so ominous, a harbinger of personal, devastating pain.

He slammed on the brakes and hurtled from the vehicle into the driving rain. The last time he’d seen her, Caitlin had come running to meet him. Taking the steps in one leap, he flung open the door and rushed into the house.

His grandmother was wrapping sandwiches in the kitchen. “You’ll need these,” she said, thrusting a bag of food into his hand.

As if he could even think about eating until his daughter was safe in his arms. He took the bag but put it on the counter. “Was she upset this morning?”

“Yes. She said she wanted to go home.” Trudy’s voice held censure. She stared at Hannah, then glanced at Matt. Her gaze lingered on Luca standing by the door with his hat in his hands. “What are you thinking to bring one of
them
here?”

Matt didn’t have time for her prejudices. Ajax pressed his nose against his leg and whined. Matt swallowed his turmoil. He had to focus.

Car doors slammed, and moments later a fist pounded on the door. “Sheriff ’s department,” Blake called.

“Come on in,” Matt yelled.

Blake and another deputy joined them in the kitchen. “You okay, buddy?” Blake asked.

“Caitlin’s gone,” he told the deputies.

“Could she have run away?”

“Maybe.” He could only hope and pray that was what had happened and he’d find her dragging her backpack along the road. People around here were decent people. Maybe one would stop and help. The thought of his daughter in this storm was too much to bear.

Matt stepped onto the porch where the toys lay. Her backpack was here too. So much for hoping she ’d run off to find him. Ajax went to the pack and whined. Matt wished he could do the same. The wind blew rain onto the porch, and droplets pummeled him.

Hannah followed him. “She didn’t take her backpack of toys. If she was running away, wouldn’t she take that?”

“That would be my guess.”

“How long has she been here?”

“My sister brought her this morning.” Gina was probably one of the calls he missed. He ’d been too upset to listen to her message, but he ’d better. What if someone took Caitlin and left a message? “I had some messages.” He pulled out his cell phone and called up his voice mail. Both were from Gina saying she was going to go talk to Vanessa. She asked him to go get Caitlin from Trudy’s.

He put his cell phone away and glanced at Hannah. Confession trembled on his tongue. But nothing would be gained by causing that uproar now. It would only take the focus off finding his daughter. He made himself go through her backpack. It contained only her doll, Jenny, and the doll’s clothing.

“If someone took her, wouldn’t they be likely to take her toys to keep her quiet?” Hannah asked.

Reece would. Matt realized he had to tell the truth for law enforcement to be able to help him. He had to tell them to put out an APB for Reece. And to do that, he had to tell them why.

twenty-three

“The life of the Amish is summed up with the Amish Sunshine
and Shadows Quilt. They are taught to accept whatever comes
from God’s hand—good or bad.”

—HANNAH SCHWARTZ,

IN
The Amish Faith Through Their Quilts

T
he storm battered against the house while thunder boomed overhead. Hannah gazed out across the yard at the black clouds. The porch was little protection. The little girl surely shouldn’t be out in this. She wanted to help Matt, to comfort him in some way, but she understood that nothing could bring solace but finding his little girl. Even though she still believed she might have a daughter out there, she also believed the child was with a family that loved her. The picture had shown a happy, smiling child. Hannah had no sense that the girl was in danger, that someone might have taken her.

Matt was looking at her strangely. His gaze held a plea she wasn’t sure how to read. And the twist of his lips almost made her think he was defiant about something. “Is there anything I can do, Matt?” she asked when he just stared without saying anything.

“I have to show you something,” he said. His voice trembled. He dug into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. Flipping through the photo section, he stopped and stared at a picture. He tugged it from its sleeve and handed it to Hannah.

“This is Caitlin?” Hannah asked as she took the picture.

“This is my daughter.” He put the emphasis on the word
my
.

Such a proud and loving father. Hannah glanced at the picture. And froze. The little girl smiling back at her with her arms around Ajax could have been herself at five. Auburn ringlets cascaded down Caitlin’s back, and her golden brown eyes smiled as much as her lips. Hannah’s gaze traced the familiar features, the happy smile as she looked with love at whoever was taking the picture. Probably her father.

“You’ve had her all along,” Hannah whispered. “All this time when I’ve been looking for her. You lied to me.”

It was all clear in an instant. All those times she ’d asked him for help. All those times he ’d listened to her fears about whether it might be true she had a daughter. He could have set her mind at ease so easily. All he would have had to say was that he had a child who looked like that. Why the lie? Unless he’d adopted her. But then he could have just said he adopted her. But maybe he didn’t know who the mother was. Her thoughts jumbled wildly, nothing making sense.

