Ariel (19 page)

“Hey. I was just heading back to the cabin. Figured you two would be taking care of your personal business, not traipsing out her after me,” Ariel joked.

Brandi snorted. “Gareth is fast. Business resolved for us long ago. I left him sleeping it off.”

“Same here,” Heidi said. “Ryan is nervous. I faked it so he’d go to sleep. I’m too worried to enjoy myself.”

“Why? Are you all as worried about Reed as I am?” Ariel asked, looking between them to see both heads nodding.

She sighed when they were in sight of the cabins again and headed to a covered shelter with several picnic tables under it. When she sat, they each took seats across from her. It had been this way since their conversion. On the gurneys, they’d been complete strangers. As werewolves, they were a solid team of three.

For the first time since her conversion, Ariel felt emotion rising in a wave which threatened to bring on a flood of tears. Other than extremely lonely, she couldn’t describe what her life had been like before she knew them.

“Reed refers to our connection to each other as having a
pack mentality
. While my scientific mind struggles with his explanation, I do feel like I’ve known you two all my life,” Ariel confessed.

Brandi nodded. “You’re not the only one who thinks this is weird, Ariel. I have this constant sense of your…I don’t know…personality or something reaching out to me all the time. It’s almost like you’re a family member…I guess…or at least what I’ve always imagined having a family would be like. I never really had much of a family.”

Ariel sighed. “I’ve never been one of those people who butt into other people’s personal business, but I don’t seem to be able to stop the urges where the two of you are concerned. Have you given any thought to what you want to do when we get back to Wasilla?”

Heidi tucked her hair behind her ears. “My life…before all this…was not so great. My parents were killed when I was a junior in college. They left behind mostly debts so I had to drop out of school. Thinking I was going to start over fresh, I followed a guy I met to Anchorage. After he ditched me and took off to the lower forty-nine again, I was suddenly left in Alaska with no car, no money, and no way of making a living. I found a way to get by, but kind of lost track of my self-esteem in the process. It’s not like I slept with all the guys I entertained, but I got paid to make them happy any way I could.”

Ariel shrugged, but held Heidi’s gaze. “Given what Brandi and I have done to survive the shitty part of our lives, I don’t think we’re going to be throwing any stones. What were you studying in college?”

“Medicine,” Heidi said quietly. “I hadn’t decided whether or not I wanted to be a doctor, but working with Eva…that’s been great for me. I like helping heal people. If I get to do it for the rest of my life, then I think I’m going to be okay with being a werewolf…or whatever we are.”

Ariel smiled. “Science made us, but Reed says we’re definitely werewolves. According to him, conversion only works one way. All we can do now is adapt to what we’ve become. Denial wouldn’t keep our wolves from breaking free now and again.”

Brandi huffed out a breath. “Well, I’m fine with being a werewolf, even if I decide to go back to my old life, which really would be just to my old job. My parents took off when I was a kid and I was raised by my grandparents. They died within a couple years of each other while I was serving in the military. All I really have in my life is my work. Frankly, being a wolf makes me more kick-ass than I was as a plain human. I admit shifting hurts like hell, but that’s the only bad thing.”

“I like my wolf too,” Ariel admitted. “And I have no reason to go back to my old life either. My father died when I was fifteen. My mother remarried in her late thirties and started a new family while I was in college on scholarships. She never understood why I wanted to study science, much less do lab research. After my two step-sisters were born, I became nothing more to my mother than a reminder of her past. I’m sure she’s not grieving over my death. She probably rolled her eyes at the news and resumed her soccer mom life without missing a beat.”

“So are you two planning to stay in the Gray Wolf pack when we get back?” Heidi asked.

Brandi shook her head. “No—I want to get to the bottom of who’s behind Feldspar and turn them in to be investigated. We don’t want more of us getting made. Not that I plan to reveal what I am to anyone by going back to my job. Who would believe me? I’d end up in a rubber room talking to myself. But…I think I’m going to need to see you guys…now and again…to fill the hole in my gut. I don’t think I could be at peace if I didn’t. Whether I get it or not, I think we do have some sort of real connection.”

