Angel in the Shadows (18 page)

“Sorry, I can’t do that,” he said, his voice gentle, almost apologetic.

She didn’t believe for a second that he was sorry for what he’d done. And even if he was, she didn’t want his apology. The only thing she wanted was for him to be gone.

“I have to get dressed. Do you mind?”

“As a matter of fact, I do mind. Besides, it’s not like I haven’t already seen you naked. Not that impressive. Now get dressed. You’ll miss your plane.”

The mention of a plane almost overwhelmed the stinging barb about her body. Almost. That struck hard and hurt far worse than she was prepared to admit. And to hear it from him . . . God, how could she have been so dumb?
Oh, the bastard.

“What are you talking about? You didn’t say anything about a plane,” she replied, her heart racing wildly at the mere idea of flying.

“You didn’t ask. Not that it matters much,” he said with a shrug. “Now do you want to get dressed yourself or shall I help you?”

She wanted him out of here, away from her but it was obvious that he had no intentions of leaving. The only choice she had was to get dressed with him watching her because she sure as hell didn’t want him helping her. She didn’t want him anywhere near her. Damn him!

Pushing her insecurities aside as much as she could, she resolutely dropped the blankets to the floor and stomped over to the dresser, trying not to care that he watched as she leaned over removing the clothes from the open drawers. Even with her back to him, she imagined she could feel the weight of his gaze as she pulled on jeans and a tee shirt. Not even glancing in his direction, she hoped to wound him somehow with her own indifference. But when she turned around, he was staring off in a completely different direction, not looking at her all.

Feeling even angrier at this show of disregard, she stormed over to the small walk-in closet and grabbed a heavy coat and turned to him, arms crossed over her chest in a show of defiance.

“I am not getting on a plane,” she said through clenched teeth.

“Oh yes you are. Your sister will be waiting for you so you better not disappoint her.”

“My sister?” Madison asked, at once alarmed. “You called Rachel?”

“Yes, I did. Would you rather I have called your mother or father?”

“No. But you shouldn’t have called anyone. You have no right.” Narrowing her eyes, she tried to burn a hole right through him.

“Well, I just figured since your leaving New York, you might as well go somewhere you’d enjoy being,” Seth replied almost graciously.

“You figured wrong. I won’t enjoy being there.” God, how she hated him right now.

With an expression of feigned confusion, Seth said, “Oh, you mean you don’t like being around your sister?”

The sarcasm in his voice was enough to make her want to scratch his eyes out. She might have tried it if she thought she could get away with it. Her anger was rising more and more by the minute.

Struggling to keep her emotions in check, she replied, “Of course I like Rachel! That’s not what I meant. I only meant . . . Damn it! It doesn’t matter what I meant. I am not leaving New York,” she finished heatedly.

With a regretful grimace, Seth said, “I’m afraid you have no choice in the matter. It’s already been decided.”

“Decided? Decided by who?” Madison demanded.

“By me. I had to make sure that you got somewhere safe.”

“Wait just a minute. Why do you care so much if I’m safe or not? You said you didn’t care about me.”

Other than a slight twitch of his lips, his bland expression remained exactly the same.

“I don’t care about you. Stop grasping for straws, Maddie, it’s not very becoming,” he chastised. “I told you Vance is a sadistic fuck. You
will
get hurt if he gets his hands on you. And regardless of my mission, it’s not my intention for innocent people to get hurt. You included.”

“Oh, so you don’t like innocent people to get hurt?” she said, her voice sharp and cutting. “What about Robert? He was completely innocent and you gunned him down like a common criminal.” The pain and anger made her throat catch painfully on Robert’s name and she struggled against the immediate burn of tears, not all of which were for her slain friend.

Shrugging, he said nonchalantly, “That was unfortunate but he got in my way and I had no choice. And now, neither do you. Let’s go.” Without waiting for her angry retort, he turned his back on her and left the room.

Seth was pulling on his own heavy coat when she came into the living room. He walked over to the door and opened it for her. Screwing up all of her anger, she moved past him, careful not to brush up against him, her eyes fixed straight ahead. The Explorer sat in the front yard, its engine running and soft white clouds of exhaust escaping. For a split second, she thought about trying to run. But he was fast, lightning quick and he would catch her before she even got to the garage door. And that would mean he would have his hands on her, his strong arms wrapped around her, holding her . . .

