Awaken (The Awaken Series Book 1) (22 page)

“Sometimes.” He pressed play.

~~~~~

“Luna? Luna, snap out of it!” Mother’s voice jolted me to the present.
 

I shut my eyes, trying to hold on and listen to the melodic piano playing on Jasper’s laptop.

“Luna!”

“Shut up!” I exploded. My eyes came into focus to see the stunned faces of my mother and sister staring back at me. Megan’s mouth hung open, her fork dropping a glob of spaghetti back onto her plate. A vein in Mother’s neck stuck out, her lips tightened into a straight line. Father was working late tonight, so it was just the three of us.

“Excuse me?” Mother asked.
 

“This is your fault!” I wanted to scream. “You let him do this to me!” I wanted to throw it in her face and watch her crumble. I wanted to explode, but no words came out. This was all because of Tomlinson and his manipulation, and I was all too done with my family acting like it was okay. They sat back and watched as my own mind was put into the shredder—tearing it apart until there was nothing left.

“I apologize,” I finally mumbled. “I have a migraine.”
 

Mother just looked at me for a few long seconds before getting up from the table, returning with a fat pain-reliever pill.

I took it from her palm. “Thank you. May I be excused?” The second Mother nodded her consent, I was standing and heading for the stairs.

 
I clicked the door shut behind me and collapsed on my bed. I stared up at the ceiling, calmly waiting for my memory to return.

It did.

~~~~~

“Beautiful,” I said.
 

The piano was truly captivating, the melody fading in and out, speeding up and slowing down.

Then Jasper started to sing. His voice was smooth and resonating, the words somehow lost as I paid attention to the haunting melody. I looked over at him beside me, but he was staring out the window.
 

I focused on the lyrics: “I’m not lost, but I’m not sure where I am. You might see me, darling, but I’m not really there.”

“This is amazing,” I breathed. I smiled softly, trying to get Jasper to meet my eyes. He needed to know that I heard him—he might have been lost before, but he wasn’t now. I could see him; he was really there.

“I sound like a stereotypical angst-y teenager. There’s no substance,” he muttered.
 

“Jasper. Listen to me,” I begged. “Look at me.” Jasper turned his head, searching my face like it could present him with the answers he needed. “Everyone feels lost, but that doesn’t invalidate anything that you feel.” Jasper remained silent. “This is seriously amazing. You’re so talented.”

The next song began to play, this one faster and more demanding. A bass guitar accompanied the keyboard in an intricate weaving of harmonies.

“This is what I was meant to do, Luna,” Jasper finally said. “Can’t you understand that?”

“Of course I can. I—”

“Then why is it so hard for you to understand that I can’t stay here?” Jasper interrupted. “I can’t stay in a place that suppresses who I am.”

I could feel my heart shattering in my chest. It was a terrible, disturbing feeling. My chest felt like it was imploding—a tangible, physical ache. Jasper had to leave, but I needed to stay.

“How would you leave?”

“I’ll ask the Council. They force people out all the time. If I wanted to leave, I don’t see why they would stop me.”

I remembered what May had told me about her friends that had made a similar request. They came back with their minds completely changed. May said it had been “a complete one-eighty.” Whatever the Council had done to intimidate them, I doubted Jasper would be immune to that same power.

“When?” I asked. I was screaming at myself internally: Tell him! Warn him! Selfish, selfish, selfish!

“Come with me,” Jasper pleaded. “I have arranged a meeting with them Friday.”

“What?” I stood up. “Friday? Were you planning on sneaking away? Were you even going to tell me?”

“Of course I was, don’t be ridiculous.”

That was when I decided to commit the most selfish act against Jasper I could think of. I was going to let him fall into the Council’s trap.

“You can tell me how the meeting goes Friday night.”

~~~~~

Aunt May was acting more and more strange as time went on. The mysterious phone calls kept coming, and she was acting awfully sentimental. She kept asking me about the future, about Jasper, and about my journaling. I was in no mood to talk about the previous two topics, but I gladly discussed my newfound love for writing prose.

I told her that I would let her read some of my stories the next time I saw her, and my beautiful aunt started to cry.
 

“What’s wrong?” I asked. A few fat tears rolled down her face, and I was so surprised that I struggled to know how to comfort her.

“Nothing, dear. I’m just really happy you’re finally discovering who you are.” May smiled, and I laughed nervously.

“Um… thanks.”
 

Aunt May was keeping something huge from me, and I was desperate to figure out what it was.

“Sorry, I must sound crazy right now.” May laughed, wiping the tears from her face.

“Yeah, a little,” I said, keeping my tone joking. I glanced at the clock, standing up quickly when I realized the time. I told my parents I was staying after school for tutoring, and it was past time for when I was supposed to be home. “I have to go. Can we meet tomorrow at four?”

“Yes, but I have to be somewhere at five,” Aunt May replied, her voice cracking.

She stood up and wrapped me in a hug. I was starting to feel extremely uncomfortable about all of these signs. What were they pointing to? What was I missing?

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she whispered as she pulled away. She forced a smile—a smile so full of sorrow and regret, yet determination shining through the cracks. Aunt May was going through with whatever she was crying about, and nothing was going to change her mind.

Today is the day I will confront Councilman Tomlinson. Today is the day I will find out
why
.

“Luna? Are you ready to go?” Mother called from downstairs.

I slipped into a professional-looking navy skirt and tucked in my white blouse. I then slid my feet into terribly uncomfortable shoes that Mother all but forced me to wear. I could already feel blisters forming as I wobbled down the stairs, clutching the banister as I went.

“You look ridiculous,” Mother said from the front door. I could tell she was holding back laughter, and I shot her a look of irritation.

“I told you I was bad with heels,” I retorted.
 

“Go change. Wear some black flats or something.”
 

I let out a breath of relief. “Thank God,” I muttered. I unbuckled and stepped out of the shoes in a hurry.

“Thank who?” Mother asked, cocking her head. I thought about it for a moment, realizing that I had just repeated something I always heard Jasper say. I honestly had no clue who I was thanking.

“Um, never mind. I’ll go change.” I carried the heels up the stairs, a sinking feeling in my chest at the thought of Jasper.