Ariel nodded. “I’ll be honest. I don’t know what I want to do. My wolf is not going to let me go back to my old life. She needs…hell I don’t know how to say this…more important work I suppose. God only knows what I’m going to end up doing. Maybe I’ll have to go into Brandi’s line of work so I can do something productive with all these violent urges I have now.”

Brandi snorted and then laughed. “You might not want to do that, Ariel. I’m not productive—I’m destructive—and life sucks regularly. The whole naked and trapped on a gurney thing had happened way more often to me than you ever want to know about.”

Ariel laughed. “I still admire your destructive urges in ways I can’t admit in front of our sweet little healer here.”

Brandi snickered over Heidi’s glare. “Want to go off into the Alaskan wilderness and start our own village like Reed’s family did?”

Ariel laughed aloud. “No and hell no. I don’t even want to be in Alaska—but I also don’t want to leave. I can’t figure out the source of my conflict. I hate the cold. And I swear I’m going to learn to shift with all my clothes on if it kills me.”

They all laughed, but Ariel noticed Brandi and Heidi exchanging secretive glances. “What? Why are you two looking so guilty?”

Brandi grinned. “Well, I know you’re the
alpha
among the three of us—I mean your wolf is freaking huge—but oh bloody hell, I can already shift and keep my clothes on.”

“Bullshit,” Ariel exclaimed. She glared at Heidi. “Let me guess—your smile means you can do it too?”

At Heidi’s nod, Ariel’s swore even more viciously. Her language was definitely more colorful since her conversion. Her wolf’s raw emotions seemed to need a deeper verbal expression than her logical scientific decisions ever did. Politeness and formal language didn’t do anything to ease the frustration at all.

“You’re worrying too much about keeping them on,” Brandi declared, feeling the need to be helpful. “Don’t over-think it, Ariel. Just decide to do it and it will happen.”

“Exactly,” Heidi agreed.

Ariel laughed at their encouragement and their bobbing nods. “Well, so far all I’ve managed to keep on when I shift are my stupid boots.”

She wanted to be offended when they laughed uncontrollably at the image, but she couldn’t. Even she thought it was funny. After Reed and Matt’s laughing at her many failed attempts, she was nearly immune to ridicule.

“Do you think Reed’s son really did father both Travis and Hanuk?” Heidi asked.

Ariel thought about it and nodded. “Yes. I think they were telling us the truth. It kind of also explains why they look so much like Reed. The gene pool was one stream after all.”

Brandi nodded. “I saw part of this situation in a vision. But Reed’s mate…I’ll never be able to tell him, but I don’t think she wandered off. I think she was left in the cold to die by one or both of his grandsons.”

Ariel drew in a breath and let it out slowly. “Reed was obviously wrong about Travis being good. I see him still dealing with that disappointment. If he has to challenge his own grandsons for the alpha role, I don’t know how he’ll hold up mentally. It’s not the physical fight that will take him down. It will be knowing he’s fighting his grandchildren. Look how he’s been with us. He has invested three hundred years here as the Black Wolf Alpha. His level of caring about these people exceeds what I can even imagine someone feeling.”

Their heads turned toward the cabins when Gareth stuck his head out. Ariel kept her smile hidden as Brandi sighed in frustration and stood, but she couldn’t resist teasing the fierce woman. “Guess it’s past your bedtime, Brandi.”

Rising to head back as well, Ariel winked at a grinning Heidi as Brandi swore and stomped off toward the cabin door Gareth held open as he waited for her.

***

Ariel woke to Reed lying on the bed next to hers, staring at the ceiling. It was obvious he hadn’t been asleep yet. Still wearing most of yesterday’s clothes, she quietly got up, went to the bathroom, and returned to crawl under her covers again. It was cold in the cabin even if Reed seemed impervious to it.

“Good morning,” she said, trying for conversation.

