Be Nobody (35 page)

12
. Maia Szalavitz, “What Does a 400% Increase in Antidepressant Use Really Mean?”
Time
, October 20, 2011,
http://healthland.time.com/2011/10/20/what-does-a-400-increase-in-antidepressant-prescribing-really-mean/#ixx2LS6bouMr
.

13
. See
Mental Health: A Call for Action by World Health Ministers
(Geneva: World Health Organization, 2001),
http://www.who.int/mental_health/advocacy/en/Call_for_Action_MoH_Intro.pdf
.

14
. This according to an article entitled “In Defense of Self-Esteem,” written by Senator John Vasconcellos, Robert Reasoner, Michele Borba, Len Duhl, and Jack Canfield:
http://www.self-esteem-nase.org/amember/newsarticles/InDefenseofSelf-Esteem.pdf
. The article was published in response to a critique of the self-esteem movement written by Lauren Slater,
“The Trouble with Self-Esteem,”
New York Times Magazine
, February 3, 2002,
http://www.nytimes.com/2002/02/03/magazine/03ESTEEM.html
? . . .all.

15
. Lewis,
Mere Christianity
, 197.

Chapter 1

1
. Cited in John Broomfield,
Other Ways of Knowing: Recharting Our Future with Ageless Wisdom
(Rochester, VT: Inner Traditions, 1997), 73.

2
. Alan Watts,
The Book: On the Taboo against Knowing Who You Are
(New York: Vintage Books, 1989), 55. For a more weighty enunciation of the same problem, here's eighteenth-century philosopher David Hume's frustrated
cri de coeur
: “For my part, when I enter most intimately into what I call
myself
, I always stumble on some particular perception or other, of heat or cold, light or shade, love or hatred, pain or pleasure, colour or sound, etc. I never catch
myself
, distinct from such perceptions.” David Hume,
Treatise of Human Nature
, ed. by L. A. Selby-Bigge (New York: Oxford University Press, 1978), book 1, part 4, section 6.

3
. William Shakespeare,
As You Like It
, act 2, scene 7.

4
. Jane Wagner and Lily Tomlin,
The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe
.

5
. Miles Orvell,
The Real Thing: Imitation and Authenticity in American Culture, 1880–1940
(Chapel Hill: University of North Carolina Press, 1989), xxiii.

6
. Fred Rogers, “You Are Special,” 1967. The complete lyrics to the song can be found online at
http://pbskids.org/rogers/songLyricsYouAreSpecial.html
.

7
. For a rendition of the speech the Reverend Jackson did with a multicultural audience of small children on the television show
Sesame Street
, see
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTB1h18bHlY
.

8
. The Bhagavad Gita 6.5. All translations from Sanskrit and Pali texts cited in this book are my own unless otherwise noted.

9
. Ashtavakra Gita 8.4.

10
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
8.134–135.

11
. Quoted in John Michael Talbot and Steve Rabey,
The Lessons of Saint Francis: How to Bring Simplicity and Spirituality into Your Daily Life
(New York: Plume, 1998), 49.

12
. Quoted in Robert Wingate,
Pocket Wisdom: Inspirational Quotations from East and West for Daily Living
(CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, 2011), 65.

13
. Thomas Merton,
New Seeds of Contemplation
(New York: New Directions, 1961), 8.

14
. Quoted in Heinrich Robert Zimmer,
Philosophies of India
(Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press, 1969), 462.

15
. Quoted in Kathlin Austin,
Wise People Quotes
(CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, 2013), 15.

16
. Lynn Hirschberg, “The Misfit,”
Vanity Fair
, April 1991. Reprinted in
All about Madonna
,
http://allaboutmadonna.com/madonna-interviews-articles/vanity-fair-april-1991
.

17
. For one indication of the negative effects of the cultural emphasis on being “special,” see “Why Generation Y Yuppies Are Unhappy,”
Huffington Post
, September 15, 2013,
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/wait-but-why/generation-y-unhappy_b_3930620.html
.

18
. Dalai Lama,
Beyond Religion
, 28, 29.

