Beat of the Heart (20 page)

rim of my glass. “Look, I know I just met you two, but I have to ask. How do you guys deal with it—

the women?”

Abby let out a long, exaggerated sigh. “It isn’t easy,” she admitted. “I mean, I don’t have a past, so

I can’t help but focus too much on Jake’s and if he’s going to repeat any former mistakes. At the end

of the day, I just have to believe that he truly loves me enough to be faithful because he sure as hell

knows it’s a deal breaker between us.”

When I turned to Lily, she shrugged. “You want to believe your man is committed, and he wouldn’t

stray. But then when you’ve been up all night with a teething baby, you’re carrying around ten extra

pounds of baby weight, and you have absolutely no desire to screw him senseless like he wants, you

can’t help but wonder why he doesn’t just take up some slut’s offer to bang him. But like Abby, Bray

knows that cheating is a deal breaker, regardless of Jude and Melody. And no matter what, I know

that he loves me and our kids.”

“I’ve been through a cheating fiancé not to mention…” I quickly pinched my lips shut before I went

any further. Finally, I added, “I don’t know if I have it in me to deal with all this.”

“That’s totally understandable. But if anyone is worth trying to wade through all the bullshit for,

it’s AJ. He’s a total sweetheart. I don’t know what Jake would have done without him after his

mother died,” Abby said.

Lily nodded. “After knowing him for five years, I can vouch for that. He’s got a heart of gold.”

Deep down, I knew what they were saying was true. “Somewhere deep down beneath that cocky

exterior?”

Abby laughed. “Yep, once you chip that all away, he’s a keeper for sure.”

I tore my gaze from them to look at AJ pounding his heart out on the drums. He glanced over at me

and winked. Maybe the girls were right…maybe he really was worth fighting for.

After I did a sizzling finale on the cymbals, Jake eased his guitar down and took up the mic.

“Thanks again for coming out. We love y’all. Keep it rockin’ always!” I hauled ass out of the drum kit

to join him and the others to take our usual band bow. I was more ready than ever to get off the stage

and get over to Mia. More importantly I was ready to get her the hell out of Eastman’s and back to my

place.

But Jake busted my balls when he leaned over to yell into my ear over the roar of the crowd. “Let’s

make a lap or two around the bar, speak to the fans, and sign some shit.”

“Whatever,” I grumbled.

He laughed. “Easy man, sorry for the cock block, but your dick is just gonna have to wait.”

When I caught Mia’s gaze, I held up a finger and mouthed, “Just a minute.”

She nodded and continued talking with Abby and Lily. Outfitted with two of our jacked up body

guards, Jake and Rhys started making their way on one side of the room while Brayden and I took the

other. I signed napkins, CD’s, boobs—you name it while posing for pictures with fans. It took a good

hour to work both sides of the room, and by the time we were finished, I was sporting some serious

blue balls for Mia’s amazing pussy.

Once I was free, I waved at Mia and then started making my way across the crowd to our table.

Just before I reached it, Kylie bounded out and wrapped her arms in a death-like vise around my

waist, molding herself against me like a second skin. “Hey stranger!” she exclaimed over the roar of

the house music.

Fuuuuuuuck!!! This was so not happening. “Hey,” I replied tersely, as I met Mia’s questioning gaze

over Kylie’s shoulder. When I tried extricating myself from her, Kylie held on tight.

“You left me high and dry the other night.” She gave me a seductive grin. “Wanna finish what we

started?”

“I don’t—” Before I could finish, Kylie’s lips were on mine. I jerked away. My chest constricted

in agony at the sight of Mia’s face. She stared at me with wide-eyes and a quivering lower lip. Her

usual tough and in-control exterior appeared crumpled, and I felt like the biggest asshole in the world.

Kylie’s blonde brows rose in surprise at my reaction. “What’s the matter, baby? I didn’t think you

were one for playing hard to get.”

“Listen, now is not a good time.” As I started to pull Kylie’s arms away from me, Mia bolted out of

her seat, streaking towards the door as fast as she could with the packed crowd. Abandoning Kylie, I

started weaving my way through the crowd. “Mia, wait!” I called.

Ignoring me, she kept fighting her way through the people. “Fuck,” I muttered before I resorted

manhandling people out of the way to get to her. Grabbing her by the arm, I whirled her around,

forcing her to look at me. “What the hell are you doing?”

Tears sparkled in her dark eyes. “I’m sorry, AJ, but I have to go.”

“Come with me,” I shouted over the crowd and house music. Taking her hand, I led her through the

mass of people to the backroom where we’d first met up earlier in the evening.

Once I closed the door behind us, I asked, “Is this about what just happened with Kylie?”

Mia snorted. “No dumbass, it’s about the fact the drinks here suck.”

