Another Cup of Coffee (34 page)

Jack put down his pint and threw his arms around Kit, ‘No way! That's fantastic. Why didn't you say before?'

‘I've only known a while.' Kit extracted herself from his hug, ‘I wanted to let it sink in. If I announced it to everyone straight away, it might have evaporated.'

‘Well, I'm so proud of you. Tell me all about it.'

It was only after Kit had told Jack all the details of her new contract, they'd had a second drink, and closing time beckoned, that Jack said, ‘It's like Del Amitri's “Always the Last To Know”; Paul liking Amy. I mean, I had no idea, Kit.'

Kit groaned loudly as she grabbed her jacket, ‘No one knew, Jack. Let's face it, honey, we don't even know if Amy knows yet, do we?'

Sixty

January 23
^rd
2007

Oh my God!

Amy's brain struggled to register the reality of the situation as her fingers traced over the words “I love you.” She hadn't been prepared for that. An invitation for another meal. A confession of wanting to go out with her. A hidden lust even; but love? He hadn't seen her for years. It was a shock. It had been a whole day of shocks.

Paul was pretending to study London's nightlife through the window. As Amy watched him, false light from the multitude of restaurants, pubs, and clubs gave the sky a luminous effect, highlighting the outline of his broad back. He was barely moving. His jeans were creased around the thighs from where he'd been sitting for so long. The closely-cut hair at the nape of his neck showed the first speckles of grey.

Could she do this?

She decided not to think. There'd been too much thinking. Too many years wasted hashing over her past, never bothering to consider a future. It was time to be brave. Time to act instinctively. If this man was in love with her after a gap of so many years, then he must be serious, and if he was mistaken she'd soon find out. Amy stood up rather shakily. Carefully she folded the napkin, and placed it reverently into her jacket pocket, before joining Paul at the window.

Slipping a hand into Paul's cool firm grasp, Amy said, ‘It's all a bit frightening isn't it?'

‘It certainly is!' Paul looked down at her, glowing with both relief and joy as he increased the pressure around Amy's soft skin. ‘A cab for two, then?'

A sensation of contented happiness flooded through Amy as she felt his hand close around hers.

‘Come on,' she said, ‘take me home.'

January 24
^th
2007

When Amy turned her mobile back on the following morning, the crescendo of beeps alerted her to the arrival of a barrage of text messages.

‘Good grief!' Sarah exclaimed as she stuffed a piece of wholemeal bread into the toaster, ‘You're popular this morning.'

‘More last night, I think,' Amy said as she scanned down the eight messages, ‘Oh, and yesterday afternoon as well.'

‘You got a secret admirer?' Sarah teased as she put on her jacket, ready to dash out of the front door as soon as her toast was buttered.

‘Well, yes actually! Although it's not a secret anymore.' Amy's eyes sparkled as she spoke, making Sarah very sorry that she was already late for work, and couldn't stay to fish for juicy details. ‘I'll tell you about it later.'

The first three messages had been sent yesterday, and were all from Jack. Initially asking if she was free for coffee, and then wondering where she was, and lastly, whether she was OK?

The next was from Kit, asking if she'd had a nice evening, and ditto from that lying bastard Rob, who in the light of things, Amy had decided to forgive for pretending to be ill.

The remaining three were from Paul, and had all been fired off, one after another, between seven and eight o'clock that morning.

Hope you slept well, little one. xxx

You working today? Might come in to say hi? xxxx

Do you like chilli? Thought I'd make one tonight, fancy sharing it? xxxxx

Amy smiled at the increasing number of kisses with each text. He can't have slept much at all. But then, neither had she. Strange that she didn't feel tired, just kind of high. She replied.

What's sleep?! Am working, but u better not come, u'll distract me!! Love chilli - looking forward to it, v much xxxxx

Amy and Paul had arrived back at Princes Road a little after midnight. Carrying on their suddenly endless supply of chatter, they'd sat opposite each other at Amy's dining table, arms stretched across its white painted surface, holding hands as they filled in some of the blanks in each other's lives, until it was almost three o'clock in the morning. After many ‘I should really be goings,' Paul had finally made a convincing effort to make a move towards home, when Amy asked the question she desperately needed an answer to. She'd played what she wanted to ask around her head as they'd talked, contemplating putting what needed saying off until tomorrow, but found she couldn't. ‘Before you go, there's something I have to know.'

