BAD BOY ROMANCE: DIESEL: Contemporary Bad Boy Biker MC Romance (Box Set) (New Adult Sports Romance Short Stories Boxset) (6 page)

“You two kids crack me up. You’ve loved each other since you were kids. I think you can muster a better greeting then that.” Aunt Marina hit him in the back with a spatula, forcing him to walk forward towards her. Spencer’s amused chuckle reached her ears as he wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace. She could barely get her arms to do anything but lay limply across his back. She felt her heart skip a beat and then race unnaturally as her mouth became dry. He finally pulled away and then walked into the other room. She let out a sigh of relief that she hoped nobody noticed.

“See, now how hard was that?” Aunt Marina asked while pursing her lips before everyone began to filter out into the dining room. Kim was the last to follow, watching Aunt Marina’s eyes on the way out.  The woman looked like she was on a mission, and Kim was almost positive she knew what that mission had to do with.

Chapter 2

It was dark outside, and Kim had changed into a pair of sweatpants and put her hair up in a bun. Most of the younger guests were either gone to their own houses or playing upstairs in the den while her aunts and cousins and grandfather all played card games in the living room and laughed about the good old days. She hadn’t seen Spencer since dinner, which had been torture for her. Hints were continuously dropped about the fact that they all wanted to see her and Spencer together, and Spencer had looked rather smug at that turn of events. Kim couldn’t remember ever being truly angry at Spencer before, but she supposed there was a first time for everything.

Worst of all was that he seemed to still be avoiding her beyond large social groupings. He wouldn’t even look at her if they passed by each other. She wanted answers, and she wanted her friend back So, she decided she was going to find a way to get that.

She walked to the sliding glass door that led out to the backyard and peeked outside. She could see Spencer sitting out there, watching Alice’s little terrier run around to his heart’s content. Kim glanced back to make sure no one was paying attention in case they might come listen in before sliding the door open and shut very carefully. Spencer turned around to see who had joined him and then scowled before turning back around. Kim felt her face getting hot and her hands shaking with nerves, but she knew she had to do what she was about to do.

“Spencer,” she said, stepping in front of him, trying to sound commanding. She really just felt like a little mouse in front of a large cat, though. “We have got to talk about things at some point or they will never get better. You owe me as many explanations as I owe you.” She said the last part with confidence, her nostrils flaring.

Spencer shook his head and sighed. “I know you’re right, Kim and that you’re trying. But that doesn’t mean I’m okay with any of this. And I don’t need any explanations from you. Your lips on his seemed to be pretty clear to me. Don’t worry about our family. Most of them will forget about it in a couple weeks when you aren’t around to tease anymore.” His words came out with anger, but she could tell that he was feeling hurt and vulnerable. He was just getting defensive, and she felt so guilty for being the cause of her best friend’s pain.

“I’m glad things seem to be so cut and dry for you, Spencer. I’m surprised things haven’t turned out badly before now. How could I be so close to you and not know this side of you?” she asked coldly, placing her hands on her hips. By the startled look in his eyes, Kim could tell she finally had his attention.

“What is it you want from me, Kim?” He sounded so strained when he said it, and he ran his hands through his black hair in a stressed manner. She still found it hard to believe anyone could be so worked up over her.

“The first thing I want is an explanation of how the two of you could be stepbrothers and why you never mentioned it before. Then, we can get into what you were originally wanting to tell me about Diesel; what it is that you thought was so bad because the both of you seem to think that the other is dangerous. It’s only fair I find out why.” Kim was feeling stronger and more determined by the minute.

“Diesel thinks I’m dangerous?” Kim caught a hint of amusement in his question and took a step closer, snapping her fingers in front of his face. She didn’t like the way he was delaying. For a moment, an angry expression crossed his face that looked more frightening than she ever believed Spencer could be capable of. He snatched her hand, and she wondered what he was about to do. But he ended up kissing it and then just holding it there. The desperation in his eyes made her think twice about pulling it away. Maybe it would help her make her decision if she just let him be affectionate.