He yanked the door open. “Get in, Maddie,” Seth said roughly as she hesitated.

“Don’t call me Maddie. In fact, don’t even talk to me,” she retorted hatefully but climbed in before he tried to force her. The thought of his hands on her continued to send a volley of mixed emotions running through her.

“As you wish,
my dear
,” he responded sharply.

Without another word, he slammed the door, walked around the front of the vehicle, and climbed in the driver’s seat. He shifted into ‘reverse,’ stomping the gas pedal down hard. She reached out grasping the dashboard as they spun around wildly in the snow. Within seconds, they were barreling down the driveway at alarming speed. She didn’t even bother glaring at him, knowing it would have no reaction. Instead, she sat as far away from him as she could, practically gluing herself to the door. She felt as cold inside as the snow and ice they were driving through even as the heater blasted warm air over her body. They reached the main highway quickly and although he drove too fast, she had no doubt that he would get her to the airport safely.

She refused to look at him, not really caring where they went anymore. Closing her eyes, she leaned her forehead against the coolness of the glass, trying not to cry. She didn’t want him to see just how much he’d hurt her. She didn’t want to give him a complete victory.

Everything she knew was gone, replaced with confusion and uncertainty. Robert was dead and she was in love with his killer. There was no fooling herself. She knew what she felt. She loved him. Loved him completely. But how could she possibly be in love with someone like him? Everything about Seth was irrevocably wrong. He was so wrong, hell, it screamed at her. She’d have to be blind not to see it. But despite what her eyes told her, being with him felt so right, so good. And it wasn’t just the sex, which was incredible.
He
felt right to her, good to her.

She didn’t even have any illusions about him. She saw him clearly for what he was, who he was. A ruthless assassin, a hired killer. But he was also beautiful, justified, irresistible. There were definite reasons behind his actions, however obscure they may be. She had glimpsed into the darkness of his soul and accepted it, accepted
him
. Her mind and heart were at war and a part of her was going to lose either way. She just wasn’t sure which one could survive when defeated.

Not that any of it mattered much. It was a one-way street. He didn’t love her, he had said so himself, and she saw it in his eyes when he looked at her. For him, it was just as he had said, sex, a simple fuck, nothing more. But for her, it had been more, so much more.

Damn him! The murdering bastard had her heart whether he wanted it or not.

Vance was taking his breakfast in his well-lit study, listening to the soft, powerful chords of Bach’s “Double Symphony” when he got the first call about his business partner’s fatal accident. One after another, he answered the dozen or so phone calls from friends, business associates, and reporters, making the customary condolences in hushed tones solely reserved for the deceased. He portrayed the perfect amount of shock and regret over the sudden loss of Jonathan Harrison as he calmly ate his eggs Benedict and considered the more intricate details of his plans.

Over the next few weeks and months, his ingenious ideas would come to a head and things would begin to happen. And happen fast. He’d been assured that everything would be ready to go by the deadline and that there were no problems what so ever. Once the poison was released into the water system, the first symptoms of the “illness” would take effect within twenty-four to forty-eight hours. Without his miracle cure, they would all perish. A pity he wouldn’t be around to witness the first few casualties. By the time things really began to happen, he was going to be safely nestled in his cabin high in the Colorado mountains.

He’d visited the two-story cabin frequently throughout the year, sometimes for several months at a time. Sometimes to hunt, sometimes to fish, sometimes just to relax. But more than that, the remote location was perfect for other more pleasant activities. The absolute privacy allowed him to indulge in his ever-growing fantasies. Fantasies that were becoming more urgent and violent. This obvious decline in his fetishes gave him pause but only momentarily. He would have what he wanted. And what he wanted right now was Madison Sinclair. Unbeknownst to her, she would be joining him on this particular trip to his cabin. The things he was going to do to her raced through his mind at alarming speed. So many things to do, so many ways to do it. A pleasant warmth began to spread through his groin. Pushing those thoughts away for the time being, he focused more on the present and the course of action he needed to take.

The fact that Madison had escaped him this long was disturbing and his dark desires would not be put off much longer. He needed her now. Well, it was time to cover all of his bases. Perhaps he should make a call to Madison’s younger sister. It was always possible that his little photographer had decided to make a last-minute trip to Chicago to visit family.