‘Yes?' Noting the uncertain edge to her voice, Paul perched back on the edge of his seat and listened.

Amy wasn't quite brave enough to look at Paul as she spoke, ‘Love. It's a big word. Are you sure?'

‘I'm positive.' He spoke with such firmness that Amy wasn't sure whether to press the subject or not, but this was important.

‘But when? When did you first start feeling like this?'

Paul sat down properly and took a deep breath, ‘It started that day when Rob and I took you out of the excavation in Wales for a coffee stop in Caldicot. Do you remember?'

‘Oh yes,' her brother's tape flashed through Amy's mind, ‘my birthday. That has got to be the best coffee stop I've had. Ever.'

Paul grinned as he recalled that day, ‘The expression on your face when the café owner stuck candles into those cupcakes. I remember thinking how amazing it could be to have the look of love you gave Rob and I all to myself.'

‘But you didn't say anything?' Amy watched him intently now.

‘I wasn't ready. There was too much fun to be had, and too many temptations. I didn't recognise my feelings for what they were until later. Sorry.'

‘No need to be,' Amy lay a hand lightly on his arm, ‘we were so young.'

‘The idea of you sort of nagged away at the back of my head after that, but then you met Jack and I dismissed it. You were my friend, and that was enough. Until he started hurting you. Then, watching you cry, seeing you withdraw into yourself. I knew how I felt then, and I've never felt so fucking helpless in my life.'

‘But you said nothing.' Speaking steadily, Amy squeezed Paul's hand in her soft grip, ‘You should have said.'

‘You were a mess, Amy.' He spoke gently. ‘You wouldn't have heard me if I had told you. You wouldn't have noticed if I'd written it in neon pen across my forehead. Don't you remember how you were?'

Amy cringed at the image of her pathetic former self. Ashamed of her inability to cope, her lack of pride.

‘I held you so many times as you cried into my shoulder.'

‘Your jumper always smelt of lanolin and cheap conditioner.' Amy felt like sobbing into his shoulder all over again.

‘Did it?' Paul was surprised, he'd never noticed.

‘Yes. The blue one. It was all chunky, and stretched out of shape.'

Touched that she'd remembered such a tiny detail about him, Paul continued. ‘It wouldn't have worked back then, however much I would have loved it to.'

‘It wouldn't?'

‘I didn't want you on the rebound, Amy. I wanted you to be with me because you wanted to be, not as some sort of conciliation prize.'

Amy recoiled at the idea that he should think her capable of that, but in her heart she knew he was right. ‘But things are different now.'

‘They certainly are. If you'd told me back then that Jack would turn out to be gay, I'd never have believed you.' Not wanting to go down that particular road yet again, Paul returned to the matter in hand, ‘It's OK Amy. I know you don't love me. But do you think, perhaps, you might learn to?'

‘I don't see why not.' Amy leaned forward and kissed him. A kiss which spoke of future kisses to come, and not once did Amy compare the moment to another kiss many years ago.

At that point Paul had declared that his self-control had reached a low ebb, and he'd better return to the student flat he was renting, or he'd have to make love to her right there, and he didn't think she was ready for that yet.

She hadn't been, but Amy thought, as she threw her toast crusts away, that if he'd made a move she wouldn't have stopped him. She felt an unfamiliar glow spread throughout her body. It was nice to have something to look forward to.

Kit was already installed at her usual table by the time Amy reached Pickwicks front door. Seeing the expression on Kit's face, Amy realised that she had already been told about her date with Paul, and was waiting for details. Amy was surprised to find that she didn't mind. Somehow it wasn't the same as being the last to know about the job.

Peggy also looked knowing as Amy hung up her coat, ‘Good evening last night then?'

Amy turned from one friend to another, ‘OK, let's get this over with.' She tried to be stern, but somehow seemed unable to prevent her mouth turning up at the corners. ‘Come on Peggy, let's sit with Kit while it's quiet, then I'll only have to go through it once!'

