Autumn Lover (25 page)

Frowning, thinking hard, Hunter continued to stroke Elyssa’s hair and back. Slowly the tremors were leaving her body.

“Feeling better now?” Hunter asked gently.

She nodded.

One of Hunter’s hands fitted itself beneath Elyssa’s chin. He tilted her face up so that she couldn’t avoid his eyes.

Elyssa’s body stiffened. Despite Hunter’s tender care, he was furious with her.

“If you ever pull a damfool stunt like that again,” Hunter said in icy, precise tones, “I will peel you like a grape. You had no business leaving the house alone and you know it!”

Using the last of her strength, Elyssa started to push herself away from Hunter.

For an instant Hunter’s arms closed more tightly around her. Then, reluctantly, he let her go.

“What I do is my business, not yours,” Elyssa said.

The declaration was ruined by the hoarseness in her voice.

“Not after last night,” Hunter countered, his voice low and furious.

Elyssa blushed scarlet and stumbled to her feet.

“Last night gives you no rights over me,” she said through her teeth.

“The hell it doesn’t.”

Hunter came to his feet with a strength and grace that made Elyssa want to shoot him where he stood.

“You could be pregnant,” he said. “Remember?”

“A gentleman wouldn’t—”

“Hunter!” Morgan called from beyond the reeds, interrupting Elyssa’s low, angry words. “Where are you?”

Hunter’s whistled shrilly.

“I’m not a gentleman,” Hunter said softly. “I proved that last night when I hurt you. I’m sorry about that, Sassy.”

Sassy.

“I hate that name,” she said.

“Why? It suits you.”

“Just like ‘fancy man’ suits you.
Now
.”

Hunter’s mouth flattened.

Elyssa went to Leopard. She tried to mount, but her
body betrayed her. Her legs were like string.

With easy strength Hunter picked up Elyssa and dumped her in Leopard’s saddle.

A moment later Bugle Boy pushed into the small clearing among the reeds, summoned by Hunter’s whistle.

Hunter went to the Indian girl and began making signs. She watched intently, hesitated, and made the sign for yes.

Very gently he picked up the girl and her baby and placed them in Bugle Boy’s saddle. Then he swung up behind her, took the reins, and headed out of the marsh.

When Hunter looked over his shoulder, Elyssa was gathering her reins with fingers that were visibly uncertain. Hunter wanted to go to her, to pull her in his arms and hold her, simply hold her, reassuring both of them that she was still alive.

But Hunter had seen the shame and defiance in Elyssa’s blue-green eyes. He knew that she would go for his face like a cat if he tried to touch her.

Well, soldier, you got what you wanted
, Hunter told himself bitterly.
She no longer looks at you with admiration and desire. And she sure as hell isn’t building dreams around one Hunter Maxwell anymore.

That’s what I wanted, isn’t it?

Isn’t it?

The question echoed in Hunter’s mind through the ride back to the ranch.

It’s better this way
, Hunter told himself many times.
We’re all wrong for each other. She’s too young.

The image of Elyssa racing at breakneck speed to save the Indian girl and her baby lanced through Hunter’s mind, reminding him that age had little to do with bravery. During the war, he had seen boys do what had to be done at a time when seasoned soldiers turned pale and shook.

Too bad Belinda didn’t have as much courage in her whole body as Sassy has in her little finger
, Hunter thought painfully.
Ted and Em might be alive today
.

The thought was like a knife twisting in Hunter’s soul. He had let lust choose his wife, and his children had paid.

It still wouldn’t work
, Hunter told himself fiercely.
Brave or not, Sassy is still too young to know her own mind. When the babies started coming along, she would be like Belinda, always hungering for the butterfly life she left behind
.

It’s better this way
.

It has to be
.

There’s no going back
.

Yet the pain Hunter had caused Elyssa gnawed on his soul as mercilessly as his hunger for her. The shock waves of a single, shattering truth kept shaking him.

Elyssa had been a virgin when she came to his bed.

And an angry, humiliated woman when she left it.

B
roodingly Hunter stood in the doorway and watched while Elyssa cared for the Indian girl and her baby. Even three days after the skirmish with the Culpeppers, Hunter still went cold when he thought how close Elyssa had come to dying.