19
. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi,
Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience
(New York: Harper & Row, 1990), 1.

20
. Qur'an 2:213. From the online translation found at
http://quod.lib.umich.edu/k/koran/
.

21
. See
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
7.2, where “depression” (
vishada
) and “low self-esteem” (
atmavamanya
) are listed among the obstacles to the cultivation of “joyful effort,” the enthusiastic energy needed to overcome unhappiness and suffering.

22
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
7.17–18.

23
. Katha Upanishad 1.2.18.

24
. Ashtavakra Gita 18.9.

25
. Shvetashvatara Upanishad 4.6–7.

Chapter 2

1
. Lewis,
Mere Christianity
, 122.

2
. Johnny Cash, “No Earthly Good,”
The Rambler
(Columbia Records, 1977). The complete lyrics can be found at
www.lyricsondemand.com/j/johnnycashlyrics/noearthlygoodlyrics.html
.

3
. William Paul Young,
The Shack
(Los Angeles: Windblown Media, reissue edition, 2011), 159.

4
. Eckhart Tolle,
A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose
(New York: Penguin Books, 2005), 67.

5
. Quoted in Lama Surya Das,
The Big Questions: How to Find Your Own Answers to Life's Essential Mysteries
(Emmaus, PA: Rodale Books, 2007), 215.

6
. Matthew 7:2–3.

7
. Matthew 7:4–5.

8
. Lewis,
Mere Christianity
, 121–22.

9
. Professor Roy Baumeister, interview by Neal Conan,
Talk of the Nation
, National Public Radio, February 4, 2002,
http://donpugh.dyndns.org/Psych%20Interests/Self-esteem/Questioning%20the%20conventional%20wisdom%20of%20self-esteem.htm
. Baumeister also makes reference to a study that found that 90 percent of us think we're above average drivers. Another research project discovered that
none
of the high school students surveyed thought they were below average in the ability to get along with others. Like Garrison Keillor's fabled “Lake Wobegon,” where “all the women are strong, all the men are good looking, and all the children are above average,” we often seem reluctant to say we're just average, even when we are. See
http://prairiehome.publicradio.org/about/podcast/
.

10
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
7.57–58.

11
. Cf. ibid., 8.127: “Because of my wish to be elevated in importance, I will find myself in unpleasant realms, ugly, and stupid.”

12
. Jack D. Maser, “About Anxiety and Depression,”
Freedom from Fear
, accessed November 29, 2013,
http://www.freedomfromfear.org/AboutAnxietyandDepression.en.html
.

13
. Lewis,
Mere Christianity
, 121.

14
. Tolle,
A New Earth
, 44.

15
. Ibid., 51.

Chapter 3

1
. Anup Shaw, “Poverty Facts and Stats,”
Global Issues
, January 7, 2013,
http://www.globalissues.org/article/26/poverty-facts-and-stats
.

2
. Yoga Sutra 2.4; 2.13.

3
. Yoga Sutra 2.5.

4
. Maha Satipatthana Suttanta, verse 5. From
Dialogues of the Buddha
, trans. T. W. Rhys Davids and C. A. F. Rhys Davids (1910; repr., Delhi: Motilal Banarsidass, 2000), and cited in Edwin F. Bryant's
The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali
(New York: North Point Press, 2009), 180.

5
. Jone Johnson Lewis, “Gloria Steinem Quotes,”
About.com
, “Women's History,”
http://womenshistory.about.com/cs/quotes/a/qu_g_steinem.htm
.

6
. Ashtavakra Gita 1.11 (emphasis added).

Chapter 4

1
. Julian Baggini,
The Ego Trick: What Does It Mean to You?
(London: Granta Books, 2011), 40.

2
. Bhagavad Gita 2.40.

3
. Yoga Sutra 2.4.

4
. Matthew 7:16–18.

5
. The Tolstoy quote is cited in a recent edition of Ralph Waldo Emerson's
Self Reliance
(The Domino Project, 2011), 50.

6
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
5.14 (emphasis added).