The music behind him suddenly hit a crescendo. A good omen. Gulping down the remaining orange juice, he shoved the chair back with a loud screech. Resolutely he strode directly into his office and pulled the small black book from the top drawer of his massive desk. Flipping through the pages neatly lined with numbers and addresses, he easily found what he was looking for. Picking up the phone, he punched in the numbers and listened to the ringing on the other end. Surely Rachel would have no problem helping a business associate of Madison’s to locate her.

“Hello,” the young voice of a child replied after the third ring.

“Hello. Is your mommy or daddy home by chance?” Vance asked, using his most charming voice. He despised children but when push came to shove, he could play the part of a caring adult.

“No. They went to the airport to get Aunt Maddie. She’s coming to visit,” the child answered happily.

“Well, isn’t that nice?” Vance replied. Before he could say anything else, he heard a more adult voice in the background. “Tommy! You know you’re not supposed to answer the phone.” Vance could hear the rustle as the phone exchanged hands.

“Hello? Can I help you?” the young female voice asked politely.

Vance relished the fact that the only thing she got for an answer was a dial tone. He had been right. The little bitch was running home with her tail between her legs. With a wide smile, he felt himself grow hard and he couldn’t help but think that he had something to put between her legs. Over and over and over.

Chapter 21

The Albany International Airport stood tall against the snowy New York skyline, an intricate design of red brick and glass. Seth had slid recklessly on the icy roads to get them here, causing the snow-laden trees to fly by in an alarming blur. Much like the last few days, she thought absently. If he had ever touched the brakes, she hadn’t been aware of it. But once inside the city, he managed to maintain some semblance of the speed limit, apparently opting for discretion rather than blatant recklessness. He was totally unapologetic in his driving, remaining absolutely silent for the entire trip, which was just fine with her.

She refused to let herself think as Seth led her to the boarding gate at the far end of the airport. If she did, she would scream. Or cry. Or something totally crazy that would most likely get her tackled by airport security. And she’d been manhandled enough as of late.

“Here, take this,” Seth said, finally speaking to her. He shoved a large wad of money at her. When she refused to take it, he grabbed her wrist and turned it over, shoving the bills into her hand. “This should be more than enough for a couple of months provided you don’t go on some wild shopping spree.”

Dumbfounded, Madison stared at the money. “A couple of months? I can’t be gone for a couple of months. I have responsibilities here. A job, a cat. Oh my gosh, Milo! I can’t leave him here.” In the midst of other things, she’d completely forgotten about him. The poor thing was probably starving and royally pissed. She couldn’t just leave him to fend for himself.

“Your cat? That’s what you’re worried about right now?” Seth asked incredulously.

“Well excuse me for having feelings,” she snapped. “Not all of us are able to just cast something off whenever we feel like it.” She realized that was totally uncalled for and more than a little childish but right now, she didn’t care. She was mad and hurting.

Seth looked at her, his blue eyes dark and pained. “Maddie, I…”

“What?” she asked, interrupting. “Are you going to tell me that you’re sorry, that you didn’t mean to lead me on, didn’t mean to take me to bed last night? That you didn’t mean to kill Robert?” Her voice was beginning to shake with the effort to keep herself calm. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could stand to be here with him.

“No,” he sighed. “I’m not.”

“Then what? What were you going to say?”

Lifting his head, he clenched his teeth before he spoke. “I was going to say not to worry about your job or your cat. Mr. Childers was more than understanding about your sudden resignation. And your neighbor, Mrs. Hawkins is going to take your cat. She’s been rather lonely since her husband died last year so Milo will be good for her.”

“My resignation? Do you know how hard I worked to get that job? And Milo. You just gave him away?!” she yelled. Milo had been her companion, her therapist, her friend and now, just like that, he belonged to someone else. Another loss thanks to this asshole standing in front of her. “How can you be so heartless? How can you not care about anything? How can you not care about me?” Her voice broke, sending her words spiraling into a shattered whisper.

Stepping back, he didn’t say a single word. But he didn’t have to. That one step said it all. He didn’t care. And she was a complete idiot because she did.