Every time he closed his eyes, he relived again the horrible moment when he realized that he would be too late to save Elyssa from the murderous Culpeppers.

Nor had Case found out who did save her.

That ghost is going to be the death of us
, Hunter thought grimly.

“That’s the way,” Elyssa encouraged the girl. “The baking soda will ease his rash.”

The Indian girl gave her a brief, shy smile and resumed washing her baby in the shallow basin.

Penny bent over the little scrap of humanity and made cooing noises. The baby watched her with curious black eyes.

“How old do you think he is?” Penny asked.

“Barely two weeks,” Hunter said.

Elyssa’s hands jerked. She hadn’t realized that Hunter was in the kitchen.

Lately it seemed that every time she turned around, Hunter was there, watching her with stormy gray eyes.

“What about her family?” Penny asked.

“Ute, as Sassy suspected. Right, Sassy?”

The tone of Hunter’s voice told Elyssa that he was using the nickname to get under her skin.

The more she avoided him, the more he dug at her.

“Right,” Elyssa said tersely.

She shook out a fresh diaper with a vigor that made the cloth snap. In front of other people she couldn’t ignore Hunter as she wanted to. He took advantage of that, forcing her to speak to him when she plainly didn’t want to.

“Sassy thinks the girl is related to a chief,” Hunter continued, “because of all the beads and shells on her clothes.”

“So I heard,” Penny said.

Elyssa finished folding the diaper and reached for another. Not once did she look at Hunter.

“I’ll do that,” he said, reaching past Elyssa. “I’ve folded more diapers in my time than you have.”

“It’s not necessary,” she said tightly.

Elyssa flinched when Hunter’s hand brushed over hers.

“It’s very necessary,” he said in a low voice.

Before Elyssa could retreat, Hunter deliberately repeated the small, tender caress. Shocked, she looked up at Hunter.

Angry words died on her lips when she saw the bleak memories in his eyes. She knew he was thinking of his own dead children.

The realization stripped away Elyssa’s anger at Hunter, leaving only her raw hurt and vulnerability.

I was truly a fool to think that my love would make a difference to Hunter
, Elyssa thought sadly.
His heart is buried with his children
.

I’ve been a fool about him from the very first, seeing
what I wanted to see instead of what was right in front of my face
.

“I’ll work on supper,” Elyssa said, turning away.

“I’ll do that, Sas—er, Elyssa,” Penny said, correcting herself quickly. “The girl is more comfortable when you’re around.”

Elyssa started to object, but it was too late. Penny was already on her way to the kitchen. Elyssa and Hunter were alone but for the Indian girl, who knew no English.

Or admitted to knowing none.

Hunter shook out a piece of soft cloth and folded it deftly.

“You’re better at it than I am,” Elyssa said, determined to keep the conversation impersonal.

“I’ve had more practice than you,” Hunter said. “Belinda didn’t have a whole lot to do with babies.”

“Just one more way I’m like your late, unlamented wife,” Elyssa said bitterly before she could think better of it. “That must comfort you no end.”

Hunter shot Elyssa a narrow, sideways glance.

“Does that mean you’re finally ready to stop running and talk to me about the night we—” he began.

“Did Case find out any more about the girl?” Elyssa asked quickly, talking right over Hunter.

The last thing Elyssa wanted to do was talk about the unsettling night when Hunter had taken her virginity in a storm of lust.

I offered
, she reminded herself harshly.
Much as I’d like to heap all the blame on him like a hail of stones, I can’t
.

“The Culpeppers happened on a small Ute hunting camp,” Hunter said. “Most of the warriors were off fighting the army. Damned hotheads should have been home protecting their own women and kids.”

Elyssa looked at the Indian girl. If she understood what was being said, she didn’t show it.

“The Culpeppers shot up a few boys,” Hunter said, “grabbed the girl, and ran off before the hunters could return.”

“Did Case learn her name?”

“The Culpeppers never asked it,” Hunter said.

“Not surprising. Men with lust on their mind don’t much care about the name of the girl who—”

Elyssa’s words stopped on a sharply indrawn breath. Hunter’s fingers were clamped around her wrist with a force just short of pain.

