Anything But Mine (4 page)

Jen shook her head and looked at the floor. “I don’t know. I want to be with you, too, but I don’t want you to be my rebound guy.”

“And I definitely don’t want to be just your rebound guy. I want to be with you, but only when you’re ready.”

“So you think we should wait?”

“Jen, I think patience is a virtue. Whether it is tonight, next week, or next month, I’ll be here for you when you’re ready. I care about you, a lot. You’re my best friend. So, take your time. I’m not going anywhere.” Drew stood up and, gesturing towards the staircase, asked, “So, which bedroom should I take?”

“Umm…pick whichever one you want. There are four upstairs. My bedroom is down here,” she said, standing up.

Drew kissed Jen on the top of her head, then on her lips. “Good night,” he said, before grabbing his duffel bag and climbing the stairs two at a time.

Jen watched him go up the stairs, and then returned to the kitchen to place the last couple of dirty wine glasses in the dishwasher. When she was done, she turned out the lights and walked towards her bedroom, glancing up the stairs in the hopes of catching a glimpse of Drew.

For a moment, Jen thought about running up the stairs and jumping into bed with Drew, but knew deep down that he was right.
Patience is a virtue
, she thought with a sigh. She walked down the hallway to her bedroom, closing the door behind her, but was unable to get Drew out of her mind as she conjured up a mental image of him lying in bed.
I know he is right, that we need to be patient, but I’m not sure I can wait that much longer
.

As Jen climbed into bed, she was bathed in the moonlight shining through the French doors leading from her room to the rear patio. Lying on her side, she gazed up at the night sky but, despite being exhausted, she couldn’t fall asleep knowing Drew was right upstairs.

Her mind wandered back to the morning just two weeks earlier, when she walked in on Chris and Vicky in bed, and she felt sick to her stomach.
It seems like a lifetime ago, and just yesterday, all at the same time, that my world came crashing down around me
, she thought, as she turned over on her back and stared up at the ceiling. She felt a catch in her throat, and her eyes filled with tears that slowly rolled down her face. Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, she realized that she wasn’t ready yet to begin a physical relationship with Drew if she was still shedding tears over Chris.
I’ve got to get the “date” with Vince Moscolo over with as soon as possible,
she silently vowed, as she tossed back and forth, unable to sleep.
Then I can make a fresh start with Drew.

CHAPTER FIVE

I
n the weeks leading up to Christmas, Jen and Drew went on frequent dinner and movie dates in addition to their daily runs, with the understanding that they would move cautiously, and not rush their relationship. “Patience is a virtue,” was Drew’s mantra, as he and Jen held hands, kissed, and cuddled together, but nothing more.
But the waiting is killing me,
he thought.

He and Jen skated arm in arm at Wollman Rink on the last Friday before Christmas after he finished work at a nearby television station, where he was employed as an assistant producer and substitute sports reporter. “Want to get some hot chocolate? I’m freezing,” Drew asked, as they left the ice rink.

“That sounds perfect,” Jen said, as she followed Drew to the concession stand. While he placed their order, she stole a quick sideways glance at Drew’s handsome profile.
You’ve become such a big part of my life,
she thought.

While they sipped their hot chocolate, Drew asked, “So, what’s the plan for tomorrow? I’d love to see you again before I head home to California on Sunday.”

“I think I’m going to pick up a Christmas tree,” Jen replied. “Want to come over in the afternoon and help me decorate it? I’ll make a nice dinner, and we can spend the day together.”

“I’d love that,” Drew said, as he put his arm around Jen and kissed the top of her head. “I’m going to miss you while I’m back home.”

The following afternoon, as Jen stared out her living room window at the Manhattan skyline, watching snow flurries swirl in the wind, she realized that she was slowly falling in love with Drew.
I can’t wait for later,
she thought as she pulled her cashmere cardigan tightly around her body.
Tonight is the night. Tonight we’ll finally be together.

Drew arrived at Jen’s apartment with a bottle of champagne and a sprig of mistletoe. “All the ingredients for a perfect celebration,” he said, as Jen greeted him with a hug.

