Annihilate Me (Vol. 1) (The Annihilate Me Series) (23 page)

But he won’t get a another chance.

“To
a fresh start,” I said.

We
sipped our beers and then he took my hand.
 
“I’m glad you’re here.”

At
that moment, I thought of Lisa.
 
She
would be waiting up for me.
 
“Do you
mind if I send a text to my roommate?
 
She always stays up for me to make sure I get home safe.”

“Of
course.
 
It sounds like you have a
true friend there.”

“Since
fifth grade.
 
Lisa’s my rock.”

I
pulled my cell out of my pocket and sent her a text.
 
“Don’t wait up.
 
I’m with Alex.
 
I know.
 
Close your mouth.
 
Get ready for the stories because
they’re coming.
 
XO.”

By
the time our food came, we were deep in conversation.
 
Alex asked me everything about my job,
and I could tell he wasn’t just going through the motions.
 
He asked a dozen questions, the last of
which made me smile:
 
“How do I shoe
in on that free dinner thing you’ve got going on?”

“You’ll
be competing with Lisa, but I’ll see what I can do.”

“Do
you think she’d mind?”

“Lisa
loves her food, so it’s anyone’s guess.”

“What
does she do?”

“She
writes about zombies.”

“She
writes about what?”

“Zombies.
 
The undead.
 
She’s a novelist and she’s all about
post-apocalyptic worlds and post-mortem flesh.
 
She’s very good.
 
Her first and only book so far, was a
best seller.
 
She is finishing her
new book now.
 
I’m going to proof it
soon.
 
I’m beyond proud of her.”

“I
don’t think I could read about zombies.”

“She
gives them a heart, even if it doesn’t beat.”

He
smiled at me, and I could feel myself slipping away.
 
“Well, whatever you can do about the
free dinner thing....”

“I
think I can fit you in.”

Later,
when we were eating one of the best burgers I’d had in a while, I asked him
about his own work, and if he was able to move forward the way he wanted to.

“Did
Blackwell find someone else for you?”

“No
one replaces you,” he said.
 
“So I
haven’t done so, and I won’t be doing so.
 
But I’m managing.
 
At least
Immaculata isn’t talking to me anymore.
 
That’s a bonus.”

“I
told Blackwell that she should hire her for you.”

“I
know you did, but that isn’t happening.”

“She
was scary.”

“There’s
a reason I hired you.
 
I just didn’t
know what I was walking into.
 
I’m
sorry I behaved the way I did, Jennifer.”

I
deflected his apology.
 
“How’s your
burger?”

“Perfect.
 
Yours?”

“I
think the cow just touched the stove, so it’s perfect.
 
How about your fries?”

“Excellent.
 
Though for some reason—probably
because the chef got a look at you—you got more than I did.”

“It’s
all about portion control,” I said, pushing my dish toward him.
 
“But here.
 
I can’t eat all of this.
 
Dip into my French fry heaven and eat
yourself into oblivion.”
 
I
immediately blushed.
 
“That sounded
dirty.”

He
winked at me.
 
“I know it did.”

“But
that’s not what I meant.”

“Something
subliminal came over you.”

“No,
it didn’t.”

“If
a bookstore was open right now, I’d buy you something by Freud and encourage
you to question what that really meant.”

“I’ve
read Freud.”

He
snatched one of my fries and popped it into his mouth.
 
“Then you know what I’m talking about.”

 
*
 
*
 
*
 

When
he took me home, I saw him look up at my building, and then I saw the concern
on his face when he turned back to me.

“Are
you safe here?”

“I’m
safe.
 
And we won’t be here much
longer.
 
We’re already looking for a
new space.
 
This is what we could
afford when we got here.”

“Where’s
your apartment?”

“Fourth
floor.”

“That’s
got to be hot.”

“We
just bought an air conditioner, so it’s fine now.
 
Before that, my hair had been a hot mess
for most of the summer, so you’re right.
 
It’s been steamy in all the wrong ways.
 
But we Mainers are tough.
 
Even when it comes to that, uh,
particular building.”

“Jennifer—”

“It’s
fine.
 
Lisa and I each have each
other’s backs, and we’re not stupid.
 
We look out for each other.
 
We are nothing if not protective of each other.”

“How
soon before you move?”

“As
soon as we find the right space.”

“Let
me know if I can help.”

“I’ll
do that.”
 
I put my hand on his
knee.
 
“I guess this is it.”

“For
tonight.”

“For
tonight.”

“Thank
you for listening to me.”

I
leaned forward and kissed him full on the mouth.
 
His arms wrapped around me and he pulled
me in tight.
 
Somehow, somewhere
during the night, with all of its trappings, we got to this point.
 
How did that happen so quickly?
 
How did we get here?
 
Is this how a relationship starts?
 
