Away (34 page)

“Yeah, uh, the brother is off limits. He’s not really talking to the family. We’ll have to work on the brother thing another time.”

“Fine,” she said. “I guess that’s just a chapter for another day, huh?”

“Exactly.”

“But, really? Code red clinger? Is that a new phrase or something?”

“It just kinda came out.”

“How about crazy-cock clinger? Maybe then we can call it a triple c threat,” she suggested.

“I’m not a triple c threat though. I’m just…” I hesitated, thinking of how to say it. I knew what it was, but the words were having trouble leaving my lips.

“I know,” she said. She and I both knew that this wasn’t just some triple c threat with Jason. This was so much more than that.

“It just breaks my heart. Someone so kind and gentle who has the heart of a saint is going through something like this.”

“Yeah,” she said. “It would take a saint to be able to handle all of it, though.”

“You always know what to say.”

“What are friends for?” she asked. “So now that we’re both extremely depressed, what do you say we go do some shopping?”

“I’ll get my purse,” I told her as we both got up from the bed.

After grabbing my purse and slipping on a pair of flip-flops, we headed to the next town to get our shop on. Melanie always had a way of knowing when to change the mood, not to mention finding ways to cheer us both up. As we drove down the street, I couldn’t help but think of how much I missed this, missed being with Melanie like we were in high school again. Things were changing though with a baby on the way, a life in Keaton that I had no clue what it held for me, and a guy who fought every day to keep himself healthy. One thing was certain, and that was Melanie. She would always be here and we would always have each other. For this, the smile on my face was permanent. I thought of all the reasons this amazing girl was more of a sister to me than any blood related one could ever be. I would let myself enjoy this afternoon with her and not think of the things going on in life that seemed to be so uncertain or sad.

Y
ESTERDAY
WENT
BY
TOO
FAST
. It was already morning and Mel was leaving. I knew I would see her again soon but it still didn’t make seeing her leave any easier. Even though she said her goodbyes and thank yous last night to Trish, Bart, and Jason, I still had to say goodbye.

I snuck upstairs so I didn’t wake Jason and met Mel upstairs before she left.

“This was a damn good time, Cass. I’m glad I came up.” The happy look on her face was forced. I knew she had a good time, but she was reluctant to go. I couldn’t blame her. I didn’t want her to go just yet either.

“Best time ever,” I said tearfully.

She grabbed her bag, and we quietly walked out of the house to her car. It was still dark, the sun soon to rise as we hugged goodbye on the curb. We pulled away with a single tear rolling down each of our cheeks.

“Goodbyes suck ass,” she said with a crack in her voice.

“Tell me about it,” I said. “Will you please call me the minute you get back to campus?”

“You know it.” She opened the driver side door and threw her bag on the passenger seat.

“Love you, Mel,” I said, my heart aching that she was leaving.

“Love you too, Mama.” She winked, sitting down in the seat as she closed the door.

I blew her a kiss, then walked into the house, and headed back downstairs.

Today was going to be a hell of a day. Not only did I have to say goodbye to my best friend, but I also knew Jason had dialysis today. I was bound and determined to go with him. I wanted to be there to support every aspect of what he was going through as much as I could. He was always supportive of me, and I wanted to do the same. I quickly brushed my damp hair and finished putting on my clothes before I left Jason’s bathroom. I decided to get ready before he could dispute me going with him. When I made my way to his room, his light was on and his door was cracked open.

“There she is,” he said to me as he pulled out some clothes from his dresser. “And she is already dressed.” He looked me over from head to toe, confusion plastering his face. “I was headed to the bathroom to go check on you. I thought you were getting sick again. Why are you already dressed?”

“You act like you’ve never seen me ready for the day,” I said as I walked by and put his shirt that I slept in by my suitcase.

“This early? No, I haven’t,” he said.

“I got ready early so I would be ready to leave when you are. I didn’t want to give you the chance to use that as an excuse.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I don’t want you to get mad or even argue with me about this, but I’m going with you today.”

He pushed his brows together as he looked at me, shutting the drawer he just pulled a pair of jeans from. “Going where with me today?”

“Dialysis,” I answered, walking over to his bed to sit down.

He was shaking his head and turned so he was fully facing me. “Absolutely not.”

While his voice was definitely not happy with what I told him, I couldn’t help but gawk at him standing in front of me. His bare chest and tight dark blue boxers had me so distracted. I couldn’t help but quietly giggle as my eyes caught focus of his morning wood.

“What’s so funny about that?”

I got up from the bed and walked over to him. “Nothing, just go shower.” I shot him a wink and headed for the stairs.

“You’re not going,” he shouted.

“Whatever you say, Jase,” I shouted back as I made my way upstairs.

I fully intended to go whether he approved or not. I opened the door at the top of the stairs and made my way to the front door. I grabbed his extra set of keys he kept hung by the entryway and went outside to wait for him in his truck.

“What are you doing?” he asked as he pulled his truck door open, his head shaking back and forth in apparent disapproval.

“I’m going. I’m supporting you, and I’m not getting out of this truck.”

“You’re stubborn,” he sassed as he sat down in the driver’s seat and closed his door.

“I learned from the best,” I said.

