Anywhere But Here (27 page)

Fin snatched a handful of the little sandwiches a
s he announced that we’d be in the rec room watching a movie then gestured for me to follow.  I was more than happy to do that very thing so I gave everyone a tiny wave and shuffled after him.

“Geez, Rena,” he groaned cheerfully as he opened a door leading to the basement.  He flipped on a light that flooded the staircase before descending the steps.  “You act as if you’d never interacted with a parent before.”

“Yeah, well, whatever,” I grumbled.  “I just get the feeling not many parents like me.”

He paused halfway
down the stairs in order to gape at me.  My cheeks burned and I wished that I’d kept my mouth shut. “Really?  Because my parents told me that they thought you were sweet even if you were a little shy.”

That floored me for a second.  I’d been certain that I’d seen something other than like in Mrs. Finley’s eyes the first time I
'd met her.  Maybe she’d just been appeasing her son so as to avoid some kind of argument – I had no clue.  But I was nearly positive that I hadn’t been imagining it.

He stood on th
e step, staring, waiting for me to answer.  His face was precious – so innocent yet not really – that I couldn’t distort his view on life.  I had to lie.

“I guess I’m just shy,” I said with a coy smile.  I moseyed up to him, still a step higher, and placed a kiss on the corner of his mouth.  “Now, about that movie?”

We continued down the stairs to the basement and when he hit another switch, I was totally taken aback by the huge television.  I took the last step slowly as I admired the television.  Fin had disappeared from my immediate view but when I dragged my eyes away from the TV, I found him perusing a rack of DVDs.

“What are you in the mood to watch?” he asked.

“I don’t care,” I said as I continued to admire the room.  A long couch faced the TV with two matching recliners flanking it.  A heavy, dark coffee table was positioned strategically in front of the sofa with two matching end tables next to the chairs.  The walls were dry walled and painted a soothing off-white shade and the floor carpeted with a deep blue Berber.  Movie posters were tacked to the walls from time periods that spanned several decades.

“We have the classics, comedies, romantic comedies, horror, sci-fi…”

“Damn,” I cursed quietly as I joined him near a homemade wooden rack that spanned a side wall of a hallway.  “Wow.”

“Yeah,” he said, slight blush on his cheeks.  “My parents like movies. They belong to a DVD club.”

“I guess,” I said, still astounded by their collection. I wondered if they’d actually watched every one of them.

“So, what do you want to watch?”

I snorted, having no clue where to even begin.  “You pick.”

Laughing, he
ruffled my hair then trailed a finger over the titles until he found one that had only recently been released to DVD.  He held it up and I nodded, not really caring what we watched.  He pointed to the sofa and I took his cue. I sat down as he fiddled with the TV and DVD player.  Once everything was set, he sat next to me, placing his arm on the back of the couch behind me.

I suddenly realized that we were pretty much alone for the first time - more alone than we’d ever been.  Granted, his parents could come downstairs, but from the sound of their raucous voices, it didn’t seem like that would happen anytime soon.  I snuggled into him and he dropped his arm to my shoulder.

His lips brushed the top of my head causing a small shiver to shimmy up my spine.  “Rena?” His soft voice only intensified my shiver.

“Hmm?”  I inched closer, rubbing my chee
k on his chest. His scent was amazing – so clean and…manly.  I wasn’t sure if it was his soap or just him but I wanted to bottle it and smear it all over my pillow.

He chuckled softly in my hair as his
hand slipped further to rest on my waist.  “Still with me?”

I lifted my chin to smile at him but my breath caught at the desire raging in his eyes.  The smile slipped as he leaned closer and I scooted up so our lips could meet.  My eyes fluttered shut as he applied more pressure and wrapped his other arm around me.  I shifted my body to face his and tossed my arms over his shoulders so I could bury my fingers in his soft curls.  He slowly leaned back, taking me with him until I was almost lying on top of him. Our lips remained firmly attached until he drew back slightly to catch his ragged breath.  I bent over him, eager to continue our very pleasing activity, my ponytail falling over my shoulder.