“My mother is not my birth mother, Kim. I’m pretty sure I mentioned it to you once. My birth mother had some problems with drugs and things and ran out on us a long time ago when I was really little. I met you right after my step mother and father got married. She also had a child from another marriage; that’s Diesel. He came for very rare visits during the summer or once or twice on Christmas, I think, but that was it. He lived with his father most of his childhood until he started getting into a lot of trouble. My mother being the loving forgiver she is, was happy to take him in when he was about fifteen or so. I didn’t like him or sharing him very much, so I just never talked about him with you. And he mostly kept to himself. Then, he started getting into big trouble and eventually landed himself in jail at 17. After another string of crimes, he finally came crawling back to my mother and father for help at around age 19 or 20, and my father decided he’d make a good member of The Shadows. Our connection is really that simple. He quickly became the favorite even though he didn’t live with us, and he worked his way up at the MC doing deplorable things. It’s one thing to partake in some creative accounting or provide drinks to these people, but to actually participate in the debauchery directly… And he seems to have no qualms about it. Being involved with him is bad for you and dangerous. The people he deals with and pisses off could easily harm you or him.”

Kim lightly tugged her hand away as he finished and looked at him thoughtfully. She felt like he truly believed the things he was saying, but they were clearly tainted by jealousy that went much farther back than herself. She had to find a way to hear both sides before she could decipher and decide anything about who she would trust or want to be with. “Thank you for that, Spencer. I appreciate it. I have a lot of thinking to do, and I think it’s only fair I ask you for one more thing, though you may not want to give it.” Kim rubbed her hands together nervously, understanding what his reaction would probably be. “I need you to give me a way to contact Diesel. It’s the only way I’m going to be able to make a fair decision between the two of you.” She closed her eyes and waited for his anger to come, but it never did.

“You know how I feel about you associating with him and how your family feels.” He had stood up while her eyes were closed and gotten really close so that his warm breath grazed her face. It was unnerving. “But if I am still in the running, I guess that’s better than what I thought before.” Kim opened her eyes to see a small smile spread across his face before he reached down to grab his phone. “I’m texting you his phone number but please don’t tell him where you got it. Things aren’t great with the family as it is.”

Kim nodded and walked around him and back into the house. She had a phone call to make. She took the stairs two at a time, feeling her heart racing at the thought of possibly talking to Diesel. She was both excited about hearing his voice and nervous about what he might say. The possibility he could still reject her was very real. Just because she would have Spencer to fall back on didn’t mean it wouldn’t sting.

She dialed the number on her phone just as she shut the door to the room she was staying in. She could faintly hear the children’s voices coming from the den drifting through the cracks in her door. After several rings she was ready to hang up, assuming he wasn’t going to answer, but then she heard his deep voice. “Hello?” Kim had to remind herself to speak as her mouth got dry with the nerves she was feeling. “Who is this?” he asked as her silence continued.

“Umm, it’s Kim.” She felt like she was twisting her tongue in knots as she stumbled over the words.

“Kim?” He sounded confused. Did he not remember her? How embarrassing was that? “I don’t mean to be rude, but I’m kind of surprised to hear from you.” Oh good, so he did remember her, at least. “A lot has happened, and I wasn’t sure if you even cared to talk to me again.” The conversation was not going like Kim had planned at all, and she had to stop it in its tracks.

“Wait. I called for a reason, and I don’t think this conversation is going in the right direction. There are some things I need to know, and while Spencer cleared a few things up for me, I want your side of things and definitely wonder about you were going to tell me about Spencer.” Her cheeks burned remembering her boldness that night; how she’d just gone ahead and kissed him.

“Look, I don’t want to put you in an awkward position, Kim. I know what your family thinks of me and that you’ve known Spencer most of your life. You don’t need to get stuck in our troubles with each other. I’m sure your judgment is just fine. I just felt like I needed you to know that he’s just not some innocent bystander in everything that goes on at the MC like he would like everyone to believe. I’m not one to talk, but that was it too; I wanted to speak up for my own self instead of you hearing things about me from others.” Kim felt he was being completely sincere, unlike Spencer.

“Well, that’s why I wanted to be fair. Thank you for sharing that with me,” Kim said softly. “I would have asked in person, but my grandfather is kind of treating me like a child and made me go to Chicago with him for a family thing. And just so you know, I’m sorry about what I did, jumping on you like that. I had no right. I don’t know where my head was at.”

“I’m not sorry.”

Chapter 3

The site of her home was a welcome one as the cab that held her, her grandfather and Spencer pulled up to it. Dealing with the extended family along with Spencer for almost a week had been emotionally and mentally draining to say the least, and she was ready to get the chance to relax and get back to being herself. Part of her realized that a piece of that would involve making a clear decision about Spencer and Diesel. And the truth was she felt like she had known her choice the whole time and just hadn’t allowed herself to make it clear to herself or to the men in her life.