“Thanks for the champagne,” Jen said, as she placed it in the refrigerator. “We can have it later with dinner, but let’s make use of the mistletoe right away,” she said, as she placed her lips on his.

Drew pulled Jen close, not wanting to let her go.
I have no idea how I’m going to get through the next ten days without you while I’m home for Christmas,
he thought, as he held her tightly.

Jen put on some Christmas music, and together they sang along with all the classic tunes of the season while hanging ornaments on the seven foot tall Frasier fir she had picked out earlier in the day.

“You’re good at so many things, Jen, but you really can’t carry a tune,” Drew teased, as she sang along to the Christmas carols.

Laughing, Jen agreed. “I know, right? You have a much better voice than I do,” she said, as she took a couple of steps back from the tree, assessing the decorations. “I think we’re just about done,” she added, as she reached into a box and handed Drew the star for the top of the tree. “Can you put that on top? I can’t reach it.”

Drew reached up and placed the gold star on top of the tree, just as “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Vince Vance and the Valiants came through the speakers. Drew grabbed Jen from behind, and together they began to sway to the music.

“I’ve always loved this song,” Jen said.

“Me too,” Drew agreed.

After a few moments, Drew turned Jen around and pulled her in towards him, and she reached up and wrapped her arms around him, holding him close against her body.

“You know, this song says it all, because you’re all I want for Christmas,” Drew said, as he continued to hold her tightly, caressing her back and running his hands through her long hair. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head, then tilted her chin up so he could gaze into her brown eyes.

Drew lowered his head, and lightly kissed Jen on the lips, and she returned his kiss without hesitation. Softly and slowly, they continued to kiss, allowing their lips and tongues to explore each other’s mouths, and their hands to explore each other’s bodies in ways they had not done before. “Oh my God, Jen,” Drew moaned. “I want you so much.”

The desire for Drew that had quietly burned inside Jen during the weeks leading up to that moment exploded into an inferno, consuming her with a passion unlike any she had previously experienced. Overwhelmed, she took Drew’s hand and said, breathlessly, “I think we’ve waited long enough.” Leading him towards her bedroom, she beckoned, “Come with me.”

Jen and Drew lay down together on her four-
poster
king-
sized
bed, and held each other tightly, not wanting to rush the moment they had both patiently waited for. Drew ran his hand down Jen’s body, beginning at her forehead, lightly touching her with the tips of his fingers, lingering at her lips, mouth and ears, before slowly tracing a line down the side of her neck. He took his time, slowly moving his hand down her chest until he reached her breasts, and ran his fingers in circles around each of them, causing her pulse to race and her breathing to quicken. Just as Drew leaned in to kiss her, their reverie was interrupted when his cell phone rang.

Drew swore under his breath, as he took the cell phone out of his pocket and looked at it. He placed it on the nearby nightstand, and returned his attention to Jen.

“Aren’t you going to answer it?”

“It’s my sister. I can call her back later,” he replied. “Now, where were we?” Turning his attention back to Jen, Drew began kissing her again, when the sound of a text message came from his phone, which he also ignored, choosing instead to untie the bow of the red silk scarf Jen had strung through the belt loops of her jeans. “It’s like I’m getting to open an early Christmas gift,” Drew said, in between kisses.

“Mmm…me too,” Jen said, as she reached for the top button on Drew’s oxford shirt, opening it and parting the fabric so she could kiss his chest, before moving down and opening the next few buttons, nibbling at each bit of newly exposed skin. She had just reached the last button before his belt buckle when Drew’s phone rang again.

Exasperated, he reached for his phone, and looked at the display. “It’s my mom. I’d better answer it,” he said. “Hi, mom. What’s up?”

After a few seconds, Drew abruptly sat up on the edge of Jen’s bed. “What? When?” then after a minute, he asked, his voice cracking, “How is he? Is he going to be okay?” As Drew listened in silence to his mother, Jen sat up and moved next to him on the edge of her bed. “Okay, Mom. Tell him I love him, and that I’ll be home tomorrow. I’ll call you later, but please call me if there is any change in his condition. I love you, Mom.”

“What happened, Drew?”

“My father had a heart attack this morning,” he replied. “He’s in critical condition, and they’re not sure if he’s going to pull through.” Drew covered his face with his hands. “Oh God, Jen, I love my father so much, and I feel so useless here, and helpless because I’m not there with him.”