Releasing my hair, he ran his fingers through it, a satisfied sigh escaping his lips.  “You are so lovely, Rena.”

My heart sputtered as I kissed him again, putting all my confusing emotions into it.  He groaned, parted his lips
, and pressed the small of my back, forcing my body into his. The fire burning underneath my skin was nearly suffocating but I couldn’t bear to back off – I wanted the heat.  Needed it.

Fin removed his mouth from mine and dragged his lips down the side of my neck causing me to tremble uncontrollably. I slanted my head, making it easier for him to reach me while my own hands skimmed his shoulders and toured the hard muscles in his arms.  Hockey had been very good to him.

“Damn, Rena,” he breathed huskily as his mouth reached my ear.  “You’re driving me crazy.”  He held me as he shifted us on the couch so we were both lying on our sides.

My hands slipped to his waist and slithered under his shirt, itching to touch his skin.  He sucked in a breath at the contact and I grinned in satisfaction before kissing his throat.

“You’re lucky my parents are here,” he chuckled, his voice still hoarse.

“I think you’re the lucky one,” I teased then pressed my lips to his.

“I know I am,” he mumbled against my mouth, his hands tangled in my hair.

Just as our lips met again, a voice called down the stairs.

“Would you kids like some popcorn?”

We jumped simultaneously, each straightening our clothing.  I scooted a couple inches away from him and patted down my hair.

“Sure, Mom,” Fin called, a smirk twitching his lips.  “I’ll come get it.”

He grabbed the remote off the coffee table and paused the movie like we’d actually been watching it.  He bent to kiss me quickly and gave me a wink. 

“I’ll bring us some drinks, too.”

I nodded, still too breathless to talk. I waited until he tromped up the stairs then felt around on the floor until I found my hair ti
e.  Wandering down the hall, I located a small bathroom.  As I gazed in the mirror, I hoped Fin’s eyes weren’t as wild as mine and his hair wasn’t as disheveled – his parents would definitely know what we’d been up to. That would most likely not bode well in my favor.

I did the best I could with my hair and returned to the sofa just as Fin set a large bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and handed me a soda.  I flushed, recalling instantly how it had felt to have his lips on mine and his hands in my hair.

“You okay?” he asked, his brow creased.

“Peachy,” I said, standing
on my toes to kiss him.  His arms instantly wrapped around me and I was more than a little willing to repeat our last performance but he reluctantly pulled away.

“Um,” he said sheepishly.  “Maybe we should watch the movie.  I have a feeling my mother will keep checking on us.”

Blushing once again, I sank to the sofa, too embarrassed to talk.  But Fin seemed untroubled and merely sat next to me, setting the bowl on my lap before draping an arm around my shoulders.  He restarted the movie and this time, we watched it, laughing in the appropriate places.

“So, Rena,” he said playfully squeezing my shoulder.  “I meant to ask you something earlier but you sort of distracted me.”

My face blazed but I kept my head down, hoping he wouldn’t notice, and crammed a handful of popcorn in my mouth.

“Rena?”

I swallowed and peeked up at him, lifting a brow.  “Yes?”

“You seemed awfully upset earlier – well, actually all day.”  He paused, probably giving me a chance to insert some sort of explanation but I remained mum.  “Um, do you want to talk about it?  Tell me what’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong,” I said, forcing my voice to be convincing.  “Just, you know, not much sleep and …stuff.”

He wasn’t buying it - that much was evident on his face.  His brow crinkled as his eyes continued to search mine for truth.  I was aching to drop my gaze but then my lie would be more than obvious.  I grimaced inside as I waited for him to speak.

“I…well…sometimes it seems like you have something on your mind.  Something heavy,” he said, ducking to catch my eyes when I bowed my head.  “Do you?”

“Not really,” I whispered, turning my head.  “Nothing I really want to talk about right now.  It’s nothing, actually.”