Kim had been doing nothing but thinking and worrying the whole way back home, but now that she was home she was certain that her decision hadn’t changed. That was the only clarity being away for a few days gave her. She watched as Spencer sat her grandfather’s bags down as well as hers and stood around awkwardly. It was like he knew that the decision was coming soon. Her grandfather, however, was clearly still avoiding her. He walked through the room and didn’t even look at her. It was time for her to be honest.

“I think that we need to talk,” she said suddenly, causing both men to pause in their tracks. Spencer looked at her in anticipation while her grandfather just looked exasperated with her. Deep down she knew as much as she hated the idea she was going to have to find a way to get a job and move out before they ruined their relationship forever. “I have heard everything the both of you have said and taken it with a grain of salt, and the same can be said for anything anyone ha said on the subject. The truth is, though, that this is my life and my decision. I can’t let anyone push me one way or the other because it would be doing more than just myself a disservice. Who I fall for is ultimately not up to you, Papa, but I am so happy that you care for me enough to try and protect me. However, you are both trying to protect me from something that is inevitable; being involved with the MC.”

Kim paused and saw her grandfather staring at the floor and bracing himself on the back of the couch. She couldn’t read his mood, and she didn’t dare look at Spencer. He would certainly convince her to stop, which was something she couldn’t afford to do. “You are both involved and have been in my life forever and will continue to be, or at least I hope you will. You are both involved in my life and in the MC. So, that was never a sound argument against anything. What matters is what I feel inside, and Spencer…” Kim trailed off and turned to look at him, taking a deep breath. She was almost certain tears were beginning to form in her eyes because of what she was about to do.

Wanting that closeness to him that she might be missing for a while, she closed the distance between them and grabbed his hands, voice cracking as she continued. “You have been there for me all my life, and I never would have asked for anything different. In fact, I’d still love you to be there because I really do love you. You are handsome and so sweet and considerate, I am certain that any heartbreak you get from me will be wiped away the moment you meet a beautiful girl and sweep her off her feet. But the truth is, you deserve better than someone who has to
try
to fall in love with you. You need someone who is already there; who wants to kiss you every time she sees you and finds it hard to control her emotions around you. That is what I wish for you and cannot give you. And I am so sorry because I know that you would have been great to me.” Her hands and lips were trembling, and she was sure she detected a hint of tears building in Spencer’s eyes as well.

“I understand if you never want to see me or talk to me again,” she finished, searching his face for any sign of him being able to forgive her. She felt like she had spent so much time leading him on, and the guilt felt like bricks laying on her chest. Without any answer from Spencer, she dared to lean in and wrap her arms around him in a tight embrace, and to her relief he returned the hug. She could hear the tears in his voice as he whispered to her.

“I wish I understood why I’m not enough for you but he is. If there’s ever a day that you realize you made a mistake, I don’t want you to feel like you can’t come to me. That’s why I’m going to take some time to grieve you and then come back to being your best friend. That’s what love is.” Spencer pulled back from the hug and kissed her lightly on the cheek; a kiss she heartedly returned.

They both turned to look at Don who was red in the face like usual when it came to that subject. “She tried; you have to let it go now. She’ll be fine, and she’ll learn one way or the other,
Spencer told her grandfather, trying to diffuse the situation. Though, Kim swore she heard a bit of a threat in there. Her grandfather nodded and left the room, and Spencer gave her one last look before slinking out the front door.

Left alone in the silence of the living room that hadn’t been lived in for the past week, she had to confront what just happened. The pain was almost overwhelming, and her future seemed so up in the air. However, she knew that she had done the right thing by being honest before things got any worse between them. She wasn’t about to bulldoze a friendship because she couldn’t let Spencer down easy.

She began to pace back and forth, wondering what her next step might be. She hadn’t really thought the rest of it through. She knew what her choice was, but would it even matter? She pulled out her phone and ran through the contacts, landing on the one she was looking for. They hadn’t really talked since that night on the phone other than quick check-ins about how each other were doing. It was kind of lame really, but she was looking to change that.

Kim dialed the number feeling like there was nothing else left to lose. “Hello?” Diesel had picked up right away that time. Maybe that was a good sign.

“Hey, Diesel, it’s Kim. I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time, but I kind of had one more question for you.” Kim heard her own voice and felt annoyed with herself she was so terrible at flirting.

“And what’s that, Kim?” She loved the way he said her name, and she closed her eyes and enjoyed it for one short moment.

“I was actually wondering where you were right now so that we could talk.” How desperate and strange did that sound?