“Are you sure about this?” he asked as he started up his truck, the look on his face concerned. It was as if he had never had anyone want to be there for him before, which I knew was impossible. He had support all around him.

“Yes. Stop asking and just drive. I’m not leaving. Like I told you, you have me,” I said and reached for his cheek, rubbing my hand against his scruffy face. “I’m in this with you.”

He closed his eyes. I leaned over the emptiness between us and placed a kiss on his lips, surprising him as he opened his eyes suddenly. He pressed his lips harder against mine, kissed me back before pulling us out of the driveway, and heading to the hospital.

Trish wasn’t around as we walked through the front doors and headed down the hallway that led to the dialysis room. That hallway didn’t bring back good memories. In fact, I grabbed Jason’s hand and held it tightly until we got to the room.

“There he is,” an older lady said as we opened the door and entered the room.

I let go of Jason’s hand as he greeted the lady with a hug. “Colleen,” he said as he let go of her. “This is Cassandra.” I smiled as he pulled me up to his side.

“Cassandra,” she said, extending her hand out for me to shake. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

I met her hand with mine and shook it. “It’s nice to meet you, Colleen. Sorry for the–”

She put her hand up, cutting me off. “No need, Cassandra. I completely understand. This is hard for anyone to take.”

I gave her a grateful look. “Thanks.”

“She insisted on coming with me today,” Jason told her.

“Yes, I did. I’m here for support,” I told Colleen.

“You’re a lucky guy,” she said to Jason as she walked past him.

He looked over at me and mouthed ‘thank you’ before walking over to Colleen.

I watched him get his weight, blood pressure, and temperature checked. He was amazing. That was all there was to it. Three days a week was a lot for someone to have to do this. I felt a prickling pain in my chest as I thought of all the times that he told me he had to run an errand. Picturing him sitting here alone almost made me break into tears.

“Cassie?” I heard his voice yell to me. I looked over at him. “You okay over there?”

“Yeah, sorry.” I had to stop checking out mentally.

“I have a chair for you right next to Jason,” Colleen told me as she finished getting Jason set up in his chair that was next to a large machine.

“Thank you,” I said as I sat down in the chair next to Jason.

I watched as Colleen hooked two tubes in his arm. I closed my eyes, remembering when he told me about the scar. Clearly, it wasn’t accidental. It was purposeful and most definitely for his dialysis.

“All set, Jason,” she told him before walking away.

It was a lot to take in. The machine was huge. There were the tubes coming out of him and a large screen monitoring him as the blood flowed through the tubes. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat as I watched the screen on the machine.

“Don’t be afraid of it,” he said, interrupting my thoughts.

“It’s hard not to be,” I replied. “Is this why Anna broke up with you? Because she couldn’t handle seeing you like this?”

He shook his head as his eyes found mine. “No. Not even close, Sweetheart. She broke up with me because she couldn’t handle me holding her back because I was like this. She was selfish, and as much as she tore my heart to shreds, I’m grateful now because she made me feel like I was sick and breakable. Who wants to feel like that? You look at me like I’m stronger than any other person you’ve ever met, like I’m your hero.”

“Because you are, Jason. You are the strongest person I know. I couldn’t even fathom going through what you are, and still keeping a smile on my face. You’re a hero Jason.”

“Okay, if you two keep this up, I’m going to start bawling my eyes out,” Colleen told us as she came walking up to Jason. “But I see what you were saying, Jason. She’s a keeper,” Colleen said before walking to the other side of the room to look through a few charts.

It was time to change the subject; we didn’t need to make anyone cry today. I adjusted myself in the chair and looked over at Jason. “Thanks again for letting Mel come and for taking us out to dinner.”

“It was good to meet your other half,” he said. “She is a good friend for you. Not what I expected, but in a weird way, it works.”

“Her parents, while I love them because they are the opposite of mine, are part of the problem. They don’t really give two shits about their daughter. That’s why she went to college on the complete opposite side of the state.”

“That’s horrible,” he said.

“Yeah, but she is a tough cookie and she has me. To make sure she knows she is amazing. I’ll never let her down.”

“You are such a good friend,” he said. “What did you guys do yesterday before dinner? I forgot to ask you guys last night.”

“I had to tell her about you and that is something I don’t ever want to have to do again. I can
slightly
understand why you took so long.” I gave him an apologetic look. “Then we talked about the baby and went to the store you took us to when you bought my boots. She wanted a pair of black ones.”

“Ah, already starting a new trend with your friends. Look at what I’ve done,” he gloated.

I playfully rolled my eyes at him. “After the boots, we just literally talked the whole time. Even though we’ve talked over the phone, it’s always different in person. You can actually see the emotion and excitement on the other’s face. It was a much needed visit. Then we drove back and visited with your mom a bit, and then you came to take us to dinner. Sorry about the dinner conversation by the way.” I cringed as I thought about her mouth and the things she said. She always gives out too much information.

He let out a throaty laugh. “It was extremely entertaining. I especially enjoyed the commentary on her past boyfriends and their nicknames.”

“She has a way with words and happens to be missing a filter, but she means well. I know there is a good guy out there for her; she just hasn’t found him yet.” I couldn’t help but feel the butterflies releasing in my stomach as I thought of the guy I just found. I’m so lucky to have him in my life and to think, I wasn’t even looking.