Talking quietly, Amy filled her friends in on the events of the day before.

‘So, Paul gave you the napkin, which is a dead sweet thing to do by the way, then what? I mean, has he told you how this all happened?' Kit had a shine in her eyes which betrayed her hunt for good story fodder. ‘Why didn't he say anything years ago?'

Peggy, who knew the signs of Kit being desperate to pick up a pen to capture the moment, stepped in, ‘Kit, I hope you're not going to exploit my waitress' new-found happiness for writing gain!'

Kit's eyes flashed playfully, ‘As if I would!'

‘Actually, if you wrote it all down,' Amy laughed with them, ‘it might help me make sense of it all!'

Amy had reached the part of her account were she reported the arrival of the morning's texts when work intervened, in the shape of a group of hats, shopping trolleys, and their assorted elderly owners, coming in for morning tea.

Kit watched Amy as she attended to the customers, laughing and joking with them as she took their orders. Pickwicks was going to be a very different place without her. Phil had asked her to suggest the fifth of February to Amy as a good start date at Home Hunters. She felt a bit uneasy about the circumstances with Paul though. Could someone really be in love with a woman they hadn't seen for years? How could Amy go from having no idea that someone liked her – or, indeed, loved her – to embracing the idea so wholeheartedly, so fast?

It might have been eons since Amy and Jack had split, but Kit feared she might find the word rebound flashing beneath Amy's new bubbly persona if she looked hard enough. But then, Kit considered, as a new train of thought wove itself from the current situation into the fabric of her novel, wasn't that how it had been for her and Phil? Hadn't he rescued her from Jack-induced delusions? It had worked for her, was still working. Why not for Amy and Paul? Might he not be the perfect person for her? After all, Paul knew the score with Jack. There were no hidden feelings, no secret skeletons to burst out of the cupboard in twenty years' time.

‘What's he like these days?' Kit managed to collar Amy in a lull an hour later.

Amy habitually straightened the serviette holder on Kit's table as she spoke, ‘When did you last see him?'

‘Not since I was with Jack. He's always here so briefly between digs.'

‘Well,' Amy sank down on a free seat, considering where to start. ‘He's kind, quiet, tall, has sapphire-blue eyes, short dark hair, broad shoulders, oh and he's got a job at the British Museum, isn't that fantastic!'

‘Amy?' Kit's voice oozed caution, ‘this is all a bit quick isn't it? I mean, you can't love him already, can you?'

Amy dragged a chair closer and spoke reassuringly. ‘Of course not! But I do like him loads. He's my friend; we have a comfortable history together. I just know he'll never hurt me. He'll never let me down. If that's not a good start for a relationship, I don't know what is!'

Kit said nothing, but looked so suspicious that Amy couldn't help but laugh, ‘I know. I know. It's what every woman says about some man at some point, and most are completely wrong. I'm thirty-four years old! He loves me, and I'm sure I'll grow to love him. It isn't like it's a chore! You wait till you see him again, he's gorgeous!'

‘Well, I hope you're right. You certainly deserve someone nice after all that crap with Jack.'

‘Jack!' Amy clapped a hand to her mouth, ‘I'd forgotten all about him. He is not going to like this at all.'

Kit groaned, ‘Oh Amy, you're priceless. Only you could worry about what your ex thinks.'

‘He's far more important than that, he's my friend. He'll be worried about me. I haven't even replied to the texts he sent me yesterday yet.'

‘Which is a good sign.'

‘It is?'

‘Sure. When you're with Paul, you're clearly not thinking about Jack. Any bloke that can push him from your addled brain has got to stand a fighting chance.'

Amy's face blushed bright pink, ‘All the same, I need to tell him.'

Kit laid down the pen she'd been writing with, ‘He knows.'

‘How?' Amy felt guilt rise in her gullet.

‘We went for a drink last night. Rob had told him.'

‘And?' Amy, who found she'd been holding her breath, expelled it as Kit replied.

‘He was fine about it. I'll tell you all later, you've got a new customer.' As Amy reluctantly retreated towards the latest client, Kit called after her, ‘Oh, and Phil asked me to talk to you about the new job later, and I've got some news too.'