“I’m actually at my house,” he replied, making her mood drop. Of course he was, and no way was he going to invite her crazy self over there. He probably thought if she knew where he lived, she’d stalk him or something. Kim was about to cut her losses and hang up when he spoke again. “Would it be possible for you to come here? I don’t get to just hang here and relax often, and I’m kind of set on it.” He chuckled little into the phone, making her feel slightly more secure about the situation.

“Sure,” she answered maybe a little bit too quickly. “Just give me the address and I’ll be over there in just a bit.” Kim placed the phone on speaker to type the address he was spouting off into her GPS before politely thanking him and hanging up. She ran straight to her closet, suddenly concerned about what she might wear. She knew that she couldn’t get away with chilling with Diesel in her pajamas or sweats. She had to make an effort; especially considering she was about to clue him in on her feelings for him and try to convince him to feel the same way.

As she looked through her closet, she realized she didn’t need to look like she was trying too hard either, so she figured casual on top and sexy on bottom would be the best for the occasion. She pulled on a pair of black, torn up shorts and a belt with a pirate skull belt buckle over some old fishnets before placing a large flannel shirt over the vintage band tee she was already wearing. She finished it all off by redoing the eyeliner that she'd been wearing for the past 24 hours and her most comfortable pair of boots.

She grabbed the keys to the old clunker and practically ran out the door before her grandfather could get an idea of what she was doing. She was not in the mood to deal with that sort of confrontation at the moment. She needed to lift her spirits, and what better way was there than finally partaking in what her mind and heart had wanted for a while now?

Miraculously, as always, the old car rumbled to life, vibrating her body as she pulled out of the garage and out onto the road. She felt so on edge as she drove towards the address she had plugged into her GPS. There was still the chance of being rejected after everything she had just put herself and her family through, and it was quite unsettling.

Finally, she pulled up to his small but nice home, feeling impressed but a little confused about how normal it looked. Kim had been half expecting to find him living at a bar or in some old industrial building he’d renovated. In reality, he just lived in a typical urban building.

As she climbed out of the car, she smoothed her clothes back into place and attempted to calm herself to no avail. Her long hair blew back from her face as she approached his door and gave it a double knock.

Kim could hear the television blasting from inside and hoped he would hear her knocks. But sure enough, she heard the sound of it being muted and feet shuffling along tile just before the door clicked to signify someone unlocking it.

Diesel swung the door open and gestured for her to come in, but Kim felt like she had to walk through a field of molasses just to get there. he looked completely unlike the man she was used to seeing at the MC's hangout. His hair was wet and lying flat on top of his head, and it looked like he had missed a shave or two. He had on a tight tee shirt that showed off many of his tattoos as well as a pair of loose shorts that allowed her to see that he had tattoos encircling his ankles as well. He really did resemble a piece of art. She was certain women would pay a pretty penny to take a look at him in a museum.

Kim smiled nervously at the thought as she stood there awkwardly, wondering just how to go about telling Diesel she had chosen him. She bit her bottom lip and fidgeted. Diesel apparently noticed because he gave her a quizzical look before smirking at her in amusement. he so knew what looking at him did to her. how could he be so cruel as to tease her that way? "So, what brings you to my humble abode?" he asked, his eyebrow twitching upwards at her.

Kim was relieved when they both stayed standing because she knew if she sat down and got comfortable that the evening would begin and end in small talk.

"Actually, we all just got back from Chicago not too long ago."

"Well, it was so nice of you to think of me so quickly. Then again, I'm sure you've already had your chance to see Spencer." The words came out sounding bitter, and Kim felt uncomfortable with him even being brought up after what she'd just had to do to him. "I'm sorry. that was uncalled for," Diesel apologized.

"Actually, you're right about me seeing Spencer first, but that was mostly because he came home with us. It was easier to tell him first." Kim suddenly felt that pull he often had, like a string connecting the two of them getting shorter as his eyes met her and sparkled with a question.

"And how did you tell him you felt?" It was the first hint of true vulnerability he’d felt on since she had met him, and she wasn’t about to prolong the moment any ore. She took several steps closer so that they were only about a foot apart.

"That he was my best friend and I didn’t want to lose that. He deserved better than me because I couldn’t feel about him the way I feel about..." Kim trailed off, not needing to finish the statement. As their eyes locked again, she knew that he knew what she meant. he instantly closed the distance between them and placed his lips desperately on hers. His hand held her head to him, not letting her go. She knew instantly that the whole time he must have felt the same about her. he had just been better at hiding it.

"I will do everything in my power to try and make you not regret this," he whispered as he pulled away slowly, still keeping a close distance. Kim smiled happily, knowing that there had never been any other choice for her.