Jen reached out and tried to take Drew in her arms in an attempt to comfort him, but he shrugged out of her embrace. “Are there any flights tonight? Maybe we can get you out there sooner than tomorrow,” Jen said, as she stood up and jogged towards the living room to retrieve her laptop.

After searching every possible flight option, Drew came to the conclusion that he would have to wait until the next day to fly home to California. He looked over at Jen, who had been sitting silently by his side while he researched flights, and said, “you’ve been really quiet, Jen.”

“I don’t know what to say, Drew, so I’ve just been praying for your dad,” she said, holding up a set of rosary beads.

A wave of emotion washed over Drew, as he moved closer towards Jen, and said, “Thanks. He can use the prayers.” He gazed into her eyes, filled with concern and love, and reached out to take her hands in his. Hanging his head, he continued, “This is not the way I wanted our last day together before Christmas to end, Jen.”

“I know, but what happened with your father was out of everyone’s control.”

“What should we do now?”

“Well, we still have to eat. Let me make you dinner. I don’t want you to be alone tonight.”

Drew agreed, and asked, “Is it okay if we did something first before dinner?”

“Sure. What would you like to do?”

“I’d really like to go to Mass.”

Jen looked at the clock on her nightstand. “There’s a 5:00 Mass at Assumption, the church over on Cranberry Street. Is that okay?”

Drew nodded his head. “I know my parents would both be happy if I went to Mass tonight,” he said, taking out his phone and sending a text to his mother and sister.

After Mass, Drew and Jen held hands as they took a detour and walked along the Brooklyn Heights Promenade on the way back to Jen’s apartment. Looking across the river towards Manhattan, Drew said, “There’s nothing like this view. It’s the second-
best
thing about living here.”

“What’s the best thing?” Jen asked.

Sighing, Drew draped an arm around Jen’s shoulder. “You are.”

They continued walking along the Promenade in silence, until they reached Clark Street. When they reached Jen’s building, Drew said, “I need to go back to my apartment to finish packing. I’ll be over in about an hour. Is that okay?”

“Sounds good. See you then,” Jen said. She began to enter her building, and then turned around and called out, “Hey, Drew -
do
you want bring your things with you, so you can leave from my place in the morning?”

Drew turned, and walked back towards Jen. “I’d love to spend the night with you, Jen, but I’m not sure I’m going to be the best company.”

Jen’s anxiety welled up inside her, and her stomach churned. “I’m worried about you, though, and I don’t want you to be alone. Think about it, and just bring your bags with you if you want to stay over.”

The next hour dragged, as Jen waited for Drew to return to her apartment. She kept busy by scrubbing two potatoes and placing them in the oven with a small filet mignon roast, before sautéing some mushrooms and making a salad. When the prep work for dinner was done, she poured herself a glass of cabernet sauvignon, and wandered over to the living room window to take in the skyline view. As she sipped her wine, she reflected back on the afternoon she and Drew had just spent together, her heart aching for him and his family.

She was immersed in a silent prayer for Drew’s father when the doorman rang to let her know he had arrived. When she opened the door a moment later, Jen smiled when she noticed he had brought his suitcases with him.

“I thought about it, and realized you were right, Jen. I really don’t want to be alone tonight,” he said after he walked through the door. He placed his bags down in the foyer, and continued, “Next stop, San Francisco.”

“I’m glad you’re here,” Jen said, as she moved towards Drew and took him into her arms. She snuggled her cheek against his neck for a moment, then looked up at him and asked, “Are you hungry? Dinner should be ready any minute.”

Drew spoke with his mother and sister a few times during the evening, getting updates on his father’s condition. “The quadruple bypass surgery went as well as could be expected, but it’s going to be very long road to recovery,” he said, after a lengthy conversation with his mother.

“Thank goodness he came through the surgery,” Jen offered, not knowing what to say.

“Yeah, thank goodness”, Drew agreed, as he stared at the floor. Barely able to look at Jen, he continued, “My mom asked me to take over my father’s business, at least for the time being, until he is well enough to go back to work.”