“Don’t you dare compare what happened between us to what the Culpeppers did to that poor girl,” Hunter said in a soft, deadly voice.

“Let go of me.”

The pressure on Elyssa’s wrist didn’t lessen.

“You bathed her,” Hunter said. “You tended her fever. You saw what those animals had done to her.”

His eyes were brilliant slits of gray. They were radiant with a rage and frustration that was almost tangible.

For days Hunter hadn’t been able to get close enough to Elyssa to talk to her, much less to touch her. Whenever he appeared, she faded like a ghost into the shadows.

Hunter felt like he had spent his life looking at Elyssa’s back as she retreated from him.

“If you hadn’t been a virgin, you never would have felt a bit of pain and you damn well know it,” Hunter said savagely.

“Do I?” Pointedly Elyssa looked at her wrist. “You’re hurting me now.”

“No, I’m holding you, and you know that too. Say it, Sassy. Say that you know I never meant to hurt you.”

“My name is
Elyssa
.”

The grip on her wrist changed subtly. She was still caged by Hunter’s strength, but it was different now. Almost caressing.

And then it was frankly caressing.

His fingertips traced the veins on the soft inside of Elyssa’s wrist with the delicacy of a kiss. Once, twice, three times, until her heart was beating so rapidly she was certain he could feel it racing.

“Hunter…” Elyssa whispered. “Don’t.”

She felt the shudder that went through Hunter when she spoke his name. Slowly he lifted her wrist and put his lips where his lips where his fingertips had been. The tip of his tongue traced the veins with aching restraint.

Elyssa made a small sound and shivered very much as Hunter had.

“Stop running from me,” Hunter whispered against Elyssa’s soft skin. “I’ll make it so good for you. I swear it, honey.”

The hungry response of her own body to Hunter’s caresses both shocked and infuriated Elyssa. She snatched back her wrist.

“Thank you for your generous offer,” she said with cool sarcasm, “but pain is an excellent teacher. I have nothing new to learn from you.”

“You have
everything
to learn from me.”

“Then I’ll go through life as ignorant as an egg.”

“Are you pregnant?”

The question hit Elyssa like a bucket of ice water.

“Are you?” he asked softly.

“Go to hell, Hunter Maxwell.”

“I have a right to—”

“How many mustangs are green-broke now?” Elyssa cut in. “Are we going to meet the army contract with the horses, at least?”

Hunter looked at Elyssa’s glittering blue-green eyes and clenched his jaw in frustration.

It had been the same for the past three days. If he cornered her into talking to him, she refused to talk about anything but business. He was fed up with it.

Hunter also was unsettled by his own relentless hunger for Elyssa. He had sworn never to let a woman have that kind of hold over him again, but Elyssa had made a mockery of his defenses.

Touching her right now had been a mistake. A bad one. The scent and softness of her skin had hardened his body in a rush of blood so fierce it made him light-headed.

It also made him angry with himself, with her, with everything.

“The Herrera brothers are breaking the last of the mustangs now,” Hunter said tightly.

Elyssa sensed the anger seething just beneath Hunter’s control. She gave him a wary glance. Between worrying about the ranch and worrying about facing him every minute of every day, she felt as tightly strung as a dance fiddle.

But at least Elyssa felt more certain of herself when ranch business was the topic of discussion.

You have everything to learn from me
.

Hunter’s flat statement echoed in Elyssa’s mind, unsettling her as much as the tender, incandescent caress of his tongue on her inner wrist.

“What about beeves?” Elyssa asked.

“We’re short.”

“Any chance of making it up?”

“We’re working on it,” Hunter said laconically.

“I’m aware of that. Will we make the contract?”

“One way or another.”

“What does that mean?”

Pointedly Hunter looked at the Indian girl and said no more.

Elyssa’s eyes widened slightly. Apparently Hunter, too, wondered just how much English the girl understood.

“The boys are combing the marsh in all the places
you showed them,” Hunter said. “Morgan and Johnny have the dogs working the high canyons.”

“I see.”

“You will,” Hunter vowed under his breath. “One way or another, if it’s the last thing I do on this blessed earth.”

