Asperger Diaries: Jamie's New School (16 page)

Mum said I have
to go back to school on Monday. I asked her what will happen about
the lessons which I missed on Thursday and Friday. She said I would
have to catch up. I don’t know when I will be able to do that
because I already get so much homework. I'm not sure how I will
find out what I missed. Mum said the teachers will make sure I know
what I have to do.

*****

Angela's
Diary

I’ve told Jamie
he has to go back to school on Monday. I’m worried there will be
lots of work for him to catch up on.

Lesley went out
to a bonfire party with her friends. Jamie stayed in his bedroom
with his earplugs in. He has always hated fireworks, but I have
never known why until now. Kids with A.S. often have heightened
senses. So they may be more aware of light and sound. The noise of
the fireworks must have really hurt his ears. I feel terrible
because I used to think he was being a bit of a wimp.

Joe Peters
telephoned today. He had noticed Jamie hadn’t been to school for a
couple of days. I told him about the incident on Wednesday, and my
meeting with the headmaster. At least when I talk to Joe, I know he
will understand and not judge me. He listened to everything I said.
He wasn’t surprised to hear how the meeting had gone. I said I had
kept Jamie off school because he had had a stomach ache. I felt
better for having spoken to Joe, but I am no nearer resolving the
problem. Joe was full of sympathy, but by his own admission he had
failed to get anywhere when he had been in the same position. I
keep thinking about home-education. It seems like a crazy idea.
What do I know about home-education? I have to get the school to
listen and help. I’m not sure that will happen until Jamie has been
diagnosed. And how long is that likely to take?

6th November
(Sunday)

Angela's
Diary

Jamie is very
quiet today. The only time he spoke to me was to ask how he is
meant to catch up on the lessons he has missed. Andrew went over to
Edith’s house for his Sunday lunch today because I had said that I
didn’t want her over here. Lesley went to Courtney’s house first
thing this morning for the day. So that left me at home with Jamie
– again. I thought I would try to cheer him up, so I asked if he
wanted to go out for dinner for a change. He sometimes enjoys a
burger and fries. We usually have to go through the drive-thru
because he doesn’t like to sit inside the restaurant. He said he
didn’t want to because his stomach ache had come back.

I pray we don’t
have another scene at school tomorrow. I don’t think I can handle
it.

7th November
(Monday)

Angela's
Diary

I managed to
get Jamie into school this morning, but he has been in a terrible
state ever since I collected him this afternoon. He has been given
the handouts for some of the lessons he missed last week. He
doesn’t know what he is meant to do with them. Two of the teachers
have also given him the homework which he missed last week. He
doesn’t know when it has to be completed by. In total, that meant
he had four subjects to do tonight. He was at it all evening, but
he still wasn’t anywhere near finished at ten o’ clock when I told
him to call it a day. He got really angry and nasty with me for
making him stop. He said I have to tell the teachers that I
wouldn’t let him finish.

It’s almost
midnight now. He still isn’t asleep. I can hear noises coming from
his bedroom. I daren’t go and check on him because I could set him
off again. Hopefully he will get so tired that he will fall
asleep.

8th November
(Tuesday)

Angela's
Diary

I couldn’t get
Jamie into school this morning. It took me all my time to get him
dressed and into the car. Once we got to the school gates, he
wouldn’t budge. He was stressed, exhausted and terrified that he
was going to get into trouble for not catching up on all of his
homework. I thought about telephoning the headmaster, but I didn’t
want a repeat of last Wednesday. I brought Jamie home. He has been
in his bedroom most of the day.

Andrew is being
as helpful as ever. He said I shouldn’t encourage his skiving.
Great!

9th November
(Wednesday)

Angela's
Diary

I had a
telephone call from the Education Welfare Officer this morning. I
tried to explain the problems that Jamie is having, so that she
would understand why he wasn’t in school. I told her that we were
waiting on an appointment for him to be assessed for A.S. I might
as well have been talking to a brick wall. She didn’t listen to
anything I said. She said that she had spoken to the headmaster who
had told her that Jamie was perfectly happy in school, and was
doing well academically. She reminded me that allowing Jamie to
play truant was an offence for which I could receive a parenting
order or be fined. I said I needed help. She said I should get
Jamie back into school.