“Good morning,” Reed replied, turning his head. “My son admitted to being the father of both boys, but it was not unfaithfulness in the truest sense. His older brother, a child I had with my second mate, was unable to give his mate a child. They asked for his help to keep his inability a secret within the family rather than just remaining barren. My son broke down and told his mother the day before she walked off and froze to death. Guilt kept him from confessing the same thing to me. Somehow both Travis and Hanuk found out and decided to punish everyone involved for their embarrassing parentage. When I left, they used my grief to gain control of the pack. They emotionally blackmailed their parents into maintaining their silence. I think exercising power over so many people gave them back some of the personal dignity they thought our family took away. Rather than punish just their mutual father though, they punished the pack with a heavy-handed form of justice. And apparently both of them rule the same.”

Ariel waited for the silence to stretch out before answering. “What are you planning to do, Reed?” She watched him shrug his shoulders without changing positions.

“I’m not sure yet. If I challenge for the alpha position, they have already said they will band together to stop me from ever ruling again. If I don’t challenge though, I leave my pack at the mercy of two vindictive children who rule with cruelty. I am glad my mate is not alive to see this happening and it is the first time I’ve been glad she is gone. My heart hurts from those thoughts.”

“I can tell and I’m sorry you’re hurting,” Ariel said, watching him nod. “Why don’t you sleep for a little bit? I’ll check on everyone and make sure they’re doing okay. We’ll get together to talk about it later.”

“Rest seems like an unworthy escape,” Reed stated, rolling to his side.

“It’s not an escape, it’s a respite. Sometimes a little sleep changes how you see things,” Ariel said softly.

When Reed didn’t answer, Ariel crawled out of the bed and gathered the rest of her clothing. Slipping into the bathroom again, she dressed for the day and went to find everyone else.

***

“Gareth, what do you think?” Ariel demanded.

Not really wanting to get involved in another pack’s political drama, Gareth shook his head. “What I think doesn’t matter. This is a problem for the Black Wolf pack to solve. I have no say here.”

Brandi smacked him on the arm. “Then how would the same politics work in the Gray Wolf pack? What would happen if Matt got challenged?”

“His challenger would die,” Gareth said flatly.

Ariel snorted. “Or Matt would.” Gareth’s glare made her smile at the man’s loyalty. Matt was lucky to have the loyal man as his second.

“Matt has defeated twenty challengers over the years. Only two of them were spared their lives. The others died in the fight. It was their choice,” Gareth declared.

Ariel’s gaze went to Ryan who was quietly shaking his head before moving back to Gareth. “Do the challenges have to result in participants dying?”

“Not always, but usually,” Gareth admitted.

“Okay then,” Ariel said sharply. “I guess I need to get my personal effects in order. You might as well know this—I’m going to challenge Reed’s grandsons for the Black Wolf pack. If I win, I’ll turn it over to Reed. If I lose, I’m going to take one or both of them out with me to clear the way for him. One of them shot his grandfather and is the reason I’m a werewolf just as much as Crane was. But my fight is not about revenge—it’s about stopping them from hurting other people. Reed has heard story after story of how cruelly they’ve been running things here.”

Gareth frowned. “What about Matt? You promised to return to him.”

Ariel sighed and glared. “And I intend to keep that promise if I can. Matt is a friend—maybe even more than a friend—but this situation is bigger. I’m an alpha and part of the Black Wolf pack. My first loyalty is to Reed, then to Brandi and Heidi. Matt is coming in third. He admitted a male alpha doesn’t want to share his female with others for any reason. I’m not the greatest choice for him.”

“Perhaps…but he is more bound to you than he has shared,” Gareth said softly, feeling disloyal, but also feeling the need to defend his missing friend.

Ariel shook her head. “Matt has no more hold on me than you have on Brandi, or Ryan has on Heidi. That may change in the future for the four of you, but Matt already knows how I feel. I appreciate him. I value him. But we’re talking about a whole village of people who spent three hundred years under Reed’s care. If I was Matt, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. He would do what he thought was right. And that’s what I have to do.”