7
. Cited in Csikszentmihalyi,
Flow
, 121. Modern films like
Memento
and
Total Recall
(for the latter, see chapter 7) turn on the question of what becomes of self-identity when memory is erased.

8
. Csikszentmihalyi,
Flow
, 133.

9
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
4.37–38.

10
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
4.44.

11
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
4.29, 43.

12
. See also the
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
6.41, where Shantideva says that it is better to get angry at anger itself than at a person who provokes anger in you.

13
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
7.55–56: “Everything should be conquered by me; I should be defeated by nothing! I should carry myself with pride, for I am the child of the Conquering Lions. Those pitiable beings who are defeated by pride are not those who possess pride. Those possessed of pride never become slaves of the enemy which is pride; others have turned into slaves.” Compare this to French author Georges Bernanos's dictum:
“It's a fine thing to rise above pride, but you must have pride to do so.”
The Diary of a Country Priest: A Novel
(Cambridge, MA: Da Capo Press, 2002), 224.

14
. Quoted in Daniel Akst,
We Have Met the Enemy: Self-Control in an Age of Excess
(New York: Penguin Press, 2011), 2.

15
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
7.72.

16
. Csikszentmihalyi,
Flow
, 9.

17
. Josie Billington,
Eliot's Middlemarch
, Reader's Guide (New York: Continuum, 2008), 89.

Chapter 5

1
. Quoted in John Cook, comp., and Steve Deger and Leslie Ann Gibson, eds.,
The Book of Positive Quotations
(Minneapolis: Fairview Press, 2007), 27.

2
. Thich Nhat Hanh,
Interbeing: Fourteen Guidelines for Engaged Buddhism
, ed. Fred Eppsteiner, 3rd ed. (Berkeley, CA: Parallax Press, 1988).

3
. Desmond Tutu,
No Future without Forgiveness
(Colorado Springs, CO: Image, 2000), 31.

4
. Ursula K. Le Guin,
The Left Hand of Darkness
(New York: Ace Trade, 2000), 151.

5
. Dean Martin, “You're Nobody 'til Somebody Loves You,”
The Door Is Still Open to My Heart
(Capitol Records, 1960). The complete lyrics can be found at
www.metrolyrics.com/youre-nobody-till-somebody-loves-you-lyrics-dean-martin.html
.

6
. Ibid.

7
. Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh,
Tantra: The Supreme Understanding
(Poona, India: Rajneesh Foundation, 1975), 17.

8
. Quoted in Alain de Botton,
The Consolations of Philosophy
(New York: Vintage, 2001), 146.

9
. 
Guide to the Bodhisattva's Way of Life
7.31.

10
. Bhagavad Gita 18.64–65.

11
. Bhagavad Gita 15.15.

Chapter 6

1
. Csikszentmihalyi,
Flow
, 4.

2
. Ibid., 71.

3
. Jiddu Krishnamurti,
Think on These Things
(Ojai, CA: Krishnamurti Foundation of America, 1964), 65.

4
. Abraham Maslow,
Religions, Values, and Peak-Experiences
(New York: Penguin, 1970), 62.

5
. John Stuart Mill,
Autobiography
, in Harvard Classics, vol. 25, ed. Charles W. Eliot (New York: P. F. Collier & Son, 1909), 94. Or as Csikszentmihalyi puts it, “It is by being fully involved with every detail of our lives, whether good or bad, that we find happiness, not by trying to look for it directly” (
Flow
, 2).

6
. Tyler Kingkade, “Millennials Are More Stressed Out than Older Generations,”
Huffington
Post
, February 8, 2013,
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/08/millennials-stress_n_2646947.html
.

7
. Ed Smith, “What Some People Call Idleness Is Sometimes the Best Investment,”
New Statesman
, July 19, 2012,
http://www.newstatesman.com/business/business/2012/07/what-some-people-call-idleness-often-best-investment
.

8
. For one analysis of how we are keeping ourselves constantly available for work even when we're supposedly on vacation, see Bob Sullivan's “How the Smartphone Killed the Three-Day Weekend,”
CNBC
, May 24, 2013,
http://www.cnbc.com/id/100765600
.