I must have
cried for a couple of hours after I put the telephone down. Jamie
came out of his bedroom to ask me if I was okay.

13th November
(Sunday)

Lesley's
Journal

Everything has
gone crazy. Mum said she is taking tram boy out of Armthorpe. She
and dad had the biggest argument I've ever seen them have. Dad was
really mad. I don't think I have ever seen him so angry. She
reckons she is going to home-educate tram boy. That has to be a
joke. Mum makes me look like Einstein. How the hell is she ever
going to teach him? Why doesn't he just go to school like everyone
else? What makes him so special? He has hardly come out of his
bedroom all weekend. I thought mum was going to murder Nana when
she came over today. Nana was having her say as usual. In the end,
mum told her to get out of the house. So something good has come
out of all this.

I reckon it
will all blow over in a few days, and he will be back in school.
Tram boy will just have to suck it up like the rest of us.

20th November
(Sunday)

Lesley's
Journal

There's a new
boy started in our year. He's tall and slim with Jet black hair. He
came to school with a stud in his lip, but they made him go home
and take it out. I've been trying to find out his name - no success
yet. I think Courtney likes him too.

Mum has done
it. She has taken Jamie out of school. She and dad aren't speaking
to one another unless they have to. And nana isn't coming over ever
again - RESULT!! Dad went over to her house for his Sunday lunch
today. What a happy family we are.

They are
starting home-school this week apparently - this I have to see. It
won't last long. Tram boy will drive mum insane - she's almost
there already. I asked mum if she wanted to home-educate me as
well. You should have seen the look she gave me. I can't think of
anything worse than being stuck at home with those two.

25th November
(Sunday)

Lesley's
Journal

I managed to
find out his name. Lance. Jesus - Lance! Poor sod. Still he is
seriously nice. I haven't managed to talk to him yet. Orange said
he was really sweet. Trust her to get in there first.

DECEMBER

6th December
(Tuesday)

Lesley's
Journal

I thought this
home-schooling idea was crazy. But I'm beginning to like it. I
don't have to worry about Jamie showing me up at school anymore.
Plus he's not being as big a prat as he used to be. He's still as
boring as hell - going on about trams all the time. But he doesn't
go off on one as often as he used to. I haven't seen him lose it
for a couple of days. It used to be every couple of hours. My
computer was on the blink today. I think Courtney sent me a virus
in an email. I was dreading asking Jamie for help. I was expecting
the usual abuse. But he sorted it out and didn't even complain.

7th December
(Wednesday)

Lesley's
Journal

Big
news!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lance has
friended me on Facebook - YEAH!!!

18th December
(Sunday)

Jamie's
Diary

It’s been ages
since I wrote in this diary. I had forgotten all about it. Mum said
I had to tidy my bedroom ready for Christmas. I found the diary
under my desk. I asked mum if she still had her diary. She said she
thought she probably had it somewhere.

A lot of things
have changed since I wrote the last entry on Bonfire Night. I don’t
go to Armthorpe anymore. I don’t go to any school at the moment. I
am home-educated. Mum teaches me. I’m not sure mum knows what she
is doing though. She isn’t qualified to be a teacher. She tries to
make all the lessons fun. I know more about some of the subjects
than she does. She doesn’t try to teach me ICT – that would be
funny.

I usually have
two or three different lessons every day. I suppose all the work I
do now is homework. I don’t have to do it in the evenings though. I
don’t do all of the subjects I used to do at Armthorpe. We go out
some days on field trips. I enjoy those. I also meet some other
kids who are home-educated. Some of them are okay, but most of them
are pretty boring. Mum said I might go back to proper school again
next year. As long as it isn’t Armthorpe it might be okay. I told
mum that I would rather go to a small school where we don’t have to
keep changing classrooms, and where the teachers know how to mark
properly.