I held up my hands. “Look, I’m sorry. That was a douche question. Of course, you’re pissed about

that. But she’s just an old girlfriend of mine who thought we’d started something up again a few

weeks ago. There’s nothing there. I swear.”

Mia shook her head. “It’s not just her. Your past seems to be everywhere. I couldn’t even go to the

bathroom without running into some skank who’d blown you before and had ideas she was getting her

hooks into you again for a repeat performance.”

I grimaced when I realized who she was talking about Lyla—one of the Sugar Magnolia girls.

“Nothing would have happened with her. I’m here with you.”

My words didn’t appear to mean shit to Mia because her expression remained sad. “I’m sorry, AJ,

but being in your world tonight was a bad idea—it just showed me how much
we’re
a bad idea.”

My brows furrowed in confusion. “What are you talking about?”

She closed her eyes for a few seconds before opening them again. “I know it’s only been a week,

but I like you. I like you a lot, okay? I don’t know where this is heading, but I know that if things keep

up like they are…” She drew in a ragged breath. “The bottom line is I’m not cut out for your world. I

have too many of my own issues with men coupled with my insecurities to deal with your groupies.”

“Dammit, Mia, I swear that Kylie and those other girls don’t mean shit to me.”

“But they mean a lot to me. I don’t know how to deal with it. You were just supposed to be about

me getting back in the game, not being tossed right back out into the same shark-infested waters as

before.” When I winced at her words, she reached up to cup my cheek. “I wish I could do this, but I

can’t.” When she started to open the door, my palm landed on the wood, slamming it shut.

Desperation and anger rocketed through me. “So that’s it? We’re totally fucked as a potential

couple just because I have a dick. That’s bullshit.”

“You don’t understand—”

“No, I don’t think
you
understand. When I’m in a relationship, I’m in it for the long haul. I have

never cheated once on any of my girlfriends. Ever. I was a freakin’ altar boy back in the day, and that

makes me take fidelity pretty damn serious. Get it through your thick skull, Mia, I’m not Dev—I’m not

going to do that to you.” When Mia continued staring down at the grungy carpet, I huffed out a growl

of frustration. “Look at me dammit.” I reached over and cupped her face in my hands, forcing her to

meet my eyes. “I mean it. I’m not Dev. Don’t walk away from me just because you think I’m someone

I’m not.”

Pain replaced Mia’s sad expression. “I wish that it was just about Dev, but there are other…bad

experiences from my past that make this hard for me.”

Realizing I wasn’t getting anywhere with her, I decided to change up my game. With a sneer, I

replied, “Where’s the ball-busting, Sicilian Mia that went toe to toe with me the first time I met her?

The last thing I ever would have thought is that you’re a coward.”

Her dark eyes narrowed at me. “How dare you call me a coward! If you knew what all I’d been

through.”

“We all have our shit. Quit acting like a martyr to your past.”

“Fuck you!” she spat, before she reached for the doorknob. I knocked her hand away before

gripping her shoulders and whirling her body around. When I molded myself against her, she

struggled against me. “Stop it, AJ,” she hissed.

I silenced her by bringing my mouth down hard against hers. At first, it was like kissing a brick

wall, but the moment I slid my tongue against her lips, a tiny moan escaped her. Her reaction must’ve

spooked her because she tried to jerk away. Instead, I tightened my arms around her. “Don’t run

away. You want this…you want
me
.”

Jerking her chin up, she glared at me. “It doesn’t matter what I want. Considering my past, I wanted

a lot of shit that fucking wrecked me. So, let me go.”

A volatile mixture of desperation and fury swelled in my chest, and I fought to keep my head on

straight and not explode. I’d never met a woman like Mia, but at the same time, I knew if I let her out

the door, I might not ever see her again. I was not going to let that happen—not while I was still

breathing. I shook my head at her. “I’m not going anywhere, and you’re sure as hell not going

anywhere,” I hissed against her mouth. My hands swept around her back, searching out the zipper on

her dress. Once I found it, I jerked it down before pulling both of the straps on her dress down. As my

hand came around her ribcage, I grazed her breast, and she sucked in a breath. Before I even touched

her breast, the nipple had hardened in anticipation.

“What do you think you’re doing?” she questioned breathlessly, as I continued to palm her breast.

“I’m about to fuck some sense into you,” I growled, as I jerked the hem of my shirt over my head.

When she started to protest again, I took both of her hands in one of mine and pinned them above

her head. Her eyes widened, not with fear, but with desire. “You like that, don’t you?”

“No,” she snapped, thrashing against me.

I gave a low laugh. “Oh yes, you do like it.” Leaning over, I licked a trail from her chin up to her

ear. A shudder rippled over her body, and I knew with every second she was warming more and