Beautifully Awake (14 page)

I
glanced at my phone trying to focus, still half asleep. I had to change that damn text alert chime. And I really needed to stop sleeping in contacts.

I’m in labor

Oh my god.
Pick up.
Why wasn’t she picking up the damn phone?

“Hey, Asspuck. What happened to calling when you got home?”

“Sier, where are you? It’s too early ... you okay, the baby?”

“Oh. I’m not in labor,” she said wryly.

“Sierra! What the hell is wrong with you? I almost had a freaking heart attack.”

“Good, that’s what you get. Now you know how I felt. Maybe you’ll think twice before disappearing for a weekend without calling to let me know you’re okay. For all I knew, Dr. Hot-as-Balls kidnapped and killed you.”

“Dramatic much? I texted you.”

“Oh, you mean your
sorry I have to cancel, explain later
text an hour before we were supposed to meet. That text?”

“K, Mom, point made. Are you done being annoying?”

“Hell no. Now I want details. And don’t leave out the good parts. Damn, you weren’t kidding. Holy shit, he’s hot. But please say he’s not always that intense. He looked like a man possessed. I couldn’t tell if he wanted to rip your clothes off or Guy’s eyes out more. I can’t believe I left you. Shit. I totally wasn’t thinking. My damn placenta brain. With Dodd away all week I was horny, and then when you didn’t answer your phone, I felt like total shit that I encouraged you. I just, I don’t know, I didn’t expect him to be so...” Sierra was rambling. Sierra
never
rambled. And that made me feel guilty.

“Stop. I get it. You’re so right. I’m sorry. I should have called, but really ... you don’t have to worry. He’s definitely intense, but that’s only one part of him. He’s the real deal, Sier,” I paused. It was difficult to describe it or define it. “I can’t explain it, but it’s good. He’s good. I think I
trust
him ... am I crazy?”

“
Fine, you’re forgiven, but the jury is still out on Dr. Fucknuts. Speaking of—still waiting. How was it? Should I call him Dr. Crowbar? When they are that insanely hot, it’s a flip of the coin whether they actually know how to use the damn thing, so which is it? Please say you scored
heads
?”

I chuckled. “You have serious issues, you know that, right?”

“Absolutely, but that’s why you love me! Don’t leave me hanging.”

“Fine. Yes. Definitely heads ... umm ...
all around.
” If Sierra only saw my smile.

“That’s freaking fantastic.” Her belly laugh was contagious even over the phone.

“Okay. Are we done now? I have to get ready for work, and I’m seeing you for lunch in only a few hours.”

“Wait. You’re not at work? It’s almost eight. Where the hell are you?”

Oh, lying sprawled out in Dr. Sex’s massive bed, naked.

“Oh. We stayed at Chase’s last night. We got back from New York a little late, and his apartment is closer to the hospital.”
Not to mention Dr. Sexy is also Dr. Possessive and not really big into sharing, not even with my apartment.

“You were in the city? What? But why aren’t you at work? Did your vagina need a sick day?”

“Ha-ha. NO! Just going in a little late.” I wasn’t even sure where to begin with that one. I gave in on the whole morning rounding thing last night, but I had a feeling we needed to re-address that issue. I did not need to bring up
Dr. Dominant
just yet.

“Hmm. Sounds a little suspect to me.”

“Sier, can we finish this at lunch? I really have to get ready.”

“Oh shit. I almost forgot. I saw Kate at Whole Foods yesterday and she seemed a little down in the dumps over shithead, so I invited her to lunch. That’s the other reason I called early. I knew you probably wouldn’t want to announce you were screwing your boss at lunch.”

Obviously.

“Thanks for the heads up. See you later then.”

“K. Oh, and Lil … for what it’s worth, I hope he’s the real deal. You really do deserve it.”

“Thanks, Sierra. Honestly, I don’t know what to hope for. But I’ll admit, for the first time in a long time, I feel pretty lucky.”

“You should, after all, you got
heads.”

Freak!

I lay in Chase’s massive king-size bed covered in stark white linens. It reminded me of his Manhattan mausoleum bedroom, but not as cozy. It was simple and bare and lacked color, a clean slate. I wondered if he just moved in or simply liked it that way. According to his best friend, he picked Philly over two other cities he had strong ties to. Granted, if Constance was my mother, I probably would have picked California. A six-hour plane ride seemed like a sane distance from his bat shit crazy mother. And I was in her company for less than an hour. Boston, though, was still a bit of a mystery. Chase mentioned during dinner that he attended BU’s six-year combined undergraduate MD program, and Asher mentioned something about a business there. Boston could have been a solid choice if he wanted a break from his
toxic
world. Not that I was complaining about his ultimate choice.
Definitely not complaining.
The past few days gave me small glimpses and snapshots—enough to know I desired more. Everything. I needed him to trust me enough to share.
Pot meet kettle.

Suddenly the room’s silence was drowned out by a loud monotone voice with a familiar message.
95 is backed up, Academy to Cottman
. No shit. I chuckled to myself. Three years and always the same exact traffic report. After a second, I got out of my own head and realized the news was coming from the alarm clock that was now
across
the room. Last night, I had smiled seeing the fluorescent hue bedside, illuminating the obscene hour Chase finally tucked my very sated body tight against his for the night.

Dr. Bossy must have set it for me before he left, strategically moving it so I couldn’t snooze.
Totally has my number.

But the news, really? It seemed like a stupid thing to notice. But I finally made the connection. His anxiety around music had to stem from the death of his sister. I remembered how melancholy he got when I asked him what happened to his high school band, the band he shared with his sister.
A real tragedy
. Music must have become too much of a reminder after she died, but for some reason I seemed to be the exception. He allowed me to choose music for his OR cases, and he chose music for our night at the planetarium, knowing how much I loved it.