A pink flush appeared on Elyssa’s cheeks. She suspected that Hunter wasn’t talking about cattle at all.

“If anything changes,” she said in a remote voice, “please advise me at once.”

“You’ll be the first to know. I guarantee it.”

That was one promise Hunter was looking forward to keeping.

But first he had to figure out a way to get Elyssa alone. He had to do it quickly, for his time on the Ladder S was running out. If Ab’s raiders didn’t attack soon, Hunter would have to go after them.

Then he and Case would go back to the Spanish Bottoms. The sooner they got there, the sooner the last of the Culpeppers who had raided in Texas would be brought to justice.

Standing just beneath the ridge overlooking Wind Gap, Hunter merged into the piñons and waited. All around him the night seethed with wind and the promise of rain.

A lark’s call sifted between the piñon boughs. Hunter returned the call as softly as it had come to him.

Case appeared in front of his brother.

“You keep riding your men so hard, you’re going to lose them,” Case said quietly.

“What does that mean?”

“Even Morgan is tiptoeing around you, and God knows he is a tough son.”

“How do you know what’s going on at the Ladder S?” Hunter retorted.

“Same way I know what it’s like in the Culpepper camp,” Case said sardonically.

“I’ve got a lot on my mind.”

“Yeah. Her name is Sassy. What went wrong with you and that little gal of yours?”

“She’s not mine,” Hunter said curtly.

“The hell she isn’t. She’s yours whether you’ve ever had her or not.”

Even in the uncertain moonlight, Case saw the change in Hunter’s expression.

“So that’s the way of it,” Case said quietly. “Is she pregnant?”

“It’s none of your damned business,” Hunter snarled.

“The last time you said that to me, I was telling you what a common piece of trash Belinda was.”

The frustration and anger in Hunter leaped without warning. He went after Case in an undisciplined rush. There was a short, sharp skirmish, but the advantage was all Case’s. He was in control of himself.

Hunter wasn’t.

Rather quickly Hunter found himself facedown on the ground, breathing hard, trying to buck Case off his back.

“Give it up,” Case said, increasing the pressure on Hunter’s neck and arm. “You’re the one who taught me this hold. You can’t break it without breaking your own stubborn neck.”

Hunter kept struggling.

“Damn it!” Case said. “Stop acting like a green kid. You weren’t the first man Belinda fooled, or the last.”

Abruptly, self-control returned to Hunter.

“Let me up,” Hunter said through his teeth.

“Not just yet,” Case said calmly. “First I want to know if I’m going to be an uncle any time soon.”

Tension snaked through Hunter’s body again, but he made no effort to throw off Case.

“I don’t know,” Hunter said.

“Ask Sassy.”

“I did.”

“And?”

“She told me to go to hell.”

Case muttered an indistinct word. An instant later he released Hunter. Simultaneously Case stood up in a lithe rush.

Warily he watched Hunter come to his feet. When Hunter showed no inclination to jump him again, Case let out a long breath.

“Sorry,” Case said quietly. “I thought you were just being pigheaded about Sassy, the way you were when you wanted Belinda.”

“And you told me she was a shallow little flirt.”

“She was.”

“I know. Now.” Hunter’s voice was both weary and bitter. “What a goddam shame it cost the lives of two fine children for me to find out what I had married.”

“Their dying wasn’t your fault.”

“That’s what I tell myself fifty times a day.”

“Do you believe it?”

“No.” Hunter hesitated, then said simply, “Thinking of them scared and hurting and crying for their daddy…It eats me alive.”

“So you’re going to spend the rest of your life punishing yourself, is that it?”

Hunter shrugged.

“You think that will make it right?” Case asked.

“I don’t know what I think. All I know is…” Hunter’s voice died.

“I’ll tell you what I know,” Case said. “You come to a point like a bird dog whenever Sassy is in sight.”

A hissing curse was Hunter’s only answer.

“Why don’t you marry her?” Case asked calmly. “The world needs more decent people. The two of you would have good kids.”

The sound Hunter made could hardly be called a laugh.

“Not Elyssa,” Hunter said bluntly. “Not with me.”