~~~~~

I sat in Mother’s office, my stomach churning as I ran through how I was to confront Tomlinson. The fear of wasting the opportunity when it finally presented itself weighed heavily on my mind. Did I really have the courage to go through with this? If I approached Oportet’s leader, the man who, with the wave of a hand, had the power to wipe my entire mind, would I really be able to use my words the right way?

Mother was typing away on her computer, her face rigid. She rubbed her eyes, her limbs moving in slow motion when the phone began to ring.
 

She took her time raising the phone to her ear, and I straightened up in my chair. I took deep breaths as I waited.

“I’ll send her down right away,” Mother said, sending a nod my way. She gave me a small smile, but I was far too nervous to do anything but breathe.

It will all be okay,
I told myself. I repeated the line in my head until it was nothing but a way to keep my mind distracted. I repeated it as I exited Mother’s office, as I waited in the elevator, and as I steered through the hallways of the vast government building.

The walls were white. The floors were white. It even smelled like
white
.

The Council members and close advisers—like my Father—were located in an annex that was attached to the main building. Before I could pass through the connecting hallway, I would have to face the Council’s relentless security system.

There were three armed guards positioned there now, and the one manning the electronic, steel doors leading to the Council’s headquarters looked up as I approached. The other two were stationed at either side of the doors, their faces stone-like.

“Name?” the guard at the desk asked me.

“Luna Beckham.” The attempt to make my voice sound strong and purposeful only half-worked, making me sound more like an intimidated teenager.
 

The guard typed something on the large, sleek computer at his desk—technology like I’d never seen before. The man gave me a slight nod before typing something else on his computer, followed by a loud mechanical noise emanating from the Council’s building.

The steel doors glided open within seconds, and the two guards positioned in front of it moved to let me pass.

I took yet another deep breath and moved on through the doors. The connecting hallway was entirely concrete—and
dark
. The only light came from the flickering fluorescents positioned along the walls. At the end of the hallway was another set of guards, but only two this time.

In between the two guards was the large body scanner Father never stopped complaining about.

I could not help but feel awkward as I walked down the long hallway, the two guards focused on my approach. I suddenly had to concentrate to walk normally under their scrutiny. The sound of my feet hitting the concrete echoed dramatically against the walled enclosure.

“Step through,” one of the guards said when I reached the end. When I stepped into the machine, the guard studied the screen on the other side. Finding nothing incriminating, he signaled for the second guard to type a code into the wall next to the doors.

“Have a nice day, Ms. Beckham,” he said.
 

I did not have time to figure out how he knew my name before I was ushered through the second set of doors.

“Thanks,” I mumbled as I passed.

I was finally inside the Council’s main building. I took out the folded map from my pocket, studying the path marked in red that led to Tomlinson’s office. The offices of the councilmen were located in the very center of the building.

I made my way down the first hallway, turning left at the end, and then took an elevator to reach the second floor. In the elevator, a man in the corner was speaking into what appeared to be a small wireless phone. I did not think that those kinds of devices were allowed in Oportet. I glanced at it out of the corner of my eye, worried that the man would notice me staring. He was too caught up in his conversation to pay any attention to me, though.

The technology I had observed in the Council’s building and with the guards was far more advanced than the average citizen’s possessions. What was so dangerous about these slim and sleek phones and computers?

The elevator came to a stop at the second floor. I exited, leaving the man and his intriguing technology behind. Moving through this final hallway I passed a woman with some kind of gadget attached to her ear. She was speaking like she was in the middle of a conversation. I looked around the hallway to see if I was missing something, but the hallway was empty. The earpiece must have been yet another kind of exotic communication technology.

When I reached Tomlinson’s door, I paused a moment with my hand on the knob.
It will all be okay
, I repeated one final time.

I knocked three times and waited.

“Come in,” said a voice from inside. I turned the knob and entered, my heart ramping up to a dangerous pace.

I shut the door behind me and took in my surroundings. The office was much larger and more luxurious than Mother’s. Tomlinson sat at a large wooden desk, a full-sized bookshelf behind him. There was a leather couch to my left, leaning up against a red wall. I stood on an expensive looking carpet.

Tomlinson’s face was withered by age and stress. “Sit, Luna,” he instructed.
 

Something about the way Tomlinson commanded me brought all of my anger to the surface. The man who had caused me so much pain and confusion wanted me to sit before him and act calm and orderly, as if he hadn’t destroyed my relationship with Jasper or ripped away my past.
 

The time for pretending had passed. It was time I received the truth I had been craving since I regained my first memory.

“No. I’m fine standing.” Now I had his full attention.

Tomlinson studied my face, and a knowing smile reached his lips, like I was a petulant toddler who thought she had power over her parents.

“I can assume that you are not actually here to discuss your occupational decision, correct?” he asked.
 

The humor in his voice made me want to flip over his desk or break a lamp. It pushed me to throw the tantrum he obviously expected. It was because of this expectation that I managed to refrain.

“I want to ask you why you did what you did, and why you forced my family to lie to me about it. How did you manage to intimidate them into secrecy? Did you threaten them?”
 

Tomlinson leaned back in his chair, cocking his head to the side. “What is it that you think I did, exactly?” he said with a raised eyebrow.

“You forced me into a medical procedure to take away my memories, then you covered it up with the tale of a tragic
accident
!” I exclaimed.