One week from
today it will be Christmas day. I can’t wait. I will be getting a
few model tram kits. I made sure I gave everyone a copy of my
Christmas list, so I shouldn’t get any rubbish presents this year.
Nana Edith doesn’t come over to our house anymore, but mum said
Nana will still buy me a present. She said Nana will give it to
dad, and he will give it to me. I haven’t bought mum or dad
anything for Christmas yet because they still haven’t told me what
they want. They had better hurry up, or they will end up without
any presents.

I have finished
home-school now for the Christmas break. The best thing about
home-school is that I don’t have any stupid homework to do over the
holiday. I don’t envy the kids who are at Armthorpe. I bet they
have tons of homework to do. I am going to spend all of the
holidays building and painting my models, reading my books and
going on the Internet.

Merry
Christmas!

*****

Angela's
Diary

Jamie reminded
me about this diary. I had tried to erase it from my memory. I
nearly threw it away in November, but something must have made me
hold on to it. Flicking back through the pages makes painful
reading.

In the days
immediately following my last entry, I spent a lot of time talking
to Joe Peters and Mary. They made me realise things weren’t going
to improve – or at least not very quickly. I didn’t see how I could
wait around for an assessment. I dread to think what might have
happened to Jamie in the meantime. I think I was on the edge of a
breakdown too.

I wanted to
take Jamie out of school, but I didn't even know if it was legal to
do it. The parents at the support group were great. Quite a few of
them had already been through it. The law doesn't require that a
child be send to school. It does require that they receive an
education. That can be at school or otherwise. That is what I am
doing - educating Jamie - otherwise. It turned out to be really
simple. I just pulled Jamie out of school, and wrote a letter to
the school confirming that I was de-registering him.

I don’t think I
have ever been as terrified in my life. Everyone, except Joe and
Mary, said I was mad. I went to see the headmaster. He didn’t want
me to take Jamie out of school, but he still wasn’t offering any
kind of help. If anything, he made it even more obvious that he
thought the problems were all down to me. Jackie said she thought I
was out of my mind. She couldn’t understand how Jamie could be so
unhappy. Michael was having a great time. Even Andrew was against
it. We had a number of massive arguments. In the end, I told Andrew
the only way I would leave Jamie in Armthorpe was if he agreed to
take Jamie to school, and collect him every day. He said he
couldn’t because he had to go to work. I wish he could have tried.
He would soon have changed his mind. I can’t even begin to describe
the falling out I had with Edith. Let’s just say she doesn’t come
over any more. Andrew goes to her house every other week for his
Sunday lunch.

Everyone asked
me the same questions. How was I qualified to teach Jamie? What
about his socialisation? I had asked myself the same questions a
thousand times. The truth is I don't have a formal teaching
qualification, but I knew I could give Jamie a better education
than he was getting at Armthorpe. I couldn’t even get him through
the school gates there. I knew I would have to find ways to get him
to socialise, although I figured he had done precious little of
that when he was at school anyway.

Joe Peters has
been a great help with the home-education. He gave me the benefit
of his experience with Helen. He convinced me not to worry about
trying to cover every subject taught in school. Instead we
concentrate on the core subjects: English and maths. I managed to
persuade Andrew to cover the maths in the evening. I design lessons
around something that Jamie is interested in. So, for example, we
will use trams to discuss physics, maths and even history. We don’t
do any foreign languages, and we can’t do any complicated
experiments. We have worked through the simple experiments in
Jamie’s chemistry set, which I bought as an early Christmas
present. Jamie has always been smart, and he picks up most things
really quickly provided he finds the subject interesting. If he
isn’t interested in a subject, then that is a different matter.
It’s still trial and error at the moment, and I wouldn’t pretend
that I have all the answers yet. What I know for certain, is that
Jamie is so much happier. Most of the time, he is a pleasure to be
with. We actually have a laugh and a joke. He still has his
moments, and he will occasionally get nasty. That happens far less
often than it used to. I keep the lessons short because if I try to
do too much Jamie loses focus and can get irritable.