Matt’s voice was low. “I know, and I’m sorry. It’s torn me up inside. But we’ll have to talk about it later. For now, we have to pull together to find her. I think Reece took her.”

Hannah gasped and put her hand to her mouth. But why, if Caitlin was Matt’s own child? “But why would he take your child? Unless he thought he could convince me she was mine?” The thought of that precious little girl in Reece ’s control made tiny beads of perspiration break out on her forehead.

He raked his hand through his hair. “I didn’t want to get into all this, but you have to be on board with me. We ’ve got to get everyone looking for Reece.” Matt drew a deep breath. “I think he put her on my doorstep five years ago. My wife and I tried for years to have a baby, but we learned she could never conceive. One night we heard something at the door. Analise opened it and found a baby in a carrier.”

“She’s not yours?” The ramifications began to seep into her consciousness.

Matt was still talking in a monotone. “Caitlin seemed heaven-sent. With my position in the sheriff ’s department, we were able to pull some strings and adopt her without turning her over to Child Protective Services. The pediatrician estimated she was only hours old, not more than a day or two.”

A day or two. Hannah couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Could Reece really have taken her baby and just deposited her on a doorstep? Yes, he could. He was capable of anything. “She—she’s mine?” Hannah couldn’t breathe for fear this might be a dream. Joy vied with terror.

“I suspect so. I don’t know for sure.”

“Could she belong to someone else?”

He hunched his shoulders. “Why would she be put on my doorstep? Reece had a connection to me.”

Hannah studied the photo again. “She looks just like the picture Reece sent me.” Her gaze traced the smooth roundness of the child’s cheeks, the gentle curve of her lips. “She ’s beautiful.”

“Yes, she is.” Matt’s voice held anguish. “We have to find her.” He disappeared inside.

Through the screen door, Hannah heard him telling his suspicions to the other deputies. Through a fog of confusion, she was aware they were calling for more help, putting out a warrant for Reece. With the thunder rolling over her and the lightning flashing overhead, a bubble of disbelief surrounded her. This couldn’t be happening. She ’d begun to love Matt, to trust him. He’d proven to be no different from Reece. He wore a smiling mask that hid the true man. And now her daughter was in Reece ’s clutches. She shuddered.

She’d tell the deputies Caitlin belonged to her. When she was found, she’d have her daughter and she ’d never have to look Matt Beitler in the face again. She rubbed her forehead. That wouldn’t work. Matt had friends, connections. He had adopted Caitlin. Sorting out the mess would be no easy matter. And if Reece really had Caitlin, finding him might be impossible.

She knew what she had to do. Call Reece and, to rescue Caitlin, go crawling back.

Her cell phone rang. Of course. She didn’t have to look at the caller ID to know who it was. In a dreamlike state, she dug it out of her purse and flipped it open. “Hello, Reece,” she said in as sweet a voice as she could muster. “I’ve been thinking. I want to come home.”

“Wh-what?” Reece ’s voice quivered.

“We ’re attuned to one another. I was sure it was you when the phone rang. You’re right. We have to work things out. I miss you.” It was as if she stood outside herself listening to her lies. God forgive her, but she had to save Caitlin.

“I’m so glad, hon.” His voice grew stronger. “And when you get here, I have a wonderful surprise for you.”

A cold stone formed in her belly. He had Caitlin. An unnatural calm descended on her. She wasn’t the same weak woman Reece once knew. He would find a bitter adversary. And she would protect Caitlin with her life.

“Where should we meet?” she asked in a soft and low voice that was sure to attract Reece.

“I’ll pick you up at the coffee shop. Have your Asian friend drop you off and leave us alone. No tricks,” Reece said as though he suddenly thought she was setting a trap.

Hannah didn’t intend to tell anyone what she planned. The safest thing for Caitlin would be for her to go in alone, then slip out with the child the minute Reece went out to the store or to work. The problem would be that Reece might expect a lot from her until that time. A real marriage. He’d always had a strong sex drive. The thought of him touching her made bile rise in her throat, but she forced it back. She could do this. She had to do it.

“That sounds wonderful.”

“What’s brought about this sudden change of heart?” Suspicion vibrated in his voice.

“Being with my family, being back where we met. It brought all the love back.” The words nearly gagged her, but she put tenderness into them.

“I should have made sure you stayed in touch, then.” He chuckled then, a self-satisfied sound.

“I’ve missed you. I can’t wait to see you. When can you come get me?”

“I—I’ve got something to take care of. Your surprise. Give me two hours. Don’t be late,” he said.

“I’ll be early,” she said. She put her phone away. Somehow she had to slip away without raising suspicion. Get her things from the house, get to the coffee shop. In a fog, she went inside and listened as Matt barked out orders. Every time he looked at her, she glanced away.