I slapped the alarm clock hard and headed for the bathroom. The sleek earth tone marble sanctuary was filling with steam when the apartment door buzzed.

Despite my slight embarrassment opening Chase’s door as the obvious overnight guest, questionably dressed no less, I was more than pleasantly surprised.

“Good morning, Ms. Porter, sorry to bother you. Dr. Colton wanted me to deliver this.” The quirky doorman I recognized from my first visit handed me a steaming Starbucks cup.
Mmm. Definitely has my number.

Thanks for the latte.

Very sweet :)

I knew he was probably getting ready to start a case, but I sent him the text anyway. His quick reply made me smile.

No. Sweet is the way you taste.

But I’m glad you enjoyed your girl coffee.

Hope you had enough time to put some clothes on.

Dr. Sweet, meet Dr. Possessive...

And here I thought you set the alarm

so I wouldn’t be even LATER for work??

Did he really time the alarm for the doorman’s coffee delivery? No. Crazy talk.

Your boss says you’re not late.

But your boyfriend is waiting for an answer.

If you must know-your case manager is naked,

getting in the shower because she is LATE for work.

But your girlfriend answered the door in your robe.

Reminder for my case manager girlfriend

I don’t like to share.

Not even with the shower.

See YOUR beautiful soon. Xo.

Mouth open, heart pounding, sex twinging ... speechless.

How did he do that again?

“W
here were you this morning?” I jumped at the sound of Guy’s voice at my back. Damn it, I totally lacked a plan. “Why weren’t you at rounds? You sick?” I closed my tablet and swiveled on my chair. “Chase said he heard from you this morning, said you were going to be late. Is everything okay, doll? It might be none of my business, but I just know how you are, you never like to be late.” He was sincere.

“I’m okay, Guy. I just, um ... had to take care of something this morning. How are our patients?” I took a play from Sierra’s book and tried to change the subject.

“They’re fine.” He deadpanned, cocking his head to the side to stare directly in my eyes.

“What happened to you Friday night?”

“Hey, Lil, there you are, 508 needs rehab.” Saved by Sam’s voice. He slapped my back “So nice of you to grace us with your presence.” He laughed.

“Whatever, Sam, quit it,” I sneered.

“What? Just because you’ve gotten dismissed from morning rounds and Jackson walks on water, whatever, I’m stuck doing all the shit work. Damn, I totally picked the wrong profession.”

“Dismissed from morning rounds?” A ping of irritation resurfaced. I thought it was my decision when and if anyone found out about our relationship.

“Yeah. Colton made it pretty clear that you weren’t going to be rounding with us anymore in the morning.”

Guy’s eyes bored into me. He hadn’t missed that conversation, yet he was totally prying me for information.

“Um, well, yeah this morning I had to take care of something, and then he said going forward I could come in later, like nine.” I hated lying; it wasn’t me. I sucked at it. I reopened my tablet and loaded my discharges, hoping everyone would stop drilling me.

“Shit.” Sam’s phone chimed with a new text. “Um, guys, since you’re all here, I’ve been meaning to tell you something.” Sam was my saving distraction
again
.

“Sammy, whatcha hiding?” Leanne silently emerged from the supply closet. She never missed a trick.

“Not hiding anything, just some news.” Sam grinned. “I’m gonna be a father.”

“What! Sam that’s so exciting, congratulations.” I jumped up and pulled him in for a bear hug.

“Dude, that’s so cool.” The boys shook hands and slapped each other’s backs.

Leanne joined me with a big kiss on his cheek. “Sammy’s gonna be a daddy! Good for you, buddy.”

“Thanks, guys, we’re psyched, but I really need a favor. Becky has her first big appointment today, and I promised her I would try my hardest to go. Can you guys cover for me? I think I should only be gone an hour or so.”

“Of course, dude. That’s an important visit. Chase only has one case slated today and so far there aren’t any new admissions. We’ll be fine.” Guy mimicked me. “Besides, Chief seems to be in a surprisingly good mood today.”

Oh, I wonder why
.

“Thanks, I really appreciate it.” Sam’s excited energy was contagious.

My phone vibrated.

Beautiful, you in yet?

Yes I’m working.

Just spoke to your boss,

I think you’re in trouble.

He wants to meet with you immediately

In private.

Oh, does he now?

“Whatcha smiling at, girl?” Leanne did that weird thing where you half talk and half sing.

I was so absorbed in texting I totally forgot where I was for a minute. I looked up and saw that Guy and Sam were gone. For now. No way in hell Guy was going to let this go.

“Oh nothing.” I stood ready to retreat to my office. “I gotta run. I have a shitload of paperwork to get done.”

“I call bullshit. Be that way, you’ll spill the beans eventually.”

I must have had “giddy” stamped across my forehead. I was definitely not getting off this floor without giving Leanne something. That girl smelled freaking sex.

15 minutes-

Your office.

The smile spread across my face.

“Lee, Lili.” Kate was hysterically crying, looking completely disheveled when she flew into the nurses’ station.

“Hey, hey. What’s going on?” I tried to calm her.

“Shit, Kate, what did he do now?” Leanne didn’t waste a minute. “Let’s go somewhere more private.” Leanne coaxed her down the hall to an on-call room.

Kate paced back and forth. “I’m such an idiot. I knew I should’ve stayed away from him this morning. I knew something wasn’t right.” She grabbed her forehead and squeezed, slumping into one of the desk chairs. I hated seeing her like this … or any woman like this.

“What the fuck, you’re a mess!” Leanne was definitely losing patience. I crouched down in front of her.

“Kate, sweetie, talk to us,” I whispered. My experience with abused children and women told me the last thing Kate needed was another person badgering her.