ATONEMENT (39 page)

‘
…
feels like a heart attack…fell in too deep…it’s killing me…never knew love
…
would hurt this bad…worst pain that ever had…
can’t think about giving it up…
never knew love would feel like a heart attack…
’

Who was she crying for, who was the man causing her heart to convulse in this pain? She couldn’t answer
anymore;
all she wanted was the comfort of Nico’s arms and his caresses. His hands lifted her by the waist, carrying her against him, his head tucked at her breasts hurting too. She could tell. They were in hell together for their sins
. S
he kissed at his neck, rubbed the muscles protruding from his upper back, clung to him for wisdom
and life.

Nico carried her up the stairs to the bedroom and lay her down on the crumple
d
sheets where he’d slept last night, thinking of her
and
in pain over having to leave and now she was here. He was kissing her through the salty tears,
ripping
away at his clothing, discarding hers with equal ferocity, until they were joined flesh to flesh and she became part of
him. She
gripped and pulled at the sheets as he loved her with such unconcealed
lust
Selange’s lips
parted for air.

               
         
CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Matteo
was a man in
the garden of temptation. Nude women swirled, flirted and some were bold and kissed his mouth, but he pulled away laughing, flattered yet uncomfortable with such an intimate act. He preferred they place their lips on other places. His mouth was reserved strictly for
Amelda
.

Giuseppe certainly didn’t mind and his display would have been shameful, if he had a wife. The other degenerate groom’s men followed suit, pulling women on to their laps,
groping
them like
schoolboys who never had pussy. Alfonzo waved away a woman, not bothering to show his disgust. The last thing he wanted was a mindless roll in the sack with a paid escort.
Domingo was having a good time, at least.

The rum found its way down into his empty stomach, settling there and he reclined on the
leather sofa disinterested in everything. 

“Hard to celebrate someone else’s happiness when you’re completely miserable, isn’t it?” He heard
Matteo
say above his head
shortly after he decided to nap
.
.

Alfonzo sat
forward;
he was being a spoiler and tried to shake off the depression. “Hey, what
happened
g
ot tired of the blonde trying to tongue you?”

Matteo’s
smile was that of a playboy, “Had many like her before, the
y
begin to
blend into one
familiar
liquid drink after a time. I have no desire for anyone other than
Amelda
. We
are a potent
mix
.
”

Alfonzo scoffed, he’d thought the same thing about Selange.

“See,
Amelda
is not perfect, neither am I. She’s a woman, one who holds my attention longer than any, not only in the bedroom but also in conversation. When I grow old I want a woman who if we are unable to have
sex then
our communication is sensual poetry and stimulating.”

The statement
slapped him
; t
he poetry part. He thought of Selange.

“I do not offer advice to a man unless asked but seeing you
here;
it is obvious you are in love with your wife. If she has never hurt you like this before and is truly sorry, perhaps forgiveness can be granted.”

“How do
I
forgive
this…when it’s killing me thinking about her and Nico
?”

The men were
hav
ing a raucous
good time
, oblivious the
ir
guest of honor was not partaking in the
celebration;
instead he took a seat beside Alfonzo
, f
olded his leg over his knee, reclined and stretched his arms on the sofa. He watched the women, throwing themselves at his drunken friends and relatives, smiling at how silly the men looked.

“
I have been an ass many times over, secretly I am still an ass.” He smiled, “I know it is hard to love someone like me. I travel, enjoy flirtation and I’m accustomed to getting what I want. Money spoils men, it makes them arrogant. I am all these things.
-And
for extra
measure
I am a
Mafioso
.
I command, demand, and condemn with one…” he snapped his finger, “snap of
my
finger.”

“Hmm.”

“
Amelda
is not
docile or untouched, because I am none of those. The beauty of marrying a woman is she is a woman and not a girl
. I
f
Amelda
had been young and inexperienced I would wait, let her blossom and learn her likes and dislikes. Have relationships in order to compare and contrast, so when she comes to me, she comes as a woman who knows what she wants
and finds me the best of the bunch
.” He uncrossed his leg, “Ironic, women can forgive us worse, yet we are have large egos and will lose so much to keep it. Ah! But I have talked enough. I must go and play, squeeze a tit or two and not offend my best man.”

Alfonzo sat there as
Matteo
laughed, stood then with his playboy smile took the hand of one of the women and they danced. And just as he said, he squeezed the woman’s breasts, even kissed it and all was well with him and Giuseppe.

Alfonzo finally got his ass off the couch and decided to leave his baggage there. He wouldn’t k
iss any of the women, but dancing, well he could do that. After-all he was Latino.

           
        
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Selange
opened her eyes to a wonderful vision. The dark Sicilian with the usually somber expression was smiling down, his deep eyes caressing her. He smelled of soap and she gathered he bathed after she’d fallen asleep. She smirked, vanity causing her to rake her hands through her wild hair as she slid up, “I must look a sight.”

His head lowered to her stomach and
he pecked circles a
top her skin
which caused her to giggle before looking at her,
“You have no idea
how
sexy
you
are
do
you?”

“You’d say anything, you big flirt!”

He hoisted her out of bed and she wrapped her legs around his waist laughing as he kissed her throat, squeezed her buttocks and sighed, “I got to get you back soon…in the meantime…”

He was carrying her to the bathroom. She smelled a delicious aroma of lavender and turned her head to see what he’d done as she dozed.
“Nico, wow!”

Candles lined the counter, the tub was filled with bubbles
and beside it a tray filled with fruits,
hors d’oeuvres and a cup of steaming tea.

“Like?”

“Did you order the food?”

“This place doesn’t exist.”

Her mouth formed into an
O
.

“I do cook.”

He placed her gently in the tub and sat on the edge
. He
reached for a basket
which was filled with
various
loofahs
for
her to choose from. She
picked the
tan sea sponge. She liked the feel of them better than the synthetic mesh ones.

As she rubbed it over her arms he watched.

“I remember those burns last time you cooked
.
I see you’ve gotten better in the kitchen.”

The reference to the burns he received brought a tug
to
his mouth but nothing else. He’d told her he
’d
got
ten hurt
during a culinary chore but he lied. They were the result of an explosion during one of his jobs.

Her long lashes were pressed against the apex of her cheeks as she reclined, “Umm, this feels so nice.”

“Open your mouth…no keep the eyes closed.”

She did and he p
ut
a grape on her tongue. She chewed and this is how he fed her, smiling at how easily she adapted to the pampering. He would gladly spoil her the rest of his days if he could, unfortunately his days were numbered and she was the reason. Last night, he
walked away and meant to keep his
distance that
is until he called Sophie. When she told him about how sickly Selange appeared
and
she wasn’t eating, he broke yet another promise and made contact. Seeing the vitality return to Selange’s face and the joy leaping from her spirit; he’d break a million promises because the one that mattered was her happiness and the baby.

Suddenly she slid under the water then leaped up shaking water all over him laughing. He grabbed a towel as she stood and wrapped it around her glistening skin. “Okay,
now I have to get you home.”

“Oh, but this is fun.”

The smile faded from Nico’s mouth, “
You can stay but if you do
,
you kill any chance of getting back with your husband, you know that?”

She pondered the question. If there was even a smidgeon of hope they could reconcile, she’d take it. She hadn’t stopped loving Alfonzo. The crazy thing is she loved Nico almost as much. Then it was the issue of the children; if she stayed with Nico then her children must be right by her side. They were a package deal, but of course Nico already understood this, didn’t he?

“What do you want, Nico?”