He did not believe me in the least – that was so apparent in his eyes – but he let it drop which was just fine with me.  “Okay but I want you to know that I really like you, Rena, and I know we haven’t been…this way, for long but I’m always here for you.  Yeah, that sounds corny or whatever but I honestly mean it.”

I wanted to cry – could feel the tears bu
rning the backs of my eyes. I was absolutely dying to fall into his arms so he could hold me and protect me from all the pain and misery and just plain old agony that followed me around like a bloodhound.  I just wanted release.  I wanted someone to know.  I wanted someone to look at me without sympathy overflowing in their eyes and say “hey, I understand” and really mean it.  But I wasn’t ready for it to be Fin.  Not yet.  It was too soon.

“Thanks, but I’m fine. Really.”

Tipping my chin, he looked into my eyes.  “No, you’re not.  But I won’t push.  I’ll wait.”

Biting my lower lip, I
nodded, the tear buildup not yet waning.  He stroked my cheek so lovingly that I began to soften but I just couldn’t confide in him.  Not yet.

He kissed me tenderly, our lips parting slowly,
and then smiled.  “Let’s watch the rest of this movie, huh?”

I agreed and snuggled into him, content to munch on popcorn and forget all about the harsh, cruel world that was waiting for me, ready to bite me again once I
left the safety of Fin’s arms.

As ten o’clock grew nearer, I announced th
at I needed to get home.  I remembered how Fin’s parents could be a little strict about school night curfews and I didn’t want to push the envelope, so to speak.  He walked me upstairs where the Bridge game was breaking up and I bid them all goodnight, thanking them for their hospitality.

“Sleep tonight, huh?” Fin said with a half-smile as he helped me with my coat.

Sappy, gooey romantic words were on the tip of my tongue – things like I
would
sleep because I’d dream about him – but I managed to suppress them.  I liked him, more than I probably should, and didn’t want to frighten him.  Plus, I didn’t want to look like an idiot.

“I’ll see you in the mo
rning,” I whispered instead, quickly kissed him before any of the adults could enter the room.  I rushed out the door to my freezing cold car with my conflicting emotions.

On the one hand, I
felt
all gooey and sappy.  It was so wonderful to be in a…relationship again.  A real one.  Once I got past the arrogance, Fin was a sweet, thoughtful person.  He was a definite bright spot in my life – something I desperately needed.

On the other hand,
the guilt would come.  I was sure I’d feel wretched when I went to bed and thought about my baby sister.  How could I expect to be happy when she was out there somewhere whether locked in a cellar or in a shallow, cold grave?

A shiver ran up my spine again but it was not pleasant in the slightest.  I hated when my mind wandered down the ‘what happened to Camille’ road.  My chest tightened and I had to work harder to move air through my lungs.  By the time I parked in Aunt Franki’s driveway, my head was spinning and I was clutching my chest, hunched over the steering wheel, with sweat collecting on the back of my neck.

“Breathe, Rena, breathe,” I coached as I concentrated on an extremely long icicle hanging from the eaves of the house and pushed thoughts of Camille out of my head.  It took nearly five minutes to get my head to slow and my breathing to even out, though when I started worrying about Aunt Franki coming out to check on me, I almost set the whole thing in motion again.

Finally, I was able to compose myself well enough to enter the house and make short, polite conver
sation before dashing off to my room.  I only hoped Aunt Franki would either be in bed or engrossed in a television program.

“Hey, how was your evening?” Aunt Franki asked as I shut and locked the front door.  I kicked off my wet shoes, stalling, giving my body a few extra seconds to return to normalcy.

“Fine,” I called as I slowly ambled into the living room.  “I hung out at Fin’s house and watched movies.”

“Oh?” she asked as she peeked at me, a brow lifted. 

“His parents were home,” I mumbled, rolling my eyes.  “We were properly chaperoned and managed to control our raging, teenage hormones.”

She snorted out a laugh and waved me away.  “Go to bed you brat.  I’ll see you in the morning.”