With a shake of her head, she turned her back to him and boarded the plane, never looking back. On legs that were less than steady, Madison made her way down the aisle of the plane, each step taking an immense amount of courage she didn’t know she possessed. The rows of blue seats stretched from front to back, three per section. Above them were compartments for the storing carry-on luggage but of course she had nothing save the money Seth had given her before forcing her on this death trap. Small, round windows were cut into the sides of the plane, each one made of crystal clear glass complete with a shutter and all around her, people were finding their seats, stowing their belongings, getting ready for the flight.

The further down the aisle she went, the more anxious she became. The fear grew inside her like a physical thing and all she wanted to do was turn around and run from the plane. But Seth was probably waiting on her to do just that.
Damn him! Damn him to hell!
How could she have ever thought she loved such a cruel man? A selfish and uncaring man? It must have been temporary insanity.

She found her seat only to stop dead in her tracks, unable to take another step. Double-checking the information on her ticket, she prayed she was reading it wrong. She wasn’t. Oh Heaven help her, Seth had gotten her a window seat, right next to the wing of the plane.
The bastard!
Oh God, how she hated him right now. How could he not know about her fear of flying? And now a window seat of all things?

Nearly livid with anger and fear, Madison moved to her seat, practically collapsing into it, her legs unable to hold her up any longer. The seats were surprisingly comfortable and they seemed to fit every contour of her body perfectly. For comfort like this, she could only imagine the price of her ticket. Yep, nothing like flying to your death first class, Madison thought bitterly.

Leaning forward, she peered through the circular window at the world outside. She could see the wide wing of the plane, white and gleaming and the pale gray tarmac still covered lightly with patches of snow. It was warm inside the plane but she would much rather be out there in the freezing cold. That much she could handle. But being on a plane? Oh, this was too much. Oh God, she was going to throw up.

Snapping the window closed, Madison snatched a pamphlet from the back pocket of the seat in front of her, thankful for anything to occupy her mind. Flipping it open, she studied the high color, glossy images but the pictures did nothing to calm her. Inside, people were demonstrating what to do if the plane should crash. The idea of the plane crashing was terrifying enough but what made it even more disturbing was that each and every person boasted a huge, megawatt smile as if they were happy to be falling to the earth at mind shattering speeds. Stuffing the pamphlet back into the seat pocket and closed her eyes, trying to relax.

She had no idea how long she sat there, on the edge of panic before a high chiming sound made her open her eyes. An illuminated sign at the front of the plane indicated the need to fasten the seat belts. Gripping the separate ends of the belt, hands shaking uncontrollably, she managed to snap them tightly into place. She pulled the belt as tight as she could stand it that as if that would really make a difference if the plane decided to take a nosedive.

Abruptly the engine of the plane roared to life and she nearly leapt from her seat. It roared like a massive beast and she could feel the vibrations echoing through her entire body. The deep sound encompassed her, surrounded her, and enveloped her.
Oh God, she was in the belly of the beast.
All her meager
composure disappeared in an instant. Her chest was so tight it felt as though iron bands were clamped around her rib cage, squeezing the very breath from her body. She clasped her hands together tightly, her knuckles turning white with the force of her grip and her breath was coming fast and hard as the plane shuddered, then began to move.

From somewhere nearby came the soft sound of someone whimpering. A desperate noise that was absolutely heart-wrenching and filled with torment. And she thought she had it bad. Glancing around, she was shocked to realize that the low pitched whine was coming from her. Closing her eyes tightly, she inhaled deeply, letting each one out slowly and tried to concentrate on something else, anything else other than the sleek death rocket she was on.

His
face was there, waiting for her. His jet black hair, long and silky. His deep blue eyes, soft as snow, hard as diamonds. His mouth, soft and luscious. And the way he’d looked at her last night in the glow of the candlelight. As if she were the only woman in the entire world for him. She had never felt anything like it. His lovemaking was so intense, so incredible, more than anything she had ever known. The power of his gaze, the raw emotion she had seen there. But it was nothing more than a game to him. She knew that now.

In her mind’s eyes, she saw Seth again, at the airport, dumping her off like she was nothing, like she had meant nothing to him. She had never felt so hurt, so foolish, so terrible in her entire life. Not even when he told her he was the one who had killed her best friend. What on earth did that say about her? What kind of
person
did that make her?