With a rush?
 
With this intense need to not part?
 
I’d never been involved in anything like
this, so I didn’t know.
 
He kissed
me harder, and I knew even less.

His
voice was low when he said, “I wish you were coming home with me.”

“That
would be a little fast.”

“Still.”

“Still,”
I repeated.
 
“This girl is
careful.
 
You’ve probably seen
that.”

“I
probably have.”

“Thank
you for coming tonight, Alex.
 
I’d
written you off.
 
This wasn’t easy
for me.
 
But I’m glad it happened.”

“All
I wanted was for you to hear me out.
 
What happened before will never happen again.”

Would
it?
 
I wasn’t sure.
 
But right now this felt good, and I
needed to savor it instead of questioning it, which is what I always did with
men.

“The
burger was beyond,” I said.
 
“I hope
you liked my French fries.”

“You’re
unbelievable.”

“Do
you look for innuendoes in everything?”

“When
they’re that obvious?
 
Yes, I do.”

“You
seriously need to get some sleep,” I said, kissing him again.
 
And again.
 
And maybe once again.
 
“I’ll see you soon.”

“How
soon?”

“I’ll
let you be the judge of that.”
 
With
a final kiss that tore through me because he intentionally pressed his tongue
against mine, I stepped out of the limo, hurried across the street, pushed my
key into the lock, and stepped inside the building, where I knew Lisa would be
up and lying in wait.

What
the hell was she going to say to me now?

CHAPTER TW
ENTY-SEVEN

When
I walked into the apartment, Lisa was there.
 
Her faithful Kindle was in her hands,
and a cold martini made with the good vodka we now could afford was on the
table next to her.
 
She lowered her
Kindle onto her lap as I moved into the kitchen.
 
I pulled my cell out of my pocket and
put it on the counter.
 
Then I saw
that she was looking straight at me.
 
Just as I knew she would be.

“Well,
well,” she said.

“You
were right.”

“Do
tell.”

I
sat on the sofa and told her about the entire night.
 
I told her about meeting him
unexpectedly at db Bistro, about him pouring out his heart to me, about his
wife’s death, about our late dinner, and all the kissing that happened in
between.

“You’re
in deep now, girl.”

“I
know I am.”

“But
I warned you this was coming.”

“You
were in my head all night.”

“I
also told you that, at some point in your life, you needed to put your trust in
someone, even if they had hurt you once.
 
It happens.
 
But
sometimes—if your gut tells you it’s the right thing to do—you need
to forgive because relationships, sometimes even in their infancy, are
difficult.
 
How was he tonight?”

“He
kept apologizing.
 
Finally, I needed
to stop him.
 
It was genuine.
 
You and I can smell bullshit a farm
away.”

“Nicely
said.
 
I might use that.”
 

“Please
do.
 
It’s the least I can do.”

She
sipped her martini.

“Not
every man is your father, Jennifer.”

“Intellectually,
I know that.
 
Emotionally, I’ve got
a lot of work to do when it comes to accepting that.”

“When
will you see him again?”

“I
left that up to him.”

“So,
it will be tomorrow, then?”

“It’s
my day off.
 
Anything could
happen.
 
Do you think I made the
right decision?”

“I
know you.
 
You wouldn’t have done
this if you didn’t think it was the right choice.
 
He must be something special if he can
break through your walls.”

“If
this progresses, I’m going to have to tell him at some point.”

“About
what?”

“You
know what.”

“That’s
not going to be easy for you.”

“It’s
not.”

“When
and if the time is right, you’ll know.”

“And
then there’s that other elephant in the room.”

“Oh,
yeah.
 
That.
 
That’s probably going to come up sooner
rather than later if this is going where I think it is.”

“I’m
going to look like an idiot.”

“Really?
 
Because he’s not going to think that way
at all.
 
He’s going to look at you
like you’re his new student.”

In
the kitchen, my cell buzzed.

“Prince
Charming,” Lisa said.
 
“I’m assuming
you’re going to answer this time?”

“That
was a text.
 
Hold on.”

I
went over and read it aloud.
 
“If
you’re free at all this week, would you consider being my date one night?
 
I have events I need to go to all week.
 
Otherwise, it will be difficult to get
away and see you.
 
Let me know,
OK?
 
Maybe tomorrow night?
 
I think you’d especially enjoy tomorrow
night.
 
And I don’t think I can wait
until mid-week.
 
Tonight was wonderful.
 
—Alex.”

“A
date,” Lisa said.
 
“That sounds
nice.”

“Not
that I have anything to wear.
 
I
can’t afford the sort of dress I’d need to wear at one of those events.
 
There’s nothing I can do about that.”

“So,
tell him the truth.
 
You can’t
afford it, but you’re off tomorrow night, so you can meet him afterwards for a
drink somewhere.”