She didn’t have an answer. She only knew that she would never see him again. Would never again hear his soft voice or feel the heat of his skin against hers. Her heart lurched painfully in her chest and tears burned under her eyelids. She was not going to cry, damn it! She was sick to death of crying and she was not going to waste one more tear on that selfish, heartless man. She didn’t want him, didn’t need him. She was on her own from now on. Whatever that may bring.

Seth watched as she turned and walked away from him, his eyes trailing over her golden hair, her soft curves and he felt a stab of regret. He didn’t have time for that. But there it was. He didn’t want her to go but there was no choice. There were more important things to deal with right now other than some stupid, useless emotions. Like the fact that he had at last gotten the go ahead from Charlie.

The Perfect Order’s lab techs had finally broken the code on Vance’s formula and were able to neutralize it. If Vance managed to dump it into the water system as planned, then it would do nothing more than carry with it a slightly bitter taste. There was no chance of death or even an upset stomach. But Vance was not going to be around to give that order. Seth was determined to make sure of that.

This is what he should be concentrating on. Not Madison and the lies he’d told her.

He’d lied of course when he told Madison it was just a fuck. It was far from that. And although he didn’t want to admit it, even to himself, she had struck a nerve in him. One that reverberated each time he looked at her. All he could think of was her absolutely lithe body and her perfect mouth, hot and hungry. The smell and taste of her, the feel of her in his arms as she lay sleeping beside him. The way she smiled, the way she talked. Everything about her sent waves of heat souring to his brain and his heart.

Incredibly, she’d given him one last chance to prove that he wasn’t a bastard. And for her sake, he hadn’t taken it. Instead he’d deliberately stepped back. Such a small gesture. But with that one step, he put the distance of an entire world between them. It took everything he had to pull away and the stricken look in her eyes seared him, cut him down to his soul. The pain was incredible, immense, bigger than anything he’d ever felt before. And now she was gone. Gone from his view, gone from his life.

At last he’d accomplished what he’d set out to do. He made her hate him. He’d gotten rid of her. He should be happy. But he wasn’t. Desolation hit him strong and hard. Like a punch to his gut, to his soul. He never felt more miserable and bleak in his whole wretched life and the loss of her was almost tangible. But that was stupid. How could he feel loss for something that was never his to begin with?

Nearby, a red haired attendant was blatantly staring at him while he stood there, fighting his feelings for Madison. Normally that would be amusing but now it only irritated him. The second the gate snapped shut, she was quick to make her move, walking over to him, her hips swinging in an overabundance of sensuality.

“Hi there,” she purred, her voice warm and sexy. “I’m Layla. It’s my break time and I thought you might want to join me in a cup of coffee.”

He knew women very well and this one was no different. If he went with her, they may start off with coffee but it wouldn’t end there. No, it would continue, possibly in some secret, out of the way room here in the airport where they would have sweaty, heart-pounding sex until he left her screaming for mercy. Then he would go on his merry way, never hearing from her again. Funny how that idea just didn’t appeal to him. He didn’t want anyone but the one he’d just put on that plane. Without another word, he turned and walked away, not giving a damn about Layla’s wounded pride. This place suddenly felt too crowded and the only thing he wanted to do was get out of here.

His mind continued to circle around Madison as he left the airport. Damn it, she was fucking with his mind. And his libido. Hell, he could have had that pretty little redhead at the boarding gate if he’d wanted. A few well place words and they could have been making it even before Madison’s plane had even left the ground. But he didn’t want her, didn’t even have the desire to try. That was an alarming change he wasn’t ok with at all.
Just what in the fuck had she done to him?

He had wanted women before, had taken those women before. Much more beautiful and experienced women and walked away from them with no problems, no regrets. But he was finding it extremely hard to walk away from Madison Sinclair. He was trained to be above all needs and wants, to be able to resist them easily. Take what he wanted and leave it all behind at a moment’s notice. But damn him if he still didn’t find himself thinking about her, wanting to make love to her for hours on end and then slowly begin the process all over again. For the rest of their lives. But this was more than want. It was a need so deep, so total that it bordered on obsession. This maddening, insatiable need was almost a physical ache. How could one woman, especially one like Madison Sinclair, get to him so quickly? Nothing was making sense to him anymore.